Author's Note: The lyrics below are mine. I own those. If I hear them being used somewhere else, bad things will happen. Not really. (But seriously).
CAPS = Screams
Italics = Stage/Camera ations
( ) = Character actions
EXT. - Street
Zach is driving down the road in his Jeep. Of course, there is heavy metal/hard rock music playing from the radio.
Zach: It's too early for this shit...
INT - THE CREAMERY
Zach enters the 50's themed diner. Bret is sitting at the bar, drawing in a sketch book. Bret notices Zach.
Bret: Zach...you're early.
Zach: Don't get used to it. (He sits next to Bret.) Ugh...10:30. To early for a Saturday.
Bret: Well, money's money my friend.
Zach: Be that as it may, I don't want people to flood the store right when we open.
Bret's face turns towards the door.
Bret: You know what sucks?
Zach: What?
Bret: (He points towards the door.) That.
Zach's eyes widen as a crowd of people flood The Creamery. The next song starts to play.
Zach: WHY CAN'T WE EVER CATCH A BREAK? THEY ALWAYS WANT THE DELICIOUS FOOD WE MAKE. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH SHIT WE TAKE. EVERYDAY WE'RE NOTHING BUT FAKE.
Zach and Bret go around doing normal work related activities throughout the song.
Zach: THEY WANT MILKSHAKES AND CURLY FRIES. THEY DON'T KNOW ALL OF THEM I DESPISE. I SIT AND PLOT THEIR UNTIMELY DEMISE. UNTIL THEN WE CONTINUE TO FORCE FEED THEM LIES.
Zach pulls out a guitar from no where and Bret uses an ice-cream scoop as a microphone.
Bret and Zach: FUCK YOU! PEOPLE WE DO NOT KNOW. YOU MAKE WORK AS PAINFUL AS WATCHING GRASS GROW. DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO? THAN COME IN HERE MAKING US HATE YOU? WE WOULDN'T CARE IF THERE WERE ONLY A COUPLE. BUT WHEN IT'S ALL OF YOU OUR RAGE SO DOUBLES. PEOPLE WE DO NOT KNOW. GET YOUR TREATS AND THEN JUST GO!
As the musical interlude plays, Bret and Zach continue doing work tasks.
Zach: THE ORDERS GET SO COMPLICATED. FROM THESE BIGOTS SO LOST AND JADED. ALL CARE FOR THEM HAS FADED. HOW DO THEY NOT KNOW THEY'RE ALL SO HATED?
Repeat the chorus sequence, continue with the working montage. (Because I'm too lazy to re-type and/or copy and paste)
Zach: GET OUT! WE DON'T KNOW YOU PERSONALLY! IT'S TIME THAT YOU FINALLY LEAVE! GET OUT! WE DON'T KNOW YOU PERSONALLY! SO GO, GO FUCKING LEAVE!
Throughout the breakdown sequence, the customers are frightened and scurry out of the store.
Bret and Zach look at each other, nod and then fist bump.
Bret: Excellent job my friend.
Zach: Thanks. I was improving.
Bret: Well played, sir.
Zach: I've been working on my free-styling.
Bret: Wow, sounded good.
Zach: Appreciate it man.
There is a long pause. The two of them look around aimlessly then they look at a clock.
Zach: Bail?
Bret: Let me grab my keys.
The two leave the store and Bret locks the door behind them. As they walk into the parking lot, Zach stops.
Zach: Hold on a minute. (He takes off his Creamery polo and is in an Affliction t-shirt now.) Much better.
Bret: Very metal.
Zach: That's how I roll.
They continue on and get in Zach's Jeep. As he cranks the engine, Bret's phone rings.
Bret: Hello? (Pause.) Sure, hold on. (to ZACH) Wanna go get pizza?
Zach: Pizza? Hell yeah.
Bret: (To phone) Yeah, we're on our way.
