Disclaimer: Koisuru Boukun and all of the characters contained therein are the sole property of Takanaga Hinako. I own nothing. I profit nothing. I am nothing.
Title: And So It Is
Author: AngelIsOnCrack
Rating: Moderate
Synopsis: That first night with Tatsumi Souichi was absolute wonder but what Morinaga Tetsuhiro doesn't know is that what he thinks was Senpai's first time...wasn't.
Chapter Note: I have no idea what the names are of those kids that were interrogating Senpai with Yamaguchi when Morinaga went AWOL in the Koisuru Boukun OVA 2. If they have proper names then I do apologize to them but what's in a name? That which we call a rose...well, you all know what I mean.
Chapter Two
"But I never see you, Angel-kun! You're always so busy with that senpai of yours. You don't come around anymore."
"I'm sorry, Hiroto-kun," Morinaga apologized to his defeated friend as he adjusted his hold on his cell phone. "But Senpai really needs my help right now. He's about to have his experiment reviewed and we need the reports to go perfectly."
Hiroto sighed into Morinaga's ear causing the dark-haired man to frown. "You university kids. Always too busy doing homework to see poor lonely Hiroto."
Morinaga immediately chuckled at Hiroto's response. "I know you are far from lonely, Hiroto-kun. What about that blonde German guy that you hooked up with last week?"
"Christian? Oh, he was only in town for a little while. He left a few days ago. He was really fun, Angel-kun. I love Germans. They're so rigid and stiff but once you get them to loosen up...ahhh..."
"Okay, I got it, I got it," Morinaga interrupted his friend's admiration for European men. "Once Senpai's review is complete then I'll stop by. I promise."
"I'm gonna hold you to that, Angel-kun," Hiroto replied sternly. "Now I'll see you later."
"I promise," Morinaga reassured once more before ending the call.
He really did feel bad about not visiting the auburn-haired man more often. Hiroto had proven to be a great listener and confidant to him time and time again. Morinaga knew that anybody else would burst into madness if they were forced to listen to him wail about his Senpai-related woes as much as Hiroto did but the man never complained. Much. Morinaga assumed it was a bartender trait to be genuinely interested (or at least to be good at pretending to be genuinely interested) in the problems of others. Well, that and the fact that Hiroto was just that kind of person.
Morinaga put his phone away and was surprised to see a couple of his classmates clustered around the door to the lab. Spotting Yamaguchi, he tapped the man on his shoulder and saw relief written in his eyes at the sight of Morinaga.
"Oh, good. You're here."
"What's going on? Did something happen?" Morinaga questioned with a tiny tremor in his chest. Had something happened to Senpai?
The students shared a nervous look amongst themselves before Yamaguchi answered carefully. "The E.P. balance in our lab broke this morning and we wanted to ask Tatsumi-senpai if we could borrow the one in this lab but...well, he's not in a very good mood right now."
"That's putting it mildly, Yamaguchi-kun," Tanaka Shozou, a fellow student in a few of Morinaga's classes added in. "Hamada-kun was bleeding when he came out."
Morinaga's eyes widened in shock. He knew Senpai could be vicious at times but to cause another student to bleed? Something must be wrong. This wasn't typical run-of-the-mill bad day behavior for his senpai.
"I'm dead serious, Kimiko," a voice spoke up heatedly from behind Yamaguchi and Tanaka. "I'm not gonna take this kind of shit lying down."
"Hamada-kun, please don't," a soft voice pleaded. "It'll cause more trouble. The last thing you need right now is to be kicked out of the school."
"I don't care! That pretty boy is a dead man!"
Yamaguchi and Tanaka were pushed aside as a boy with tousled brown hair and murder in his step came through. Following him was Suga Kimiko, a petite soft-spoken girl that Morinaga had partnered with in a few lab experiments before.
"Don't!" Kimiko begged once more as she tugged at the livid man's sleeve. "Yama-kun, stop him!"
"Oi!" Hamada said to Morinaga who had stepped in front of the door to the lab. "Move. Who is this guy?"
"Morinaga Tetsuhiro," Yamaguchi replied. "He's Tatsumi-senpai's lab assistant and a friend of ours so please don't yell at him like that, Hama-kun."
Morinaga stood up taller as the man sized him up with gleaming brown eyes. The Three Holy Mountains could decide to erupt simultaneously at that moment and blanket Japan in thick smoke and ash and he would not allow this guy into the lab. There was no way he would allow Senpai to get hurt if he could help it. If he had to suffer some physical pain because of that then so be it. Anything to keep his love safe and happy. Well, safe at least.
A tense moment slithered past before the young man in front of him spoke. "Look, Morinaga-san, the last thing I want or need right now is to get into another fistfight with some shit but he hit me. I can't just turn tail on that. On the streets, that's called being a punk and I ain't no punk. So just let me pass so I can deal with this."
"I'm sorry, Hamada-san, but I can't let you do that."
"This has nothing to do with you!"
"Yes, it does."
"How the hell so?"
Kimiko gently placed a hand on the shoulder of the worked-up man. "Tatsumi-senpai is a friend of his, Hama-kun. He has a right to defend him."
Hamada clenched his fists and looked like he was about to start swinging but closed his eyes instead and exhaled slowly. He placed a hand on a huge red welt on the side of his face and met Morinaga's apologetic gaze. "Fine. I swore not to get into shit like this again so fine. But you tell that...friend of yours that he can't go around doing shit like that or he's gonna get his ass handed to him by some guy less forgiving than me."
Morinaga bowed deeply in apology to the other man. "I'm very sorry, Hamada-san. I'll tell him. I promise."
Hamada nodded and turned to Kimiko. "Kimiko, I'm hurt and you haven't even kissed me better. Cruelty, I tell you. Cruelty."
Kimiko giggled and turned away shyly. "I'm not your mother, Hama-kun."
"You're right about that because if you were, I could get arrested over the things that I'm thinking about you right now."
"Hamada-kun!"
The brown-haired man laughed at Kimiko's redddened face. "Come on, let's jet. I got a class in thirty and I can't be late again or Yamazaki-sensei is gonna grill my ass. See you guys later."
Kimiko turned twinkling grey eyes onto Morinaga. "We'll see you later, Morinaga-kun?"
"Of course," Morinaga answered warmly.
Kimiko beamed and quickly followed Hamada after throwing a goodbye to Yamaguchi and Tanaka.
"I'm telling you, Yama-kun, Kimiko is giving Hamada-kun a run for his money especially with Morinaga around."
Morinaga met Tanaka's thoughtful expression with a startled one of his own. "What do you mean, Tanaka?"
"It's pretty obvious that Hama-kun is in love with Kimiko but with the way she stares at you when you're around...I don't know. You noticed it, right, Yama-kun?"
Yamaguchi's reply was cut off by a sudden bang heard from within the lab followed by loud shouting that Morinaga could only identify as coming from his senpai.
"We'll be going now," Yamaguchi said as he and Tanaka started to back away from Morinaga and the lab door. "See you later, Morinaga."
"What about the balance?" Morinaga answered hurriedly in an effort to keep the two men by his side. While being alone with Senpai was something he usually looked forward to, he couldn't help but feel like a lamb heading for the slaughterhouse.
"You can just drop it off when you can!" Yamaguchi answered from halfway down the corridor. "Thank you, Morinaga!"
"Good luck!" Tanaka added as the two men swiftly retreated from view.
"You guys! Oi!" Morinaga called out but got nothing in return.
With a nervous sigh, he faced the door. He could do this. He had done this done before. It was just Senpai. His short-tempered, hot-headed, and tyranically violent senpai who had just punched a stranger in the face.
"I'm so dead," Morinaga mutttered as he slid the door open and entered. He immediately ducked in the case that a bottle would come hurtling towards his head as had happened in the past but no flying projectiles came. Tentatively, Morinaga called out for Senpai.
Morinaga scanned the room and came up with nothing. He double-checked and the result was the same. This was impossible. He had heard Senpai shouting a moment ago from the hall and there was only one door in and out. Senpai had to be somewhere in the lab.
Then Morinaga heard it. His olive-colored eyes widened in shock and he knew that this must be a dream of some sort because Senpai never...couldn't be...crying? Morinaga listened harder and he knew he wasn't mistaken. The soft sniffles and stifled whimpering...but it just couldn't be. Senpai never cried. At least, not around him.
"S-Senpai?" he called out softly as he tried to pinpoint the light-haired man's location. "Are you okay?"
He maneuvered around the lab and came to a stop. Senpai was slumped on the floor with his back against the cabinets and he was, without a doubt, crying. Morinaga felt his own eyes begin to well up when he realized that not only was the other man crying but he was sobbing.
He just couldn't take it. To hear such heart-wrenching noises coming from his steely senpai was wrong. It didn't fit together at all. He didn't know what happened but he did know that he needed to make this right again. He had promised to keep his love safe and not only physically but emotionally as well.
Morinaga knelt next to the distraught man and tenderly placed a hand on his shaking shoulder. "Senpai, what happened?"
Souichi's head snapped up at Morinaga's voice and he turned startled reddened eyes to his kouhai. "M-Morinaga?"
Morinaga nodded and watched silently as the man quickly wiped at his watery eyes with a sleeve in an effort to mask what he had been doing. The younger man noted that his senpai's hair had been let down again as the long fingers of Souichi's hands shook when they attempted to smooth the locks down.
"Y-you're fucking late again, you idiot," Souichi berated in a voice entirely too shaky for the words it said.
"I was here on time, Senpai, but I got caught up with an issue outside."
"What issue?"
Morinaga glanced over the man's disheveled appearance and decided that his tale of heroics could wait. There was something much more important to address at the moment. "Nothing. Senpai, will you tell me what happened?"
"Nothing happened, Morinaga."
"Then why were you crying just now?"
"I wasn't crying, moron! It's the dust in this filthy room! Would it kill you to clean up every now and again?"
"Senpai, don't lie. Please tell me what's wrong. I nee-I want to help."
"I don't need your fucking help so just back the hell off!"
Morinaga hit the floor as Senpai angrily shoved him and rose to his feet. He winced at the sound of the door being closed with a resonating crash and then it was silent. He shook his head and picked himself up off the floor.
That did not go over well at all but this was Senpai he was dealing with. He didn't honestly expect the man to throw himself into his arms and spill out all his secrets to him. Getting shoved to the floor was a mild response considering what Senpai had done to him in the past.
Morinaga was about to leave the lab and go after his runaway senpai when he was stopped by the ringing of his cell. Pulling it out from his coat, he took the call. "Morinaga."
"Morinaga-san," a quiet voice spoke through. "It's Tomoe."
"Tomoe-kun? Ah...hello. We haven't spoken in a while. How are you?"
"I'm doing good, Morinaga-san, thank you. How are you?"
"Pretty good, I guess. How are things with Kurokawa-san?"
"It's going really well. I got a job transfer to America and Kurokawa-san will be coming with me. I'm really excited."
"America? Tomoe-kun, that's great! Congratulations! Kurokawa-san is a good guy. There's no one out there more suited to go with you...than...him..."
Morinaga trailed off as realization struck him at what Tomoe had said. The younger man was leaving for America. With his boyfriend. Leaving behind his older brother. Who was fiercely overprotective of him. And hated said boyfriend. That's why Senpai had been crying. It had to be. There was nothing the other man cared for more than his family and to have his little brother alone in a new country with a man that Senpai believed to be under-handed and manipulative would be...it would be horrible.
"Morinaga-san, is my brother around?" Tomoe whispered in a voice tinged with tears.
"He left not too long ago. I was about to go after him."
"W-was he upset when he left?"
Morinaga considered lying to Tomoe and telling him that his brother was fine and dandy to make him feel better but he knew that wouldn't help matters any. And lying to someone as kind as Tomoe would make Morinaga feel like the worst type of person there was. "Yeah, he was. Tomoe-kun, your brother was crying when I came in."
"Nii-san," Tomoe breathed out before breaking out into audible sobs.
Morinaga wished he were with his senpai's little brother to help comfort him in some way. He wasn't too sure how he could go about doing that but hearing such miserable sounds coming through his phone pulled at his heart. Morinaga was about to speak when he heard the low rumblings of another voice speaking to Tomoe. A moment later, Kurokawa came on.
"Hello, Morinaga-san."
"Hello, Kurokawa-san. Is Tomoe-kun okay? I didn't mean to upset him."
"No, it's not you. It's this whole...issue with his brother. It hasn't been going well, you know? Tatsumi-san is dead set against us going."
"I know what his brother feels is very important to Tomoe-kun."
"I don't know what to do, Morinaga-san. He just won't accept us. He won't accept me. Nothing I do can convince him that I'm not some evil demon hell-bent on taking advantage of his little brother. How do you showcase the love in your heart to someone who is blinded by irrational hatred?"
Morinaga could practically hear his senpai proclaiming his hatred for homos as he listened to Kurokawa's desperate questioning. "I don't know, Kurokawa-san. Although I sure wish I did."
"It's just...hard. Oh, one moment. Tatsumi-kun wants to talk to you."
"I'm sorry, Morinaga-san," Tomoe's voice came on. "I didn't mean to break down on you like that."
"It's okay, Tomoe-kun. Don't apologize."
"Was he really crying?"
"Yeah. I couldn't believe it. Your brother is so...-"
"Strong-minded. I know. He takes after our mother."
"Your mother? Not your father?"
Tomoe let out a light chuckle. "Our father? No, far from it. They're almost complete opposites. Our father is more...how do I explain it...not Nii-san. Our mother was the parent with the iron fist. The things Nii-san says are straight from her mouth sometimes."
"Even about you moving with Kurokawa-san?"
"No...she-she would have been okay with it. She would always tell us that the only thing that came before pride was love. Whether it's family or the love of your life, do anything and everything for them with no thoughts to how it makes you look to everyone else."
"So why does Senpai hate homos so much?"
"I honestly don't know. I've tried to get him to explain it to me but, with him, it's all stone walls and brick doors. He doesn't let anyone in. Our mother would be hurt by the way he's behaving right now."
"I wish that I had met her," Morinaga replied before he realized what he had just said. "Oh! I mean-I'm sorry, Tomoe-kun! I didn't mean to-."
"It's okay, Morinaga-san. I wish she had met a lot of people, too. Especially Kurokawa-san. She would have liked the both of you. I know she would have."
Morinaga's reply was cut off at the sound of the lab door being opened and shut. He turned to see Senpai enter looking reasonably pulled together with his face dry and his hair pulled back.
"Oi. I come back and find you yakking away on the phone like there isn't any work to be done. What the hell is wrong with you, Morinaga?"
"Uh-S-Senpai, I was just...I was-."
The other man rolled his eyes at Morinaga's stammering and strode forward. With a swift swipe, he snatched Morinaga's phone out of his hands and ignored the dark-haired man's cry of protest at his actions.
"Listen, whoever the hell you are," Souichi snarled into the device. "I have a very important review next week and I would really appreciate it if you didn't distract my idiot assistant with whatever useless problems you may be having right now, okay?" Souichi's grimace slowly faded as his light eyes widened in surprise. "Tomoe?"
"Senpai, may I have my phone back please?" Morinaga asked but was promptly ignored as Souichi pushed past him and began to whirlwind around the lab while shouting about winged devils and their love for American food.
Morinaga sighed in defeat and sank onto a stool. Placing his head on his hand, he stared off vacantly as his thoughts tumbled around him. He recalled what Kurokawa has asked him over the phone about showcasing love in the face of hatred. How could Morinaga possibly offer an answer when he himself was drowning in a similar situation?
He knew that Senpai hated homosexuals. He knew this but a flame of hope had been ignited within him when Tomoe had come out with Kurokawa. Senpai despised their relationship and made life a living hell for poor Kurokawa but he didn't refuse them in the way that Morinaga's family had basically disowned him when his relationship with Masaki had been found out. Despite what Kurokawa thought, Morinaga believed that Senpai had already accepted Tomoe being gay and Kurokawa abeing his lover. It was the acceptance in itself that Senpai was having difficulty dealing with. For a person who supposedly possessed strong beliefs and morals against homosexuality to accept such a situation at face value would confuse anyone. Senpai couldn't understand why he had accepted his own little brother being gay and Morinaga knew that must scare the other man severely. What could be the only coping mechanism for such fear for a person like Senpai but to lash out at those around him?
Morinaga clung tightly to the notion that if the older man could accept Tomoe being gay then he could accept the fact that his lab assistant had been in love with him for the past four years with no sign of falling out anytime soon. Maybe if Senpai saw how sincere and deep his love for him was then he would give Morinaga the one chance he needed to prove that no one could treat the long-haired man better than him. No one.
"Here," Souichi broke into Morinaga's thoughts as he handed his phone back to him.
Morinaga pocketed the device and studied the other man carefully for any visible clues that could help him understand what he was feeling. When all he saw was Senpai walking away to measure out liquids he decided that the only way to approach this was the suicidally direct way.
He stood up and strode over to stand next to his senpai who was bent over with light brown eyes glued to the liquid measurements. "Senpai, he really is a good guy, you know. You just need to give him a chance."
"I don't know what you're going on about, Morinaga, so just shut up."
"No, you need to realize that Tomoe is old enough to make his own decisions and to be with who he wants to be with. He loves Kurokawa-san for a reason and if he wants to move to America with him then you should be supportive of that."
"I don't recall asking for your opinion. None of this is any of your business so stay the fuck out of it."
"No! No matter what you consider me, Senpai, I consider you a friend and the same goes for Tomoe-kun and Kurokawa-san. I won't just stand by and do nothing when I hear the both of you crying on the same day!"
"I wasn't crying!"
"Oh, give it up, Senpai! I'm not stupid and neither are you so quit behaving like an idiot! Tomoe-kun needs your support. Do you really want him to leave on such a bad note with you?"
"He's not leaving!" Souichi screeched and threw down a flask on the table where it shattered causing liquid to spread over the surface.
"S-Senpai, what-?" Morinaga halted when he met Senpai's enraged eyes before the other man gazed down at the mess of glass and fluid.
"Damn it, Morinaga," Souichi muttered as he grabbed a nearby cloth and began to soak up the spill.
Morinaga hesitated in thought before deciding on his words. He had seen something in Senpai's eyes in that moment of fury. It was due to years of looking at his own self in the mirror countless times that he was able to identify it underneath the anger. Senpai was afraid.
"Senpai, this isn't about Kurokawa-san, is it?" Morinaga said to which the other man replied nothing. "Answer me please."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Yes, you do."
Souichi ignored Morinaga's statement and continued to pound at the cloth causing Morinaga to both sigh in annoyance and wince in fear that shards of glass would cut through his senpai's unprotected skin.
"Senpai? Senpai, will you answer me?"
Morinaga reached out and snatched the rag from Senpai's hands disregarding the tiny pricks of glass on his palm and tossed it to the side. He grabbed a hold of the smaller man's shoulders and turned him to face himself.
"What is this really about, Senpai, because I know that you don't hate Kurokawa-san this much. You couldn't possibly. He hasn't given you any real reason to."
"Let me go, Morinaga."
"No. What are you afraid of?"
"Let me go, Morinaga."
"No. What are you afraid of?"
"Let me go."
"No."
"Let me go!"
"No!"
"I can't do it okay!" Souichi smacked Morinaga's grip off of him and clamped a trembling hand over his own eyes. "You fucking moron, I can't do it! I don't know the first thing about raising a girl and I don't know how the fuck to keep a house clean or how to feed her right and the old man is never around to help out. He-he's always chasing after damn bugs like they're more important than his own fucking kids. I don't know how to be a father! A-and that kid...that kid won't listen! He wants to just leave with that moron and what am I supposed to do when he's gone? He can't just go and leave m...I can't...I can't..."
Morinaga was struck utterly speechless. He had no idea what to say in a situation that involved an insecure and terrified Senpai. Didn't his love realize that he had been raising Kanako lately and that she was growing up to be a wonderful person? That she was already so smart and content? And couldn't he see how much his family loved him not as a replacement father but as an older brother?
"Senpai," Morinaga called out as he took the man's shaking hand and pulled it slowly from his face. Souichi instantly turned his head and hid behind the long fringe of his hair. Morinaga tried to locate his eyes but Senpai seemed intent on avoiding him and sticking to the floor instead. "Senpai, look at me, please."
Morinaga marveled at the man's stubborn behavior when he continued to refuse and lightly grabbed his chin. He turned Senpai's face towards his and felt his heart shudder when he saw the tears falling out of those beautiful eyes that he loved so much. He had thought hearing Senpai crying took a toll on his heart but to see it up close and right in front of him nearly threatened to stop his heart altogether. It was safe to say that watching the tears stream out of his love without so much as a whimper or sniff was more breaking for him than having Senpai scream or cry out. It was bordering on a defeatist attitude and that was nothing like his senpai at all.
"Senpai, you're wrong."
"What?"
"You're wrong about everything. You do know how to raise a healthy and happy girl and your father does not love bugs more than his own children whatever that could possibly mean because how could he? You and Kanako-chan and Tomoe-kun are some of the most amazing and wonderful people that I have ever had the great fortune of meeting. You aren't their father and they know that. They love you for you, Senpai."
"But how could he leave and-."
"Senpai, Tomoe-kun isn't leaving you. He trusts you completely. He knows that his little sister will be loved and taken care of and the same goes for you as well. Kanako-chan is a great girl and she'll be looking out for you just as much as you will be looking out for her. You don't think Tomoe-kun is worried about the two of you? But he knows that you'll be fine and that's why he feels that it's okay for him to go. This is a great opportunity for him and you know that."
"I know. But that Kurokawa doesn't have to go with him."
"Senpai, you know as well as I do that he does. Your brother loves him and he loves Tomoe-kun as well. They'll take care of each other."
"But he-."
"No. Tomoe-kun trusts you enough to move to America. Will you trust him enough to let him go?"
Souichi's gaze bore through Morinaga but the dark-haired man had the feeling that the brown eyes weren't seeing him. A few minutes passed by filled with amicable contemplation before his senpai slowly nodded as much to himself as to the younger man.
"You know, Senpai, I'm sorry to say that the only thing that you may be right about is that you don't know how to keep a house clean because you don't clean up broken glass with bare skin and a microfiber cloth."
Souichi let out a snort of laughter and smacked Morinaga lightly on the arm. "Idiot."
Morinaga grinned in return before the expression fell away and was replaced by determination. He stepped up to the proverbial cliff and took a deep breath. "Senpai, you're also wrong about another thing."
"What?"
"You aren't going to be doing this alone because I'm here and I have no intentions of ever leaving you."
"Morinaga, what-."
"Senpai, I love you."
And, with those four words, Morinaga jumped.
