"Did you...did you really kill younglings?" Padmé had asked him, broaching the subject they were discussing before Obi-Wan's interruption.
He leaned back in the co-pilot's seat and gazed up at the stars that turned to white lines as they jumped to hyperspace. She'd never seen him so exhausted before.
"Anakin?" She asked. "I won't be angry. I just want to know."
Anakin nodded. "I took my men with me. There were three hundred and twenty seven of them."
She winced. "You counted?"
He shrugged. "You wouldn't?"
It should have shocked her, horrified her beyond all belief and confirmed to her all the ludicrous things that Obi-Wan had told her...but it didn't. She knew that it was disgusting. She knew that what he'd done was unforgivable. But she didn't feel it.
She didn't feel anything. No rising feeling of nausea in her gut, no twist of shame, no judgment or condemnation. No feeling at all. How could she not at least be embarrassed for him? Of herself for staying with him? Why all these things that she knew to be terrible couldn't get her to feel terrible?
Then there was that Muun in the dark cloak. The image of him sitting over her as she woke was practically burned into the back of eye sockets. Anakin said that he saved her life. Somehow, she wasn't sure. Something had changed inside, and it was something so radical and so fundamental that she wasn't even sure how to describe it.
"Why did you do it?" She asked.
Anakin pursed his lips. "They were traitors. They had to die."
Padmé looked up at him and asked, without the slightest bit of sarcasm or insincerity in her voice, "Is that what you really believe?"
"I had to find out if he was telling the truth." There was no shame or guilt in his voice, just a candidness that made the admission more disturbing. "If the Dark Side was stronger."
"And?"
He nodded while staring off into the distance, eyes wide as saucers. "Palpatine has made a terrible mistake."
"Oh?" Padmé frowned. There were a hundred things Palpatine had done that she abhored, but she couldn't see how he had made any mistakes, at least in relation to pursuing his own goals. After all, he'd just declared himself Emperor and crushed all his opposition in the process.
"He thought that he could show me this power and then control me." Anakin made a fist, the muscles in his forearms rippling with barely controlled anger. "He won't be stronger than me for long. I will destroy him."
Stray thoughts told her to back away, to recoil, for this was the same instability she'd seen on Mustafar. In his eyes was the twinge of madness that overtook him just before he saw Obi-Wan emerge from his little hiding place aboard the star skiff. That was the face he made before he started choking her. He had turned to the Dark Side and it was obvious, so apparent, so complete that now even she felt it.
But that safety that had been in the back of her mind then was gone now. She didn't want to turn away, or run, or hide. She wasn't afraid, and she wasn't caught up in some phase of denial. The good and kind and noble man that she had met years ago and come to cherish and love was gone. This wasn't her husband. She knew that.
And she didn't care, because this creature that wore her husband's face excited her. She wasn't repulsed by his darkness. She wasn't frightened by it. She was drawn to it. She wanted to embrace him. She wanted to put her hands on him, to tell him that she would never leave him, that she didn't judge him for all these terrible things he did. He did them for a reason. She understood, she would tell him. Everything has a cost, everything has a price, and he had paid the steepest kind. She loved him for that.
If there was anything that should have frightened her, it was the fact that she had done all these things without even pausing to process what she was saying, what she was thinking, what she was feeling. It was automatic, like instinct.
As she said these things, he looked upon her with such wide-eyed astonishment that he might have been truly seeing her for the first time. He kissed her and told her that everything was going to work out.
.
It was near sunset when Padmé Amidala and Anakin Skywalker arrived on Naboo. They were permitted to dock their J-type star skiff in the same large hangar where they had fired the first shots in an attempt to take back Theed, thirteen years back. The wall of the right side of the hangar was covered with a large stone relief commemorating the battle where Naboo's freedom was won. The carving of Padmé Amidala stood behind Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn, small royal blaster pistol leveled at the opposition of droids. The declination of the sun left the entire mural cloaked in shadow.
Queen Apailana, Governor Sio Bibble and a troupe of handmaidens were waiting for them.
"Senator Amidala," Apailana said, dipping her head slightly as Padmé walked down the boarding ramp. "And Master Skywalker! The gods are good that you are still live! We've feared the worst for your safety, and for Master Kenobi's since this...terrible announcement came down from the Chancellor."
"Master Kenobi has been killed," Anakin said without a change in expression.
Sio Bibble's expression turned acrid and Apailana saddened. "This is a tragedy," the Queen said. "Master Kenobi was a hero to our people. He helped save us from the oppression of the Trade Federation."
"He was a good man and a great friend," Padmé said sorrowfully. Yes, but what would you know about the 'oppression' of the Trade Federation? Padmé mused. You're barely thirteen. You hadn't even been born yet when that happened.
She bowed to her successor, though more out of respect for the office that had once been hers than for any personal respect for Apailana herself. Anakin followed suit.
"How are our people taking the changes in Coruscant?" Padmé asked as they started to walk out of the hangar and towards the main palace complex.
"A great unease has fallen upon our people, Senator," Sio Bibble said, while shaking his head. "Many of them are shocked by the events on Coruscant and news of this...Order 66."
"Are Jedi really being exterminated?" Apailana asked.
"The Jedi Temple was sacked," Anakin said. "Even apprentices and younglings weren't spared."
"Oh, god," Apailana covered her mouth, tears welling from her eyes. Like so many born during the baby boom after the Trade Federation Invasion, she looked upon the Jedi as her personal heroes. Padmé had seen enough of the Clone Wars to know that they were heroes. Her sadness could have-should have-been contagious, but Padmé just looked upon it in with mute interest.
"Master Skywalker," Sio Bibble said, "you were able to escape?"
Anakin looked to Padmé, then back to the Governor, seeming to get the gist of what she wanted from him, as he began spinning a tale rather than tell the horrible truth. "Yes," he said, "I got away as they set the temple ablaze. Senator Amidala helped me escape from the planet afterwards."
"Were there others?" Apailana asked.
Anakin frowned. "I was...alone."
"Could there have been other survivors?"
Anakin's frown deepened, then he gave a nod that could've been interpreted as either numb or callous. "Yes, there could have been, I suppose."
"This is an atrocity!" Sio Bibble declared. "I refuse to believe that the Jedi were a part of any plot to take over the Republic. Even if a few isolated individuals were to be involved, that sort of retaliation by the Chancellor is completely uncalled for."
"He calls himself Emperor, now," Apailana said.
Sio Bibble shook his head, the look of extreme distaste on his face. "Another reason why our people are uneasy and unhappy. They cannot believe that Palpatine, who had served us faithfully for so long, would take power this way!" Bibble's voice rose violently, laced with an anger that only a hard-nosed partisan like him could muster, "This whole declaration of a new order is a sham, it's the destruction of our democracy!"
Yes, yes it was. It was all that, the destruction of everything Padmé had ever believed, everything she had previously raised her hand to fight for. Yet she could no longer muster the same anger, the same righteous indignation that still burned so fiercely, even in the heart of a man so old as Bibble. Where had her emotion gone? Did she even believe anymore?
"Everyone in Theed has seen the video footage from the Senate by now, including Emperor Palpatine's speech inducing a New Order," Apailana said, "many still can't believe it. I can't believe it. Is that really how it happened, Padmé? Did all those Senators really cheer?"
Padmé looked at Anakin. She knew that her husband preferred order. Dissent like this left a terrible taste in his mouth and could provoke him to some pretty sour moods. His mood now had yet to reach a tipping point, though. He was just between bored and annoyed with this little masquerade.
"It happened exactly as it appeared on the holonet," Padmé said.
To her credit, Apailana didn't despair. Her features only hardened with a defiance that Padmé knew to be all too familiar. "Then someone is going to have to rise up and stop him." She turned to Anakin. "Master Skywalker, I know you've always stood tall against evil, and I know that you won't allow this atrocity to continue. I just want you to know that I stand with you. Naboo stands with you, and all the Jedi. We can bring this murderer to justice."
Padmé sensed the darkness upwelling in him again, and she could've slapped the queenling for being so presumptuous. Anakin's expression turned icy when he considered the young queen for a beat. "I assure you, Your Highness, Palpatine will not reign for long."
Apailana considered for a second, then beckoned for them to follow her after she dismissed Governor Bibble and about half of her handmaidens.
.
They went deep into the bowels of the Theed palace, beyond several sets of trap doors that even Padmé wasn't familiar with, and into a basement domicile she'd never seen before. The living area consisted of close to a dozen rooms linked to a large, open common area with vaulted ceilings held up by tall stone pillars. Apailana led them into the first room, where a horrendously injured man lay, tended to medical droids.
"Senator Amidala," Apailana said, "I'm not sure if you've met Master Garen Muln before, but he is a contemporary of Obi-Wan Kenobi and a good friend."
"What happened to him?" Padmé asked before Anakin could say anything. She felt his anger and knew that stalling was the best way to control it for the time being.
"We don't know. We found him like this aboard a derelict LAAT gunship floating in a wreckage on our third moon, Rori. I don't know how he could have survived up there."
"Jedi can be very resilient," Anakin said.
"Yes, yes they can," Apailana said, "but our droids haven't been able to stabilize him and we're not sure how much longer he can survive. I know that the Jedi have special healing techniques...I was wondering if you could do something to help him, Master Anakin..."
Padmé gave Anakin a cold glare, a tried her best to mentally insist that he control himself and act appropriately. He assented with a burdened nod then asked them to clear the room. Once they were outside in the lobby, Padmé grabbed Apailana by the arm and pulled her aside.
"You do realize the tremendous risk you're taking, right?" Padmé asked.
Apailana yanked her arm away and looked up at Padmé with a mixture of shock and incredulity. A couple of the handmaidens had almost stepped up and intervened. No one-not even someone as respected as Amidala-could be allowed to handle the Queen in such a manner. The way Apailana caressed her arm went to show just how roughly Padmé had handled her.
"We have to fight Palpatine. We have to stand up for what's right!"
"Palpatine is more powerful than you realize. Have you thought of what would happen if you gave him cause to come after you?"
Apailana straightened. "I'm not afraid of him or his empire-"
"For yourself, maybe. But what about your people? Our people? What do you think will happen when he removes you from the throne? Another elected monarch, that respects liberty and the constitution? No, he'll replace you with someone that would make the Trade Federation occupation look like a circus!"
"The Jedi saved us." Apailana's expression hardened and Padmé wondered if she was so obstinate when she was a teenager, reigning as queen. "Of all people, you should know that best! We owe it to them, to protect them as they protected us."
Padmé bristled beneath a mask of reservation. It would seem that each monarch reigning in her wake seemed to be less competent than the last, cumulating in this...child. Padmé could've retained the throne years ago when her second term ended. The Naboo and Gungan alike would have supported an amendment to the constitution and allow her to rule in perpetuity. She should have allowed them to. Her popularity was such that she still could...
"You have to think about our people, Apailana," Padmé said icily. "Are you really willing to leverage their suffering that way? I know that you're too young to have a family, but if you did, would they appreciate you gambling with their lives like this?"
"This isn't any more of a risk than what you did!" The young queen was getting angry now. "You took in Master Skywalker and smuggled him off Coruscant, remember?"
"That's different."
"How?"
Her jaw clamped she was starting to get angry herself. "He is my family."
Apailana frowned and traded a look with one of her handmaidens before turning back to Padmé. Her eyes invariably fell upon Padmé's bulging stomach, then widened with realization. "He's..." Even after a beat, Padmé still felt the sense of shock and confusion spilling from Apailana. "He's the father?"
Padmé's annoyance only increased, as she was reminded of the lower back pain that carrying the babies had afflicted her with. "Are you planning to hide more Jedi here?"
The queenling nodded. "Any Jedi would be welcome here."
"Okay," Padmé said after a beat. "But you need to keep me informed. Palpatine still trusts me and I can use that trust to protect you-maybe get special immunities and protections for Naboo and keep them from putting an Imperial garrison here or assigning an Imperial governor...but I need to know exactly what's going on down here. Do you understand?"
The queenling nodded. "Of course, Senator."
Padmé let out a breath of relief then turned as Anakin walked out of the room, his face sullen.
"Master Muln has joined the Force," he said.
Apailana looked down. "I'm sorry, we did everything we could to keep him stable before you arrived."
"You did nothing wrong. I...just arrived late." Anakin shook his head and looked away. He appeared to be so sad and so wounded, but Padmé knew better. "Please, excuse me."
He walked off, then Padmé gave the queen and her handmaidens a tired look before turning to go after him. She followed him up the stairs and back through the passages of secret doors. Once they were outside on a balcony overlooking the Virdugo Plunge, and beyond an earshot of the Queen or any of her handmaidens, Padmé pulled on his arm and gave him an expectant look.
"I was merciful," Anakin said. "I could have made it painful. But Garen was a decent man. He was on the wrong side of things, but still, a decent man. He did not deserve pain."
She could have blanched at the cavalier admission. She didn't.
"We should report this to the Emperor," Anakin said. "The Queen is harboring terrorists."
"No," Padmé said firmly. "We should wait. Apailana plans to hide more Jedi here."
Anakin folded his hands, then flashed a sinister smile. He put his arm around her and she leaned into the crook of his shoulder. They watched the waterfall for a time before walking to the transit blister in the lower palace. Padmé requisitioned an airspeeder from the Royal Security Force and began the trek to the mountains and the isolated village where Padmé's parents and sister had lived in seclusion since the Clone Wars began.
