I can't work on this a lot. I have a sister that needs/wants on the computer too. I will try to type some of this every day since I have study hall 4 out of 6 days. But I may have homework, too. So my priorities come first. So, I will try as much as possible to write something every day, but sometimes I'm just busy with school. This year I don't have a lot of homework, so I will have more downtime. By the way, in addition to my Twilight obsession, I am also obsessed with Taylor Swift's songs, and she came out with her new visoe for Love Story - you should check it out. It's great!! Sorry, I'm rambling...on with the story

I decided that I should do something. Anything that would distract me. So I drove back to my house in Morton, which was just far enough away that I wouldn't be reminded of my past, - not that that made a difference - yet also close enough that I could visit my mother and Seth. Remarkably, Mom and Charlie have struck up a liking for each other. I couldn't see what she liked about him. I suppose he is kind of like Dad, but he was his friend and I couldn't understand why she doesn't see the betrayal behind being with her. Maybe I was just depressed that she, too had found someone, and I was left in the dust. So now everyone who wanted to be in love is in love: Jacob, Jared, Quil, Paul and Mom and Charlie.

I didn't include Sam in that group. He hadn't wanted to be in love. He thought he was in love. So did I. I remembered he kept avoiding me like there was something wrong with me. Then, he came over one day to talk to me. Emily was there, too and boom he was in love. With her. I could tell by the way he looked at her. I couldn't believe it. When he told me he found someone else, I knew exactly who that "someone else" was. She acted like there was nothing wrong about it. She knew he was with me, but she didn't know that I knew he was with her now. She pretended that everything was fine. What a joke. Everything was not fine. I was exploding inside knowing that he didn't love me anymore. I just couldn't understand why this happened. He was the one avoiding me. Now he's just miraculously in love with Emily.

I was pulled back to the present time when I realized the movie had ended. That was quick. I guess I was too wrapped up in my reminiscing that I missed all but half an hour of the movie. I took the disc out and put it back in its case. Then I walked outside and watched the sun fall behind the trees in the distance. I live here by myself. My closest neighbors are about about half a mile away. I have a small expanse of field about two acres long as my front yard, and then there is an enroachment of trees at the end of the field. It was a pleasant place, a quiet place. My house was just a tiny thing, but it was enough for me. No one else was living here, so what was the point in having a big house?

When you walk through the doorway, you were in the kitchen. The kitchen had cream-colored cabinets and countertops. The weren't many cabinets, but there were enough to keep a few things in there. I had a fridge and a stove, both an odd cream color from beign so old. They came with the house. There was a small, two-person table connected to the wall. It was white and it had two chairs that were pretty shabby-looking, but I didn't care. When my mom first came here, she looked at the cahirs and said I needed new ones. I liked them. Sure, they were old, but must have some kind of past. I couldn't throw them out just because they were someone's leftovers. They still had a chance to be loved. Just like me. I was Sam's leftovers, and I still wanted to be loved. Here I go again.

After the kitchen is a little hallway. On the right side was a living room. That room simply had a television set with a DVD player and a little sofa that was light blue that matched the room. On the left side was the bathroom. Nothing special there, just the usual necessities.

The second door on the right was my bedroom. It had a very light brown color. It was like that old country pretty brown color. My bed was queen-sized, even though no one else was ever in it. The comforter was beige withe white and cream stripes in it. There was a small chair in there too. I never used it, but it was there for decoration. I had a dresser and a full length mirror in there as well. Hanging on the wall was a picture of my family. Dad, with his arm around Mom and Seth and I were below them. I remember that day Seth and I were fighting the whole day, and Mom was so stressed about getting this picture perfect that she almost had a breakdown. When you look at this picture, you can't see Mom's stress or my discontentment with Seth. Dad was the only reason we had a good picture. He told us that we could pull ourselves together for just a few minutes and we would have a nice picture. He was right.

The second door on the left was a large closet for a small house. It was only a little smaller than the bathroom, so I kept blankets and movies and other things I haven't unpacked yet. Right next to the closet, the third door on the left, was a spare bedroom. I don't have enough money to make it a guest bedroom, so now it's kind of like an office. It has a computer that actually works pretty well, and it isn't too slow. That sits on a desk along with a keyboard and a tower. The chair doesn't match anywhere else in the house, so i kept it in here. It was the chair Dad used to sit on when we had dinner together. I know it's silly to keep such a thing, but it's my little reminder of him. The day we found out what happened, I was at home watching TV. Mom had said some snide comment and I just started shaking. I was so furious at her. I can't even remember what she said now. Then I felt the pain. Everywhere. Mom called for Dad, and when he saw me, his eyes were huge with horror. Then he clutched at his chest, gasped and fell. A heart attack, the doctor had said. Mom was split between two dilemnas: Help me or help dad. She helped Dad. After all, she thought I was just really mad at her. It wasn't that. I was writhing in pain. I ran outside into the forest and I burst through my skin. I heard voices and I knew what had happened, only I didn't want to believe it. Dad died that day. And I was changed. A werewolf, they called it. Sam was one too. I wanted to hurt him. I didn't want to be in his head. I began to worry about Dad. Now, when I look back at all of this, I wish that I would have worried about him rather than be worrying about what was happening to me. I guess you never realize who you have and how much you love them until they're gone.