AN
This is dedicated to the lovely and talented Sarah Paulson, my all time favorite AHS actress. I wish you the happiest of birthdays on this December 17th!
Disclaimer-I own nothing.
Something Real
Chapter 2- Happy Death Day
Summary- In which John has a conversation with Sally about her death.
John exited his room and wandered down to the bar, deep in thought. He and March had just finished cataloguing the parts he'd taken from Andy Hahn, his former partner. He had no regrets about killing him; the guy had practically been asking for it for years now, but he couldn't get one of the last things he'd said to him out of his mind.
'Sally McKenna. She jumped out of a window at the Cortez in '94. She's been dead for more than twenty years, John.'
Of course he'd figured out that his lover was a ghost some time ago, but they'd never discussed the how or the when. John never would've guessed that she'd be the type to commit suicide. After a five-year relationship, he felt he should know more about her than he did. John resolved to talk to her about the matter.
Upon arriving at the bar, John was perplexed by Sally's absence. Since she hadn't shown up at his room he'd been sure that she would be down here. But all he saw was Liz and Iris sharing a drink together.
"Have either of you ladies seen my girl around lately?" John asked, taking a seat across from them.
The women shared an amused look.
"I'm sorry, but which one would you be referring to?" Liz asked with a straight face.
Iris elbowed her pointedly but couldn't keep in a small giggle.
John frowned at them. "Ha ha, very funny. I've got nothing to do with my ex-wife anymore. I meant Sally. She's not in any of her usual places."
"Hmm. You'd be surprised how hard it is to find a ghost who doesn't want to be found," remarked Liz.
"What? Why wouldn't she want to be found?"
Iris lowered her gaze to the counter-top guiltily. "Well... Today is kind of the anniversary of her death here."
"Is that so?"
John wondered why the older woman looked so guilty. He knew that she shared a sort of frienemies relationship with Sally, but there wasn't much you could do when a person decided to end their own life.
"Do you know where I can find her?"
Liz took a sip from her drink. "Oh, honey, you probably walked right past her."
"What?"
"Let's just say you'll probably find her somewhere near that big bay window on your floor."
"The one down the hall from my room?"
"You got it."
"Okay. Thanks ladies."
John got up and made his way slowly back the way he'd came. He didn't see how he could've missed Sally if she really had been at that window all this time. Could she choose to be invisible when she wanted or something?
"Sally?" John called out as he emerged into his hallway. He glanced towards the window but saw nobody. "Sally, where are you?"
"Right here, baby." Just like that, she shimmered into sight wearing her signature cheetah print coat, purple mini-dress, black choker, cameo, torn fishnets and heels standing in front of the window where previously the space had been empty. "What do you need?"
"You," John answered simply, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her to him as he joined her by the window.
"Aw... Aren't you sweet." She turned and pecked him on his jaw halfheartedly.
John was struck by the listlessness he saw in her eyes. "Are you okay, baby doll?"
Sally shrugged. "Oh, sure. Just peachy."
John didn't believe her for a second but he decided not to pursue the matter any further for now. He wasn't the type of person who tiptoed around people and he figured after he said what he needed to say, she would end up revealing her true feelings anyway. "Well, alright then. So, before I killed him, Hahn revealed some news about you that really shocked me."
Sally raised her eyebrows as she turned in his arms to face him. "Oh, really?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact. How come you never told me you committed suicide?"
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me. Why would you ever take your own life? I didn't think you were that kind of person. Things must have been really bad, but there is always another alternative-"
"What in the hell are you talking about?!"
"You! You killed yourself by jumping out of a window at this hotel-!"
Sally wrenched herself violently from John's grasp. "JUMPING? HOW DARE YOU! I WAS PUSHED!"
John's mouth fell open in surprise. "What?"
"That's right, Mr. Detective! So sorry to contradict you, but seeing how it's my story and all, I think I know a bit more about it than you or your source!"
John was floored. "Oh my God... I had no idea-"
"No, you didn't! Please tell me why in the hell I would willingly throw myself from a sixth story window?" Sally demanded.
John lowered his gaze to the floor. "You're right, of course. I'm so sorry I upset you, sweetheart. I didn't mean anything by it. I knew something didn't sound right about the whole story. I guess I just wanted to hear it from you."
"Well, now you've heard it," Sally replied bitterly, stubbornly avoiding his attempt to reach out and touch her.
They spent the next few minutes in silence, staring down through the window at the dingy, littered alley below.
"Look," John spoke up finally. "I'm sorry for being so insensitive before, but I really do want to hear everything. You've always been there for me to listen to my troubles and guide me through, and I'd like to do the same for you."
Sally sighed deeply. "Well, okay then. You're not completely forgiven, but I guess it's no big secret to anyone else but you anyway so..." She trailed off, hesitating and looking uncertain. "Well, where to start?"
"Anywhere you'd like," John told her softly, inching closer to her.
Sally lit her cigarette. "Fine. In case you haven't figured it out yet, this is where it happened, at this very window. I landed exactly right down there in that alley." She indicated a particular dirty patch of ground below. "What can I say. It hurt like hell, and I wasn't lucky enough to die instantly on impact. I felt everything. My ribs broke and punctured my lungs. At the same time, my collarbone was shattered and I finally broke my neck. I still have the marks as a constant reminder..." Sally broke off as she traced the noticeable bruises and scars over her chest and neck.
John covered her hand with his, stroking it consolingly. Gently pulling it away and entertwining it with his, John leaned over and covered each and every mark with warm, tender kisses. Sally shivered, overcome with emotion and fell into his arms, her body shaking with silent grief. John hugged her tightly to him, stroking her hair and rubbing her back in soothing circles.
When Sally finally regained control of herself and pulled back an arm's length, John's shirt was wet with her tears and his expression was thunderous with rage. "Who? Who did it?"
"What?" Sally sniffled.
John grit his teeth. "Who? Pushed? You?"
"Oh. It was Iris."
John's arms dropped to his sides in shock. He'd been ready to charge out and murder someone for Sally's injustice, no matter who or where they might be. But he hadn't expected it to be someone he knew and liked for the most part, and now he found himself at a loss. He needed to try and understand before he jumped to crazy conclusions. "Iris? But, why? Why would she do that to you?"
Sally sneered. "Oh, probably because she blamed me for the death of her prettyboy, manwhore of a son."
"Wait, you mean Donovan?"
"That's right. We came to this hotel to get high. We ended up down the hall in your room as a matter of fact. Anyway, we took the same shit and I was more than fine. But I guess his body couldn't handle it and he ODed. But that wasn't my fault. I told him not to try and keep up with me. Iris barged in on our little private party and lost her shit when she saw he was dead. I walked out and left her to her grief. I mean really, was I supposed to stay there with her? It had nothing to do with me anymore. Like I said, I was fine but still a bit woozy, so I stopped at this open window to get a bit of fresh air before I left." Sally grimaced. "Little did I know that the same crazy, old lady would pop up behind me and shove me out of it to my death. I even managed to turn my body in midair to look back at her in shocked horror which, in hindsight, couldn't have helped my landing."
It all made sense now. Iris's guilty looks earlier and Sally's bitterness and dislike towards the other woman. Sally wasn't the being bitter just to be bitter type. She only treated a person coldly once they gave her a reason. And so many people had given her reasons: Looking down on her because of the life she'd led or her choice of clothes. But this... This was much worse than all that. This was unforgivable. Iris had to pay.
John was seeing red. There was a persistent ringing in his ears and his vision was blurring and at the same time narrowing. He only got this way before committing a major act of violence such as taking a life. He'd found his next offender. Thou shalt not kill indeed. But Iris had, and now he would claim her head for it. For justice. For Sally. Resolutely, John turned to leave.
"John, no! Wait!" Sally grabbed hold of him but he continued to stalk down the hallway, dragging her with him until she planted her feet and forced them to a halt. She moved around in front of him. "John, look at me."
Sally had known something was wrong when a full minute had passed and John hadn't offered up a word since the ending of her tragic tale. Teering her eyes from the spot she'd landed so painfully all those years before and glancing up, she caught a glimpse of him and knew instantly what was about to happen. Violence. She could see it in the tensing of his shoulders and straightening of his posture. His face had smoothed out into an unreadable marble surface, his expression hard as granite or stone. His eyes turned to slits and she could practically see the smoke pouring from his ears. She'd seen it all before. They were the unmistakable signs that the sweet and caring outer-John was about to be replaced with the vicious monster lurking deep inside his soul.
Sally was more than touched that John had become so worked up with righteousness and protectiveness and was even willing to kill for her, but she couldn't allow it. There was a large part of Sally that really did hate Iris and wish horrible things to happen to her, but there was another smaller part of her that kind of enjoyed their constant bantering and bickering. It kept her afterlife entertaining and as sad as it was, it gave her something to look forward to. Besides all of that, Iris's death now would change nothing. She had to make John see that. She needed to talk him off of the ledge that he was so precariously perched on.
Sally placed her hands firmly on John's shoulders and shook him. "Snap out of it, John."
"She must pay."
"John, please..."
"Thou shalt not kill."
"Come back to me, baby. I know, but it's okay, really. Just-"
"I'll have her head."
"John, will you please just listen to me for one sec-!"
"Death is upon her."
Sally made a desperately risky decision. She slapped John hard across the face, causing him to jerk and slam her up against a wall. It had the desired effect though. John's eyes returned to normal and his expression cleared, though he looked confused and immediately released his tight grip on Sally, who slid to the floor.
"I'm sorry," John apologized as he helped her to her feet. "But why did you do that? Why did you stop me?"
Sally was crying again. "Because, killing Iris wouldn't have made any difference, John. I'd still be dead. Still be trapped here forever. And still be miserable." She smiled tearfully. "Except, of course, when I'm with you. Which isn't nearly as often as I'd want it to be."
"Oh, Sally..." John took her in his arms once more, feeling guilty and drained. She was right about everything, as usual. He didn't spend nearly enough time with her. But that would be changing very soon. A part of him still wanted to kill Iris, but he saw no point in it anymore. He could claim that he'd become all fired up over justice and righteousness, but they both knew that the true reason was wrapped securely in his embrace. He'd wanted to avenge Sally and make her happy. But if Iris's death wouldn't accomplish that than there was no longer a point in going through with it.
"Are you absolutely sure you don't want me to kill her?" John asked.
"I'm sure," Sally replied, her voice muffled in his shirt. "Like I said, it would change nothing. And let's face it, we've both sort of grown fond of the old broad."
"Yeah, but I'll never be able to look at her the same way again. To think that she really-"
"Could we PLEASE stop talking about this!" Sally burst out. "Please... No more."
"Of course, sweetheart. Anything you want," John told her as he rubbed her back.
"I just want to forget for a little while. Do you think you can help me with that, Detective?" Sally batted her eyelashes flirtatiously
"Whatever my lady needs, my lady gets." John lifted her in his arms and carried her to his bed, where they made passionate love.
Some time later they lay in the afterglow, their limbs hopelessly entangled. "How are you feeling now, doll?" John asked, softly kissing Sally's cheek.
"Oh, great. Really wonderful," she answered as she cuddled up even closer to him.
"Sally..." John warned her. "Tell the truth this time."
She sighed. "Fine. Being with you was as amazing and mind-blowing as usual, but I guess I'm still a little sad about my situation."
John frowned at her.
"Okay, more than a little sad. But it's par of the course today. I always feel extra crappy and depressed on my Death Day. It is a little better though now that your here with me..."
John nuzzled her neck. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"Don't let go. Just stay here with me."
"There's nowhere else I'd rather be."
"Promise me you won't leave me."
"I'll never really leave you, Sally. It's you and me, from now on."
They leaned in for a kiss. "One more thing. Tell me you love me."
"You know I do."
"Yes, but it's nice to hear. Especially now."
John gazed deep into her eyes. "I love you, Sally McKenna. More than I ever expected I would. More than you could ever know. You were absolutely right when you said there is nobody else quite like you. I know now that I can never be truly happy without you by my side."
Tears were pouring down Sally's face. "Oh, John... That was beautiful!"
"I meant every word."
As they began round two, Sally's heart was lighter than it had ever been. She was finally, for the moment at least, at peace with her death. Because in death, she had found a truer and stronger love that she had never had the privilege to know in life, and it was all she had ever wanted. To be loved.
Seven Years Later...
The day started as most others for her did; uneventfully. Time passed differently for the dead who never slept. The second the hands of the clock hit twelve Sally was at the window, staring out at the world forlornly from her prison, thinking about if onlys and what could have beens. So just another typical Death Day. Or so she'd thought.
Her fellow residents of the Cortez gave her half the day to brood and grieve in relative peace. Not even John dared to intrude on her solitude at first, until he could no longer stand the sight of her looking so melancholy and subsequently joined her, offering her his silent strength and warm presence. Life had been so much better since John died and became a ghost as well. For him to be voluntarily and eternally trapped with her had always been her greatest wish. Once that had happened, Sally had lost most reasons to be depressed and was significantly more cheerful, especially since Iris's gift of an iPhone. Her relationships with the others had improved and things were good. Today was one of the rare days out of the year that she allowed herself to fall back into despair and wallow in the constant pain that had been her life, full of addiction, rejection and abandonment.
But then she would look over at John and try to remind herself that all of that was no more. Things were different now, and she had reasons to be happy. Didn't she?
It was at that moment that Iris came walking into view towards them. "Oh, not you! Look, I know we're like friends now but I have the right to not want to see your face today," Sally protested.
"And you have every right to feel that way, but unfortunately I have specific orders to ignore what you say and bring you with me," Iris replied. "So, come on."
Sally turned to John. "You wouldn't happen to know what she's blabbering on about, would you?"
"Not at all," John denied, but then he turned to Iris and winked, making Sally frown at them both.
"What the hell-?"
"No more pondering and protesting, sweetie. Just come with us," Liz advised as she appeared next to Sally and took her arm. "I promise you won't regret it."
Despite herself, Sally was intrigued and so she allowed herself to be towed off by Iris and Liz after one last suspicious look back at her lover, who grinned at her mischievously. They ended up in the penthouse where Elizabeth and Ramona were waiting for them. After insisting that Sally needed a change of wardrobe, the four women finagled her into a sexy party dress before dragging her down to one of the hotel's more opulent ballrooms.
Sally was surprised to see the room decorated with crepe paper, streamers and balloons. Pulling one out of the air, she saw that HAPPY DEATH DAY was written on it in bold font and bright colors. All of the residents were assembled at various tables or milling about the dance floor including James March and Hazelle Evers and Will Drake floated in a corner hooking his phone up to a speaker.
"What... What is all this? What's going on here?" asked Sally breathlessly.
"Isn't it obvious, dear Sally," spoke up James. "It's a party."
"And it's all for you, beautiful," John declared, appearing and putting his arm around her.
"But... Why?"
"Well, because we all got sick and tired of seeing you mope around every year, darling," said Liz with a kind smile, her arm linked with Tristan's. "So we thought we might change that from now on."
Sally opened her mouth to protest, but Iris held up a hand to stop her. "Listen. We're not trying to say that your death and entrapment here is something to celebrate. As I told you before, you can't change the past. But we can work towards the future. This could be a new tradition. We're all gathered here today because we're a family, and you're one of us. We love you, Sally, and we want you to be happy. Even if you are a snarky pain-in-the-ass most of the time. This place just wouldn't be the same without you. So, we're celebrating the fact that you're here with us."
Sally was left speechless. Tears welled up in her eyes and quickly spilled over. Impulsively, Sally hugged Iris tightly. "Thank you..."
"Oh, honey, you're welcome," she assured with a soft smile as she returned the hug. "But the party was all John's idea."
Sally pulled back and turned to regard him. "Is that true?"
He kissed her forehead. "Guilty as charged. You know I'd do just about anything to make you happy. So, did it work?"
Sally laughed through her tears. "It more than worked, you big dope. Oh, thank you so much!"
They hugged and shared a kiss. Sally turned to face the room. "Thank you all. Really. You've made this day so much better."
"Aw... Come on everyone! Group hug for the Death Day girl!" Liz called out.
"Oh, that's not necessary-"
Everyone surrounded Sally and engulfed her, cutting off her weak protestations. Even James was dragged into the hug.
"Okay, okay! Break it up!" Sally ordered. "I love you guys, but enough of the sap. Let's party!"
A roar of approval went up from the crowd and Will started up the music. The rest of the night was spent dancing with John, laughing with her friends over alcohol and generally having a great time. Sally was over the moon. This chaotic mix of people had truly become her family, and she could finally say with complete sincerity that she was happy to be where she was. She had never felt so much love and appreciation in her entire existance. The feeling was more addicting than any drug could ever be. Sally thought fondly that she could get used to this. This was what it was all about. Nothing could bring her down off of this high. Happy Death Day to me, indeed!
AN
So, there you go. This turned out longer than it was supposed to and the party scene just ended up happening but I hope you liked it anyway. All hail the amazing, beautiful and wonderful Sarah Paulson! Review please, and leave Jally prompt ideas if you have any.
