After the initial shock wore off, and he was able to process the concept of being told he was about to die by a guy named Keith, whose existence was still fairly questionable, Lance began to feel doubt and denial slowly creep into the corners of his mind.
"Okay then, Keith the Grim Reaper…" Lance folded his arms and dubiously eyed the slightly incredulous expression on Keith's face, "how exactly am I going to die?"
Keith simply shrugged, flipping through his little notebook for a moment before glancing back up, "Car crash."
"Yeah, well what if I don't drive tomorrow?" Lance felt more than slightly irritated by the nonchalance that Keith seemed to exude; this was his life they were talking about, and this guy acted like he saw this sort of thing every day.
Which, Lance supposed in retrospect, may have actually been the case. But that was beside the point.
Keith didn't miss a beat, "You'll get jumped in an alley."
"Then I'll stay home." Lance folded his arms petulantly.
"House fire." Keith replied, inspecting his nails.
"I'll just sit on a bench outside!"
"Rabid squirrel."
"What if-"
"Look," Keith stood, suddenly irritated, "no matter what, you die tomorrow."
"Oh come on," Lance felt panic begin to settle in the pit of his stomach as reality ran its icy fingers down the back of his neck, "there's gotta be some way to change that. Some sort of kill switch, abort button, anything?"
"Look." Keith frowned, seeming suddenly uncomfortable, "The only way you can get out of dying tomorrow is if there's something you were meant to do. Like, I'm talking serious unfinished business."
"Oh great," Lance grinned, cracking his knuckles, "'cause I've got tons of that."
Keith raised a potentially regretful eyebrow, "Like what?"
"Dude, I'm twenty one." Lance smirked, not missing the way Keith seemed to be physically restraining himself from rolling his eyes, "I haven't done anything on my bucket list."
Keith folded his arms, "Name one thing."
Lance rubbed his neck as his brain grasped for an idea, "I've never tried out for the swim team."
"Too small."
"I've never been to New Zealand?"
Keith pinched the bridge of his nose, "If we gave extensions to everyone who hadn't been somewhere, no one would ever die and everyone would constantly travel."
"I've never gone skydiving!" Lance threw up his hands in frustration; Keith was making things needlessly difficult.
"Look. Lance." Keith fixed him with a controlled glare, "This can't just be some dumb thing that happens to pop into your head; it has to be something that would make your life meaningless without."
"Love."
Keith blinked, taken aback by his quick response, "What?"
Lance bit his lip, glancing down at his hands, which were nervously toying with the edge of the blanket, "I've never been in love."
They stared at one another for a tense moment, as Lance silently willed him to accept this excuse, before Keith raised one eyebrow skeptically, "… Lame."
"Shut up!" Lance hoped the room was dim enough that Keith couldn't see his embarrassed blush, "Can I get the extension or not?"
Keith flipped through his little book for a few seconds, muttering quietly to himself, before sighing and reaching into his back pocket, "Hold on, I'll call Shiro."
He pulled out a little black phone, and Lance watched on curiously as he dialed a number and held it to his ear.
"So… you get good service on that thing?" Lance smirked, "Who's your provider, Reapers R Us?"
"Shut up. Oh! No not you Shiro!" Keith glared as Lance cracked up laughing, and motioned for him to be quiet, "Yeah. Yeah, I just have a quick question. Okay."
He hung up and slid the phone back into his pocket, turning to Lance irritatedly, "I hate you."
"Keith!"
Lance jumped as a new person appeared in the room. This one was a good foot taller than Keith, and decked in all black. Part of his hair had turned white and he seemed to have an arm made out of metal, though Lance figured it would be rude to ask. "You really shouldn't talk to the clients like that."
"But Shiro-"
"Wait, so just, let me get this straight." Lance raised his eyebrows as they both turned to him in surprise, "You can teleport, but you still have to communicate through flip phones?"
Keith sighed in exasperation, "Lance Shiro, Shiro Lance. Lance is going to die tomorrow."
"Hopefully not!" Lance piped up.
"Right, hopefully not." Keith nodded placatingly, "Also, he can apparently see us."
Shiro nodded thoughtfully, "Yeah, that happens sometimes even if we don't choose to let them see us. Did you even read the manual?"
Keith shrugged, "I skimmed. Anyway, Lance wants to get an extension."
Shiro raised an eyebrow and turned to Lance, who suddenly felt ridiculous, asking if he could get an extension for love, "I… uh…"
"Lance? Buddy?"
Lance jumped guiltily, and whipped around to find Hunk and Pidge standing in the open doorway, "Who're you talking to?"
Lance glanced to the pair of reapers leaning against his desk, and then back at Hunk and Pidge in the doorway and smacked himself in the forehead, "No one guys, just playing out an argument in my head."
"Oh not again." Hunk sighed, clearly relieved.
Pidge however, didn't seem quite convinced, "What was the argument about?"
"Uh," Lance floundered for a moment, but eventually decided upon honesty, or at least something close to it, "How I'm going to die."
"You're arguing with yourself over how you're going to die?" Hunk and Pidge raised an eyebrow at one another incredulously, and Lance had to admit that it wasn't one of his better cover stories.
Lance heard a snicker from behind him, and fought off the urge to glare back at Keith.
"Uh, yeah, actually I am." Lance rubbed the back of his neck, "My anxiety says car accident, and my common sense says heart attack… what do you guys think?"
Pidge and Hunk glanced at one another. Pidge replied "Car accident." At the same time Hunk replied "Heart attack."
"Wait, wait," Pidge made a stopping motion with their hands, "Can I change my answer to "mauled by Nyma," or "beaten up by Rolo?""
"No, you can't," Lance glared at his two best friends, "And for the record, I'm totally over Nyma."
Pidge rolled their eyes in disbelief, and Lance's patience wore out as he heard another snicker from Keith.
"Alright, that's it!" Lance ushered them toward the door, "Lance needs Lance Time, so you two just go work on some machine or experiment or something in Pidge's room for an hour or two. Don't argue, I happen to know that right now is cutting into your nerd time, and I wouldn't want to deprive you of that."
"Wait a minute," Hunk paused in the doorway, carefully studying Lance's guilty expression, and he knew he was screwed; nothing ever got by Hunk.
"You're acting really strange, and you've never kicked us out like-" He paused and gasped dramatically, "You're sexiling us!"
"Yes!" Lance grabbed onto the opportunity with both hands, "I am actually, so if you could y'know…"
He made the universal "skedaddle" motion with his hands, and Pidge and Hunk snickered to one another, "So… Who is it?"
"Who is who?"
"Uh," Hunk raised an eyebrow at him, "the person you're… y'know…"
"Oh!" Lance floundered for a moment before his eyes met Keith's in the mirror on the wall by the door, "It's this guy named Keith from one of my lectures, you've never met him."
Pidge and Hunk exchanged another glance, and Lance really wished they would stop doing that. To his immense relief, Pidge finally shrugged and turned to leave, "I expect zero details later."
"Ditto." Hunk nodded, but he paused a moment on the threshold, and if he hadn't looked as anxious as he had Lance probably would have literally screamed in frustration, "Look, man, are you sure you're alright? I'm sure this Keith guy wouldn't mind if you rescheduled-"
"Yeah Hunk, I'm fine." Lance grinned forcefully, hoping it seemed at least slightly genuine, "I slept off whatever that was."
"Okay," hunk bit his lip, "If you're sure-"
"Totally," Lance clapped a hand on his shoulder, and Hunk's expression cleared slightly, "If I need you I'll call you, I promise. Alright?"
Hunk nodded, "Alright. I mean it about the details thing though, I do not need another detailed description."
"Got it big guy." Lance winked at him and Hunk left, shaking his head in defeat.
Lance carefully shut the door behind him, leaning against it, and turning back to the two reapers with great reluctance. A small part of him hoped they'd have disappeared, but the universe seemed particularly determined to screw him up, down, and sideways as he met Keith's vaguely confused expression.
"What?" Lance frowned, and Keith cocked his head to the side curiously.
"Sexiling?"
Lance covered his mouth to prevent his surprised laugh from escaping, "It's, uh… it's when you kick someone out of your dorm room so you can have sex uninterrupted."
"Wait..."
Lance watched as the gears in Keith's head churned slowly, and Shiro covered a smirk with his prosthetic hand. Finally, he could tell it clicked as Keith's expression turned livid, "YOU TOLD YOUR FRIENDS WE'RE FUCKING?!"
"Relax, it's not like they know you." Lance smirked at him, and Keith's murderous expression dialed up another notch.
"YOU-"
Keith growled as Shiro held him back with a vaguely apologetic grimace, "Sorry about him, he knows it's the best you could have come up with on such short notice… Anyway, what's that extension you wanted?"
"Right, uh…" Lance scratched the back of his neck, still watching Keith's homicidal expression.
"He wants to find love." Keith spoke up derisively, and Lance glared at him.
"Oh, alright." Shiro nodded.
"Wait what?!" Keith gaped at him and Lance had the urge to stick out his tongue.
"Allura says that in most cases finding love is a valid reason for an extension. Something about the purpose of life, or, no… The ultimate answer to life, the universe, and everything?" Shiro scratched the back of his head, "I don't know, it's something along those lines… anyway, how long do you estimate it'll take you to find love?"
Lance gaped at them, "You're asking me to estimate…? You do realize that it could take a while, right?"
Shiro grimaced, "The longer your estimation, the less likely it is that your extension will be approved."
"I don't know," Lance shrugged emphatically, feeling distinctly overwhelmed for what seemed like the millionth time that day, "I don't plan to stay alive forever, just cheat death for a little bit."
Lance blinked as Keith and Shiro both flinched at the same time, and Shiro motioned for him to be quiet, "Yeah, let's avoid using the "c" word for now."
"Huh?"
"The bosses up top really don't like it."
"All… right…" Lance tapped his foot anxiously, choosing to drop the subject for the time being, "But seriously though, I really have no idea how long it'll take."
"Just say a year," Keith rolled his eyes, "It's not like they pay that close attention anyway."
"You can tell her a year." Shiro raised an eyebrow at him.
"Shiro," Keith gave him a pleading look and Lance was confused, "She's more likely to listen to you."
"Nope, this is your case, you have to go talk to her."
"Fine." Keith rolled his eyes and abruptly popped out of existence, causing Lance to jump in surprise.
Shiro rolled his eyes affectionately, "Well, sorry again about him. He'll probably come back to tell you whether or not you got the extension, but if you don't die tomorrow, just assume you did."
Shiro shot him a small smile before vanishing and Lance couldn't help but feel like he wasn't in the best of hands.
Lance's mind raced as he was suddenly faced with the silence of an empty room, and he suddenly wished Hunk were there to crack a joke or just to make any sort of noise.
He paced about for a little while, trying to expel nervous energy as he attempted to corral his thoughts, but the silence in the room around him only served to rev up his nerves.
He was immensely relieved when Hunk finally wandered back in at around three a.m. and pestered him with questions about Keith, despite his earlier adamancy about not wanting details.
"He's a dick, and he's a prick, and he's a cock." Lance smirked and Hunk covered his ears, "What more is there to say?"
"Nevermind. I take it back, I want to know nothing!"
Lance snickered as Hunk shook his head and pulled on pajamas. Even if his mind was still reeling, Hunk's presence in the room was calming, if not for his company then simply for the normalcy.
He briefly debated telling Hunk about his encounter with Keith and Shiro, but ultimately decided against it. Hunk would just drag him by his ears to the nearest psychiatric ward, and deep down Lance knew that this was something he would have to resolve on his own.
After simply chatting for a little while, Hunk's yawns threatened to swallow them both whole, and Lance reluctantly allowed him to turn off the light, claiming he was tired as well, even though his anxiety felt like a bucket of ice water poured down his back.
His mind rebelled against the notion of sleep, and every time he so much as blinked he expected to see Keith pop into existence, informing him that sorry, there would be no extension, and would he like the blue coffin, or the red one?
As he sat alone in the darkness, listening to Hunk's quiet breathing, he finally allowed himself to delve into the craziness that was his day.
A small part of him wanted to believe that it was all just some misunderstanding. Maybe Keith had fucked up and visited the wrong person. Maybe he was in a coma, and this was all just some weird projection of his own subconscious.
If so, Lance thought wryly, he had a pretty messed up subconscious.
Keith was definitely one of the many aspects of this situation that Lance could have done without, even if the guy was decent enough to look at. He wondered vaguely what he had ever done in life to deserve Keith as a grim reaper.
Though, they hadn't seemed altogether that organized, so he supposed maybe it was just the unluck of the draw.
There was so much he still wanted to do, and the fact that he didn't even know whether or not he was destined to die the next day threatened to cleave his brain in two.
If he made it through the next twenty four hours without developing a stress ulcer it would be a miracle.
He didn't even want to begin to contemplate his extension. How was he supposed to find love in the span of one year? Keith had seemed rather nonchalant about the whole due date thing, and he had mentioned that they didn't pay that close attention…
Lance bit his lip, squeezing his eyes shut against the darkness. He would have to be smart about this. Squeeze all the time he could out of it, and if he was lucky…
Lance didn't want to think about the depressing prospect, but at this point, his best option was to never fall in love.
A/N
Hmmm, wonder how that's going to work out…
Sorry about the delay! The next chapter should be up in a day or two…
Thank you for reading, reviews are always welcome!
MDL
