For Abby K, inspired by her oneshot Smiles, a link to which may be found in my Faves.
Beta'd by Garth
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Chapter Two- White
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Kiba has been feeling less and less in touch with Akamaru as the days go by. He declined- however politely- his partner's offer of a ride, instead opting to walk home with his hands shoved in his pockets.
The pre-dawn light was muddy today; the forecast moaning gloom. A few stray raindrops splatter onto his upturned face, but the rain never gets any harder than a drizzle.
Kiba thinks that it gets a little harder to breathe every day.
When Kiba trudges in the door, his 'family' is wide-awake and ready to greet him. By habit Kiba bends down and wrestles a greeting with each of the four puppies. Akamaru sticks his nose into the pile, whuffing softly to get their attention. The puppies, distracted, descend on their father, leaving Kiba to get up and close the door. He may be on the Inuzuka estate, but that doesn't mean the whole clan appreciates being woken at 5 o'clock in the morning by yapping puppies.
The elegant white female who comes to greet Akamaru has become something Kiba doesn't like to think about. Where his partner is brown and a gray sort of white, this dog is ivory and snow. She has such a distinct femininity it made him recoil slightly when he first saw her; weirded him out just enough to make the back of his neck prickle. She hasn't been around long enough for this feeling to be entirely dispelled.
Akamaru stops tussling with the puppies to greet his mate, licking her muzzle affectionately, crooning something Kiba can't quite make out.
Kiba frowns, tosses his mask into a corner, and grabs a beer from the fridge. The couch protests as he flops down onto it, but he's tuning everything out now.
"Fucking world."
---x---
The dull pounding in his skull refused to let up, no matter how hard he tried to ignore it. Someone- definitely one of the puppies- was yapping insistently. Why couldn't they just shut up and let him-
"Kiba! Open this door now! I know you're in there"
Alright, so maybe the pounding isn't all in his skull.
Kiba squirms his way out of the furry pile his family made on him sometime during the night. There are a few bottles lying around empty, and his shirt has a huge, sticky stain on it that has spread to his arm and cheek. He shrugs out of the shirt quickly, tossing it over the bottles in a half-hearted attempt to cover up the binge. It doesn't take a lot to get any Inuzuka completely smashed.
Of course, the same attuned senses that get them into that state also tell him that he reeks of alcohol, and he knows there is no way he can get in a shower before Aburame Shino breaks down his door.
"What?" Kiba doesn't snarl, no matter how much he feels like it. Being hung over is never a good reason to snarl at Shino.
The dark-haired man in the doorway has no expression on his face, but it is not the same as Hinata's. The girl- woman- he'd come to love had an empty face; one devoid of all things that would indicate humanity. Shino simply looks as though he cannot be bothered to go to the trouble of arranging his face into and expression he may or may not be feeling at any given point.
Of course, the major difference between Hinata's face and Shino's face is that the right side of Hinata's is covered in pale, ghostly white scars, and Shino's is not.
"You were out last night," Shino says it nonchalantly, and Kiba can't help but feel a little babysat.
"Aren't big boys allowed to do that?" It takes a force of will to keep his voice even, to suppress the remaining headache that threatens to engulf him.
Shino snorts, doesn't reply.
Kiba knows the real reason Shino is here, but he keeps their conversation as routine as possible just to be safe.
All members of the ANBU are required to have a 'touchstone'; a person with whom they must identify and confer with at regular periods. Someone they are supposed to tell about all their moral dilemmas in regards to ANBU, about all the terrible things an ANBU is required to do.
The touchstone is supposed to be the person to keep them sane. Kiba isn't sure it helps.
Shino graciously allows Kiba to have a shower, and Kiba grumbles until he closes the bathroom door behind him. Today he has no particular interest in being awake, in 'greeting the day with youth and vigor', as Rock Lee has so often put it.
It isn't like he has a say though. Shino always shows up the morning after the mission, always shows up after Kiba's had his binge and is out cold with his dogs.
It is one of the few routines that Kiba does not hate so much.
---x---
Kiba and Shino are sparring.
It is not really the same kind of sparring he's seen Naruto and Sasuke pull. All punches and kicks; squirming, fighting, yelling, biting. This is a slow spar, one where the enemy punches slowly, deliberately, and you move to block it, reverse it, redirect it, and strike back.
It is not a training that works all the time for them, but it serves its purpose.
"You don't care about the mask," Shino says, his voice soft, his movements elegant.
"No. My fucking mask is just that; a fucking mask," Kiba grunts, redirecting a punch aimed at his jaw to the side, bringing his elbow up to smash Shino's face in.
Shino drops methodically, kicking out and hooking Kiba's leg. "Maybe you should put it where it is… less… visible?"
Kiba jumps upward, avoiding the kick but breaking his attempt at the elbow smash. "No. I ain't gonna hide the fucking mask. No point."
As some people will say that Hinata joined ANBU to be close to Naruto, they will say that Kiba joined ANBU to be close to Hinata.
This, at least, is true.
When Hinata announced emotionlessly that she was going to join the ranks of Konoha's elite, Kiba remembered jumping up and indulging in a rare moment of angry yelling. Why on earth would she put herself among the ranks of those faceless sadists? Why would she join them when all they do is serve and die; they don't have a purpose.
Hinata had given him one of her soulless looks and told him that she thought it was the best way she could serve her village. Kiba's harsh "bullshit" had not had the desired effect. She'd brushed it off and stood, closing the conversation.
Kiba, Shino and Akamaru had left the Hyuuga compound worried more than ever before. Hyuuga Hinata was not; had never been the kind of person to join ANBU. She had been, as it pained Kiba to remember, one of the sweetest, kindest, most caring people he knew. She watched others, cheered others, trained her hardest, and gave her best effort. It was not in her nature to be callous, to disregard how others felt in favour of turning all emotion off.
It was not in her nature to be cruel, and that was what Kiba and Shino feared.
Before 'the accident', as it was now called, Kiba had briefly entertained for her the idea of becoming ANBU, becoming one of the elite. It had been a fun afternoon, full of barking dogs and happy smiles, wistful thoughts of the future. Hinata had talked him out of it because she understood it to some degree, and he had told her he would never join ANBU as long as she didn't.
He joined ANBU because she did, because he'd promised to keep her safe, even if she'd been… forced… out of their bond. Dogs always keep their promises: that's one thing he has in common with Naruto.
Kiba dodges a punch and hates the future.
It's become his present.
---x---
Shino has convinced him that he shouldn't drop the mask in a corner where anyone can see it. He doesn't display his spiral tattoo everywhere he goes, why should he leave the mask where everyone and his father can see it?
Shino has also thoroughly kicked Kiba's ass, but Kiba wasn't really trying that hard.
He misses her stutter. Not a lot, not like he misses her smile. Walking home with Akamaru in the drizzle that hasn't ended, hands shoved in his pockets. Her stutter marked the passage of time, the way she was always frightened and weak, but terribly cute. When it had disappeared- after the second Chuunin exam, which she had passed with flying colours, he hadn't been sorry to see it go. It was a trait that would mark her out for him, make her special.
Akamaru's white mate barks at them when they arrive back at the apartment: her pureness is blinding even in the half-light.
Kiba misses the things that used to be, and wonders when he got so hung up on the past.
