Author's note: So another drabble straight out of our (mine and ur-a-baka95's) text messages (this chapter was written by ur-a-baka95) …. Reviews appreciated (and sorry if for some reason you find this offending)

Hetalia still isn't ours

(flashback)

Arthur Kirkland stood, staring (more like glaring) at the painting before him. It was of a certain Francis Bonnefoy looking very saintly and, well, pure. Which was completely the opposite of the man. "How the bloody hell does this pedophile become a freaking saint?"

Somewhere in the background, Yong Soo suddenly exclaimed, "Saintism originated in me, da-ze!"

Unbeknownst to Arthur, Francis had snuck up behind him, snaking an arm around the Englishman's waist. Arthur snapped back to reality when he heard the Frenchman sigh, "Ah, mon cher, I am finally recognized in my saintlihood."

"Is that even a word, you frog?" Arthur said as he pushed the other man away.

"Words originated in me, da-ze!"

Arthur and Francis glared at each other for quite some time before either one of them spoke.

"Wanker."

"Ah, but mon cher-"

"Bloody frog!" Arthur storms out of the room... a bit too much like a girl would.

"Girly storm-outs originated in me, da-ze!"

~Hetalia~

"Oi! Arthur! Wanna help me finish my ale?" the slightly drunk Scotsman, named Boris, asked his half-brother.

"Not now, Boris. I have a meeting with that bloody hamburger idiot to discuss war plans against Francis... that damn rapist..."

"Did you know he's a saint now?" This received a death glare from the Brit. Boris nervously giggled in response. "I'll just go see if Prussia and Germany are up for a drinking contest... Excuse me."

"Heya! What's up Arty?" called Alfred, waving him over with the hand not full of hamburger.

"Did you even get my message, you git?"

"What message?"

"You have got to be bloody kidding me..." Arthur said, almost to himself. "I called you after I escaped from Francis. We were going to meet here to plan revenge...?" Seeing no response from the seemingly clueless American, he started towards his brother again.

"Wait! Arthur! I will help you if you agree to go on a date with me!" The American flashed him his signature toothpaste ad smile, pleased with himself. "I'd say that's a pretty good deal for you!" he added with a wink.

After glaring at Alfred for some time, he finally gave in to the American's stubbornness. "You bloody wanker... Alright, I will go on a date with you..." As he said this, he turned away, blushing.

-later-

Boris smiled knowingly as his brother smiled evilly, laughing and rubbing his hands together. 'Oh, this is going to be good... He is obviously concocting some sort of evil plan. Hasn't he learnt yet?'

"So, ummm... Off to America's house, then?"

"Yes, or are you a bloody deaf drunk?"

"At least I'm not an angry drunk! And I have a high alcohol tolerance, unlike a certain someone I know, so I am not drunk at the moment."

"S-shut the fuck up! Why is my own bloody brother such a wanker?" Then he remembered his scheme, so he added with a dazzling smile, "But a wanker in a good way."

"How can you be a wanker in a good way?" Boris asked, more than a little creeped out.

"Let us continue to my favorite ex-colony's house, shall we?" Arthur asks, his smile never wavering.

(end flashback)

~Hetalia~

"Arty!" The Brit is greeted at the door by a big kiss from the powerful man. Arthur 'unintentionally' deepens the kiss. (He never admits his true feelings for him. Poor Alfred.) Blushing, Arthur pulls away, remembering that Boris had followed him to America's house.

Boris clears his throat. Alfred looks up, just now noticing the red haired man behind Arthur.

"So... umm... Who is this?"

"You have got to be kidding me! I have introduced you to my brother, have I not?" Arthur sighs in annoyance.

"Well, you can't expect me to remember everyone!"

"This is my half-brother, Boris. Otherwise known as Scotland," Arthur says, trying to keep his annoyance in check.

"Cool! Dude, is the Loch Ness Monster real!"

"Why is that ALWAYS the first question I'm asked?" The Scotsman says, annoyed.

"Because that's all that's in your country. Duh," says Alfred with a goofy grin on his face.

"Ooh and You're so cool with your Statue of Liberty!"

"Yeah. That and the Arch, the Space Needle, New York, California-"

"Alright! Alright, already! I get the picture!" Boris exclaims as he storms off.

As soon as Boris is out of view, Alfred leans in to kiss Arthur, who, blushing, pulls away.

"What do you think you're doing, you git!"

"Come on, Arty! Don't be like that!"

-Somewhere else, Elizaveta faints, watching the screen showing the footage from one of her many hidden cameras.-

Alfred and Arthur walk inside the house after seeing a very disgruntled old lady shaking her fist at them. "Save that for the bedroom!" she yelled at the pair, one of which was trying to hide his blushing face.

Once inside the house, they go to the living room, sitting down on the couch awkwardly, as far apart from each other as possible.

"So... Ummm... About the date... Where do you want to go?"

"You git! You're supposed to know the destination BEFORE you ask someone on a bloody date!"

Alfred pulls a hamburger out of nowhere and starts to nervously eat. "I know. I'm sorry..."

"Okay... fine you git. I'll go... But NO HAMBURGERS!"

"Aww... but Arty...!" Alfred pleads.

"You heard me," Arthur says as he crosses his arms. "And don't call me that!"

"Fine then, Iggy," Alfred responds, smirking.

"Stop that, you git!" Arthur says as he finds himself once again being kissed by the American.

"No. Not until you prove that you don't like it."

Arthur turns away, blushing ten shades of red. "Bollocks..."

Alfred hugs him from behind, making the Englishman blush even more if that is even possible. Alfred proceeded to kiss and suck on Arthur's neck. "D-don't... Bloody wanker..."

Alfred turns Arthur to face him and once again their lips meet, tentatively at first. The smaller Englishman melts into the kiss as the other deepens the kiss.

Alfred leans back, still embracing Arthur. "Still want me to stop?" he says in a smug voice.

Arthur brings them back to the previous subject with, "Well, since we have already agreed no hamburgers," Alfred frowns slightly at this, but surprisingly does not interrupt. "How about we go to that new Italian restaurant?"

"You mean Buono Tomato? That place is amazing!" Alfred lightens up as he says this.

~Hetalia~

As Arthur and Alfred get seated in the restaurant, everyone is staring, so Arthur discreetly asks for a more private seat. He gets his wish.

Then they see 'it'. A wall of 'Feli's BFFs'. Their faces were right in the center next to a huge picture of Ludwig.

They got a seat near the kitchen, so they can hear their friends in there easily. "G-get off me, tomato bastard! Mmph-"

"Ve~! Fratello is so cute with Antonio!"

"S-shut up! I need to go take Alfred and Arthur's orders!"