CHAPTER II

Every molecule of Jasper's body crackled. He buzzed painfully from his lips through the sensitive arches of his feet. He could see nothing and scarcely recognized the wet, smacking sounds as he frantically sucked his lips and teeth. The restraining arms of Edward and Emmett were like iron bands around his own as they hurtled him through the forest, away from the house. It had taken both of them to pry his jaws apart and pull him from Bella. There were no independent sensations anymore, just the intensity of Edward's and Emmett's struggle him, which he could sense from inside his own body and from without.

There was only one fixed point, one safe place in the maelstrom that raged around him--Alice. She was somewhere near by. He could taste her grief and fear--potent as the lingering traces of Bella's blood in his mouth.

"Jasper. Jazz." Alice's breath brushed against his neck and her hand lay against his chest. They had stopped moving --because he had stopped struggling, he realized--and he was suddenly crippled by another emotion. Fury.

He didn't have to see Edward's face to read his savage anger; he had no doubt Edward would snap his arm off, given the slightest provocation. In fact, provocation might be wholly unnecessary, he thought, as Edward's grip tightened even as Emmett's slackened.

"Carlisle and Esme are with her," Alice was saying. "I think. . . we were in time."

Jasper blinked down at her, fighting to put meaning to the words as his blood lust began its slow wane. How could Alice possibly say they'd been "in time?" In time to what? Keep him from draining Bella dry? His snarled at himself—his hair-trigger blood-instinct had been too sensitive for even Edward to read. It was not thought but animal instinct that drove him when the tiny slit in Bella's finger swelled with red. The memory hit him deep in the belly, and a split-second later Edward had his arm pinned brutally against his spine.

"Let me go, damn it! I'm leaving!"

"Good," Edward spat, and he pushed him away so hard that Jasper's other arm slid right out of Emmett's grasp. Alice just managed to step out of the way before her lover could plow into her. The momentum carried him a good thirty yards, before he could turn to glare at Edward, who in turn dropped into a crouch, slavering for a fight. Before he could spring, however, Emmett landed on him, slamming him face-first into the forest floor.

"This doesn't help anything!" Emmett was perched on Edward's back like a vulture, taking advantage of his brother's sudden vulnerability. "Let it go and get where you're needed."

Edward was too blinded by his emotions to spare any effort at mind reading, and since Jasper's own energy was focused on protecting himself from that same anger, he knew how powerful it was.

"Let. Me. Up."

Emmett just gave a ghost of a smile, stuck his elbow against Edward's neck, and rested his chin on his hand. "You're not threatening me, bro," he said in a low voice. "I'll let you up when I'm convinced you're going to do the right thing."

Sometimes Jasper was surprised by Emmett's ability to come up with the right words at the right time, and he felt Edward's internal shift when Emmett addressed the moral issue.

Jasper was glad he had resisted the urge to intervene. He tried to hold others' emotions as sacrosanct, thought it wasn't always possible, and knowing Edward's were fully justified made him less inclined than usual to take a hand in them. It took several minutes for Edward to get a grip on himself, and when his body relaxed, Emmett released him.

He did not spare a look at anyone but snapped to his feet and disappeared into the trees in an instant. Alice nodded at Emmett who seemed to be waiting for permission. "Go ahead," she said, and he tore off in pursuit of his brother.

Jasper released a breath he didn't know he was holding. He slumped heavily against a pine and clutched his head between his hands. The relief of Edward's departure was powerful, but while Jasper was spared the greater anger, he was bitterly conscious of another emotion--his own this time. Guilt. Bitter as moose blood, but with none of the soothing qualities.

Alice was waiting for him, but he felt no impatience from her, only concern, and love. As always. But for the very first time, he wanted to turn away from her longsuffering forbearance. He had killed before, and been accepted unconditionally afterward, but never had it been someone they knew--someone his family loved. Someone Alice loved. The shame was unbearable.

Her voice came to him, soft but fervent. "Don't you go. Don't you dare go anywhere without me."

Jasper raised his head, ready to flinch from Alice's pleading expression. Instead he found her with her head bowed, and the heels of her hands pressing brutally against her eyes

"I'm sorry I didn't see it," she said.

"You're not blaming yourself for this. You didn't attack her."

"I was so excited about the party. . ." her words collided with his own.

"I shouldn't have gotten so close."

"Don't," theysaid simultaneously, and Alice gave him a pinched smile.

Jasper lowered his face into her flame-like black hair, and breathed her in. He loved the smell of the top of her head. Sometimes, when she hadn't washed her hair for several days--a rare thing—he could fill his head with her scent, magnolia and spring rain. He wished he could sink into in the smell and never emerge.

Edward was always going on about Bella's freesia scent, but Jasper found it mildly off-putting and overly sweet.

And why did that damn thought have to come to mind just now?

The pairing between the two of them was absurd. Bella was a child while Edward had done several lifetimes worth of living already. And while Bella seemed to be a perfectly decent human girl, the relationship was inequitable—unhealthy, and probably would be so even if they were both vampires. . . . But whatever Jasper's practical concerns, Bella didn't deserve to die. And he sure as hell didn't want to be the one to kill her.

"We need to go back, Jazz."

"Back? I'm heading that direction." He jutted his chin to the left, away from the house.

"You need to come with me." Alice started away in opposite direction, willing him to follow.

"What do you see?"

"That we need to go home." Leaves crunched underfoot as she slipped farther away from him.

"Alice?"

He took an unsteady step (unsteady for a vampire). Alice was forever telling him what she saw and what was coming, the fact that she wouldn't this time set sent a chill through him and set his legs to moving.

"Is she going to be all right?" he asked. The trees melted into a blur of color as he tried to catch up.

Still, Alice did not reply.

* * * * *

Jasper's sensitive ears picked out the voices before he could internalize the emotions.

"How could you do this? How the hell could you let this go, Carlisle?"

"It was her choice."

"It's for the best."

He paused just outside the open front door, where he watched Alice slide up next to Esme who, in turn, draped an arm over her shoulders. Bella lay on the couch with Edward crouched beside her, and he glowered at Carlisle as he stroked her trembling hand.

"She can't make a choice. There's no sort of informed consent for this!"

Rosalie, who lingered just inside the door, made an injudicious smug sound, and it was only a pained gasp from Bella that kept Edward from tearing into her like a rabid animal.

"Shh, love. It's going to be okay." His voice was strained and heavy with pain, but Bella relaxed fractionally. Though she could scarcely have been conscious, she knew Edward was with her.

"She can't make this choice!" Edward repeated, low enough that only the vampires could hear.

Carlisle just shook his head, knowing full-well his son was beyond having a reasonable, calm discussion. It was too late for such a thing at any rate.

"You could have stopped this!" Edward insisted. He rose to his feet and advanced toward Carlisle, and Jasper felt it time to intervene. Edward spun toward him.

"Don't fuck with me," he growled, thrusting a menacing finger toward Jasper. "You've done enough damage today."

"Please—" Alice began, but it was Emmett who finished. He caught Edward in the chest and thrust him against the living room wall so hard that it made an impression in the drywall, and a crack meandered its way up to the ceiling.

"That's enough! You're out of control. You're not thinking."

Jasper wasn't in the mood to wait on Edward now and, with an effort, he smoothed off the edges of his brother's anger. Edward's eyes glazed momentarily, and Jasper was ashamed by the plaintive, frustrated look Edward shot him, until he wiped those feelings away as well.

There was a sudden movement from the couch and Bella patted her hand blindly through the air, seeking Edward's. Emmett dropped him back to the floor, and he was beside her in a heartbeat.

"Don't be angry," Bella said. "Please don't. I want this—for us." Jasper was stricken by the pain and weakness in her voice. Without vampire hearing the words would have been unintelligible.

"It's ok, love. Don't worry. It's going to be all right."

"We've got to get her out of here," Emmett said. "This will be the first place they search."

"Denali," said Carlisle.

"We can't all just leave. That'll be too suspicious," Rosalie argued.

Esme shifted uneasily. "And what about the Quil--?"

"We'll deal with it," Carlisle said.

Now that he had calmed Edward somewhat, Jasper was able to think more clearly and the answer seemed obvious--if not desirable.

"I'll take her. I'm supposed to be away at school anyway," he said somberly.

"She's not going anywhere with you," Edward spat.

"Edward!" cried Alice.

"Let him be angry, he has a right," Jasper said. He grimaced inwardly at his own hypocrisy as he himself undermined Edward's righteous anger.

"Well, I'm going too," added Emmett. "You can't take her alone." Jasper couldn't quite tell whether Emmett meant that he couldn't be trusted alone with her even now, or if he were merely thinking of the logistical difficulties.

Rosalie didn't care either way. "What the hell are you thinking?"

Emmett was stoic, without a trace of his usual good humor as he replied to her. "I'm just going to see them up there safely. Then I'll catch a plane and meet you wherever you want, Rose. But we're the only ones who can do it. No one even knows we're in the country, and Jasper's supposed to be in New York."

Rarely did Emmett make such an executive decision, so when he did everyone took notice. Rose was the first to react, and she did so by turning on her heel and striding out the front door without a word. A moment later came the hum of her BMW's engine. Then Alice left too, disappearing up the stairway in a blur of motion.

"I'm going too," Edward said hoarsely. "You can't take her from me."

Carlisle reached up and gripped the back of his own neck; it didn't take the powers of an empath to recognize it as a gesture of unease. Esme reached for his other hand.

"If you go, Edward, everything's going to fall in on us. You'll be the first suspect--."

Edward shook his head like a stunned bull. "We can. . .fake our disappearance. Both of us."

"I don't see how--"

"You haven't seen clearly for a while now!" Edward snapped.

Jasper clenched his teeth and turned the dial up on Edward who dropped his head and raised Bella's hands to his lips. He hated doing it, taking away something so personal from anyone. As needful as it was at the moment, it was painful to see Edward essentially anesthetized and unable to make a decision during one of the most horrific moments of his existence.

"Please. Please listen to Ca--" Bella's words failed as she broke off in a sharp cry. She was sweating hard now, and her limbs convulsed as if a live wire ran down the length of her body. "We. . . need to do this right."

Those were her last words before the pain overtook her, and Jasper expanded his range of feeling to encompass her as well.

There was a flurry of movement on all sides. Alice and Esme up and down the stairs and out to the car. Carlisle on the phone with Irina. Bella gasping and writhing in Edward's arms, as he spoke soft words in her ear, comfort, and love and apologies over and over again.

Jasper wished to God-Almighty he would quit. If anyone should apologize. . . .

He cocked his head and concentrated more on Bella as she endured the pain he had brought upon her.

"Does that actually help?" Edward asked over his shoulder. His words were slow, as if he were sedated.

"I don't know," Jasper admitted. "It calms her emotionally, which in turn might affect her system like meditation. Or, maybe, I don't know. . . If the emotion and adrenaline actually help dull the pain. . .? You're the one with the medical degrees."

Bella's hand had gone slack in Edward's, and while she was still shuddering and whimpering, the lines around her pinched-shut eyes seemed shallower now, and the tendons no longer stuck out on her neck.

"Do you want me to stop?" Jasper asked.

Edward brushed a sweat-soaked lock of hair from her temple.

"No."

The preparations did not take long, but becoming a vampire was not at all dignified. Bella urinated herself before being moved to the car, and Edward and Jasper averted their eyes while Esme put her into some clean clothing. That done, Edward gathered Bella into his arms and followed Jasper out to where Emmett waited with the Aston.

Esme followed quickly behind. "Maybe I should go with—" she began, but at a tiny shake of Alice's head, said no more."

Alice hovered beside Jasper as he slid in behind the wheel of Edward's Aston. "When you hit the border, take 97 to 16 as fast as you can," she said. "Keep your cell on and I'll keep an eye on the road."

In the back, Edward was transferring Bella into the keeping of his brother, still muttering softly to her, words that she couldn't possibly be able to hear.

"Keep to the back roads until you're further north," Carlisle told him.

"I will." Jasper considered the elaborate dashboard briefly, annoyed that no one in the family had an inconspicuous car. He held tightly to his frustration, fearing what lay beneath it.

They were ready to go, and for a moment Jasper wished he could run, simply charge into the forest as he had meant to do just fifteen minutes earlier. It would have meant leaving Alice, at least for a while. But wasn't he doing that anyway?

She leaned in to press her cheek to his.

"I love you, Jazz. Don't forget."

He tried to return the sentiment, but found his throat clenched tight. He held her eyes with his, until he thought he might choke with shame and love for her.

In the back seat, Carlisle and Esme finally convinced Edward to move away from the car.

"I love you, Bella. So much," he whispered to her.

There was no sound from Bella, save her labored panting and a tiny rhythmic whimper.

"She'll be strong and sparkly next time you see her, bro." Emmett said, and pulled the door shut.

Jasper rather expected Edward to say something to him. "Take care of her," possibly, but Edward said not a word and refused to meet his eye as Jasper gave a final glance over the anxious group.

Alice's expression was blank now as she looked far ahead, beyond what anyone else could know.

"Hit it," Emmett said, and Jasper shook his head to clear it and tore down the drive.

In his peripheral vision, he could see Edward speed along side the car. Down one mile and then two. He accompanied them on foot for seventeen miles, until they came to the intersection of the first major highway north.

Jasper could not bring himself to watch Edward fall back into the safety of the pines.