Okaaaay, next chapter. Yay! Kind of short, but I'll update soon. Reviews would be very much appreciated ^^
I can't believe that after all this time that I shunned the idea that I'm finally taking her advice, but it turns out that she just might be right. I need to make sure that I preserve this in some way. I'm the one of the few demons in my tribe who can write, so I can't think of a better way to do it. Here it goes…
To myself,
I'm writing this letter to you for one reason and for one day that hasn't happened yet. The day. I spent a long time not knowing exactly where she came from. At first, I had a hard time believing that she was from an era that doesn't even exist yet, but it all began to make sense. Here home is far away from ours, so far that the only thing that can reach it is something beyond our complete understanding. The day that I know is going to be here very soon is the day that the line between her world and ours will become a wall, a wall that nothing will ever penetrate again. The wall is time itself. Nothing can fight against time. Nothing.
I have to remember the first day that we met… It's so hard though, because all I can remember is him. Inuyasha. The only thing that I can remember that day is when we first met; the scent of blood was in the air. I was angry, too. My wolves were dead and I couldn't have asked for any better person to throw my anger toward. A dog-demon, a half-breed, even, nothing could have been more perfect. God, I hate thinking about this, but I have to get past it. We ended up shouting at each other and eventually we ended up fighting, just the way that enemies should. I was a wolf, he was a dog, it couldn't have been more convenient. We tried to kill each other the first day that we met. I charged at him with all of the rage I could muster and he undoubtedly did the same. Yet, the best part of that moment was that I knew who he was, I knew his face, I could see his body, hear his voice, and smell his scent. It was a very, very small moment, but I do remember it well. He meant nothing to me, absolutely nothing. For that one moment he was just my enemy and he needed to be destroyed without a single thought. I didn't love him, I hated him. It was so easy to do.
Then his scent hit me, it's that one moment on that day that I remember the most. I loved his scent the very first moment that I breathed it in. It was like… I don't even know. There are some moments in life where you just don't know why, but you're happy. You're peaceful and feel a great swell of energy in you. Life becomes meaningful and you feel like everything that you're trying to get is worth it. Sometime you feel that way when you breath in the air of a perfect morning, or when the rain suddenly stops after a long downpour. Whatever causes that feeling, it was exactly the way I felt when I first took in his scent, it was subtle, but refreshing. I had already thrown the first punch when I realized that I didn't really want to destroy him anymore. I fought him, but nobody won. I don't really believe that you can love someone for real the first time that you see them, but that moment was damn close.
That day, I did proclaim love to someone, but it wasn't him. It was Kagome. She's pretty, she's kind, but also strong and independent. I guess that I was trying to deny what had just happened in my screwed-up little head, but I felt safe when I yelled it out loud in front of him, his friends, and twenty other members of my tribe. "I've fallen in love with you, Kagome!" is what I said. It made him despise me even more. Better yet, it gave me a reason to fight with every time that we would ever meet in the future. Nothing could have been more convenient and in everyone's eyes, it made perfect sense. It was perfect, but I hate myself for doing it.
I found out one day that her home isn't another place, but another time. The only thing that was letting this line be crossed was the power of the jewel. The Shikon Jewel of the four souls, it's the cause of so much damn suffering. It's incredible, and somehow, terrifying. We all sort of swore that we would destroy Naraku one day. On that day, the jewel would be put back together and become whole once again. Days after that, we would try to find a place where no demon or human could ever find it again. We would fail, I knew it before we even started. Life never gives you everything. Days after our failure we would have to put an end to it and Kagome was the only one who could do that. On some uncertain day, she would have to put an end to the jewel with a final wish. On that day, the power of the Shikon would be ended permanently. That impenetrable wall of time would go back up and we would never be able to pass through it again. Because of that, before that fateful day, Kagome would have to make a choice. Her time, or ours? Inuyasha, or her family? There was no way to have both, and I knew what she was going to choose. Kagome is noble, she cares about him, I know. Still, she also cares about her family and, like me, she would place her pack over love. She would leave us.
I know it, I just know that day is going to come. That's why I'm writing this letter, a letter to myself.
I don't know what day it's going to be, but it's coming, and if you're reading this, then I guess that it's here. This letter is for your eyes only, so keep it hidden.
She's about to leave us forever, and I'm guessing that you're worried more than you've ever been in you whole life. Inuyasha loves her, you know this, and you've seen it in his eyes. Every time you've seen anything close to a real smile has been when he was with her, he's even laughed a few times when they were talking. Right now, as I write this to you, I'm calm and collected, but when she's leaving, I won't be. That's why this little piece of common sense has to be preserved and remembered for when this day comes. I don't know what will happen when they say their farewell, it might be nothing or it might be… it doesn't matter. The point is that you have to remember who Kagome is. Kagome is a good-hearted person, she's been your friend and she's put up with all of the flirting that you ever relentlessly thrown at her. She's been kind, she's brought you gifts, she's healed your wounds, even saved your life a few times. Hell, she even gave you this journal.
So, really, my point is, when the moment comes, when the goodbyes are said, remember. Remember everything that I said about everything that she's done for you, and show your appreciation. For that one moment, do everything that you can to forget about the love between her and Inuyasha that you envied so greatly. Forget all of those times when the looked at each other with the depth and meaning that you wanted so badly to be between you and him. Just for that moment, feel the swell of gratitude that she deserves and forget your jealousy. It's the right thing.
Last, I'm not so sure what will happen once she jumps down that well for the last time. The very last time. The other will move on, no doubt, but I seriously have no idea what will happen to Inuyasha. That love that he been so strong between them is about to be broken, it's going to become impossible. He might move on, he might not. Something even worse than those two possibilities might even happen, pray that it doesn't. Whatever happens, remember this and follow it.
It's over.
The artificial rivalry between you and Inuyasha has to be over. It has to end. Once she's gone, once she's left us forever, the endless battle has to be over. I don't care what people think or what they say or how shocked they may be, it has to end. So make every effort to let those days go and create something new between the two of you. That's your mission, remember it well. I don't care what I've been told, if it's a crime, then I guess that you're a villain, now. It doesn't matter. You have to befriend Inuyasha, you have to help him through this in any way that you can.
I guess… that's all I can say now. Just remember what I said, good luck, me.
-Kouga
Kouga quietly set the paper down at his side, he silently stared at the specks floating in the sunlight coming through the window. He took the letter up in his hand and took one final glance at it, and then at the waving flame one the table. The candle was a short stub in a mound of melted wax, well-used and nearing the end of its life. With a small motion, Kouga lower the corner of his letter into the tip of the flame and smiled softly as the edges blackened and ignited. A few moments was all that it took for the orange light to glaze over his neat handwriting and turn the ink to a bright grey and then to nothing. The ashes fell away in weightless flakes, leaving Kouga with the last corner of the paper in his fingers. He gave a firm blow toward the burning fragment of paper and watched the flames sputter away, leaving only the last words visible.
Remember what I said, good luck, me. –Kouga.
With that, he left the ashes curling around in the air and slipped the remaining corner of the letter into his metal chestplate.
Today was the day. The day that everything was going to change.
That's all for now, kiddies! Write a review and tell me what you think. Anything you want more or less of? And don't worry, the lemons WILL come XD
