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Chapter Two
I'm not sure how it happened. The three of us—Kakashi-sensei, Sakura-chan, and I—were flying through the trees, on a mission far from home, when we heard what sounded like fighting. After a short debate, we decided to see what was happening and headed towards the sounds, but they stopped before we could get there. So we split up and continued in the general direction we thought the sounds had been coming from. I was the one to find him. I'm not sure how it happened.
As soon as I recognized the body slumped tiredly against the tree, I jumped down from my hiding spot and ran to him. (It had actually taken me longer than usual to realize who it was, with all the blood covering him.)
I shot the other body a glance as I passed by it, and was not too surprised to find that I knew him too. The surprising thing was that he was dead. A million thoughts raced and flickered through my mind at the implications of this realization, but I shoved them to the side for the moment. More important now was the still-breathing Uchiha and the state he was in. (So much blood.)
"Sasuke." I say his name, standing directly in front of him. He raises his head, but looks at his brother. He frowns and shakes his head a bit. I also frown, and repeat his name. He finally looks up to me. He does not look surprised to see me, merely…satisfied? Yes. Maybe even a little happy. I have not seen him happy since…I cannot remember. (Have I ever?)
I fall to my knees in front of him, taking in all the red covering his white form. There is so much. (On his arms and legs and chest and face and stomach and snow-white shirt.) Is it all his? No, it can't be. There is simply too much—trailing down his arms and dripping off his fingers to be soaked up by the earth. But some of it must be his. If not for the simple—brutal—fact that he could not—nobody could—take down Itachi Uchiha without being wounded, the glazed look in his eyes would tell me so.
This is not the same look he has been wearing since he left Konoha. That was a glaze of indifference. This is a glaze of…unawareness. He has not insulted me, has not threatened me, or tried to kill me. Does he even know…? It almost seems like he's completely forgotten the years that we've been apart.
I see his lips working around words, but all that actually comes out is my name. All I can bring myself to do is repeat his own name, then gather him gently so he is lying in my arms. He does not protest the action at all, and that alone is enough to break me. I do not even notice as I start crying, but he does.
"Naruto, why are you crying?" he asks me, and the voice is so quiet. So weak. Weak is something I would never have expected to apply to him. "Everything is all right now. Isn't it?"
No. Nothing is right. There is too much blood to be right. Nothing can ever be right again. I try to smile—just for him. I wonder if he actually believes what he is saying…? "Yes, Sasuke. Everything will be better now. I've found you at last."
"Look, Naruto." He nods in the direction of his brother. "I killed him." Yes, there is even more blood covering him and soaking the black Akatsuki cloak to prove it. "I can finally go home now."
"Home…" I repeat unknowingly, not moving my eyes from the dead Uchiha. Sasuke wants to go home…Everything he has lived and trained for and sought power from Orochimaru for and left Konoha and his friends for…is now lying dead on the ground. He completed his purpose in life. Now he just wants everything to go back to the way it should be—to the way it never was. I want it, too. Sasuke did not ask for his destiny, for his path as an avenger. Itachi thrust it on him. But now Sasuke is free from him, free of the life chosen for him. Now maybe he can live his own. (I've always been good at deluding myself, I've been told.)
"Yes…home. I still have to restore my clan. My purpose is not gone," he tells me.
So he will never be free…For the rest of his life, he will be trying to repair the hurts Itachi has done. (But how long will the rest of his life be?)
"Do you think they will forgive me?" he suddenly asks. I look down at him and see…guilt. He regrets. He is still human…
I gather up all the happiness I can and force it into a bright smile. "Of course they will, Sasuke!" (No, they won't.) "If I can forgive you, then they can too!" If only it were that simple. He betrayed his home, after all, and sought power from the enemy. All it takes is one apologetic look from him to have my forgiveness and willingness to start again fresh, but…they are not so willing. I know they would never…He could never…
"That's good…" He sighs and closes his eyes. My heart jumps and I tighten my grip on him, shaking him a bit. I cannot…He cannot—! He opens his eyes. My heart calms a bit. "I'm sorry…for trying to kill you."
There have been several times he tried to kill me—much too many—but I think I know the one he is thinking of. The Valley of the End, where it almost did all end—where a part of it did end. That part hurt more than any Chidori. I smile—a little. I'm not sure why. The memories are nothing to smile about. Maybe because he's sorry? "That's alright. I tried to kill you too." (Did I really?) I don't think I could ever…actually…
"Tell Sakura…that I'm sorry for making her cry."
No, no. This is all wrong. The Sasuke I know—the one I don't want to—the one Sasuke has become because of his brother—does not do this. He does not apologize. He has not ever once apologized before today, that I'm aware of. He does not care. But now he does? Why? These are sounding much too much like last words. No! I cannot…He cannot…He will not! I will not let him! I've gone through too much for too many years for him to…
"You're going to tell her yourself," I say, strong and certain. She will be so happy… "You're going to be fine, and we're going to go home." And I will have at last fulfilled my promise… "You still have to restore your clan, remember?" I wonder which of us I am trying to convince.
"Home. They'll forgive me." His voice is certain, but has a yearning quality to it, buried deep inside, that says he can only dream of it. As he is dreaming now.
"That's right," I assure him. (Or me.) But just to disprove my point, the blood is still flowing—trailing down his arms and dripping off his fingers. The blood tells me that if I wish to do as I say—to see him live free of his determined life—I must do something about the source.
I dig around in my pack and quickly produce a long roll of bandages. I begin wrapping them around his torso with one hand, supporting him with the other. I cannot see the wound through the blood, but I know it is very bad, and very deep. "Just hold on," I find myself murmuring. "Don't leave me yet." (Never, never, never, nevernevernevernevernever—)
The corners of his lips turn up into some semblance of the smile I haven't seen in much too long. He makes an odd choking noise in his throat and his lips twitch, blood spilling between them. His eyes fall half-closed. (No, no, no, nonononono—!)
I begin shaking him again, calling his name repeatedly. He only sighs and does not respond. –nonononono!— I continue to call his name, still unaware as the tears begin again. He wanted to go home…
And that is how Kakashi and Sakura find me some time later, still shaking him and calling his name.
End.
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