Author's Note: First, a huge THANKS for reading the first chapter and leaving such encouraging comments!
Also, I remain very open to suggestions with the direction of this fic. So feel free to leave me something you would like to see and I will try and incorporate it if it fits with the characters and overall plot that I have in mind.
Anyways, this chapter introduces why Harry is the way that he is. I am not going to spend a lot of time rehashing things, but since I am making him dark I do need to develop that just a little. And I think the Dursleys will play a large part in how he develops, obviously.
Here is my disclaimer that says I do not own anything Harry Potter related. Everything belongs to JK Rowling, except in universe 47837. Probably.
Harry Potter always knew that he was different. How could he not; it wasn't like the Dursleys had ever looked at him with anything other than contempt for him to think otherwise.
In fact, one of the very first memories that he could ever remember having – aside from a bright green light that he always saw in his dreams – was his Aunt and Uncle calling him a freak.
Because that was what he was to them. Something so very un-Dursley like that he was a threat to their way of life of perpetually trying to be as normal and dull as possible. Harry was nothing like their child, Dudley, who was showered with affection and praised because he was what a proper child should be according to their ideals. Meanwhile, while they treated him like a little lord, Harry was left to feel and to live like a pauper.
What made things even worse was that Harry seemed to develop far faster than Dudley. He said his first word months before Dudley; however, his milestones were completely ignored while they oohed and ahhed over the drooling capabilities of their precious son.
And since he was so very young, he didn't understand why he was being treated so differently. At first, he thought that he simply was not trying hard enough and that the Dursleys were unhappy because of that. So he tried even harder to showcase just how special he really was. However, the Dursleys hadn't liked it that he had called Petunia 'mummy,' after hearing her trying for hours on end to get Dudley to say the same thing.
Indeed, Harry didn't have any luck with anything else that he tried either.
They certainly didn't accept that Harry had stood first or had taken a short walk around the living room while Dudley was still learning how to roll over. If anything, it had only made things harder for him and soon he realized that he was the reason why they looked at him with such disdain. But Harry didn't know what he had done to deserve it.
And while Dudley was supplied with more food than he could ever eat – though that didn't stop the little nugget from trying to get thirds and fourths – Harry was lucky if he went to bed without hunger pains. Which was a very hard thing for a toddler to do, but it did not take Harry long to figure out that crying was an unacceptable sound unless it was coming from Dudley and so he began to hold it all inside.
It was only natural then that Harry learned very quickly that he was better off staying out of their way and so he spent a large majority of his time inside his own head.
For a while, things progressed in a similar manner: Harry continued to develop at an incredible rate while doing everything in his power to make them notice him as little as possible. Simultaneously, Dudley was taken to the park and to the zoo and given lots of presents whenever he wanted – or he had learned over the years that a little tantrum was all he needed to convince his parents to give him what he had wanted in the first place.
Of course, no presents were ever given to Harry, and hand-me-downs just didn't count. Instead, Harry soon reached the age where the Dursleys had decided that he needed to start earning his keep, and so he began to cook and clean more and more each day until he just did all of the work around the house by himself.
Also around this point in time, just as he was quite certain that what they were doing was in fact not how one ought to treat a child, Harry discovered magic.
Only he didn't know that it was magic.
The day had started off normal enough as he was charged with preparing breakfast for Dudley's special birthday. Then, after working tirelessly with no show of appreciation, he had been left to clean the entire house while Vernon, Petunia, and Dudley had gone out to celebrate Dudley in all of his glory away from him.
Knowing that there was an awful lot for him to do, he began at once.
However, around midday, Harry's arms were growing tired from their constant use of lifting things that were far too heavy for someone of his size and he dropped one of Petunia's ugliest and most-prized teapots.
Harry knew right away that he was in for a whipping, something that he had done his best to try and avoid after Vernon's first beating.
Though, just as he was about to give way to despair at how horrible his life was, he felt a most unusual feeling stir in his chest. It was the most wonderful sensation that he could ever recall feeling and it seemed to have a life of its own as it radiated throughout his body and filled him with strength.
Then quite unexpectedly, Harry literally felt a surge of something go through him as he sat on the ground holding the remnants of the broken teapot that he just wished could be fixed. His fingers became numb as his hands grew warm and, shockingly, the pieces started to move and reassemble themselves before his eyes.
Harry was stunned as he was left holding the perfectly sound and ugly teacup again in his hands. It took him a few moments to be able to process everything that had just happened before a huge smile broke out onto his face.
He could still feel the tingling in his fingertips and his intelligent and advanced mind naturally wanted to see if he could do it again.
Carefully, Harry set the teapot back on the shelf and focused on the rest of the dishes that he still needed to clean and put away. He struggled for what seemed liked a while, trying to hold his fingers in different positions or even holding onto each dish in his attempt to recreate that feeling.
It wasn't until he combined that feeling in his hands with the clear intent of wanting something to be done so badly that he felt that similar sensation again which soon shot of his hands and cleaned each and every dish before him.
Though he was tired from the multiple attempts, Harry was pleased that he had seemingly unlocked the trick to using what he now referred to as his gift. After taking a short break in which he ate a few things from the fridge that he was certain would not be noticed by his relatives, Harry went around the house and tested his theory that he had only needed to strongly desire something and focus himself for it to happen.
Item after item was checked off of his to-do list as his gift helped him to finish cleaning the house. By the end of it he was exhausted and had never felt so spent in his entire life. His gift, he assumed, must have required a lot of energy to use – more so than would be required by doing any of it by hand. Which was the one thing he was worried about now as he felt an intense need for food in his stomach.
Reluctantly, but with no other choice, Harry headed for the fridge where he siphoned off some of the leftovers and other items that had such large quantities that he hoped Petunia would not figure it out. This was due to the simple fact that Harry was not supposed to eat food unless it was given to him. He didn't want to be whipped again.
However, he was still quite hungry when he finished and headed to the pantry where he raided anything in there that he thought that he could get away with eating unnoticed, too!
The food helped, but his hunger still wasn't fully satisfied as it became darker and he heard their car approach. With a last look around to make sure that nothing was left in an unacceptable state, Harry headed to his cupboard to avoid being seen.
That night was both one of the best and the worst that he had ever had. So incredibly happy he was with discovering his gift that it almost made him cry tears of joy before the harsh reality set in that he just couldn't eat enough to support using it. For when the hunger returned later that night, Harry learned that no amount of wishing or want could make food appear to him out of nowhere.
And as the weeks and then months went by, Harry used his gift sparingly and only when it was completely necessary to make sure that he had achieved the ever-growing and ridiculous list of things that Aunt Petunia would ask him to do. Though Harry was very careful to never use his gift in front of them.
So it took him some time to work out the kinks and learn about the things that he could and could not do with it. But he only used his gift when he was sure that he would be able to properly feed himself afterwards since it had only taken him one night of what felt like he was dying from starvation to ever dare using it otherwise.
Fortunately, Harry soon got the chance to explore his gift more because he went to school for the first time. Harry had been looking forward to this as he had already taught himself how to read and write with what he had picked up from the hours that Petunia had tried teaching Dudley how to spell his name.
Now, there was some trepidation on his part as to how the teachers and the other children would treat him, and so he kept to himself the first day as he took in his new surroundings. Ultimately, however, he found that he didn't have to worry about that. The teachers were quite encouraging once he consciously demonstrated his excellence and they encouraged him to be the very best that he could be. And he excelled at that.
Only, it soon became apparent that he would need to be skipped a few grades because of how much smarter he was than his peers. In fact, it ended up being a blessing because Dudley was told by his parents that Harry needed special help because he was already behind and so it was one of the few times that Harry wasn't punished for doing something right. Unbeknownst to the Dursleys, that had been the exact reason why Harry had decided to reveal just how much better he was than the other children in the first place.
The only downside with going to school now was that Harry needed to get all of his work done and do all of his chores around the house at the same time. Which would have been impossible without the use of his gift to help speed things along. Fortunately, Harry was able to eat his fill during the school day, but even then he didn't get to eat as much as he would have liked since he didn't want to draw further attention to himself by eating twice as much as everybody else – for they were already older than he was!
Thankfully, he was still able to eat enough without it being overtly noticeable to get everything done at home using his gift. Another issue, but one that was made manageable because the Dursleys were at least smart enough to clothe Harry so that no one from the school ever questioned his appearance. Everyone soon assumed that Harry just preferred baggy clothing and he did his part to sell it by acting as comfortable in them as he could.
Though, this event did have the unexpected result of presenting Harry with the opportunity to perfect the art of fitting in. Slowly, he was becoming used to the many masks that he found were essential in order to make someone like himself, who had already been advanced several grades, to blend in without further standing out.
Though, it was difficult at first because there was always the risk that they would move him further ahead – on account of just how much smarter he was than everyone else. So Harry had to balance that every single day to remain where he was without arousing further suspicion.
But Harry would never regret first chancing the reveal of his intellect to escape Dudley's year, which he was reminded of each and every time that they had recess together. Harry had had several unfortunate encounters in which he had needed to endure bullying in the schoolyard. It only hardened him to other children in general, for he was certain that kids his age would just would never be able to accept just how much better he was than them.
Though, Harry did develop impressive self-control; for the amount of times that he was tempted to use his gift to teach others a lesson were too numerous to count.
However, one night just after he had started his second year of school, he simply reached his breaking point and first used his gift on another person.
Harry had known since he was four that the way that he was being treating was inexcusable. But when Petunia had tried hitting him with a frying pan for not caramelizing the onions long enough, he found that he just wasn't going to jeopardize his health or safety any longer. A frying pan could cause serious brain damage and Harry had grown quite fond of his growing intellect, even if he had been forced to somewhat downplay it at school.
After he had ducked and started backing away on the floor while Petunia started screaming at him, Harry rose his hands in front of him and wished with all his might that she wouldn't be able to hurt him with that frying pan.
Like always, he could feel his gift spread out from his center and it shot through his fingers with such force in his alarmed and angry state that Petunia was thrown backwards into the wall. She dropped the frying pan as her breath had been knocked out of her.
Vernon was quick to his feet and roared into the kitchen intent on teaching the little freak a lesson for what he had done using his unnatural behavior.
Though Harry was quick to recover from his shock at using his gift on another person and honed in again on his power to target his Uncle. Harry wasn't focusing this time on just making sure that he escaped Vernon's beating right now, but he wanted Vernon to never abuse him ever again.
So he wished and wished and wished for a way to change Vernon, to make him act differently so that he never had to deal with this again.
Even with the adrenalin that was running through him, Harry noted how different this sensation was from the one before. Instead of feeling the rush of energy as his gift left his fingers, this was more subtle as his gift left his fingers to do his bidding unnoticed.
It took a few seconds for Harry to notice the change in Vernon as he slowed his thunderous gait towards Harry and his face took on a docile, mindless air. His eyes had also become slightly glazed while Harry waited with baited breath for his gift to work.
By the time that Petunia was on her feet again, clamoring for the pan that she had dropped to give whack-a-Harry another go, Vernon was now an entirely different man.
He reached his hand out to Harry in the nicest gesture that he had even seen and quickly helped him to his feet while Dudley and Petunia looked on with a disbelieving expression.
"Are you all right, Harry?" his uncle asked in the caring manner in which he should have used since Harry's first day in their home.
"I'm fine, Uncle Vernon." He had responded slowly, gaining more faith that his gift had really worked with each passing minute.
"Vernon!" Petunia shrieked. "He ruined dinner … and … and did something freakish to me. Hit him now!" She cried, becoming completely flabbergasted as Vernon led Harry back to the table and began preparing a plate of food for Harry to eat.
While a place was set for him at the table, Harry held his hands before him and concentrated on that same exact feeling that he had used on Vernon for Petunia. It took the same amount of time, but like before, Harry knew at once that it had worked when Petunia set her pan down and adjusted her pearls before offering to bring in the pudding. All of the malice and hate was gone from both her voice and her eyes.
Harry had then thought to do the same to Dudley but there was something satisfying in watching the look of confusion and dread that soon gave way to terror on his face. So often had Dudley looked at Harry like he was scum and had so thoroughly believed what his parents had told him that he had recently taken to lording himself over Harry whenever he had gotten the chance.
And as Harry enjoyed his first proper meal at the Dursleys, his soul grew just a little darker than it had been before with his enjoyment of the gentle hushes that Petunia and Vernon gave Dudley when he cried out for attention, demanding that things go back to the way they had been. The boy had even tried to hand Petunia her frying pan back, but Harry's Aunt had simply put it away and had brought out more treats for Harry. Dudley had no idea what was going on and Harry found it satisfying to watch as their roles became reversed.
Over the course of the next few months, Harry found that he needed to keep using his gift to give his Aunt and Uncle a little refresher from time to time to make them remain in their nicer state. The first few times had been difficult for him to recreate since he lacked the emotional desperation that had made it so easy for him the first time. But eventually Harry had to just focus intently, more so than when he was trying to use his gift on objects, and concentrate all of his will to flow out of his fingertips.
In time, Harry was able to add specific requests to his gift and was very pleased when Petunia had so thoughtfully suggested giving Dudley's second bedroom to him. Of course, this just elicited another chorus of whines from Dudley, who was so thoroughly unhappy that he was becoming less spoiled with each passing day. Harry never thought that he would have ever gotten used to that noise – but he was finding that he thoroughly enjoyed listening to Dudley wail as he adjusted to his new world.
Harry had thought about using his gift in other ways on his Aunt and Uncle – to really get back at them - but what he really came to enjoy with this new arrangement was being able to do what he wanted and when he wanted to do it.
Being in a constant state of hyper-awareness, in which his main focus had been on just surviving the hell that living with the Dursleys was, hadn't left him much free time to develop his own interests. Now though, with an adequate space of his own he was able to get through his unexciting homework before working on things that truly enthralled him.
Like how he was finally able to start really exploring the limits of his gift. It was quite easy now for him to work in little suggestions to Petunia and Vernon, and his Aunt finally started taking care of the upkeep of the house again. It had left him with even more free time now that he wasn't asked to do the job that a parent should have been doing all along.
What was most enjoyable with his research into his gift was knowing that he now had the sustenance that he needed to be able to use it as often as he liked. Being in a semi-starved state for so long had really limited what he had been able to use it for, but now that he had his pick of the food in the house he readily dove into his work.
The potential to discover what he could do with his gift was vastly more important than using it to get back at his family. Of course, every now and then Harry was in the mood for a little payback and willed the Dursleys to watch him eat while they went hungry for once – just to know what it had felt like. They were also made to do everything that he had been forced to at some point over the years before he lost interest in subjugating them; something about it just wasn't a challenge anymore.
The amusing thing was that Dudley even followed along with everything after his brief stint of throwing tantrums, even though Harry had never put him under his spell – as he liked to call it. The boy may have been lazy and inept when his parents had allowed him to do whatever he had pleased, but he wasn't all that incompetent when he put in the effort. Harry only had to make the boy come around to his way of thinking and how life was going to be now, and it helped that Dudley grew to be terrified of him when he finally realized that his parents no longer catered to his every whim.
Therefore, Dudley went along with practically everything that Harry asked of him and found that as long as he gave Harry a wide berth – his life was not that bad. Well, it wasn't as bad as it could have been had Harry focused solely on revenge instead of cherishing that they left him alone.
And with the right portion control, Dudley had lost a lot of his baby fat and was even starting to put on muscle with the work that he did around the house. Which he didn't even seem to mind after a while.
Everything was infinitely better for Harry now and most nights he liked to feel his gift before going to sleep, getting it to the point where it gently hummed along his skin as he drifted off.
Though, everything changed the day of Harry's eleventh birthday when he received a letter inviting him to a school of magic.
Kind of brief, but hopefully I explained it well. I realize the whole underage magic thing, but even in the books it was inconsistent (disappearing glass in the zoo, anyone?).
Maybe wandless magic will be undetectable. Also, use of Harry's Imperius Curse will be addressed next chapter.
Next chapter is learning that he is a wizard and Diagon Alley/getting prepared for Hogwarts.
I don't particularly want to write it out (as I am sure we have all read enough iterations of Harry going there). Instead I want to spent time with other aspects.
Comments are appreciated?
