Ok everyone! I'm back finally! Sorry about the huuuuuge delay on this story! Literally my life has been taken over by nursing college, and my long distance relationship! But I'm writing to get away from it all and it's actually really nice, so I hope you all enjoy and aren't too angry with me for taking such a long ass time. Well at least there is only one chapter to this story so you can just re-read it if you want, also I'm going on xmas break in a week so I'll update soon! I promise! :) Enjoy! Also, WARNING: This chapter gets a little gruesome, sorry but it has to happen.
Chapter 2:
I opened up my eyes slowly to be met with complete darkness. I raised my head and groaned out. It was throbbing very badly. I looked around the trashed room and slowly got up. I yelped out in pain when my bare foot came in contact with the glass that was littered all over the floor. I blinked away the tears and rested my shoulder against the wall. I immediately regretted it as pain shot all the way down to the tips of my fingers. I gasped and stood straight again. I don't remember much from the night before, and honestly I really did not want to see the damage that was done. I slowly limped out of the kitchen and took a peek into the living room. It was dead and silent. Good, he wasn't home then. As I made my way up the stairs, I felt my phone vibrate. I groaned and stopped to lean against the wall again, ignoring the immense pain and pulled the pink object out of my phone.
"Shit is it really seven?" My eyes widened as I answered the call, already knowing what this was about.
"LUCE! Are you ok? Geez I've been trying to call you for the past ten minutes! You're late again you know, what's taking so long? Trying to look pretty for a special someone?" Natsu, his sweet and happy voice gave me warmth and comfort. I smiled and laughed lightly.
"Sorry Natsu, I don't think I can make it to the game today, I don't look, or feel too great." I said. He was quiet for a minute.
"What's wrong, you're never get sick, do I need to come into the house?" He question. My eyes widened in alarm.
"NO!" I shouted, wincing at the loud volume, I really do hope he wasn't home. "Lucy-"Look Natsu, the game doesn't start for another hour right? I'll be there I promise ok? I just need to shower and clean up the house a little, my dad accidently dropped a jar of jelly and it's everywhere in the kitchen." I said slowly making my way up the stairs, wincing with each step.
"Ok if you say so, do you want me to ask Erza to pick you up?" He asked. I was about to say no, but I actually wouldn't mind that, the quicker I could get away from the house, the better.
"Sure, tell her to pick me up at eight sharp." I said, with that I hung up so he couldn't ask any further questions. Finally I reached my bathroom and closed the door behind me. I glanced into the mirror and gave a huge sigh of relief when I saw that my face only had a scratch on it. But that didn't make me anticipate looking at the rest of my body. I slowly took off my sweater and tossed it aside. This time I winced. My stomach was covered in bruises, a really dark one right underneath my breast. He had kicked me there. My arms had cuts all over them from the glass he had thrown at me. I slowly unzipped my pants and examined my bruised and bloodied legs. My knees were badly cut up from kneeling on the broken glass. I nearly hurled as I realized that there were still some pieces stuck in there. I yelled out in pain as I pulled it from my skin and threw it in the trash. The wound started to bleed badly and drip down my leg.
"Damn him." I mumbled, holding back my tears. I turned on the shower and started to wash off all of the dried blood and clean up the newly opened wounds. As I washed my hair, I found pieces of glass clinging to some strands and it took everything in my strength to not just yank all of my hair out and leave it at that. After what felt like hours of trying to clean up my body, I got out of the shower and to my room to pick my clothes for the big game. Well, it was cold out, but I wanted to look cute for Natsu, maybe I could get his attention? I smiled softly at those thoughts. It's almost as if thinking of Natsu was my only get away, he was my light and savior from this dark nightmare. I turned on some soft music as I picked out my clothing: A striped blue and white sweater with white jeans, my brown boots and a blue scarf. I felt it was perfect for winter and it fortunately covered all of my scars and bruises. I heard a honk outside and I looked out the window to see Erza parked outside in her dark blue jeep. I quickly grabbed my purse and ran down the steps and outside. Goodbye hell house, for now.
"Hey Lucy, how was your movie night with Natsu?" She asked as I jumped into the jeep. She blasted the heat to block out the blunt cold weather. I blushed while I rubbed my hands together for warmth.
"It was really nice, same thing as usual though. We had a popcorn fight, I won, but Natsu will of course disagree with that." I said with annoyance. Erza just chuckled.
"Are you ever going to tell him?" She questioned. I looked over at her. Did she know?! "Tell him what?" I asked wearily. She couldn't possibly know that I was beat-"That you like him silly, you know, if I were him and in his position as best friend of Lucy Heartfilia, I would want to know something like that." She said. Whew! That's a huge relief! Wait what?
"What are you talking about!? Do you know something Erza?" I questioned narrowing my eyes at her.
"No I don't, Lucy, Natsu is seriously interested in Lissana. He really wants to date her, and what do you think could possibly happen if he did? He might not see you as often, you two could drift apart, you wouldn't be his number one girl anymore. You need to take a step and tell him soon! Otherwise you'll lose him all together." She said. Well shit, she had a point. But this sucked because it could possibly work out the same either way.
"But what if I do tell him and he does all of that anyways because he doesn't feel the same and then everything just gets really weird and-"Lucy, It's Natsu! He really cares about you, he would never just leave you like that for something stupid. It may be scary to tell someone you like them, but there is always something good that comes out of it." She said parking the car into the school parking lot. I sighed as we both stepped into the cold.
"I guess you're right, but when should I tell him?" I asked as we made our way to the football field.
"How about after the game?" She suggested. I suddenly felt really nervous. Was I seriously going to go through with this? But what would I do if I lost Natsu as my friend? I don't know if I could go living on, he's the only one who can keep me sane from all of the abuse I face from my own father. Before I could answer her, she dragged me into the sea of high school students and plopped me down next to Levy.
"Hey!" I said to my blue haired friend. We gave each other a gentle hug, thankfully, and started to chat about the books we were reading.
"Lucy, its Natsu." Mira said pointing to the field. I quickly turned my head to the football team and instantly felt my heart beat pick up as I spotted Natsu's jersey number in the huge pile of jocks. Number 28. We all suddenly started to scream loudly as the team ran onto the field confidently and started the game. After two and a half hours of many cheers and a few protests, the game was over, 57-3, we pretty much murdered them.
"Well Lucy, now is your chance." Erza said. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked over at me.
"Is she finally telling Natsu?" They all asked at once. I winced and nodded slowly. "Yes, now shut up before he hears you." I said. Instead of following what I said, they all pushed me towards the field in the direction of my affection. I nearly yelped out in pain because their hands had touched all of my bruises. But I held back the tears and found my way to Natsu. He was with his team they were all high fiving each other and drinking water and Gatorade. I kept my eyes glued to the pink hair in the circle. But his eyes suddenly connected with mine and he instantly brightened up.
"Luce! You made it!" He said rushing to me and pulling me into one of his bear hugs. Oh my god it hurts so much. I winced, tears were building up, but I hugged him back.
"Yes I did." I answered as he let go.
"You want to come get pizza with all of us?! I can drive you there!" He said excitedly. Well I guess I could just tell him in the car then.
"Sure." I answered. Worst mistake in my life.
"So why did your dad want you home so early last night?" He asked turning on the car. My body instantly stopped shivering as the heat blasted through the car.
"I'm not sure, he didn't explain why, but oh well, we will have our movie night next Friday." I said. Well hopefully at least.
"Of course, and for sure this time we will watch a scary movie!" He exclaimed. I laughed and nodded. Ok so how do I start this off?
"Listen Natsu, I've been needing to tell you something really important for a while now." I said peeking over at him. He suddenly pulled the truck over and put it in park.
"What's up Luce?" He said, giving me his full attention. I gulped, this was going to be way harder than I thought it would.
"Well you see, ever since our uh freshmen year," I froze, was I really going to tell him this? No! No backing down now!
"I-I had started to develop a crush on someone, someone really important to me, and now I love him, but I'm scared to tell him." I said. His eyes widened. Did he get the hint?!
"You love Gray?! No way! That's awesome! Two of my best friends dating each other! I need to tell him this as soon as we get there so I can hook you two up!" He said shoving the car into drive and sped down the street to the pizza joint.
"No Natsu! Don't do it! I don't want him to know that yet!" I exclaimed. Yeah, why didn't I tell myself that earlier, then I wouldn't be in this huge mess. I knew I shouldn't have said anything, why did I have to fall in love with a dense idiot?
"But why not?! You two could be an awesome couple." He said parking the car. Well that one hurt. It was obvious enough what his answer would have been anyways, I mean he is really excited for me to go out with Gray. I should have known better, of course he wouldn't like me. It was just too good to be true.
"Hey why do you look so sad Luce?" He questioned poking my side. I bit my lip to prevent the little whimper from escaping my mouth. He did it again, clearly not realizing that instead of making me laugh, he was going to make me cry from the pain. He was about to do it one more time but I grabbed his hand.
"Please stop." I whispered, my voice quivering. His eyes widened. "Oh my god, did I hurt you?" He questioned gently caressing my side. I pulled away from him.
"It's ok Natsu, you weren't, my side is just still tender from running into the counter." I lied straight through my teeth. But it was nothing new. I had been lying to all of my friends for three years about this, so why was it getting harder and harder to hide?
"But-"Come on, let's get inside before everyone starts to wonder where we are." I interrupted him. I stepped out into the cold and rushed inside the restaurant.
"Hey Lucy!" Gray shouted from across the room. I slapped my forehead, completely embarrassed now that everyone was staring at me. Natsu yanked the door open behind me.
"Luce, what the hell?" He questioned. I sighed and just walked away to the booth that our friends were all currently sitting at. I slid in next to Gray and just placed my head on his shoulder. He may not be the one I love, but he was still like a brother to me, and I needed some comfort, and not from the pink-headed buffoon.
"Lucy are you ok?" Gray questioned. His whole body was frozen. Wait a minute. I glanced up at his face and saw the surprise in his eyes, and the very light pink tinge on his cheeks. Oh my god! No wonder Natsu wanted to tell Gray that I "liked" him. Oh geez, this sucked major ass. I pulled my head away from his shoulder.
"Sorry, my head just hurts." I mumbled and reached for a slice of cheese pizza. I gave Erza a quick glance, and I could see the pity. It made me sick.
"Well do you want me to rub your neck? That usually helps me with my headaches." Gray offered. I looked over at Natsu who had just sat down. He look really confused and almost hurt that I chose to sit next to Gray instead of him.
"No thanks Gray, I'll be fine." I said giving him a small smile. Couldn't risk going through that pain. I have a huge bruise on my left shoulder blade, one touch and I'll probably start crying.
"Sooo-"Gray, Lucy likes you!" Natsu said, suddenly interrupting Levy. My eyes widened and I gave Gray a really quick glance. His mouth was wide open. He suddenly looked over at me.
"Natsu! What the hell?! I told you not to say anything!" I suddenly blurted out. Not "Gray, I'm sorry but I don't like you," or "Don't listen to that idiot, he has no idea what he's talking about."
"Is that true Lucy?" Gray muttered. I turned my head to look at one of my best friend's, who now currently thought I liked him. I bit my lip and glanced around the table for some help. They all shrugged. I suddenly just grabbed Gray's hand and dragged him outside.
"What are you doing?" He questioned. I took a deep breath. "I'm so sorry Gray, I didn't want you to get dragged into this. I tried to tell Natsu that I liked him, but he took it as me saying I liked you." I mumbled. I felt super bad now, especially since I just discovered that Gray had a thing for me apparently. Now I knew what it felt like to be on the other side. This must be what Natsu is going to feel like when I- wait, I'm never telling him I like him now! This is a terrible feeling, and I know exactly how Gray feels right now too. Damn it's like I'm in both positions right now. This couldn't get any worse.
"Lucy, its ok, we all know you're in love with him. Please don't feel guilty." He said placing a gentle hand on my shoulder. I gave him a shy glance.
"How long?" I questioned. He sighed and ran a hand through his black locks. "Damn, I don't remember, it's been awhile, but I already knew you had it bad for flamebrain, so I knew I never stood a chance." He grumbled. My shoulders sunk even further down, great this was just getting worse and worse.
"Gray-" I started, but I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to say. Instead he just pulled me into a hug. His heart was pounding a mile a minute, and his chest was moving up and down quickly. So I did the only thing that I could think of, I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him back. He gave the top of my head a small peck and then pulled away.
"Don't give me pity Luce, it will only make me feel like shit, I like you, you don't like me. So what, I'll get over it ok? Anyways I was thinking of giving Juvia a chance." He said, his cheeks turning a little red. I giggled.
"That's good because I think she has successfully burned a hole into my back." I said taking a glance over my shoulder. And sure enough, everyone was staring at us, Juvia especially, giving a rather evil look.
"Can I just do one thing?" He suddenly asked causing me to look back up at him. Why did I get the feeling I knew where this was going?
"Can I just kiss you? It's something I've wanted for a while." He confessed shyly. Well crap, should I do it? I mean it's only a harmless kiss, but I always imagined my first kiss to be with Natsu, but who knew if that was ever even going to happen? So instead of answering him, I got on my tip-toes and placed my lips gently over his. At first he was shocked and he then wrapped his arms gently around me and pulled me closer and pressed his surprisingly soft lips against mine. I was the first to break my own first kiss. Great.
"Wow." He whispered pulling away. I felt my cheeks burn so I turned away from him. "Thanks Luce." He said before going back into the restaurant. So now I was alone, outside in the cold. I stared up at the gray sky and sighed. When was I going to be able to be happy? I turned around and looked in again. Everyone at the booth was slapping Gray on the back, all of them laughing and cheering him on, one of those people being Natsu. I felt the pain go straight through my heart and vibrate all over my body. But I thought I was happy? I have so many friends in my life, and they all love me and support me. So why do I still have such dark thoughts? Why am I still tempted to pick up that knife, and pierce my skin with the cold blade? But what purpose do I have in this world? To be beat every time I see my own father? To only have my heart broken by the man I love to death? I fought back the tears I was holding in and held out my hand as snowflakes started to gently fall.
"Lucy." I heard Erza speak. I turned around. "What's going on? I can tell something is wrong." She said. I looked back up at the sky.
"Why do you think the sky cries Erza?" I questioned. I could tell she was confused with my question because she didn't answer me right away.
"Um, I'm not quite sure Lucy, don't you think you should come inside and-"It's because everyone can be lonely sometimes." I whispered before walking past her and going into the warmth of the pizza joint.
We sat in his car outside of my house for a good ten minutes, in utter silence. I was about to reach for the door handle before his hand grabbed for my arm. I winced, and hissed in pain as I looked back at him.
"What's wrong Luce? Did I grab you to hard?" He questioned, and before I could stop him, he rolled up the sleeve to my shirt. I yanked my arm out of his grasp and quickly rolled it back down over the many scars that littered my arm. He stared at me in bewilderment.
"No, you don't, you can't." He whispered. I looked at him confused. "Lucy, why the hell would you hurt yourself! You can't! It's not right, you are so much better than that. You're such a happy person. I thought I made you happy." His voice cracked, and I could see the tears threatening to fall. But he was wrong, those cuts weren't from me.
"Natsu, you have it all wrong, I didn't do this to myself." I said calmly. Crap, where was I going to go with that? I can't tell him how I really got them. He gave me a stern look.
"Well then tell me what it's from Lucy, I've got all day." He replied. I could tell his was frustrated and annoyed.
"Don't talk to me like that Natsu, you have no idea what I've been going through, so how should I expect you to understand my story anyways!?" I yelled. I suddenly got out of the car and ran inside, not daring to look back. I slammed the door closed, not even caring if he was home or not. A glass bottle was thrown right next to my head, but I didn't even flinch this time.
"Get me another beer, wench." His deep, dark voice growled from the shadows. I walked to the fridge and grabbed two bottles and walked out into the living room where he was seated at the dining room table, doing his 'work.'
"I said one! Do you not know how to fucking count?" He screamed throwing the bottle at me, I stood still, letting the glass hit my body, and the alcohol seep into the now open wounds. I bit back the tears, knowing they will only fuel his fire.
"So you think you're such a tough little bitch now? Not even daring to dodge? Well then, you little slut, I think you're ready." He suddenly stood up. I felt my heart drop. That was new. What was he talking about? He grabbed my hair and dragged me to the couch and threw me onto the hard cushions. Oh no, please god no, I did not want this to happen. This was my worst nightmare.
"Ah that look of complete and utter fear turns me on so much. But I'm afraid I'm not one to rape my own blood, buuuut." He drew out the last word as he motioned for someone to come here. I glanced up and saw that it was one of his clients. I felt the tears finally break the barrier and fall down my cheeks.
"Let's get started bitch." He said with a dark smile.
I woke up in so much pain. I shivered and wrapped my arms around my naked and bloodied body. I sniffled as I sat up and examined the room to see if they were here. Thankfully, the house was dead silent. I took that as my cue to get up and go tend to my wounds. Once I placed all of my weight onto my legs, I immediately collapsed and cried out in pain. More tears feel from my eyes. I had been raped, it finally happened, my worst and most feared nightmare had come true. I knew it was only a matter of time before he did that to me. Everything hurt, especially my abused lower area. I looked down and saw dried up blood that had previously dripped down my legs.
"Why me." I whimpered quietly, more tears falling from my eyes, and before I knew it, I was screaming and crying, not knowing what to do with myself. I wiped my nose and got up slowly, barely able to see through my own tears. But I managed to make my way up the stairs and into the bathroom. I nearly puked at the sight of my body. My thighs and hips were completely bruised and covered in my own blood. I had scratches all over my stomach and my breasts had bite marks all over them. So this is what a pathetic human being looked like? How was I still living in this life? How was I still bearing through all of this pain?
"Natsu.." I whispered, more tears pooling from my eyes. He thought I abused myself. He even thought I was a piece of trash. No one cared anymore, so what am I doing? Why am I still breathing? With that last thought stuck in my mind, I finally made my decision and threw open the door to the shower and grasped my razor tightly in my hand. I uncapped it and examined the glistening blade.
"You can't hurt me anymore you sick bastard." I whispered pressing the blade deeply into the skin of my wrist and I dragged it across the surface slowly to create a deep cut.
"Never again." I mumbled, staring at the blood that quickly seeped out of the fresh wound.
"Never."
Whew, that is one extremely deep and depressing chapter, I know, I'm sorry, but it has to happen, I'm sorry everyone. Well I've already started to write the next chapter, I'll try to have that out in the next couple of weeks I promise! Hope you all enjoyed! :D
