Tamaki

I had no particular interest when Haruhi first entered the room, besides the fact that I knew she had entered as a poor student. But my curiousness grew. And then I started to realize how much she was like Kyoya...at first.

She had dark hair, glasses, and dark clothes. She was quiet, wanted to study and off to herself. So, I changed my sights to her, because I thought I might have a chance. Of course I didn't realize that she was a she until a while after, but that really didn't matter to me. I just liked her because she was so much like Kyoya.

After a while, I noticed that she was different but still the same. I tried to pretend that she was Kyoya. It wasn't too difficult for me. And every time I smiled at her, in my head, I was smiling at him.

Kyoya seemed to become more distant and every time I tried to do something it seemed like I was hurting him rather than helping him. Haruhi tried too, but that didn't work either. I saw him watching the twins...did he like them? More than me? I wanted to know but I couldn't just ask. So I just watched him, hoping that I would be able to find the answer.

My days grew happier though, as I pretended that Haruhi was my true love. And soon I found that I was doing okay even when I didn't pretend that she was my love. I could just look at her and be happy. Of course, I wasn't sure yet...but I think I had started to fall for Haruhi...my daughter. And left Mother behind, though I hadn't meant to.

Kyoya

Was I being childish when I hoped that Haruhi would simply tell him to go away? Was I being envious when I watched her from a distance and hoped that she would fall to her death? Was I wrong when as each day passed I hoped that she would not show up for club so that I may have Tamaki to myself?

Even during summer break, I could not go a day without hearing Tamaki scream and worry about her. He called us all up because he didn't know where his daughter was. I shook my head, sighed then told him. Half of me knew that Tamaki would go out to see her, but half of me pretended that he would stay home.

I smiled after we got there. He was trying so hard to stay at the pension that he started to look cute and flustered. I had tried to forget that it was because of Haruhi. I complimented him that day...to Haruhi and even tried to help him win. Somehow though, the twins ended up being the victors despite my help.

I had always tried to show him that I loved him...in the smallest, secret ways I could. I could never be as open as the twins...no matter how much I had envied them.

But today, I decided I had to do something beside just watch and wait.

Tamaki

I was actually a little afraid when Kyoya told me he had to talk to me. Alone. He had his usual expression and those glasses that sometimes hid his eyes. I didn't know what was waiting for me. What had I done that deserved a solitary talking to?

He pulled me into a small room, a room he'd used more than once to talk to others in. And before saying a word, he handed me an envelope told me to read it then turned and walked away. How I had wanted to follow him then...but I obeyed. I opened that letter, unfolded the paper and started to read...

Tamaki,

I sincerely apologize that I was unable to speak to you.

A few lines were skipped then, as if to show his moment of silence on the paper.

I simply wished to tell you how much I...care about you. No...how much I love you.

That had taken up two lines, though it had barely needed one...and it took my breath away.

Ever since the day we met...I have loved you. My polar opposite. My beautiful king. I'm smiling now, as I write this, though I haven't smiled in what feels like ages. Your attention has been elsewhere lately. Need I even write where?

I knew, but he wrote it a few lines down anyway.

Haruhi...of course. But that is okay...you at least have been happy. I can see that and so can my heart. But today...today it fell and perhaps it was the last time. I do not feel it moving anymore. I do not know whether to call it defeat or heartbreak. I watched as the pieces crawled around, trying to form each tiny piece into the shape of my heart, but this time all of the feelings fell out and flattened them. This time I lost my emotions, my hopes and possibly even my love. But not my love for you. That is all that remains in that empty broken shell. But that of course is not to keep on living, to keep on breathing new air. My heart has waved the white flag, it has given up and since the heart is a vital organ, I must follow behind.

There had been no breaks in any of that.

I truly love you Tamaki, my king. I only wish that I had been able to tell you or show you so that I could have saved my heart.

Kyouya

I suppose he had changed his mind last second because that was not the end of the letter. My eyes were watering, but I forced myself to read on.

Maybe you will have read fast enough. Come and catch me. Maybe you can put my heart back together and I can go through another day...watching you be happy. And maybe I will actually smile today...if you can catch me.

I dropped the note when I read the last line. I didn't know where he had gone to...but I wanted to catch him. I wanted to put his heart back together and let him smile.