chapter 1: dollars umbitch

it wus finaly time four sekond yeer. So I went too da skool and saw da dumbledoor lettin everyone in an I sat down at da ravencow table with da gost Harry "hi" o said and he said "hi" bak. den da dumbledoor started speekin " dis yeer yo will,learn more advanced magik. but furst some words from magik president of the wurld. dollars umbitch" den a cracker lady who wore a pink presidential suit thatat was pink stud up "helo everyone. as you know I am magik president of da wurld and I herd that kids at hagwats wasn't getting quality edumacations. So I cam to enspect da skool" den she smlied "anyon who leaves da skool is going to magik jail for life. bye bye" gost Harry said "Wut was dat about" and I said "I dunno, she sounds stupid. I bet she only became magik president of da magic wurld by bein wite" and den we started eetin food.

meenwile, at da place were president umbitch is stayin in da skool

president umbitch tapped her magik wond and den a big square showed up an old man in a wheelchair and a red suit showed up on it. it was da deevil! "master I ded it. I am now lookin for it" den da deevil said "gud job umbitch. yur dooin a beter job den dem stupid deth eeters! now I'm torturin dem in hell."den da umbitch said " but miaster. i don't kno were da wiserd stone might have broken at. I need someone who does" da devil though for a moment before saying " sure Ill send sumone, after you get all da pieces of da wiserd stone, den we can get the rest of da dethly halows and all hell will break loose!" dey laughed evilly for a couple of moments. den umbitch turned da screen off

in hell. da devil went to da place where Vadermort was being tortured by having his intestines ripped out and strangled by them, while his arms are constantly ripping off his flesh and having it regrow while acid pours overs him and his flesh regrow a again, while having his memory wiped every few seconds so he never gets used to the pain. da devil said to da Vadermort "how abot I giv you a chance to redeem yorself?" Vadermort nodded a lot so da devil gave a thumbs up and all his torture stopped. Den he held up a locket and sed " dis is a horkruks, it has yuor soul in it, if you betray me I will destroy in and you can never come back ever. but if you obey me and da person I'm havin you work for den I'll give it to you and youll be invincible" Vadermrot laughed evolly"sure I'll do what you say" den he sed under his breth "but don't count out me betrayin you" den da devil opened up a portal and Vadermort whent into it, and den arrived at umbitchs room

To be continued...