Summary: Everything's going pretty smoothly for the girls until they get sucked mysteriously into a world of demons, danger and death pacts. Can Theoli and Isaviel handle the horrors of the Supernatural world? Or should we be asking if the Supernatural world can handle them..? (Here there be Parody-Sues! So watch your step ;D )

A/N: So here we go, the girls are about to meet Sam and Dean Winchester for the first time whilst they go snooping for clues as to how they ended up half-way across the world in a room with a dead guy! Fun times ahead for Theo and Isa!

Disclaimer: Nothing from the Supernatural series belongs to me. Isaviel and I apologise in advance for our bastardisation of this awesometastic series. Isaviel Bates and Theoli Runkle are self-insert original characters who belong to their respective real life counterparts. Also? This disclaimer isn't mine. I nabbed it form Isa with her permission ;D

Finally: I DO NOT CONDONE DRUG USE.


Suepernatural
Lord of the Pants.

II.

Come morning the girls had gotten stiff from posing and shining their awesome upon the world around them. It was, after all, tiring being made of such win as they were. They actually ended up sleeping the whole of the next day away in a motel room a few streets down from the Oxfam where they had clothed themselves. Theo had, to her exclaimed surprised, found several wads of cash in the pockets of her leather coat, leading her to believe that some shady mob type character had probably dropped the coat off at the store in a bid to get rid of evidence or something. To her, the Isaviel's trench coat had actually been lined in crack cocaine only added to strength of her theory. They proceeded to sell the white powder and found themselves absolutely minted. Meaning mainly that aside from being able to pay for food and a room to sleep in, also made them drug dealers, on top of potential murder suspects. Take the bad with the good I guess, but don't take drugs kids. Ever.

Across the street from the motel was a coffee place. After having slept for hours on end, a strange kind of lethargy having taken hold of them, they assumed the origin of which had to do with however they had gotten to Toldeo, Ohio in what had seemed like an instance, they managed to rouse themselves enough from their stupors to make it across the road to grabs something to eat. Theoli bought them both a Danish pastry and a cup of coffee while Isaviel nabbed a table out on the street in the weak morning sunlight.

When Theoli eventually got over to the table carrying her spoils Isaviel had a newspaper spread out on the surface of the table with a pad of paper and a pencil on to one side. "Anything?"

Isaviel looked up and took the coffee Theoli held out to her with a shake of her head. "Nothing," she said. They had been keeping their heads down after the whole crawling-out-of-the-window-of-a-crime-scene thing and had bought every paper they could get their hands on since that night. There had been no mention of murder, or even deaths with suspicious circumstances attached, and more importantly, no wanted posters with crude sketches of two certain females on them. Not that such a thing was likely to crop up given that they weren't in the Wild West and it wasn't the late eighteen-hundreds. Still. Theoli maintained she was keeping an eye on the telephone poles in the area. Just in case.

Collapsing into her seat Theo sighed heavily, taking a bite out of her pastry. "Thank god. I guess if they suspected foul play it would have been in the papers by now."

"Yes, thanks for that, Columbo." Isaviel laughed, but promptly stopped as a balled up napkin hit her in her face,. Sighing, she continued, "It could just be that the cops are keeping a tight lid on it for now, they won't want people panicking about some sicko running around murdering people for their eyes. Either way there's nothing that puts us in danger of being tossed in a cell. You know. Apart from the drug dealing."

"Hey, hey," Theo held her hands up defensively, "Needs must, dude. We're very possibly trapped in hell-"

"I told you, it's just America."

Theoli narrowed her eyes, "Whatever. We're going to need money wherever the hell we are, because sadly they still haven't made Awesome a currency you can exchange for items yet."

Nodding and shrugging at the same time, Isaviel looked back down at the paper, flipping back to the obituaries on the back pages. After a moment she let out a little noise of thoughtfulness and leaned closer to read the decidedly smaller news print.

Theoli, face covered in powdered sugar leaned forwards too, "Whut?" she said thickly.

Without needing to look at her friend, Isaviel picked up a napkin from the pile next t her coffee cup and extended it to the blonde, "This guy right here-" she straightened up and turned the paper around so Theoli could see what she was looking at, "- does he look familiar?"

"Oh hey! It's ol' No Eyes!" Theoli exclaimed, in the middle of wiping custard from her chin.

"Dude, indoor voice!" Isaviel hissed.

Theoli went a bit red and glanced around, but no one was paying attention to them, despite Isaviel's inexplicable new outfit. Apparently the sixties were coming back, and the young woman was making sure she was at the forefront of the new wave of fashion; a white, long sleeved turtleneck sat snugly beneath a loud orange and pink mini dress, white leggings disappeared into a pair of matching pink boots, complete with orange heels and lining. Theoli was noticeably still in a very similar get up to the one she'd procured the first night, all earthy colours; her leather jacket was quickly becoming her favourite thing in the world.

After reading silently for a moment Isaviel looked up, "Okay. So the funeral is this morning and they're having the wake at the house we had to break out of and escape before we were discovered with the blood of the deceased on us right afterwards."

Theoli nodded, slurping some coffee. "If they released the body to the family I guess they really don't suspect foul play." She said, relief washing over them both, visibly so with this in mind. It seemed that they really were out of the woods. God only knew how, their fingerprints had to have been everywhere in that bathroom, Theo could only guess that upon autopsy they had found nothing that could have indicated external influence.

After a few quiet moments in which her friend got to work on her own Danish pastry and coffee whilst scribbling down some notes on her handy pad, Theo leant forwards again, a serious slant to her tone of voice and expression. "What was him name?"

Again, without looking up Isaviel answered; "Shoemaker."

The image of his death was still so fresh and grim in Theo's mind she didn't even make that 'cobbler' joke that was on the tip of her tongue. "Poor sod."

"Yeah."

They were both quiet for a few minutes until Theoli rocked back in her seat, booted feet finding their say to the table, "So." She began thoughtfully, "We're gonna slip into the wake and look for the ouija?" She said, eyebrows raised in a slightly incredulous expression, "That sounds simple enough."

Isaviel shrugged, "The ouija won't be there, but It's the only thing we have to go on. We woke up in that bath tub. There has to be some sort of clue why."

Theoli nodded again, "Alrighty then." Another shrug, "At least we won't have to use the window this time."

II.

When they crossed the threshold of the house, the first thing Theoli noticed was that everyone was, of course, dressed in black. She shot a glance at Isaviel who had plastered a 'very sorry for your loss' smile on her features and didn't seem to have realised that her orange and pink dress was drawing the eye of everyone they passed.

Theoli leant to the side subtly, "Isa?"

"Hrm?"

"Dude." She hissed, "You stand out like Michael Flatley in a bar full of straight men."

Isaviel looked down at her dress and her boots and he white sleeves and leggings and then at Theoli, who while not in black, at least had subdued colours on. For a moment she made a face, it was going to be nigh on impossible for them to blend into the wake when one of them almost glowed with neon. "Hang on a minute." She said and darted out of sight.

Theoli was left standing on the spot, looking and feeling awkward. A few moments passed before she came back with a tailored black coat covering up her outfit.

"How..?" Theoli's eyes bugged as she took in her companion's attire.

Isaviel winked, "Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies."

Theoli punched her on the arm, snorting. It felt a bit weird to be more or less gate crashing a wake, but like she had been saying more or less since they had found themselves in this mess 'needs must'. They really had no other choice did they? This was the only like they had to where they were or why they were there and if they didn't investigate now they mightn't get another chance like it. They spent a few moments milling around and when no one seemed to be looking, stole up the staircase. The hallway stretched gloomily ahead of them and they made their way along it, peering into each room until they found the bathroom. What was presented to them was a grim reminder of what they had seen. The floor was stained a funny pinkish kind of colour, where the bloody pool had been a few nights ago. Both girls stepped tentatively into the room with equal frowns of distaste at being back. Despite that they got right into searching for clues. Anything that might tell them what had happened or why.

Theoli opened the mirrored cabinet above the sink and perused the contents while Isaviel bent over the tub, practically pressing her nose against the inside of it in case there was any clue to be had.

"So they're calling what happened to him a stroke." Theo murmured, picking up a bottle of aspirin from a shelf in the cabinet.

Isvaiel nodded and made an affirmative noise. In walking around the wake downstairs they had been privy to little bits and pieces of information; the elder daughter had found Mr. Shoemaker in the bathroom, surrounded by blood with his eyes more or less exploded. No suspicious circumstances. A tragic accident.

That didn't wash with the girls.

Isaviel opened her mouth to add to the conversation when they both heard footsteps out in the hall. Theo cursed under her breath and they darted behind the door as fast and quiet as they could move.

"The Bloody Mary legend," came a voice, "Did Dad ever find any evidence that it was a real thing?"

"Not that I know of."

The owners of the voices were in the bathroom now, Theoli was pressing her back into Isaviel, who was pressing hers into the wall. Sadly, this did nothing to camouflage them and the moment one of the men moved towards the bathtub they were spotted.

"Who are you?" The taller of the two men asked automatically eyes narrowed at the females and taking in their condemning clothing and huddled pose as to mean that they were as out of place at the wake as he was.

Theo sniffed, eyebrow rising; "You first."

"Look, half-pint." This time the other man spoke, looking down at Theoli with a smirk, "I don't know what you and your friend are doing up here, but this is a wake, Okay? People are here to mourn, so save your grim-ass curiosity for America's Most Haunted."

Isaviel stepped forwards menacingly. "We're not here to cause trouble, we're sorry that the guy died, let's face it no one wants to have go by way of exploding eyeballs, but this isn't any of your business so get out of the way."

"Then why are you here?"

"We could ask you the same thing."

Again the taller one of the two spoke, sighing slightly, "Let's just... not get in each other's way. We don't have much time up here and frankly, Dean, I don't care what they're doing here."

'Dean' gave the two young women another once over, causing the shorter to mutter something along the lines of 'pervert' under her breath before he nodded and they went back over to the sink. The girls went back to what they were doing, going as far as to re-examine the window that they had been forced to climb out of. Unfortunately they couldn't block out the conversation going on a few paces away, turning their heads to listen.

"All over the country kids play Blood Mary, and as far as we know no one dies from it." Tall-y McTall was saying.

"Well it maybe everywhere else it's a story but here it's real. The daughter's right; as the legend goes, you-know-who scratches your eyes out." Dean agreed.

Theo's mouth dropped open; "Voldemort scratches your eyes out?"

"Don't be stupid, Theo." Isaviel snorted, "He's the most powerful dark wizard, like, ever. I think he'd just Avada Kedavra your ass."

"True, true."

Dean and Sam blinked slowly at the girls, apparently unable to either follow their conversation or believe what they were hearing.

"That would mean, Bloody Mary scratches your eyes out." The taller interjected, levelling a look at them which said, 'duh'.

"Well according to the legend it, the person who says you-know-what gets it, but here-"

"Shoemaker gets it instead..."

It was fair to say that the girls were well and truly lost by this point, they looked from one man to the other with disgruntled, confused faces before Theoli piped up; "Who are you two?"

"I'm Sam. This is Dean. Your turn."

Isaviel narrowed her eyes, "This is Theoli, I'm Isaviel."

Before they could get much further introductions wise, footsteps in the hallway caught them all off guard and for a moment or two there were four flailing bodies and hissed voices as they tried to pile out of the bathroom before they could be caught. Alas. It was not to be.

"What are you doing up here?" the woman asked, narrowing her eyes at the four of them as they stood crammed in the doorway.

"We... We had to use the bathroom."

Theo smacked Dean in the arm and squeezed forwards from between him and the doorframe, "We're investigating the circumstances around Mr Shoemaker's death."

"What, are you cops?"

"Sort of."

"But... Donna's Dad had a stroke."

Isa snorted, also moving to disentangle herself and nodding towards the bathroom, "That usually the way strokes go? Liquefied eyes?" At that the tall blonde gave a shudder and reeled back a little.

Sam pulled a card out of his pocket, stepping forwards, "Look, we just don't want anyone else to get hurt. That's all. If you think of anything, if you or your friends see or hear anything strange then just call us. Okay?"

Charlie nodded, sceptically but looked over her shoulder, "Look, you should really go. If Donna finds you up here...her sister, Lily, she's been talking about this stupid game she and her friends were playing," she sighed, pausing as if to collect herself, "I just don't think she'd appreciate you guys snooping around..."

III.

They were forced to leave the wake together, the girls walking in line behind the guys as they descended the steps at the front of the house and made their way down the path. All four of them adopted a purposeful stride, looking like they knew exactly where they were going. Only Theoli glance back to make sure they weren't being watched. Sadly they were and as she turned back to Isaviel at her side as gestured to the two figures they were following; the blonde chick was staring at them as they walked away and for the sake of not getting into further trouble with the law, they would just have to play along and pretend that they really did work with the two guys who had been snooping around.

Turning right on the sidewalk they followed them towards a black car that was pulled right up to the curb. Sam was going for the passenger door already, apparently sulking.

Isa groaned as Dean fished his keys out of his pocket; "Oh Jesus, that shit-mobile is your car?"

Dean glowered at Isaviel, but before he could say anything, Theoli had pushed in between them, wide eyed and open mouthed as she stared at the slice of hotness parked not three feet away.

"Dude! That's you car?" Theo looked like she had died and gone to heaven, "I haven't seen a '67 Impala in this condition for, well ever!"

"Well, thanks, I actually-"

Theo's hand shot into the air, cutting off whatever Dean was about to say; "Shotgun!" she bellowed, making for the passenger side and shoving the taller dude out of the way as she went.

"Hey!" Sam rubbed his arm where the blonde had shoved him.

Theo beamed out of the window, already buckling her seat belt, "You snooze, you lose dude."

Isaviel opened the back door of the Impala and slid in smoothly with a distinct sigh; she seemed reluctant to touch the seatbelts back there and made a disgruntled noise that went unnoticed as Theoli was chattering away in the front about the dashboard, and the cassette tapes she had found up there. With her foot she moved a book out of her way in the footwell and gave a little shudder.

Sam looked at Isaviel with a grim smile, "We don't use the back much. Sorry."

Isa shook her head, "Nah, it's okay. You should see the back of Theo's Punto, swear to god there are rats back there."

Apparently this got her companion's attention, "Hey, hey. No harshing on the Punto, okay? That turd on wheels was my Dad's, it's not my fault he used the back seat as an oversized trash can."

Dean spoke up, turning in his seat as Theoli had done, interrupting the conversation; "We'll drive a couple of blocks up and then let to girls out." He said, seeming to have recovered some of his seriousness now that the chatter about Impala had been railroaded, "This isn't some game, okay? Some guy's dead and it could happen again any time. So you two ladies need to keep out of the way."

Theo's eyes narrowed and she turned her head slowly to look at Dean, almost as if someone had set her to slow motion. "What?" Beside Sam, Isaviel cringed slightly; Theo went on "Who died and made you king?

"Wait, what do you mean more people could die? Like the way Mr Shoemaker did?"

"Yeah," Sam interjected, trying his damndest to ignore the staring contest in the front seat, "We're... well, we investigate things like this, unexplained deaths. Mr Shoemaker's daughter said 'Blood Mary' in the bathroom mirror three times, and then her father died. His eyes were-"

"-gone." Theoli nodded, coming back to reality, "Yeah, we know."

"How?"

Isaviel sighed, looked at her companion in the front and at the nod gave a shrug of her slender shoulders, "You fill us in on this 'Bloody Mary' stuff and we'll tell you over coffee."


Reviews would be lurved ;D