Many thanks to Jenjoremy for the awesome beta job. I also owe SandraEngstrom2 and Gredelina1 endless love and thanks for helping me get this story written. You ladies are the best xxx

Thank you, thank you, you wonderful people. The response to the first chapter was more than I could have hoped for. I can't wait to see what you make of the rest of the story.


Chapter Two

When Bobby heard the rumble of the Impala approaching, he breathed a sigh of relief. He had worried Dean would never come back. That he would stay in that cabin with his brother's corpse forever.

Ellen glanced up at Bobby from where she stood against the wall. "He's back." she said quietly

Bobby felt like an intruder on their grief—Ellen, Jo, Ash were hurting more than him. He was in pain, no doubt about that. Sam was once his boy, and he mourned him, but he hadn't been Bobby's for a long time—not the way he was theirs.

He'd been thinking of Dean and how this was going to affect him. He'd barely gotten his brother back before he lost him again. Dean might be a different person now from the kid who had been left behind by John Winchester, but he still loved his brother and saw it as his responsibility to take care of him. It had been harder for him to take care of Sam when he found him again because Sam was capable in a way Dean wasn't, capable enough to turn that gun on himself to rid the world of the worst demon any of them had ever known.

It was going to ruin Dean.

Just then, he heard the Impala's engine rev again and then the skid of tires and the roar as it drove away. Bobby got to his feet quickly, barely aware of the eyes fixing on him with their confusion, and made for the door. Dean was leaving again. Maybe he'd realized he couldn't face their grief while he was so burdened with his own. Maybe he needed space. Maybe he was going to do something really stupid.

Bobby yanked open the door and raced out onto the porch. Dean and the impala were nowhere in sight, but he could hear him shouting his brother's name. Bobby raced toward the voice. He skidded around the corner of a stack of junkers and looked ahead. Dean was standing under the iron arch that proclaimed the name of the salvage yard. His hands were in his hair and his shoulders were shuddering. The car was nowhere in sight.

"Dean," he called.

Dean turned. "He left," he said miserably. "Bobby, he left."

"Who left?"

"Sam. Why would he leave me?"

Bobby staggered forward on numb feet, his heart aching. "He didn't have a choice, Dean. He had to do it. He couldn't have lived with himself otherwise."

"No," Dean shook his head. "He was okay. But he drove off."

In that moment Bobby knew something more terrible than what he had already lived through had happened. He felt sick with fear. "Dean… Dean, what did you do?"

Dean didn't even seem to hear him; he had turned back to the road, as if hoping the car would suddenly reappear.

"Dean!" Bobby snapped, grabbing Dean's shoulder and dragging him around to face him. "What did you do?"

Dean sucked in a breath. "I saved him. He's was okay. He was fine. But he left."

Bobby swallowed down bile. "Please tell me you didn't. Please, Dean, tell me you didn't."

"I made a deal."

Bobby's hands found the collar of Dean's shirt and gripped it tight. "What did you say?" His brain was refusing to accept what he knew he had heard.

"I made a deal," Dean said again. "I saved him."

Bobby shook him hard. "Why the hell would you do that to yourself?"

Dean's head flopped on his shoulders with the force of Bobby's desperation driven strength, and then he pulled back, out of Bobby's grasp. "Because it's Sam."

Fury built in Bobby's chest, making his hands fist and shake. "Are you that damn stupid? Do you even know what this means?"

"Of course," Dean said distractedly. "But it won't happen. Sammy will save me. I'll be fine."

Bobby sagged. He couldn't even think straight. Sam would save him? There was no guarantee of that. Sam would try, he'd try his damndest, but if he failed… "Dammit, Dean."


Ellen's grief was a physical pain. Sam was gone and she didn't think she'd ever recover.

She stifled a sob.

Jo got up from the couch where she had been sitting with Ash and walked forward, her arms upraised. Ellen stepped back. She couldn't bear to be touched.

Jo looked stricken, and another tear fell down her already wet cheek. "Mom?"

Ellen cupped her face in her hands, hating the contact but knowing Jo needed it. "I love you, Joanna Beth. I always have and I always will."

"I know," Jo said with a sad smile. She swallowed. "Sam knew, too. He knew how much you loved him, and he loved you"

Ellen nodded and dropped her hands to her sides again. Was that true? Did Sam know just how much he was loved? Did he die still resenting her for hiding the truth about Dean from him for so long? Was that bond broken? She hoped not, she prayed not, but she couldn't be sure. She thought she would give almost anything to talk to him one last time, to tell him he was loved, always had been and always would be.

Part of her wanted to be angry with him for what he had done to himself, taking himself away from them. A huge part of her was angry with John for molding the boy the way he had, making him think that destroying the demon was worth any price, including his life. She would take Yellow-Eyes in the world forever if it would give her Sam back. She just missed him so damn much and it hadn't even been a week. How was she supposed to live without him in her life? She wanted him back, glowering, moody, hardened; she would take any version of him she could get.

Ash cleared his throat and Ellen and Jo turned their attention to him. "Where's his… where is he?"

"He's in a cabin in Wyoming," Ellen said. "We left Dean with him. I thought he'd come back when I heard the car, but…" She shrugged.

"We have to go get him," Jo said. "We can't leave him there like that."

"I know, honey, but we have to wait for Dean to be ready. If we force this, he'll never get over it. He needs to face what's happened."

"You think he'll ever get over it?" Jo asked, sinking back onto the couch. "I don't think I will."

Ash took Jo's hand and patted it shakily. He was in shock, Ellen knew. He'd been a part of the hunting community for a while, but always on the periphery; he'd never lost anyone until now. He'd been innocent to that part of their world. Ellen hated that his innocence had been broken now, especially with Sam.

The door flung open then and Bobby stormed in with Dean following. Ellen had thought Dean had driven off again when she heard the Impala pulling away, but she guessed he'd only gotten as far as the road before Bobby browbeat him into coming back. Poor kid. His life had just been turned upside-down. No wonder he had wanted space. It was unfair that Bobby was pressing him into being with them, but she was glad in a way that he was back. Hopefully it meant he was ready for them to put Sam to rest. He needed that. It was a desecration of his memory to leave his body rotting on that bed.

As Dean came into the room, she got a good look at him, and she frowned. The man she'd left had been devastated, lost in his grief. Now he looked alive again. His eyes glinted and his face was flushed. He was happy. An inkling of suspicion crept over her. She was equal measures afraid—afraid to hope and afraid for Dean—and horrified.

"What happened?" she asked.

Bobby rounded on Dean. "You want to tell them or should I?" he growled.

Dean smiled, but he looked distracted as he glanced toward the window.. "Sammy's back."

Ellen sucked in a breath and fresh tears pooled in her eyes.

"How?" Jo asked. "Mom said she saw him die."

"Yeah, Dean," Bobby said bitterly. "How?"

Dean's smile didn't fade, and he seemed oblivious to Bobby's fury. His eyes swept the room and then landed on Ellen. "I made a deal."

Jo gasped and Ellen watched a tear roll down her cheek. It was easier to look at her daughter, at her relief and happiness, than it was to see Bobby's anger at Dean. The young man seemed calm, even happy; it was as if he was oblivious to what he had done and the consequences.

"You call that saving him?" Bobby asked.

"He's alive, isn't he?" Dean countered. "Why can't you see this is a good thing, Bobby? I got my brother back. He's alive! I saved him!"

"You think I don't know that?" Bobby asked loudly. "You think it didn't hurt me knowing he was dead? I care about Sam. I didn't want to see him end like that, but you sold your soul, Dean! You're going to die and go to Hell, and you act like you don't even care! And Sam. What do you think it's going to do to him when your deal comes due? You'll have years with him, I get that, but you'll ruin him when it's all over."

Dean finally looked uncomfortable. He cast his eyes to the floor. "Not years," he mumbled. "Year."

"What?" Bobby shouted, staring at Dean in stunned disbelief.

Dean looked up, and he looked angry now as well. "A year, Bobby. I got a year. It was the only deal I could get. I have a year and then the hounds are coming, but you know what? I would do it all again in a heartbeat, so you can shove your anger because I saved him!"

"Yes," Ellen said gratefully. "You did."

Dean turned to her, looking pleased that someone at least was sharing his relief. Ellen hated what was to come for Dean, but she couldn't deny her happiness. Her boy was back. He was going to be pissed as all hell and devastated by what Dean had done, but he would be alive to feel that.

Bobby glowered at her. "Sure, it's so easy for you, isn't it? You've got Sam back and the rest of the world can go to hell as far as you're concerned. I guess it's just those us that care about Dean that are going to suffer because of this, not you."

"Screw you!" Ellen spat, stepping into his space. "You think I don't care? You think Dean means that little to me? I care. He matters. I can just see through what he did for the gift that it is! Dean has done something amazing."

"Amazing for you, yeah. I'm the one that'll have to see him go up in flames!"

"That's enough!" Dean shouted. "I am not going up in flames. The hounds aren't going to come. Don't you know Sam at all? He's going to get me out of this, and we'll both be fine!"

"What did you say?" Ellen whispered.

"Sam's going to get me out of it," Dean replied. "He said so. I know the demon said…" He paled. "Oh God."

"What?" Jo asked angrily, getting to her feet.

"The demon said if I try to get out of the deal, Sam dies," Dean finished weakly. "But it's different, right? If Sam breaks the deal, it doesn't count."

"Dean," Ellen said in a measured voice. "Where is Sam now?"

"I don't know," Dean said, his hands going to his hair. "He just drove off."

And it didn't take a genius to work out where he'd go now. He'd be halfway back to the crossroads already, planning to get Dean out of his deal and probably killing himself in the process."

"Damn him," she breathed, making for the door.

"Wait!" Dean shouted. "What's happening?"

"He's on his way there," Ellen said, not turning as she yanked the door open. "He's getting his damn self killed."


Dean's knee bounced and his hands shook. Why hadn't he realized sooner? Where else would Sam have gone but to the crossroads? He had said he was going to save Dean, to break the deal, and Dean's absolute faith in him had made him sure he would do it. He hadn't been afraid because Sam would fix it. He would fix it, but it would come at the cost of his own life. Goddammit.

Ellen was driving them in her old Ford. Jo and Ash were still at Bobby's. They hadn't made it to the car before Ellen peeled away from the house and raced toward the road. They'd been left standing on the porch, watching after them.

"He'll be okay," Ellen said, taking a corner at speed. "He'll be fine."

She wasn't talking to him, she was reassuring herself, but Dean tried to take comfort in her words. If they were fast enough, they could get there before Sam did anything stupid, like get himself killed.

He thought there was a chance they'd get there in time, despite Sam's head-start, because the demon Dean had dealt with had been keen to gloat when he'd been trying to broker a deal. It would want to torture Sam, too. And he might not even find the right crossroads. He could get a completely different demon, if there was even a demon there. They couldn't possibly police all crossroads, could they? Oh god, let them get to him in time.

"Drive faster," he begged.

Ellen slammed her foot down on the accelerator and coaxed the smallest amount of additional speed from the engine.

"Where's this crossroads?" Ellen asked when they had crossed the state line.

"Near the cemetery. Take the first left after the gates and you'll see it. It doesn't look like a real road. It's just dirt and gravel."

Ellen nodded stiffly, and then swallowed hard. "Dean, you need to know we might be too late."

"I know," Dean said tensely.

"And if we are, you can't blame yourself. This is Sam's choice. He's the only one who can make this decision." It sounded as though it cost her something to say it, as if a piece of her was torn away with the words.

"I know," Dean said again.

She glanced at him then turned her attention back to the road, her eyes tight with pain. "And you can't deal it away again. They won't let you this time. You have to prepare yourself for that."

"Are you prepared?"

She shook her head. "No. There's no preparing yourself for something like that, honey."

"Exactly. So don't expect me to do the impossible." He clenched his fists. "Take that left."

Ellen spun the wheel and drove onto the hard-packed earth and gravel of the back road that led to the crossroads Dean had found.

Ellen slowed as the crossroads came into sight and Dean caught sight of the unmoving form in the middle of the point the roads crossed paths. He jumped out of the car, running forward shouting his brother's name, even though he knew it wasn't Sam on the ground. It was a woman, the woman that had hosted the demon he'd dealt with. As he skidded to a halt at her side, he saw that there was a perfect bullet wound on her forehead. The dirt was scuffed beside her and Dean knelt and scooped out the loose earth.

"He's not here," Ellen said behind him.

"He's been here though," Dean said, pointing at the devil's trap. "The tin's gone, too." He straightened and brushed his hands down on his jeans.

"This is good, Dean," Ellen said. "He killed her. He drove away. When your dad made his deal… well, he was still here when we tracked him down. Sam's not."

"How do you know he didn't kill her after he made the deal? How do you know he's not running from the hounds right now?"

She shook her head. "I don't. I just know he's not here."

"Then where is he?"

Ellen considered for a moment and then nodded decisively. "He'll go home. If he failed, he'd want to be alone rather than face you."

"And if he succeeded?" Dean asked. "If he's already dead?"

"I don't believe that," she said. "I think he's at The Roadhouse. Come on." She tugged on his arm. "Let's go find your brother."


Dean sighed with relief when The Roadhouse came into view because the Impala was parked out front. Ellen mimicked him with a sigh of her own as she pulled the car to a stop and climbed out. Dean was a step ahead of her. He was already at the door, pushing on it. It was locked though. He turned to Ellen who jangled a set of keys in her hand.

"Hunters don't like hearing the word no. If the door was unlocked they'd have come in and helped themselves to my liquor. Sam's smart enough to know that. Come on round back." She led him to the rear of the bar and unlocked the door to the kitchen he'd been in a few times with Sam.

Ellen pushed past him and hurried through to the bar. Dean followed her, eager to see Sam and afraid in equal measure. He wasn't entirely sure he hadn't broken the deal. This could be one of the last times he saw him if not the last itself. Or he could have failed and Dean could still be heading to the rack. He was desperate for the first option. He wanted Sam to live.

Ellen came to a dead stop in the doorway for a moment, and then she walked forward, saying, "Sam," mournfully.

Dean looked past her and saw Sam sitting at the corner table he usually favored. There was an almost empty bottle of whiskey in front of him. He looked up as they came in and Dean saw the bleary look in his eyes. He was wasted. More than that, he was devastated. He looked worse than he had in that cabin when he'd cried.

He looked Dean in the eye. "It didn't work."

Dean felt a wave of relief. It hadn't worked. Sam was going to be okay. He wasn't going to die to save Dean. That fate was thankfully still on Dean.

"It's not the end though. I got a name." He slugged back the contents of his glass and stared out at the empty bar. Ellen moved to his side and threw her arms around him, her face buried in his neck and her shoulders shaking.

As if Dean needed further confirmation that he had done the right thing, here it was. Ellen was crying with relief at Sam's return. It was worth it for her, for Jo, and for Dean. He had saved Sam for them all.

But when Sam locked eyes with him and said, "I will fix this," Dean nodded, though in the deepest, darkest recesses of his mind, he began to wonder.


So… Poor Bobby's heart is breaking and Ellen's is flying. Bobby's reaction is not because he doesn't care for Sam, it's just that Sam hasn't been his in the way Dean is for a long time. It will be returned to in the next chapter. I know there wasn't much plot progression in this one, but I thought we deserved to see the news of Sam's return reach the rest of his family. Things will pick up next time.

Until next time…

Clowns or Midgets xxx