To clear up a few things:

lowercase speak is Ichigo, but not really Ichigo; not quite. These aren't inner thoughts, people can hear them perfectly fine.

Italics is Ichigo's thoughts

'These markings with italics represent the people speaking through that loudspeaker'

O

O

O

let us play now i chi go

X

MALFUNCTION. BY. IMPERVIOUS MARR.

X

II. UNDERMINE

X

See these scars?

"People's gonna make a mess outta you," Ichigo hummed, folding another paper crane after his quick shower. "Gonna make a mess, mess outta you."

He worked on double time, now that they could take him out at any moment. He had to finish this pet project of his before they did that. He seriously doubted that they'll let him play with his collection of paper cranes once he's been assigned to that mission everyone's making a big deal out of.

"People's gonna make a mess outta you."

But it must be pretty bad to rely on a madman.

"Gonna make a mess."

Even if said madman was gonna complete this job no matter what.

Bbbbecause, Motherrr thosefuckingBASTARDS

"Mess outta you," he emphasized, viciously, almost ripping the paper apart. He eventually threw that crane aside, and started on his new one. He only had less than five to go, for one thousand, for a stupid anything-you-want wish.



'Kurosaki Ichigo.'

"People's gonna make a mess outta you," he whispered, almost wildly, as he almost feigned ignorance and sped up on his crane-making. "Gonna make a mess."

Four.

"Mess out of you."

'Kurosaki Ichigo, we know you can hear us.'

"People are going to make. A mess. Out of. You," he murmured, haltingly and haltingly as the seconds ticked by and he slurred it less and less.

Three.

'You understand that we are to chain you before we let you out.'

"Going to make a mess," he repeated, eyes going wide.

Wider. They were getting angrier and he was getting more restless.

Two.

I wish -

'Kurosaki Ichigo, we will come in now. Please understand that we will have to make you unconscious before we cuff you. You are, after all, the best in the business. We can't take any risks.'

They've always chained him down when he was unconscious because he was sleeping. They never really tried restraining him forcefully while he was awake. And they really shouldn't.

they shouldn't try that, huh, ichi-go

He snarled at the nightmare voice.

"Mess out of you."

One paper crane left, and zero.

make your wish, pretty boy

The door opened with a SLAM and he screamed and he was immediately grabbed at the head. Before they could slam his head down or inject him with those fucking drugs, he spun around with a great force, and slammed both his hands on the guys face. His nails, jagged from bite-maintenance, dug onto the guy – wait –

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"



Woman's face he felt the flesh beneath his nails, felt it tearing like paper

I wish for the world–

And he tore it straight off.

- to fucking burn.

x

x

"Gonna ma-a-ake a mess, outta you. Make a mess, out of you. Outta you. Out of you.

K-tak, tak, tak. K-tak, tak, tak.

Ichigo looked up from his little drum solo and grinned at the audience slyly.

"Well, well, well, well." He mocked in the tilt of the head and through his smile. "What a pleasant surprise. I didn't expect them to send in another team. I guess they realized I can't go down by force – unless you wanna drug me again? You don't want a scar on those baby faces, ladies and gents."

They left him in the room after they found out that he just couldn't be held down by drugs. That, and they gotta treat the lady who tried to drug him.

The bloodstains were still there.

I guess they're doing it differently.

"We'll have to take you to the vice-commissioner, Mr. Kurosaki. We would like the procedure to go as smoothly as possible," the one woman in the group said with a strained voice and the strained smile. She was clearly resisting the urge to just take up the stunner strapped on her waist, crank it up to the maximum level and slam it directly into his chest for an instant kill.

He could see it, he knew that she wanted to do it; she could see it in his eyes that he knew.

little upstart

Ichigo smiled as sweetly as he could to express an unnatural kind of cruel.

"I'm sorry, not lady – still a little girl, aren'tcha? Not gonna piss in your panties, heh? You're dealin' with the great Kurosaki the psychopathic murderer who's gonna get ya in yer sleep," he whispered fast, then placed a finger on his lips. "Hello, little girl. Call me I chi go."

It only took her three seconds to look away. Not quite fast enough; she's intrigued. The rest of the team simply shifted uncomfortably.



"Please, Mr. Kurosaki. We would like the procedure to be as smooth as possible. Please follow the instructions. We're now convinced that you would come willingly if we don't use force – now please hold up your hands –"

"I can see it in your eyes, you think I'm fucking, fucking fuck fuck fuck insane," Ichigo accused, pointing. "Just like everyone else. Just like you and me and the whole fucking world, but I'm not insane. I. Just. Live. In. A. Different. Dimension."

She took a step back, hand to the stunner. The rest followed, whispering "He's approaching he's approaching" to their little microphones wired all the way to the control room.

"I know you're stressed, Mr. Kurosaki, but you have to –"

"Stressed, she says!"

but you're just thinking

"Of the same things –"

that everyone else seems to think

"About me –"

about me

"Without really looking straight at the problem," Ichigo said, with an odd undercurrent to his voice, and the girl pulled out her stunner without hesitation, because Ichigo paced towards her during those few fucking terrifying sentences and he simply looked blank and she powered up the device, while Ichigo grinned.

He willingly placed his hands down, tilting his head in a sudden bout of impatience.

She took a second to look.

"Hurry up and cuff me, girlie."

She took the next half to lock him in chains.

"T-Thank you," she said mechanically, hypersensitive and shaking from the fright.

X

He looked at Ichigo once and found that it was hard to look away.

"You look fucking happy to see me," Ichigo said, grinning mockingly. The chains encircling his wrists burned into his skin and hung like a heavy burden. Then the nightmare spoke.

it's been a long time, byakuya



He tightened his fists.

"I see you haven't changed since the last time I saw you," the man behind the desk murmured, eyes narrowed. He didn't particularly rise up to the bait, so Ichigo jutted out his lower lip in a display of disappointment.

"And you've gotten mellower. What's up with that?" Not waiting for an answer, he slammed both his fists on the table in a display of random violence. The man jerked enough for Ichigo to notice, so he grinned. "That look suits you."

Byakuya was glaring.

"Maybe we aren't particularly inclined to play one of your childish games at the moment, Ichigo."

"And I'm getting bored fast. Now get on with the fucking briefing before I hightail outta here in the next minute," Ichigo shot with a flat look, tilting his head. Then his eyes widened, teeth showing up a few seconds later. "But I'm curious. How's Rukia baby?"

Byakuya quickly swore silently, rising from his seat. He absolutely refused to deal with the man, but as it was, he had no choice. But there was no way in hell he was about to like this!

"Do not talk about my sister," he said coldly, letting his weight rest against the desk.

Ichigo smiled cruelly at the display of attempted intimidation.

"You don't do that. You do this. So how's Rukia baby, Byakuya?" he asked, and laughed when Byakuya didn't grace him with an answer. "Did she scream for too long? Do you remember what Ichigo did to her?" he asked sweetly, slipping back into a mask of innocence.

"Does she remember what Ichigo did to her beforehe got locked up in the lonely, lonely room…?"

Byakuya grinded his teeth.

"They're bound to have a video. I'm sure you watched it. I can't remember how many times I broke her bones again and again – I'm sure you counted the times. I wouldn't be surprised."

His fingers were white from pressing onto the surface.

"But I'm surprised you're SICK-" He snarled, before slipping back into demure tones – "Enough to send her in after what Ichigo did to her pretty soul," Ichigo murmured and smirked and Byakuya visibly flinched, restraining from launching himself at that –

That –

A million things came rushing through Byakuya's mind relentlessly.

X



"It's a nightmare coming to life."

x

"Nii-sama, I volunteered for this." She closed her eyes and opened them again, as if it was the most painful thing in the world to even think about. "Just let me go. I'll be fine. I know I was in intensive care because of him but… I need to know if he's still in there – and I was his best friend before it all fell apart – so – I just -"

x

He tried too hard to understand why Rukia kept on coming back.

x

"I know, all right! I know the damage – I was there – I was the one whose body was broken and you don't know my pain; how it hurt so fucking much, okay!? I watched that video. Ichigo wasn't himself. He has a – monster in him – but it's not him, I know this!"

x

Her unwavering determination wavered.

x

Her wavering determination broke.

"Why would Ichigo do such a thing?" Rukia whispered, looking to the side – and then she immediately she snapped, scratching the side of her face relentlessly. "Let me gouge my eyes out, I don't want to see! I DON'T –"

Then she suddenly laughed.

"You're right, Nii-sama. You always were. I'm such a fool for even thinking that he might be in there somewhere."

x

And Byakuya remembered the last time he encountered Ichigo before he was locked up. He grinned at him unnaturally; his brown eyes more of a golden color, his skin unbelievably pale and the sick toothy smile that took over half his face when he saw the older Kuchiki. When he spoke, he didn't sound the same.

hey, you

how's rukia baby? after what I did to her...

she must be having the time of her life in the ICU



thinking why little ichigo did this and that

That –

"She should be feelin' lucky. I fucking treated her to a free show of her own," Ichigo said carelessly, breaking through Byakuya's muddled thoughts.

"You sick fuck," Byakuya hissed, narrowing his eyes.

Ichigo's face was blank. "Don't you know it," he mouthed so quickly Byakuya didn't catch that, but he definitely caught the next words because Ichigo spoke it as if anyone did to a child who didn't understand.

His voice dropped down into a slow, steady burn.

"Reality ain't too pretty either. And as always, like I do to everybody else –"

Ichigo leaned in so close, Byakuya could almost taste death.

"Let's do this again. How's Rukia, baby?"

And when Byakuya punched him on the face, Ichigo laughed himself to tears, almost scratching in more scars on his skin.

Ichigo straightened, licking his lips.

He held up his hand – not to touch the bruise – but to find the wetness on his cheeks.

"So that's where they've been," he murmured, holding his hand up to see the light shine on the tears.

Byakuya merely looked at the man –

That thing –

And turned away abruptly.

Looking at the man now, it was hard to associate him with the elite all those years ago. The man before was all warm and bright.

Now he was a cold shell of himself, but still dangerously lethal. Those eyes teased and taunted, lashes dipping with a grace that both chilled and intrigued the man. It was awfully hard to look away.

"You disgust me. Follow me to receive your next assignment, Kurosaki Ichigo," he said coolly, steeling himself and then walking away.

But nonetheless – Ichigo noticed everything.

He smirked.



X

X

I want to run.

I want to run.

I want to run.

X

X

what a beautiful dream, what a beautiful scream you've got there

why are you hurting my sisters

question is, why are you hurting your sisters

"You're not me…" Ichigo murmured. Everywhere around him was dark with no scent and no sound. He knew he wasn't awake. They took him to the briefing room and left him at a spare bedroom to rest because he starts tomorrow. He hit the bed and instantly fell asleep.

So he knew he was unconscious. Because he felt different when he was asleep. Because he wasn't the same when he was unconscious – he acted differently outside since everyone thought he was insane. But among all the signs, of all the things, it was because of

Him;

- that carbon copy opposite of him who was in monochrome colors. His hair, his eyes, his grin grin grinning grin that was death incarnate. The nightmare that wouldn't go away.

They faced each other in that plane which was dark and noscentandnosound, like they always did every single time he fell asleep.

A fucking reoccurring fucking terrifying bad, bad, bad dream.

"You keep on telling everyone and everyone that we're one and the same but you're not me you're not me you're not me."

His voice rose up a notch.

"Why can't you go away? You fucking nightmare, why can't you leavemealone?"

Ichigo grinned bewilderedly, tears gathering at the corner of his eyes since he can't cry when he's awake.



"Why me? Why not anybody else? Everyone now thinks that we're the same but we're not and they can't even hear me scream in here so why only me?"

The albino with the golden eyes simply stared. Ichigo needed a million words to convince his own self that he and he were different. He, on the other hand, only needed four words to convince the man otherwise. So he gave a grin – the same, psycho grin mirroring Ichigo's own deranged expression.

because

i

am

you.

X

X

X

X

A/N: Hi! :D

The guide above is for the ones that might cause confusion oO my writing style is just the way it is. For anything that's not capitalized, or positioned in strange places, or just plain wtf, are wholly intentional! Unless I really miss them.

Enjoy, read and review thank you :D

Actually, to be honest, I don't even have a solid plot for this one… I just wanted to see how far I can take Ichigo's mind and BURN IT mwahahaha. So that's why I'm not focusing on the others… I'm sorry. ;A;

Actually I'm very sick right now… And I wish to finish the other stories' chapters too. UU I'm working on them, I really am. I'm supposed to be having exams now too…

Have a nice day, everyone, and stay healthy!