Jimmy Doherty could hardly breathe as he stared at his ex-wife. In all their short marriage or even in the time afterwards, he had never seen Kim so quiet. She looked liked she'd given up, sitting there on the sofa, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders and her long hair falling across her tearstained face, void of all color. "Oh God." He clamped his hand over his mouth. "Oh Kimmy…" Time seemed to slow as he stood there frozen.

Alex looked up at him from where she sat next to Kim, one hand firmly rubbing her friend's back. "Jimmy," she hissed. "Jimmy please come over here." He shook himself back into reality and crossed the room to where Kim sat.

"Hi Kim." His voice was soft and he sat down next to her. She didn't respond at first, just sat there staring at a spot on the wall. He closed his eyes tightly for a moment and took a deep breath. He could hardly stand to look at her; she looked so far gone, so helpless. Please, Kim, let me in. "Kim, please look at me." He reached out touching her shoulder, and moved his hand up to brush against her cheek. She blinked slowly and tilted her cheek ever so slightly against his hand. "Kim, what's going on?" Kim turned now, facing him fully, her face pained.

"Jim..my…" Her breath caught as a sob rose in her throat. "Jim..my….Jimmy…." She stared down at her shaking hands. Why wouldn't they stop shaking? "I'm so sorry. I…" She couldn't find the words, couldn't speak.

Jimmy wordlessly covered her hands with his own. Relief spread over him at the sound of her voice. Thank God. "Hey none of that sorry business now," he gently chided her. He let her sit a moment before saying gently, "Kimmy, what's going on?" Please God, let her tell me. He was vaugley aware of Alex getting up and heading into the kitchen as he waited patiently.

"I just….I….miss him so much. It hurts so….bad." She felt the tears beginning to run down her face but she didn't even bother wiping them away now. "He…I should have…done something Jimmy…and now I…nobody understands and nobody….nobody….I should have saved him…I should have. I miss him….so…..much. I forgot Joey today and I…..it hurts…I close my eyes and I see….I see him when….his eyes, they…." Jimmy didn't say a word and Kim felt him tense; she closed her eyes tightly afraid that he was mad at her for forgetting Joey and for being such a problem. Her chest tightened again and she began to breath faster, her body desperate for the air it couldn't seem to find. I can't breathe, she realized.

"Kim. Kim." Jimmy's voice was suddenly loud in her ear, rising above the roaring. "Kim, breathe. You have to breathe." Why did he sound so loud?

"Kim. Breathe in and out. Slowly. You're hyperventilating. It's alright you just need to calm down." She recognized Alex's voice and turned her head. Alex smiled and nodded. "See, you're okay just breath slow."

Kim struggled for what seemed like hours but was only minutes before her breathing began to slow and the world stopped spinning. She leaned her head back exhausted and felt someone's arm go around her and pull her close. Jimmy. She let his hands pull her close and let her head fall to his chest. "I'm sorry." She whispered finally, her voice barely audible.

Jimmy looked down at her and shook his head. "Don't be Kimmy." He closed his eyes tightly and ran his hands gently over her hair as she began to drift off to sleep. He looked at Alex his fears reflected in her eyes. If she hadn't seen it, he realized with a start, he never would have been able to hold her again. He was just now finding out how much he'd missed that. As her breathing began to even out he kissed the top of her head. Finally sure that she was sleep, Jimmy sighed softly and whispered, "Where do we go from here Kimmy?"