Title: Carpe Diem
Pairing: Joshua x Neku
Rating: NC - 17 (In later chapters - as of now, it's only PG-13-ish)
Summary: After a year of undisturbed peace, a freak accident drags Neku Sakuraba back into the hectic and dangerous UG. This time, however, the stakes are higher not only for the fourth-time Player, but the Composer as well.
Comments: Joint 'fic between Caitlin ( feverishlove on LJ)

and myself. Prepare for a decently long fic, 'cause we're probably already 6 or so chapters in, and still going.

WARNING
: Joshua and Neku start out IC, but start drifting slightly OOC as the fic goes on.

--oo0oo--

Carpe Diem
Capitulus Duæ

Sanae grinned at the smile Neku gave him, nodding a bit before taking his leave, leaving the two alone. There was plenty to be done in the River in such a short amount of time... and if they needed Neku to fully cooperate, it wouldn't be a bad idea for him and the Composer to come to an understanding. Though with the way Joshua handles himself with these sorts of situations, leaving them alone for any period of time could certainly make things worse, too.

Ahh well, it was as good of a gamble as any.

Neku cleared his throat once they were alone. "Uhm...need anything?" he suggested and averted his gaze awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. Stay cool...stay cool.

Joshua blinked, confused at the sudden turn of events, and the heavy air that was set about them. How long was he out? Surely not that long... "Nothing I can't get myself." He replied stubbornly, in no way surrendering to the fact that he had a moment of weakness. Joshua Kiriyu was never weak. Being shot was just a simple miscalculation - a minor setback. He was essentially fine, just... his chest hurt a bit. And he coughed up a tiny bit of blood. Big deal.

As if to simply emphasize his statement, he reached a hand out in a lazy fashion, before a towel that hung near the sink (which had half of the contents that were spilled out of the cabinet above it) tugged away from its resting place, and simply flew into his hand, where he promptly cleaned the blood off in a dignified manner.

"Thank you," Neku mumbled at last, eyes cast somewhere else as his hands laced reluctantly in his lap. He wasn't one for gratitude but Joshua had saved him from dying in more ways than one. Especially back there with the angels. So a thank you was in order. He doubted Joshua would accept it because, well, he was just that kind of person, he supposed.

A holy arrow cast down from the heavens to kill him didn't faze him in the slightest - no no, but any show of gratitude from Neku, after having been shot twice by his own hands, having harbored such immense hatred towards him, that was what finally shocked Joshua into making probably the most unbecoming expression. He looked at the brunet, whose gaze was set towards the hands in his lap, with a completely dumbfounded expression.

"...What are you talking about, Neku?" He quickly covered up his shocked state with his signature smile, his words mocking and slightly sadistic - same as always. "Have you finally lost it? I was wondering when that'd happen. Coming to the UG four times could have that effect on humans."

Neku twitched. "Why can't you, just for once, accept someone's thanks?" he demanded and threw his head up, eyes locking harshly onto Joshua's. There was no way that Joshua could still be so damn smug about everything when he almost died himself. "And I'm perfectly sane, thank you. If anyone is crazy it's you for messing with beings like that," he muttered and folded his arms stubbornly to his chest.

"Messing with who now?" The silver-haired Composer played dumb. It was a perfected skill, after all. "Honestly, I haven't the slightest clue of what you're blathering about."

Neku twitched some. Fine then. If Joshua was going to treat him this way, he would as well. He narrowed his eyes. "Why are you such an asshole, Joshua? You almost died and you don't seem at all bothered."

"But I didn't die. It was a slightly miscalculation, but well within the limits of my plan." He replied with a steady tone, looking back at Neku's glaring gaze with calm blue eyes. "I have a goal in mind - nothing can stop me when I have my mind set on something. You should know that better than anyone." He smiled, giving the brunet a knowing look.

He couldn't take this mental and verbal abuse. "Why did you do it, Josh? Why did you put yourself in harm's way just to save a nobody?" he muttered and averted his gaze, not understanding this at all. If Josh saved him, why was he treating him like garbage? Did he want him as a personal plaything?

Joshua's smile fell slowly, but didn't disappear altogether. "You're not a "nobody", Neku." He stated simply, as if it was something he should have known already. "You're my partner. Do I need any other reason? I thought that was something you learned during your previous time in the UG."

"You could have died yourself out there but you choose me over yourself. Why? This wasn't like what happened with Sho. You could have died," he emphasized and stared at disbelief at Joshua.

Finally, Joshua's gaze fell more solemn, and for once, he gave Neku a look that wasn't demeaning or mocking. It was the look of someone who actually understood the brunet's emotion, his anger, his confused state. He was actually looking at Neku like an equal.

His gaze turned away slowly, searching around idly with his mouth partially open, just like a child who couldn't find the words to say something worth anything. "If... I had to choose," He replied softly, looking up just slightly towards the door Sanae walked out not all that long ago. "I guess... it would be, because you were the only person to treat me like a friend ever since I died."

"Joshua..." Neku was having a hard time coping with how serious and calm the other was acting. He bit his lip and sat there, uncertain what to say. Had Joshua just told him that he valued him as a friend and not just some plaything he had used as a proxy? He eyed the male for a moment and then laughed quietly under his breath. "I...still haven't forgiven you entirely, quite yet, but I do trust you, Josh." He was uncertain how meaningful his words would be, but they were the best he could come up with--the most he would allow from himself at that moment. And they were all true.

"Well of course," He stated with a giggle, playing with a strand of hair, though he still seemed more reserved than usual. "Who else are you going to trust? Your choices are pretty slim to begin with."

"Let's just...get you better and focus on this week, hm?" Neku suggested awkwardly and paused. He reached out and placed a hesitant hand over Joshua's forehead. He casually played off the action a moment later with, "Good, you have no fever. You are resilient."

The silver-haired boy blinked, taken aback by the simple touch, unexpected but not unwelcome. His gaze fell once more, before a pale hand slowly came up, fingertips touching the back of Neku's hand just barely, before placing his palm over it softly. It really was unfair, wasn't it? His fingers curled around Neku's hand slowly, his eyes lidding as he tried to hide how scared he really was.

"I'm...sorry." He whispered, voice barely audible. "...I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I wanted to... I saw the car, I knew you were there, but...I couldn't..."

Neku blinked in surprise. What?... "Joshua?..." He had been there? He had seen it? And more importantly, Joshua's smug demeanor had fallen and, his hand... Neku glanced at their hands, not moving his away. He stared at them for a brief moment before looking back to his partner with concern.

"...No one could have saved me, Josh. I was careless. I should have paid more attention," he admitted and shook his head. He didn't know what to do. He just sat there for a moment, battling with indecision. His fingers hesitantly linked with Joshua's, his heart increasing its rate.

"I'm the Composer. I have such immeasurable power... everything in Shibuya is mine to control." He replied with a small laugh, head lowering as his grip on Neku's hand tightened. "...But I couldn't stop one single goddamn tiny car. If only I had been in the RG... I wouldn't have had to pull you into this mess. I..." He laughed again, voice straining just slightly. "I guess I really am powerless, after all. The one time it really truly mattered, I couldn't do anything..."

"It wasn't your place to do anything," Neku decided and uncertainly brushed his thumb along the cool, soft back of Joshua's hand. "But hey, at least I got to see you again, hm?" he suggested and awkwardly laughed some, uncertain why he was suddenly so damn nervous and stumbling for words. This wasn't him.

There was a long, uncomfortable pause as neither of them could think to say anything else of worth, Joshua refusing to let go of Neku's hand the entire time. He wasn't sure why himself, but... it was somehow comforting. Just knowing that Neku accepted him enough to-

"Hey you two, fin-" Sanae propped the door open with his foot, one hand holding a bag that was slung lazily over one shoulder, the other still holding a cigarette - a new one, but it wasn't at all surprising, considering he could go through a pack in thirty minutes. Being dead did have a few of its positives.

Like, not keeling over after holding one's breath for too long.

Neku's hand, which had apparently been clutched almost desperately in Joshua's, was flung to the side like it was acid. The Composer sitting on the couch then rubbed his face with his forearm hastily, and he coughed, trying to hide whatever it was that made the tension in the room so high. But, for a split second, he saw it.

Joshua had, for but a moment, tears in his eyes.

Joshua.

Was crying.

Dear lord, it was worse than he thought. The world as they knew it was coming to an end.

"S-So, how's Sir Hole-in-His-Chest?" Sanae asked Neku with a carefree grin, as he walked over to set down his bag on the counter.

"I don' t have a hole in my chest." Joshua snapped back.



Neku eyed Mr. H and then Joshua for a moment. He had seen the change, the unusual look on Joshua's face, and the change of emotion and currency in the room. He had felt the tension in the deepest pit of his stomach and heart and in the hand that had once been in his partner's. Something had occurred to Neku, but he couldn't distinguish what it was. Perhaps that...this moment had proved Joshua human, just like everyone else? Or was there more?

But that honesty in his eyes...everything Joshua had done for him. Neku tossed Mr. H a warm, welcoming look before glancing back at Joshua. He made a move to fix a cushion or whatnot on the couch for his partner but instead murmured towards his ear, "I think …I forgive you." He pulled back and folded his arms to his chest.

"You sure were quick," He offered to Sanae.

"Didn't take all that long to find what I needed..." The cafe owner replied idly, leaning on the counter and taking another breath from his cigarette. "Plus, the GameMaster has sent out Reapers like crazy, looking for the "rouge player who smashed through nearly every Wall in Shibuya". Good job keeping a low-pro, Boss."

"Conductor will fix it." Joshua replied in a stubborn tone, still looking away from the both of them, completely taken aback by Neku's statement. He must have heard wrong…right? There's no way Neku could have forgiven him. "Besides, there's more at stake here at the moment. We've got more important things to worry about."

"More important things? Such as?" Neku was curious and he figured he'd talk to Joshua some more once Mr. H left, or until they figured out what their first day mission would be, if they got any. He sighed some and leaned back, watching Sanae with a calm expression despite how badly his stomach was churning. His hand that had been in Joshua's still was a bit numb and he hadn't the slightest idea why.

"Such as finding out what to do about the Angels that are coming to dethrone Joshua." Sanae replied calmly, but it was obvious he was anything but. "It seems pretty dismal, but fundamentally, we've got just as good of a chance as beating them as they do us. Especially since we've got one hell of a Player here to back us up, eh Phones?"

"...Speaking of which, has there not been a mission set for today?" The silver-haired Composer turned, sitting up as best he could, flinching only slightly this time. It hurt still, but it was more of a dull pain now.

"No, there hasn't - I'm sure because of the commotion you caused." The older man pointed his cigarette at his Boss. "You sure are wreaking havoc on your own Game."

"They probably won't issue one for another hour or so, I guess," Neku mumbled and rubbed the back of his neck before glancing up at Joshua, eyes softening just a fraction as he sat there. "If it's not that hard of a mission, I can go do it myself. I mean, we still have a pact so I don't see why the noise would attack me," he reasoned.

He paused and then just stared back at the Composer, as if something about him had suddenly caught his full attention. What exactly, he wasn't too sure of.

"You think I'll let you out of my sight just like that?" Joshua gave him a bit of a smug grin. "And what if a Reaper got you, hmm? You wouldn't be able to fight without me."

Neku smirked quietly to himself. Was there...a slight fondness in those words? "The Reapers can't attack until the last day, remember? They wouldn't suspect me of anything without you lingering about," he answered just as smugly. His eyes, despite his smug words, were oddly soft and...understanding?

"Touche." The Composer replied smoothly. "Still, you're not stepping foot out of this cafe. Can't have my little proxy running off just when things are getting good."

Sanae silently rolled his eyes. Would it kill the kid to, just once, say what he's thinking without wrapping it in something demeaning?

But Neku was slowly, ever so slowly, catching on. "Getting good? Well, I wouldn't want to miss all the action out there," he reasoned and proceeded to state, "Then again, if my partner wants me to stay, I will," he concluded with a small twinkle in his eye. He wasn't sure what the underlying things were in this conversation but...his hand was still numb and that intrigued him.

Neku was obviously a good deal braver than he was just an hour ago... he wasn't sure why, but it irked him. He wasn't used to his partner talking to him in such a manner. Still, it was also at the same time... a little refreshing. Kind of like how things used to be back in the second week Neku was in his Game. "I would like you to stay, Neku." He admitted with a bit of a smile, obviously not used to ... not demanding things out of people. God, this was weird.

"I've figured it out." Sanae slapped a hand on the counter. "This is all a dream. Some crazy mixed-up world where Joshua has lost his mind. It's Armageddon. Ragnarok. The Apocalypse."

Neku passed a glance over to CAT and snickered quietly under his breath. "...If this is a dream, it's pretty messed up, huh?" he decided and looked back to Joshua with a small smirk. "Then perhaps I will stay," he decided and folded his arms casually across his chest. "Only if you let me sit on the couch as well. This floor isn't that comfortable," he pointed out and shrugged his shoulders.

"You, Sanae - shut it. And you, Neku - stop encouraging him." He frowned, before laying back down, and stretching his legs so that he covered the entire expanse of the couch. "We don't let animals on the furniture here. Deal."

"Oh for heaven's sake Boss, stop-"

"If I did anything for heaven's sake Sanae, we'd all be screwed. Now let me have my fun and toy with my proxy."

Neku was going to have none of that. "It's Neku," he retorted stubbornly and got to his feet with a slight stumble. "And second of all, if that's the case, I don't see why you're on the couch either." And he promptly shifted his body ever so slightly so he was laying, practically on top of the Composer with a smirk. "So deal," he concluded and laced his hands together on top of Joshua's chest carefully, not bothered one ounce by this form of torture he was bestowing.

Joshua's eye twitched, looking much like a cat who had just been rubbed the wrong way. With a very wet hand. "You will get off of me this instant." He stated firmly, and simply. "Before I make you get off. I guarantee it will not be pleasant."

"Make me?" Neku chuckled sarcastically and hummed some, looking as defiant and simple-minded as ever. "Partner, I don't think you'd push me off. I'm supposed to trust you, and I trust you not to chuck me off you and break my back." Absently his hands became unlaced and he rested comfortably, his eyes drifting to meet Joshua's as his hand fell to the side between the couch and Joshua's body.

"I'll break more than your back..." He mumbled, looking positively irked. Frighteningly enough though, he began to grin, and lifted a hand just barely in front of Neku's line of vision, and it began to glow with a faint white light. Soon enough, Neku would find that he was practically frozen.

"Keep using your powers like that and they'll find us much sooner." Sanae sighed and lit another cigarette, fingering through a book he brought back with him.

"Oh I don't need to use much..." Joshua's grin just got even wider, his other hand lifting, fingers curling as if playing the keys on a piano. On the other side of the room, the ice machine on the fridge began to whirr.

When he felt every single cell in his body cease movement temporarily, he couldn't help but mentally flail. He tried to move his leg but it wouldn't budge. And then he tried to cock a brow in confusion but that was also impossible. His eyes stared widely, caught in that position at the composer.

'He wouldn't...He wouldn't kill his partner after bringing him back...' He eyed him, trying to move but finding it impossible yet again. What had he done to him? He didn't remember Joshua having these kind of powers before? And now he was slightly terrified...

And all he could do was almost shamefully plead with his eyes. How...shameful.

"Ohh, you're so adorable with that look, Neku" Joshua just grinned his signature grin, moving his fingers yet again, and eventually... the hem of Neku's pants tugged up at his back, but thanks to his frozen state, he couldn't exactly see what was going on.

If Joshua's stare could have been more evil, it would have been. Because not two seconds after he let him sit there wondering, he closed one hand, letting Neku regain control over his body, and the other flicked a singer finger... before a handful of ice cubes were shoved down his back and into the rear of his pants.

Neku yelped at once, the sudden iciness on his back causing him to tumble off the couch, smash into the floor, and curse wildly. He began frantically trying to dispose of the damn ice cubes and glared up at Joshua. "The hell is your problem?!" He barked and continued fretting over his now cold and damp body as he still attempted to rid himself of the ice. God damnit.

"If this is your good side Boss, I'd hate to be the receiving end of whoever really pisses you off." Sanae mumbled, reaching over and throwing a towel at Neku to help him dry off - though thankfully, he didn't really get all that wet since he wore rather loose shorts and the ice fell through quickly.

"Oh come now, you can't say that wasn't the least bit funny." Joshua giggled, obviously enjoying himself.

Neku mumbled and cursed under his breath as he cleaned up some, kicking a random ice cube aside. Thank god it hadn't been under his boxers...then he would have positively ripped Joshua to shreds.

"You just wanted to sneak a peek at my ass," he muttered sarcastically and finished up with the towel before tossing it onto a random chair and looking up at Joshua, rubbing his back painfully.

"You? An ass? You're so bony I doubt you'd have anything to show." Joshua replied with a snirk. "Unless you're just looking for an excuse to get naked in front of me..."

"Could you two lovebirds keep the bickering to a minimum? Trying to read here." Sanae gave them both a pointed look.

Neku paled at that and bit his lip. He was silently shushed and couldn't think of a single witty comeback. And the worst part was that a red hue had appeared on his face. At first he was about to shout that they weren't and for Joshua to cut the shit out, but he was rendered speechless...because Mr. H, of all people, had been the one to say that.

"I can't help it everyone wants a piece of me," Joshua overdramatically placed the back of his hand to his forehead in a feminine manner. "It's a curse, being so goddamn sexy." He obviously hadn't taken Sanae's comment to heart - or at least, didn't act like he did.

Neku finally regained his composure and rolled his eyes. "Sure, Josh. I'm sure your feminine body has all the guys hollering in lust," he muttered and folded his arms to his chest, eying the silveret with a cocked brow. "I mean, who wouldn't want a guy who giggles like a hormonal female?"

"Oh my, are you hitting on me Neku? I'm much too old for you. I'd be cradle-robbing." Joshua turned to his side and grinned. "But I suppose if you beg, I'll let you lick the bottom of my shoes."

Neku rolled his eyes. "Like I'd ever want your scrawny body," he huffed and ran a hand casually through his hair. He glanced back up at Joshua on the couch, eyes filled with something he wasn't even sure about. "If anyone would be doing the begging, Mr. Composer, it'd surely be you."

"Mm, I'm sure. Because you certainly weren't begging me a moment ago on the couch." His smile turned slightly more sadistic, blue eyes watching him with a somewhat dangerous expression. "It was so cute, Neku The way you pleaded at me with your eyes when you couldn't move... I really had you terrified for a moment there, hm?"

Sanae silently flipped a page in his book, eye twitching. These two... he didn't know which one was more immature. He'd be pestering them both to concentrate on the problem at hand, but really, there wasn't much either of them could do right now... and he supposed Joshua needed this. He'd never seen the boy smile so much before. In a sick, twisted way, he was having fun.

"Cut it out," Neku grumbled and shoved upward at Joshua's arm. "Need I remind you that you don't have the best track record when it comes for me?" he suggested and then allowed his arms to slouch back down across his chest. "And don't deny it, Josh. You liked having me on top of you like that."

"That's it. You two are bugging the absolute shit outta me. When you two are done flirting, I'll be out in front." Sanae grumbled and grabbed his bag, stepping out the door, relieved at the quiet solitude the front counter brought.

Joshua giggled as his Producer walked out the door. He'd only seen Sanae truly that annoyed a handful of times... oh well. This just suddenly got twice as fun.

--oo0oo--