"I suppose that was the first major, or any, bonding experience we had together, but the second time we were forced to be together wasn't as perfect as the first."

...

"Brian, will you watch Stewie for a minute?"

"She needs a break every once in a while. Of course I'll do this for her."

"Sure."

"& please keep a close eye on him. Remember what happened last time."

"I know, I know, don't remind me. Don't worry, there's no way that'll happen again."

...

"Ah, yes there you are. Oh, you people at the industrial adhesives corporation certainly know how to make a tasty glue. Well then, let the banquet begin."

"Oh, god, Stewie you idiot!"

"Oh, woah, what the hell are you doing? Don't eat that!"

"Oh for God's sake, don't be such a nerd."

"A nerd? Right, so I'm a nerd because I don't want to get in trouble with Lois because the baby ate glue while I wasn't looking."

"Look, I'm supposed to keep an eye on you. If Lois sees this she'll kill me."

"I'd like it if he let go of my hand."

"You can let go of my hand now."

"Well I'm not the one holding on to your hand."

"You can let go of mine."

"No way, that glue's stuck to our hands, & it's binding us together. Okay, okay, calm down. On the count of three, pull as hard as you can, & it looks like he's thinking the same thing. One, two, three!"

"We're still stuck! Let's just see what that container says. Hmm, Never comes unstuck!"

"Oh..."

"Crap."

"If Lois finds out, I'll be dead."

"Ok, we can't let Lois find out."

"Right... So how do we make her not notice?"

"Looks like we're fine for now, she's over there talking to an old friend."

"Then lets look into an antidote before one of us has to use the bathroom."

"Good idea."

...

"Ok, thanks."

"Good, so acquiring an antidote won't be as hard as I thought, but in two weeks..."

"Well?"

"Well, the good news is the same company makes a solvent that'll get us unstuck. The bad news is it takes two weeks for delivery."

"You're telling me we're stuck like this for a bloody fortnight?"

"If that means two weeks, then yes, but how will we keep this from Lois for two weeks?"

"You can not tell Lois about this."

"Oh, & what if I do."

"Don't worry yourself, I've already planned for that."

"I'll show her those pictures of you wearing her wedding dress."

"You said there was no film in that camera!"

"There was film in that camera, I just thought it'd be a good opportunity for something to hold you against. Oh, crap, there's Lois! Just act natural!"

"Come on, Stewie, it's time to change your diaper."

"I can't leave his side, I literally can't. I'm just gonna have to watch very closely."

"Uh, mind if I watch?

"Ok, but that's a little creepy."

"Um... I just want to spend more time with the newest member of the family."

...

"& I'm just ashamed of myself, Brian, that I let Peter's jealousy prevent me from rekindlin' old friendship just because it was with a man."

"This is so awkward. I've never seen Stewie in the buff before. Oh, well, just focus on what Lois is saying & you'll be alright."

"Yeah, Peter's not exactly the most understanding when it comes to you & other men, like that time at the movies."

"That was embarrassing, but, that was also Peter."

"& when you went to that concert."

"That was also embarrassing, but, I'd still expect that from Peter."

"& then there was last Saturday night."

That one I can't blame on him as much. I sometimes mistake seeing myself in the mirror as another dog."

"I can't let Peter's irrational emotions run my life. I'm gonna call Ross & see if it's not too late to take him up on his offer. Would you mind finishing up?"

"Gross, but still, she has enough work to do."

"Uh, Sure."

"Yes, yes, do you like cleaning my doody Brian? Say it, say it, say, I like cleaning your doody Stewie. Hah! Don't forget the taint."

"I think I might just vomit. I'll have to power through it. FOR LOIS!"

"You know, this would be easier for the both of us if you'd shut up."

"Oh, I'm sorry that Lois left you in charge of cleaning up my discharge."

"Of course."

...

"Ah, morning, time to clean myself. Oh, the baby's waking up again, I want to see his reaction to this."

"Ugh! What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Come on, I know you're just one, but you're amount of knowledge greatly surpasses that. You should know exactly what I'm doing."

"I'm cleaning myself."

"You were clean 15 minutes ago, now you're just on vacation."

"So, what? I can't just clean myself as a dog?"

"No, no, I'm saying that you already finished up with the "cleaning" aspect of that, & now you're just going into overtime."

"You're smart, just find a way to ignore it."

"Just, look away."

"Fine, but I better not see you going to town on yourself the next time I wake up."

...

"Just what I need, a cop to see a dog holding hands with an infant while driving. That's sure to make his day."

"Oh, crap. Alright, let me handle this."

"You were going 65 fella. That's ten miles over the... Why are you holding that infant's hand?"

"Called it."

" Oh we met on the Internet."

"Not helping."

"Shut up."

"Yes, he lured me down to the park with promises with candy & funny stories."

"I hope he's one of the people who can't understand the talking baby. If he does, I seriously will look like a pedophile in court."

"Officer, you ever hear of that super industrial adhesive?"

"Actually, yes we have."

"Oh, God, I didn't even notice the other guy glued to his back! Either way, looks like he'll understand."

"Sorry for bothering you."

"You better keep your mouth shut."

"Oh, yes, God forbid another cop pulls you over only to discover he isn't alone in the super industrial adhesive world."

...

"We had to take a shower eventually, no matter how wrong it felt."

"Oh, get my back, would you? Oh, that's it. Ooh, that feels good."

"This is already hard enough for me. Can you stop turning this into more than a shower?"

"I'm sorry, it just... it feels really good."

"Let's just... let's just get this over with."

...

"I need to get my laps for the week."

"Oh, come on, couldn't you skip this week & the next?"

"There's no way, it's one of the only things I do to stay active."

"Nope."

"How am I supposed to breathe?"

"Just take a breath when I lift my hand above the water."

"On your mark, get set, go!"

"Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!..."

"Just a little farther... &... Done."

"Oh, God blast it would you hold it for five seconds? Gasp... Gasp... Gasp... Gasp... Okay."

"&, back to the other side."

"Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!... Gasp!... God, it feels like we've been doing this for ages! How many laps have we done?"

"One."

"Blast!"

...

"The antidote should be here any minute now."

"Wait, there's a mosquito on my martini."

"Aah! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Sorry, I just forgot that there was a baby attached to my hand. There's the mail truck..."

"Hey there's the mail! Oh, finally. Once we get this on, our hands will be free."

"Good, I'm tired of waking up in a bath of saliva."

"Yeah, yeah, nobody cares."

"Alright, it says it takes an hour for the solvent to take effect."

"Well, let's see, what takes an hour."

"A lot of things... Just pick one."

"We could watch Rita Rudner do five minutes of stand-up."

"I don't usually do things that are a waste of time."

"Ba-zing."

"Or we could just go for a walk."

"Fine with me."

...

"Why are those people looking in that well?"

"Hey, what's going on?"

"There's a little girl down in that well."

"Oh my God!"

"Unfortunately, nobody's arms are long enough to reach her, except that one guy, but he's helping that woman tickle a midget in a tree."

"That's unfortunate, but... We can save her."

"Oh, God, you want to rescue her, don't you? Ugh, it's times like this I wish they'd use me for stem cell research."

"Help me!"

"It rubs the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again. Ha!"

"Okay..."

"Alright, I'm gonna lower you in."

"I just noticed, how often do you see a 17th-century well in this day & age?"

"That doesn't matter. We need to hurry, if we don't hurry, we'll have to little people stuck in a well."

"Hurry up! The glue's wearing off!"

"All right, all right!"

"Come on! Almost there... Got her!... & we're unstuck!

"We did it!"

"Job well done!"

"& we're not stuck together anymore!"

"Thank God!"

"You said it!"

"Now... it just doesn't feel right."

"Do you want to hold hands on the walk home?"

"Yeah, sure."

"That feels... right. Like our hands were meant to fit together. He may put up a tough front, but he's a good person at heart."