I watched as teal colored waves crashed against the golden grains of sand, turning white as they bashed against it. I could almost feel the breeze grazing softly against my skin, If only it was real. I had always loved the water and the forest but the first time I saw the beach I had fallen in love with it. Yet I had never gotten the chance to see one close up. To swim in the salt water, feel the grains of sand sticking to my toes. It was something I had regretted not doing and now I was going to get the chance.

The chime of the dinner bell pulled me away from my own world, mandatory for the tributes to attend on the first night after training. Sighing, I sat myself up on the bed taking the remote off the nightstand I turned the screen off. Revealing the city lights of the capital contrasting against the dark that surrounded it. Standing up, I walked towards my bedroom door running my fingers over my scalps, brushing my back trying to make my slightly messy bun look neater.

I walked through the sitting area by the looks of it Arken had already made his way down to the dining hall. Reaching the main door I looked down at the rack of shoes; they had doubled since yesterday. No doubt Rizzel's attempt to make me wear shoes other than in the Training room. She was the closest thing I had to entertainment and I was going to milk it the best I could. It was better than nothing since these could be my final days. Opening the door, I continued my way out of the apartment and got into the elevator .

I made my way to the back corner of the elevator, my stomach slightly turning. I wasn't sure if it was the confined space of the fact I was suspended 11 floors in the air. One of the two things that made me feel sick to my stomach. I wasn't a fan of certain motions and elevators held on of my Achilles heels. Pushing the main flood button I leaned against the wall watching as the arrow started to move downwards. The elevator came to a stop on the 7th floor, my eyes darted to the door immediately. Johanna strode into the elevator giving a partial smile to me. I was relieved that it was her and not someone who would be out to kill me once the games began.

"Pascale" her voice was friendly yet somehow cold.

""Johanna" I greeted her with a smile

Johanna simply nodded and turned her back to me facing the doors, even without her Axe she was intimidating. When the door's opened on the bottom floor Johanna exited quickly and I followed suit. Stepping out of the elevator, I got two steps before falling onto my face landing with a thump. It was so unexpected I didn't really get a chance to break my fall. I could taste the metallic liquid seeping from my lip as I pushed myself up onto my knees. I knew I was weak but I wasn't his clumsy.

"Oops, you should really watch where you're going" Cashmere voice was fake as she bent down to help me

I tried to pull myself away from her deny her help but it only cause her to grip my arm tighter. She jerked me up roughly pulling me to my feet; I could feel my heart pounding in my chest my eyes darting around. The area was completely abandoned except for Cashmere and I. Johanna had already went through the large door that lead to the dining hall where everyone else including the peace keepers were located. I was dead. I was too scared to see if there were any cameras littering the walls but hey, as far as I knew this was more entertainment for the game makers.

I could only bet Cashmere had been waiting the entire time for me to come down to re-enact her revenge. Her grip tightened even more as she leaned even closer to me her face right up next to my ear. I could feel her warm breath on my skin because shivers of fear to race down my spine. It caused goosebumps to form on my skin. I didn't know what she was going to do next, but with no supervision and no one to stop her, the possibilities were endless.

"Finnick won't always be around to save your pathetic ass; in the arena you're mine," she hissed.

Soon as she opened her mouth I felt my heart stop my breath caught in my throat. She shoved me roughly into the hard stone, I flinched slightly shutting my eyes tightly. I wouldn't let her know the pain nor did I want to see what she was going to do next. The only thing she would have the satisfaction of hearing was the noise my body made when it slammed into an object.

After a couple seconds I could hear her heels clicking into the distance and the doors open. I let out the air that I had held in my heart finally starting to beat normally. She left. I took a deep breath straightening my clothes out and adjusting my shawl before walking towards the door. I stood outside the door taking a few calming breaths preparing myself for what as on the other side. At this point cameras where the least of my concerns. I let out a final breath putting the happiest grin I could on my face as I pushed the doors open.

Thankfully none of the victors cared all that much to pay attention, most looked up for a couple seconds before returning to their own business. To them since I hadn't showed off any skills I held little to no importance. I wasn't looking forward to being stuck at a table with Rizzle, Tacitus, and Arken but my only other choice was another victor's table and that didn't seem wise either. I nervously made my way towards my table the cold tile floor somewhat soothing on my bare feet.

I kept my smile on my face as I made my way past the other tables they were aligned from 1-12. I could feel Cashmere's eyes on me glaring as I walked past her, I kept my eyes straight ignoring her; I refused to let her get to me. On the other hand I could see Tacitus giving me much the same look as Cashmere, the two of them made the perfect pair. They both thought I was worthless weak and pathetic. I didn't think much different but I wouldn't let them know.

Walking past the second table, I felt and arm slink around mine. My heart stopped slightly, terrified it was going to Cashmere. I felt another hand rest against my arm, I turned my head slightly a relaxing when I saw Mags walking beside me. The older lady gently holding onto my arm. She looked at me smiling sweetly causing a true smile to form in place of the fake on I had on. Mags slightly tilted her head forward towards district 4 table.

She didn't let me reply before I knew it she was gently pulling me towards the empty table. I was thankful Finnick wasn't there. I wasn't sure where he was but I knew being around him brought up things that I wasn't sure how to feel about. If it had been anyone else pulling me to their table I probably would have had some sort of protest. I knew Mags was a gentle soul; you could see it in her eyes. The elderly lady meant no harm to anyone. She was sweet and kind and out of everyone she had to be the most innocent. I felt bad for her being forced back into the games at her age even if she had volunteered in place of Annie.

Reaching the table, I helped Mags into her seat before I sat down beside her. Mags continued to smile at me, patting my shoulder gently for what I could only assume to be a thank you. I gently nodded my head, acknowledging it. Mags motioned to the food before reaching for plates. She put a plate down in front of both of us and I gave a thanking nod, slowly reaching for some food.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed her dipping a napkin into a glass of water. I turned my head wondering what she was doing with it. Taking the damp napkin in her hand, Mags brought it to my face. I froze slightly. The damp cloth brushed against the corner of my mouth, I understood then why she was doing it. I must have had some blood on the corner of my mouth from when Cashmere had tripped me and I hit my face on the floor. Reaching up, I gently placed my hand on hers. She looked at me with curious look, I hadn't had anyone treat me with such tenderness like a mother would. Except for my own who had died when I was eight years old.

"Thank you" I said softly

Mags gave a little nod stroking her thumb against my face softly, causing yet another true smile to form. She retracted her hand going back to plate in front of her, picking up her food as did I. It only took a few moments for me to notice a shadow on the other side of the table. I looked up just in time for my eyes to meet Finnick's as he sat down. I felt my heart seem to skip a beat as I instantly became nervous. Finnick flashed me a crooked grin his head slightly tilted with a joyful and amused look on his face. It wasn't hard to see why everyone was so taken with him; he had it all. Looks, strength, brains, talent, he was charming; he was the full deal he as was lethal. Youngest person to ever win the hunger games.

"Well, hello there, Little Cale," Finnick greeted,

My heart dropped instantly the only one who called me that was my brother. It only took me a few seconds to regain my composure. Finnick was neither here nor there when my brother had called me those names let alone knew that he called me that. I knew it would be best to compose myself before someone noticed.

"Hey Finnick" I greeted happily

Please make sure he didn't notice. That seemed a little too chipper, I thought to myself.

"And what gives us the honor of your presence at our table?" He quizzed. I could hear the flirtatious tone in his voice and I bit the inside of my lip trying not to giggle.

"Well, Mags actually invited me over," I told him simply before leaning in slightly. Finnick copied my actions

"To be honest, I'd rather sit here with you guy's than at mine, It's kind of hard to be around Tacitus. I mean his name does sound like something they'd serve to eat here."

I joked trying to play innocent as I scratched my neck. It's not like the man didn't deserve it. He had been nothing but rude and borderline cruel to me since day one. Finnick gave a light chuckle, sitting back in his chair amused about my comment. I gave out a small giggle, my cheek lightly flushing causing me to look down. I could feel Mag's watching us; a different kind of grin on her face then before.

For the first time in a long time, I found myself having a real conversation with someone. I spent the entire dinner talking with Finnick and Mags. Finnick would translate for me and he'd help teach me simple words and symbols so I could communicate and understand Mag's. I was determined to learn how to talk and understand her and for two hours the three of us didn't speak a word about the capitol or the games. There is no mention about the other victors or strategy, I had completely forgotten about the cameras. It felt like three normal people talking and it was incredible, I loved hearing Finnick talk about his district and about the water. He questioned about my bare feet and thought it was in his words "Adorable" that I refused the wearing of shoes. For the first time in a long time I smiled, I laughed, I enjoyed myself and it was real.

Even after dinner I managed to find myself on the district four floor with Finnick, Mags and even Johanna who we ran into in the elevator on our way back to our rooms. It turns out that underneath her hard outer shell and the look at me wrong and I'll crack your skull open with my axe attitude, she was a really nice girl. Yet, she still had a fire about her that could rival the sun. For those two hours before curfew it seemed like the games didn't exist; none of it did. I think it's because we all knew what was waiting for us in the next few days.

I looked at my reflection in the mirrored metal of the elevator wall. I had to admit for the first time in a long while I looked like myself. Even if it was for a moment in my short lived life I was happy. My eyes had that twinkle to them and my hair looked amazing thanks to Mags and her weaving skills. I knew tomorrow it would all be different. I'd walk into training and everything would go back to how it was. I'd just be pathetic, Pascale the girl who won because of her brother.

I had to prove them wrong; I had to fight. I needed to win for him. Walking across the small hallway I opened the door walking into our room. Arken was sitting in main room watching capitol TV, of course it was all about the games. Closing the door behind me I made my way towards my room.

"You know he's just using you, right?" Arken voice sounded concerned.

It caused me to stop in my track and turn to look at him, he muted the TV turning to face me. I gave him an unsure look what was he going on about. Why did he even care if someone was using me? How would it benefit them when I had no skills?

"What?" I asked confused

"Odair, he's just using you" He spoke slowly as if to make sure I heard.

"What are you going on about, and why would you even care?" I questioned

"I knew your brother Pascale, Penn and I we were good friends. I know he wouldn't want you to get used like this" The way Arken spoke to me reminded much like how my brother used to; with care and concern.

"What are you talking about?" I asked softly

Looking down at my feet, starting to grow weary of what he was going to say. I could hear him get off the couch and I looked up as he walked around it. Arken came to stand in front of me, his fingers gently touching my chin tilting it up to look at him. His almost black eyes bore down into my blue ones.

"You're so innocent, you can't see it… The rest of us can… Finnick is just using you, darling. You're just a pawn to him. What better way to make the capitol love you more, than simply befriending and taking care of and using the capitals most naive victor" Arken's voice was soft but had venom to them as he spoke

I could feel my lip quiver as my heart sank in my chest. It couldn't be true. Finnick wasn't like that. hH would never do that because he was a good man. No matter how hard I tried to fight them Arken's words sunk their way into my brain. The more I thought the more I believed it. I could feel the pressure building up in my eyes as they started to sting. I took a deep breath pulling my head away looking away as I blinked away the tears. It wasn't true, it couldn't be; Arken was just trying to manipulate me I had to fight it. I looked back at him he still had that genuine look of concern. It wa manipulation from Arken I kept telling myself.

"He's not using me Arken. Finnick is my friend." I told him friendly.

"A guy you've never met is instantly nice to you, protects you, knows how small and fragile you are so he charms and flirt his way into your heart to swoon you, to swoon the public to gain sponsor so he can win once more and go home to Annie. Don't ever forget he loves Annie. Mags volunteered so that Finnick wouldn't have to fight his love."

With those words with whatever ounce of strength and happiness I had left was ripped away from me. He was right; I couldn't deny it anymore. Finnick was just using me for his own benefit. Even though I was breaking my hope ripped away from me and I pulled away from Arken. I couldn't let him see me cry I wouldn't let him see even if he knew I was going to. I put my chin up straightened my back and strode towards my bedroom door.

"I know it hurts but I'm just looking out for you kid" He said simply.

"I know," I whispered with my back turned to him.

I didn't look at him but I nodded before closing my door and running right for my bed. I buried my head into my pillow clutching it to my face as I started to sob. This place had a nasty habit of ruining even the slightest shred of happiness I had. I laid there forever in my own pit of despair crying like a toddler in the dark until sleep finally overcame me. It had hurt, it killed and most of all it gave me the courage to know I could do this on my own even if I died trying.

When I had awoken in the morning it was still dark out. I could feel the crusties in the corner of my eyes from crying myself to sleep. Forcing myself out of bed, I walked into the bathroom, turning the light on and going straight to the sink. Turning the tap the water started to pour out. Leaning forward, I cupped my hands under the stream and splashed my face with the cold water. Straightening myself up, I looked in the mirror. Other than the fact my hair was still tightly braided I looked like a complete mess. My skin pale, my eyes red and still slightly puffy. It wouldn't be hard to tell I had a bad night. I could even see a bruise on my arm from where Cashmere had gripped me.

I couldn't let the others see me like this; I wouldn't let them see me like this. I spent a long time last night thinking about everything, from what Arken said. If it was true, if he really was just trying to protect me, or if he was just trying to get under my skin. I thought about the game how I needed to figure out what I was going to do how I was going to get through it. I even thought what my brother would think if he saw me like this…would he be mad…upset, proud? I decided I wasn't going to let them tell me who I was anymore. I didn't want to be the weak little girl, I was going to fight, train I was going to survive. Fuck the hunger games and fuck death. This was my life and I was going to win it.

I took a deep breath before returning back to the main room and getting changed into my training gear. I knew the other victors would still be asleep, but we were allowed to train and be in the dining hall from 5:30am to 8 pm. After changing into my gear, I silently snuck my way out of our room making sure not to wake Arken who had fallen asleep on the couch. Getting into the elevator, I pressed the main floor, when the door finally opened once more I walked straight to the dining hall.

It wasn't shocking that there was nothing extravagant laid out, the Avox's were still scurrying around getting things set up. They seemed to rush more when they saw me enter the room. I didn't stay long I took and apple from one of the bowls of fruit then left. I took large bites out of my apple as I made my way out of the dining room. By the time I had reached the training room I had finished it.

Standing in the doorway I looked around the room. It was somewhat overwhelming I wasn't sure where to start. With my hands on my hips I looked around. There was some many ways to train: tactical, camouflage, survival and strength. There was so many different weapons: swords, knives, daggers, axe, spears, bow and arrow and others.

Somehow I decided knives would be a great place to start. Close combat came in handy when you were corned by an enemy and I needed to learn. I strode my way over to the throwing knives station. Picking up one of the small knives, I faced the targets taking a deep breath I took my aim. I watched Cashmere and Gloss spend all day yesterday throwing the knives. I took a deep breath, steadying myself as I aimed the knife. Flicking my wrist I watched the knife start to fly and stick straight into the floor a foot away from the target. I flinched at my own horrible attempt. After a following 12 more attempts and somehow managing to cut the top of my hand I gave up on the knives. Clearly they weren't a weapon of my choice.

I decided for now I'd lay off the sharp object and focus on survival skills by making fires, climbing and camouflage. It was almost 3 hours before anyone showed up. It was the first just the peace keepers that were helping with training. I took advantage of it, learning, practicing and training with them; I may have been on my back, ass or stomach every two minutes but I didn't care. I was on a mission. I ignored the pain; I refused to stop. An hour later Victors started to show up it wasn't shocking that the careers were first to show up. Although the four of them looked at me like I was some sort of alien.

I didn't care though, I was focused and on a mission to prove to them and myself I wasn't weak. I ignored them completely from there gawking to Cashmere's snide comments. As the other victors slowly started to join they all had the same shocked expression when they first saw me.

"What's gotten into her?" I heard Peeta's voice ask quietly

"She was here before any of us," Enobaria's voice sounded shock

"Why?" I heard Peeta ask

He didn't get an answer Enobaria just walked away with him unimpressed with other districts doings. After finally getting the guard down onto the matt I tapped out. Sweat starting to run down my forehead my heart was pounding and my breath heavy. I wiped the sweat from my forehead turning to face Peeta, he wasn't the only one watching me but he was the only one who was close to the matt.

"Simple: I'm tired of everyone saying I'm weak." I told him flatly

I walked passed Peeta not letting him get the chance to say another word. I walked over to the water fountain leaning over, lapping up water from the stream. Standing straight up I leaned against the wall, the other victors seemed to be disengaged now that I wasn't fighting on the matt. Even Peeta went back to practicing throwing knives. I stood there for a few moments watching them but avoiding Finnick the best I could. When I had finally gained my composure I walked over to the spear throwing section. It was the only one where no one was at the moment.

I picked up one of the spears feeling it, examining it, getting used to the weight. I positioned my feet on the matt. My body straight, positioning the spear I adjusted my hands on it before taking a breath and launching it forward. It was a horrible sight. The spear not only didn't make it to target, it landed a couple feet in front of me going the wrong way. I could hear the Career snickering comments saying how pathetic I was. I ignored them all reaching forward and picking the spear back up trying again. After three more attempts and their snickering I was started to get frustrated. How hard was it to use a bloody spear?

I had the spear in my hand once more, my grip tightened on it my knuckles turning white. My breathing shallow and heavy as I glared at the target. I felt a hand slide against the back of waist and I instantly tensed up as warm breath brushed down the back of my neck. A large hand wrapped around mine I turned my head slightly to see Finnick standing behind me. A small grin greeting me on his face, a whirlwind of emotions flooded me.

"Here Darling let me help you" Finnick said sweetly lifting my arm up with the spear.

"I don't need your help, Odair," I replied coldly.

I wanted to be angry to hate him to shove him away and tell him he's not going to use me as his show thing. Then again I wanted to smile, thank him let him help me with throwing the spear. I didn't know how to feel. I was angry and upset but didn't know it was at him or myself.