Yuki: OK This is a new chapter. Even though I said I would write again after 5 reviews, I'm not allowed on the PC...
Plus my parents disapprove of homosexuality, which makes me have a conflict everytime I write. I also got confirmed yesterday.
But I end up saying, 'Screw it' and start typing anyway.
Anika: To all who reviewed #holds out Cookies of Gratitude; eats one too, since she reviewed#
Disclaimer: I.D.O.Y
"blah/blah" talking/ spiritually, far away, or another language
'blah' thinking
WARNING: YUGI CUSSING AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT
Chapter 2: Body and Heart
Yami woke up minutes after Bakura had left him at the game shop. He looked at his alarm clock... 6:15. He looked around his room cautious if anyone was there, remembering his stripping of innocence was reality, not illusion. Yami soon forgot about it, though and decided that he should tell his aibou and jii-chan should know why he had gotten so incredibly distant from them and their friends. He went to the bathroom in his room, took a shower, got dressed in his leather ensemble, and went downstairs. He sat on the couch across from his jii-chan, who was in the only arm chair they had. His grandfather greeted him in the living room with questioning.
"Yami?"
"Hai, jii-chan?"
"Why are you home so early?" Sugoroku's grandson had never been home so early before this night. Apparently, Yami had a sudden interest in the floor.Yami sighed. 'I guess it's now or never.' He proceeded to tell his grandfather where he went every night, which was always either a bookstore, club, or just to the park, all for the sake of thinking.
"What could possibly be a reason for going for a walk all the way 'till midnight", asked Jii-chan, getting irritated that his grandson, the Pharaoh would do something so stupid and irresponsible. He was interrupted from his train of thought when he looked up at Yami, head hung low. You would not be able to find it true, but Yami was indeed crying. He got up from his chair and sat beside the crying teen, trying to hold back the tears escaping from his blood ruby orbs. "Yami, my boy, what's wrong?"
"Me. I can't even speak about my problem to someone I care about without messing up." Yami wiped away the drops of salty water and looked at his grandpa, who had his arms open. A hug... which Yami was fully grateful for. After hugging and weakening his sobs, Yami tore away from his guardian's embrace. "Jii-chan... I have to tell you some things."
"Tell away, Yami, tell away."
He started to recount about the visions that plagued him every night, what they had revealed to him, and what they foretold. The death of everyone... his friends... even the part about when he heard the shot that he had taken and what he had said only seconds before it.
"At first, I was so worried about you and everyone else that I kept it to myself, but tonight... something else happened." He could feel his tears flow down his cheeks again. " I was walking home, because I was going to tell you and Aibou of this, my curse of foreseeing your death at my hands, but I didn't expect to run into someone along the way." He gazed into old, but wise plum-colored eyes.
"Yami... who was... what happened?" The way Yami had said this, made his stomach turn in anxiety. (A/N:WTH does anxiety mean?) Yami turned away.
"Bakura..." He tried to hold it in but his voice was filled with so much fear, it was scary... ominous... morbid. "He told me he sent the visions, for me to be his future slave. I had never been so terrified in my life, past nor present. But the worst part was yet to come," He lowered his head, not wanting to see the look of disgust his elder would put on his face. "He r-r-raped me, tr-trying to m-make me h-his," stuttered Yami. He kept his head down.
The look was not there, no disgust or hatred, only sympathy and concern. Sugoroku hugged the broken teen gently and lovingly. Yami opened his blood red eyes, not knowing when he had closed them, in surprise. This man, who he had told that he (Yami) may kill with no remorse or regret, still held him close in his heart. Yami wrapped his arms around his guardian, choking on broken and battered sobs, trying to hold them back. Sugoroku noticed this.
"It's okay to cry, Yami." No compliance. "It is not a sign of weakness to cry. It can be a way to feel better after something like what you have been through tonight. I don't see you as weak for telling me this." Yami took these words to thought, and shortly after saying those words, Sugoroku felt his grandson's shoulders shake slightly, feel his shoulder getting wet from salty crystalline tears, and hear sobs of repent, sadness, and angst that no one could ever bear alone.
After about 10 minutes, the sobbing had ceased and all worries were forgotten for a little while. That is... until little Heba (1) came...
Yugi had matured over the months that Yami had ignored him. He had some muscles on his lithe frame, but not overly visible. His eyes of shining amethyst grew somewhat dimmer and they seemed sharper. Right now at about 7:00 pm, he had come home from hanging out with his friends. He had brought up the subject of Yami on accident, which lead to controversy between Anzu's 'Maybe he has some personal matters to deal with,' and Yugi's ' Or maybe he's an inconsiderate jerk.' He walked through the door and climbed the stairs to his bedroom. He started to change into a more sensible outfit for his job at the mall, helping out at Spencer's (3), which meant he could just wear his leather ensemble.
'I'll tell Jii-chan I'm gonna go out for work, I guess.'
Once he was ready, he walked out his door and bumped into Yami (not falling).
"Aibou, what are you going?"
Yugi looked up at him in surprise and slight anger. "Why do you care? You never cared about me once you got your body."
"Aibou, let me explain. Please. (2)"
Yugi looked up at Yami with anger and malice, visible in his eyes. "You're just going to make an excuse for ignoring me... for 3 months." Yami flinched at what words were thrown at him. "You ignore me for 3 months and you expect me to take you back you cold-hearted inconsiderate bastard!" He started down the stairs.
"Onegai (2), Aibou! I couldn't stay close to you. I had already drifted so far apart for a good reason." Yami followed him down.
"Yeah, you have a good reason? I tried to get closer to you, but no! You shoved me aside like trash!" Yami was left looking down at the floor from these accusations. But Yugi wouldn't let up. "You don't fucking care about me do you, you fucking bastard?!" Yami's heart was on the verge of breaking to the point of no repair.
Yami stood in the doorway of the door where the Game Shop and house come together. They had made their way down the stairs arguing. "Please, Aibou-"
"Don't call me aibou! I'm not your aibou anymore!" Yugi started to notice Yami's eyes, usually red and searing, now showing him the hurt, emptiness, and breaking of his soul, but he made no mind. Yami continued, he couldn't let his hikari leave, not yet.
"Onegai, Yugi! I had to drift apart from you to protect everyone! To protect you!!" Yugi couldn't take it anymore, these lies that his former friend, his darkness was telling him.
"You ignored me to protect me?!?! I'm not a fucking kid anymore, Yami!!! I DON'T NEED PROTECTING ANYMORE, ESPECIALLY NOT IF IT COMES FROM YOU!!!"
Yugi ran out of the house, leaving Yami stupified in the doorway. His aibou's words echoed through his mind, making it hard for him to breathe as guilt and hurt rose in his chest.
'You never cared about me once you got your body.'
'You ignore me for 3 months and you expect me to take you back, you cold-hearted inconsiderate bastard!'
'I tried to get closer to you, but no! You don't fucking care about me do you, you fucking bastard?!'
'Don't call me aibou! I'm not your aibou anymore!'
'You ignored me to protect me?!?! I'm not a fucking kid anymore, Yami!!! I DON'T NEED PROTECTING ANYMORE, ESPECIALLY NOT IF IT COMES FROM YOU!!!'
Trying to protect the people, the boy he loved so dearly, had made him ignorant of how they saw him. A loner, an ignorant bastard who didn't deserve to live. He became ignorant of how they could help him, how they could protect themselves, even if it meant his death.
They say ignorance is bliss. In this story, it isn't for long.
'Not anymore... Don't worry Aibou... Soon you won't have to ignore me any longer.'
To Yami, Namonaki Pharaoh, the way he has been broken both body and heart in one single night... death by his own hand will bliss to those around him.
Yami ran back into the house, running past Sugoroku into his room. Tears started to make their way down his face as he ran up the stairs, grandfather chasing behind as fast as he could. He made it to his room and ran into his bathroom, closing the door. He broke down and fell down to his knees sobbing, agony and broken heartedness was surfacing more than he would ever allow, but he didn't care. His aibou didn't love him back and left him to face his fate alone. Slamming against the locked door of his grandson's room, Sugoroku was all but trying to claw his way through the door. Yami made no mind. He was of no more use, and with a suicidal smile, he stood from where he had unconsciously sat on the white bathroom rug he had. He walked over in a leopard's stalk to a certain drawer, opening it and revealing his drug, his freedom, his release of pain. A knife that he had brought back from the Memory World, from his father, Pharaoh Aknumkanon. He traced it with his fingers lightly, feeling the metal that would dance along his skin, but now kill any chances of life that he didn't want. On the knife was engraved, 'Nunquam laxo absque macto.' (4)
'Now no one will be ignored or hurt because of me... Everyone will be happy,' he thought with a small smile as he rose the knife. He sent one last thought through the mind link, still holding up after not being used in a long time. He could feel it was blocked but it didn't matter. He had to hear himself say what was true.
/Aibou,... aishiteru./ And with that, Yami cut through his sleeves to the lightly sun-kissed skin of his forearms covered by them. He went from his elbow to his wrist, going as deep as he could without killing himsef before finishing the deed. He switched arms, mirrored his wound, and then tried to get to his chest. But the image of a chest-plunged knife never came.
Sugoroku had come after going through both of the locked doors with the keys that Yami had forgotten he had. He saw what Yami planned to do and grabbed the knife. Once he did that, Yami crumpled to the floor, sobbing. The blood that matched his eyes was dripping onto the bathroom tiles, but it didn't matter. Without his aibou, it didn't matter. As Sugoroku started to help Yami up, seeing as he had to go to the hospital immediately, he suddenly heard voices whisper across his ears.
'Addo ille famulus ad ille dominus, addo Dominus ille cupio imperium Dominus mereor.' (5)
(1) Heba-Game-Yugi / What Yugi was called in Ch. 1
(2) Onegai - Please
(3) My friends described Spencer's as a sex store. Yugi works there for a reason.
(4) Latin : Never give up without a fight.
(5) Latin : Bring the slave to the master, bring Master the desired power Master deserves.
Yuki: Dun dun dunnnn!!! CLIFFHANGER!
Yami: No, what's gonna happen to me?
Anika: Find out in the next chapter
Yuki: Recenseo et tu pario libum. ( Latin: Review and you get cake.)
As you can see, I like to talk in Latin /\ Happy/\
