Chapter 2
''Ehm, can I ask you something?'' Nitori asked as he stared deeply into Rin's eyes.
''Sure. Anything.'' Rin said, feeling his heart beating a little bit faster than before.
''Who are you?''
Rin froze. What did Nitori just say? Did Nitori really forgot who Rin was? No, that was impossible. The redhead refused to believe such a thing. Nitori was just messing around with Rin, yes. Yes that was the answer.
''Nitori, this isn't funny right now. I was worried as fuck.'' Rin managed to let out a laugh. Yet the positive expression on Rin's face disappeared quickly after he saw the serious one of his kouhai.
''I am really sorry, but… I don't think we've met before. I think you're in the wrong room… My name isn't Nitori. It's…'' Nitori stared at the wall as he blinked his eyes a couple of times. ''My name, that's ehm…''
''Nitori Aiichirou.''
''No, no I don't think that is my name. You're confusing me with someone else –''
''Nitori! I am NOT…'' Rin gave up. His chest began to hurt. It began to sting, as if someone stabbed him right in the heart with a very sharp knife. As if someone kept stabbing it over, and over again.
The sound of a door getting opened appeared, and Rin looked behind him. The doctor stood in the opening of the door; he looked troubled. ''I am sorry to interrupt your… Reunion. But I need to have a talk with Nitori-kun.''
Rin stood up, but almost fell on the floor. He felt weak. He was hurt too badly. ''That's… okay. He doesn't remember me, after all.'' Saying those words out loud, Rin snapped. At first just two – or maybe three – tears fell down onto his cheek. But as soon as that had happened, a whole waterfall of tears appeared.
''I was already afraid of that… Listen up. Nitori got into quite a horrible accident. It might sound something small; he just got pushed down a stairs. However, that accident caused him amnesia since he fell really hard on his head. I want to do a few tests with him for more data and then he is allowed to go back home, if his wounds are healed enough by then.'' The doctor began to explain. ''Minutes ago you mentioned to me that you are his roommate, am I correct?''
''Yes, I am.''
''He needs someone to guide him through his school-life, through normal life. It's usually the parents I would give that task, but they still have not arrived. And since you see him at school and in your room every day, I think you are the only person who can be with him every moment.'' The doctor looked serious. ''Can you do that? Since I can already tell, and I am very sorry, but Nitori-kun will not be able to get his memories back. I hope he remembers his parents, though.''
''I don't think so. He doesn't even remember his own name. He claims that Nitori is someone else,'' Rin sniffed a bit since he finally stopped crying.
''I see… Well, we will talk to his parents and hope they agree with you taking care of him at school. Be easy on him, stay gentle… Otherwise he will get a very bad image of who you are and get afraid of you,'' The doctor softly chuckled.
Rin couldn't laugh, though. All he did was nodding a bit two times. ''I see. I will do my best, then. I'll be going now.'' Rin sighed, and looked at Nitori again. As he expected, his kouhai fell asleep again.
A month later, Nitori was finally able to go back to school. Rin was able to talk with Nitori's parents to convince him that he needed school no matter what. Also in the end, Nitori didn't remember his parents. However, once the doctor told him of amnesia, he gladly accepted that the woman and man standing next to him were his parents. It was a big relief, for the parents that was.
A knock on the door. Rin had just cleaned their room – well, more likely Nitori's part of the room. The redheaded swimmer walked towards the door, and opened it. He there saw Nitori along with his parents.
''Here you are, Aiichirou. This boy will be helping you to get through your weeks.'' His mother smiled, and all Nitori did was nodding once – was he shy for… Rin?!
Rin let the family in the room, and did his best not to jump back as soon as he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was a large hand, and when he looked up he was looking right in the eyes of Nitori's father. Rin had nothing to fear, though. The two grown-ups were one of the nicest people he had ever met in his whole life…
''Thank you so much, Matsuoka-kun. I am very happy to know that someone will be able to take care of him as well, I hope it's not a burden. You're a very good guy and a really good friend.'' Were his words.
Rin was speechless. Oh god, if only his parents knew how many times he yelled at Nitori. How many times he pushed him away for whatever reason. And most probably, how many times the senpai hurt his kouhai…
''Anyway. We have to get going now. Aiichirou, give Matsuoka-kun a chance. This is also very hard for him and he will do his best. Please do so too, Aiichirou.'' Nitori's mother said with a gentle smile as he pressed a soft kiss on her son's forehead.
Once again, Nitori only nodded once. He didn't say anything, he… He didn't even look at Rin. As the parents said goodbye to their son, Rin let out a soft sigh. What was he going to do if Nitori really was scared of him? Was it because of his teeth? Did he do something wrong to Nitori while he was in the hospital? Rin didn't know…
''Goodbye, Matsuoka-kun. And once again, thanks a lot. If there is anything we can do for you, you can give us a call.'' The mother said, as she handed over a small piece of paper with some numbers written down on it.
Rin nodded once, and smiled a little bit – for as far as he could smile, that is. ''I will. And I will also do my best.'' He replied.
The parents said goodbye to their son once more, and then they – finally – left. Rin looked at Nitori, whom was already sitting down on the lower bed; on Rin's bed.
''Eh, your bed is the upper one.'' Rin softly mumbled. Nitori quickly jumped off the older swimmer's bed, having slightly red cheeks out of embarrassment.
''I-I'm sorry.'' He softly said, looking at the floor. ''I really don't know anything, I feel so stupid. Please forgive me, Matsuoka-san.''
Matsuoka….-san…? Rin once again felt his chest hurting a bit. Oh, did he missed the sound of his kouhai annoyingly yelling 'senpai' all the time. Trying his best to hide the fact he got hurt – which succeeded to his own surprise - Rin smiled a little bit.
''Don't worry about it. It's not that you don't know anything. In fact, before your accident you really knew quite a lot. You're a smart guy and… A very good swimmer.'' Rin shyly laughed, as he never complimented Nitori that much ever before.
Nitori's familiar smile appeared on his face, obviously as a sign he felt a whole lot more comfortable around his roommate. ''T-Thank you so much. I was afraid that… I was just a burden to you. After I woke up, you never visited me again.'' Nitori finally opened himself up.
'Fuck…' Rin thought by himself as a lot of guilt fell down on him. The truth was – Rin was just too scared to visit Nitori. He was so scared that Nitori would say that he was 'at the wrong room'. That they didn't know each other. Rin was scared to… get hurt again.
''No that's not it. You're not a burden now, and you've never been before. I admit you were sometimes a bit annoying, but I love you for that.''
…
Fuck. He didn't plan to say that. Not at all! The words just got out of his mouth himself, just like that! Rin stepped back a little bit, starting to sweat nervously slightly. He didn't blink, he couldn't. He wasn't able to say 'just kidding' to cover himself. He couldn't do anything.
''I-Is that so? I didn't… I'm sorry, I didn't know you were… Are you like, really in love with me? I mean… Oh gosh I'm so sorry! I didn't notice, not at the beginning and not until just now!'' Nitori was about to cry, he felt so incredibly guilty of not noticing it. He felt so stupid of not remembering it – if there was something to remember, then.
Rin wanted to say something, but Nitori took away the chance of the redhead to do so. ''Are we like… I don't know, this is so embarrassing to ask, haha…'' He nervously chuckled. ''Are we in a, ehm… R-Relationship?'' Nitori became red on his whole face.
No. They weren't. They weren't a couple at all, they were still just senpai and kouhai, they were still friends. They were still… Roommates. So no, they did not have a relationship with each other. They weren't in love with each other – at least not from both sides.
''Yes, we are.'' Rin replied as he looked away.
'What the fuck?! Shit, that wasn't supposed to happen either. Fuck, fuck, fuck! Fuck this shit, fuck myself! He will just laugh at me, and call me a piece of shit. Yes, he will. Of course he will. I'm such an asshole!' Rin panicked in himself.
''Oh my God. I am so sorry. I hurt you, didn't I? How can I make it up to you? I didn't even gave you a chance before to say that.'' Nitori had some tears sliding down onto his cheeks.
''It's okay. Don't worry.''
''R-Really? You're… Way too kind. Please tell me more, then. I want to know everything. Well, not only about us, that is. But that is at least a good subject to start with.'' Nitori sniffed.
'Matsuoka Rin – asshole of the year. For fuck's sake, what am I doing? I am making use of Nitori's situation, that he believes everything because of his amnesia… God, let me die already.' Rin scolded himself in his mind, but then thought well about it one more time. 'The doctor said he will not regain his memories. So, this isn't that bad, right? He doesn't know I am lying. If I just twist some things and mix them with the truth, it should be fine.'
''Alright, sit down on my bed and I will tell you everything you want to know. And because you want, I will start telling everything about us.'' Rin smiled a little more as he pointed at his own bed. The redheaded swimmer was really confident about it now; Nitori wouldn't even notice how hard Rin was about to lie. He wouldn't get his memories back, after all. This was Rin's chance to make his kouhai his. His and his only! The chance to be more than just friends, more than just kouhai and senpai or roommates.
As Nitori sat down onto Rin's bed carefully, Rin – whom was quite happy – jumped onto the bed himself as well. ''Listen carefully, okay? Before I tell you how we've met, who confessed, how long we are together already, there is something you should know.''
''Alright, what is it?'' Nitori asked, leaning with his head a bit to the right as he glanced curiously at his 'boyfriend'.
''Our relationship is a secret. No one, except for us, knows about it. We don't hold hands in public, because we promised not to tell anyone about it just yet. It's because, well…'' Oh shit, what now? Rin make something up! ''…It's because we don't know how everyone will take it. Not only our family, but also our friends and the other students at school. Mostly our teammates from the swimming team.'' The redhead warned Nitori. Otherwise Rin would get in BIG trouble…
''Oh, I see. I totally understand that, yes.'' Nitori smiled. ''Can I please know everything now? I am really, really curious.'' He giggled, like the old Nitori never left to begin with.
''Alright.'' Rin chuckled softly, not feeling guilty or whatsoever because of lying towards Nitori. Yes, if Nitori's parents only knew… How much Rin was about to make use of Nitori's amnesia. If they only, fucking knew, then they wouldn't have trusted the little guy in the redhead's hands…
[A/N] I'm sorry it's so late! I am very busy, so I also apologize for the bad chapter... I hope I didn't disappoint you. Please review~ ^ 7 ^
Seitei Yuki-chan: sfrd kouhaiiiiiii thank youu~~ ;w;
Forever-yaoi-lover: Thank you SO much for your review! I hope I didn't disappoint you this chapter ^^ Thanks for reading darling~
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