A/N: Updated faster than I expected, I say! For those of you who don't know, I am writing this on the basis of "baby Dark Link," and that's about it. I haven't planned this out at all, so expect updates at random times. Anyways, on to the Disclaimer (this and the last one belong to my good friend Blazeflower, by the way.)

Disclaimer: I have forged Shigeru Miyamoto's will to say that I have inherited Zelda. Only problem? He won't die!

xXx

When Spells Go Awry

Chapter Two

"Impa?" Ganondorf entered the room.

"Yes?" Impa glanced at the Gerudo king over the book she was reading calmly.

"Dark Link's crying. What do I do?"

The Sheikah nursemaid sighed, put the book face down on the little end table, and smiled at Ganondorf condescendingly. "What were you doing right before he started crying?"

"I fed him, and now he won't stop!"

"Burp him." Impa returned to reading.

"What?"

"I said, burp him."

"How?"

"Place him over your shoulder and pat him on the back until he burps, hence the name."

Ganondorf groaned and entered Dark Link's room, where the infant was sitting on the floor, weeping heartily. Ganondorf stooped to pick him up, muttering, "I think I liked you better when you were eighteen. To think that I, Ganondorf, the great King of Evil himself, should be reduced to this!" He tapped Dark Link gently, pacing about the room. "Although…" An evil grin crossed the Gerudo's face. "This could be a perfect opportunity to retrain you…you could be even more powerful than you were…I can wait a couple of years…"

There was a hiccupping sound from Ganondorf's shoulder, and Dark Link quieted. Ganondorf exhaled in relief, taking the shadow from his shoulder, but let out an "argh!" when he noticed a white liquid dribbling down Dark Link's chin, finding a similar material decorating his armor. "Impa!"

o0o

"Hi, you!" Saria gushed, taking Dark Link from a very irritated Ganondorf. Goddesses, she loved this kid (though technically, he was probably older than she.) She didn't know why, exactly; something about him made her feel instantly attached. It was all very odd, but she didn't think about it much.

Dark Link smiled toothlessly at her in response. Ooh, he was adorable! Whatever he was or would become, right now he didn't give off any aura that would cause her to become suspicious.

This thought, she pulled him onto her lap and began the process of trying to teach him her name. "Saria."

"Sar…a?"

"Sar-ee-ah."

"Sawia." This little guy was bright; she'd never seen a child his "age" catch on so quickly.

"Close enough."

In the back of her mind she could register a small conversation taking place in the other room.

"That kid…he better not do it again." Ganondorf.

"For Nayru's sake, he's only a child!" Impa's voice rang out, more alarmed than usual.

"I am a Gerudo king, and he has the audacity to vomit on my armor?"

"The stain will come out."

"It is not that I am worried about. It is his rebellious nature! Now that he is a child with a mind like a sponge, he will obviously learn certain habits from you Sages and that Din-forsaken Hero!" Ganondorf's voice was rising. "It will not be tolerated!"

Saria clutched Dark Link closer to her chest.

xXx

She had never liked Dark Link. Never.

And now she, Princess Ruto, was babysitting him. And he was crying. Again. She'd just got him asleep, or so she thought; the Goddesses seemed to be feeling more sadistic than usual.

"Whaddaya want, kid?" Ruto asked irritably. She was definitely growing more impatient; normally she wouldn't be so informal with her language.

"Daaaaa!" Oh, now he spoke up. To the Sacred Realm with him.

"Fine," she sighed, scooping him up and tossing him over her shoulder, much to Dark Link's displeasure; it induced a fresh sit of wails.

As she walked down the wide corridor, she realized that, in fact, she had no idea what Dark Link meant by "Da." Pondering it briefly, she decided, Oh, Ganondorf, obviously! Who else?

She turned in the direction of Ganondorf's temporary quarters.

xXx

Oh Farore, no, Ganondorf thought, seeing Ruto approach him, a sobbing Dark Link in her arms.

"He wants you," Ruto said shortly.

"I don't want him."

"Deal with it," Ruto hissed; she must have been feeling confident, what, with Link so near.

Ganondorf mumbled something about, "reversal of the spell," and relieved (quite literally) Ruto of the child. The Zora princess left with no hesitation in her step at all.

"Dark Link, you twit," Ganondorf muttered. "What am I going to do with you?"

o0o

A/N: There's your SariDark fix, people! No, not really. In later chapters it may be, but for now, no. *Wags finger* Kids, you just can't have a relationship with a baby! But enough about that. Let us move on to less important matters: chapter length. So the chapters are shorter than I normally write. Live with the pain. Like I said, any inspiration I find is new inspiration, so I'll have a little something for each chapter, but none will be very long (unless I get a HUGE inspiration surge.) Anyways…

My reviewers! Moon White Rose, Rawkhawk2.0, zeldagamer96, Forest Princess, and Blazeflower. Ya'll get cookies. And no, they don't have Termina Fever microbes in them! What gave you that impression? …Look, that was not my fault, okay? It was Link, I swear it.

Now then, the threat. *Clears throat* Review, or I will gag you, lock you in a small closet, and force you to read My Immortal (The infamous Harry Potter fanfiction) sixteen times. Thank you for your cooperation.