A nice short one for you.
Oedipus Complex.
America was very much enjoying his holiday – his buddy Italy had invited him to his place for a couple of weeks, and man, was it nice! It was, like, the BEST pizza he had ever eaten, and he'd eaten some gooood pizza. And the ice cream, good god the ice cream! Although he didn't really get the fuss about all old buildings and all the farms everywhere. They didn't even grow corn, just a whole bunch of fruit. It was weird. Japan seemed pretty interested in all the old stuff, though... or was he? It was kinda hard to tell...
On this particular night, Italy had a rendezvous with Germany (if you know what I mean, wink wink, nudge nudge), leaving America and Japan to fend for themselves for the evening. Both a little overwhelmed by the open air market (and who wants to go to the supermarket when you're on holiday, really?), they decided to go to a restaurant near Italys house, one that he personally recommended, so it had to be good.
The patrons were incredibly friendly, ushering them in with smiles and delicious smells. They immediately offered them a free glass of house wine, which Japan didn't hesitate to take away from the underage America (230 years is infantile to a country, after all). As the host showed them to a free table at the back, they noticed a familiar grating whine coming from the bar.
"Hey, Romano!" America called "How you doing, buddy?"
Japan grimaced – how... how was he that blind? Romano was bent over the bar, half empty bottle of tequila in one hand and shot glass in the other, complaining loudly to the poor bar man.
"Hey, are you even listening to me?" Romano demanded "I want more tequila! Oi!"
Realising he hadn't been heard, America bundled over to him and slapped him playfully on the back.
"Dude!" he called louder "You going deaf or what man?"
Romano yelped, half in shock and half in pain, before spinning around furiously.
"What the hell, you bastard?!" he shrieked "Who the hell runs up to people in restaurants and smacks them?! Are you out of your mind?!"
America just laughed as Romano continued to berate him. Mortification growing, Japan followed the waitress to their table.
"And so that bastard Spain blew me off to hang out with his idiot friends!" Romano finished as he shovelled spaghetti into his mouth "I had a whole evening planned and that bastard didn't even care!"
"Dude, that's totally harsh." America agreed, also having a face full of ricotta "I know just how you feel – last time I took Britain out for dinner, he totally yelled at me! He was so unappreciative!"
"Exactly!" Romano concurred.
"Please... swallow your food first." Japan begged "And Britain was mad because you offered to take him out to dinner and then bought him McDonalds."
"McDonalds is perfectly good dinner!" America argued.
"Exactly, you dress wearing gold-fish tender!" Romano agreed "It's not the food that counts, it's the thought! Don't you know anything?! America!" he turned back to the blonde "Let me tell you about this one thing that happened!"
Japan decided not to drink. With Romano drunk off his ass and America... well, America, he thought it was best he was in full control of his faculties. He ate his bolognese and sipped at his water as the two of them rambled on.
"And so I tried to kiss him, but the idiot thought I wanted to play, like I was still a kid, and lifted me up and spun me around like I was a plane or something!" Romano declared "Can you imagine that?!"
"I can!" America swore "When I tried to kiss England, he thought I was just hungry and made me dinner! When I tried again later during the movie, he thought I was just scared and pat me on the head. Man, it was really embarrassing, you know?"
"I know!" Romano yelled "You understand me!"
"I completely do!" America swore "We have the same problem!"
Japan sighed. Romano, at least, had the excuse of being drunk. America was... he was such an innocent young nation...
"America, you gotta help me!" Romano begged "You and Spain get on great! Tell me your angle!"
"Man, I don't have an angle!" America swore "I'd totally tell you, I swear! I'm too busy trying to get Britain to take me seriously." he sighed "Why won't he see me as an adult?"
"America!" Romano cried as he grabbed his hand "You're my true brother!"
Japan sighed again, finished his pasta and flagged down the waitress to order his dessert
"Hey, Japan!" China called "I heard you took a holiday in Italy! Was it fun?"
Japan thought carefully about his answer. He looked at China as he patiently waited.
"I have a better appreciation for our relationship." was his answer.
"Eh?"
China just looked confused. Behind him, Romano yelled at Spain, who simply laughed like always, while Americas own pleas for attention were met with England suggesting he should take a nap. Oh yes, Japan appreciated his brother quite a lot.
To those who don't know what an 'Oedipus complex' is... it's a term in Freudian Psychology. Long story short, the name 'Oedipus' stems from the Greek tragic hero who (accidentally) murdered his father (but he tried to kill him as a baby, so it was cool) and (accidentally) married his mother. Freud used it to refer to little boys who liked their mothers more than their fathers (oversimplification, but this if fanfiction, not a psychology text book). That's what I see when I read USUK fanfics... America with a serious Oedipus complex.
If you're ever curious about Freud or Freudian psychology, you should totally look him up. He may be one of the fathers of modern psychology, but I think they bloke was nuts.
