Authors Note:
Hi, I didn't proofread this and I am sorry for that but hey, I wrote a long chapter and I hope you all like it! I really love getting reviews and they motivate me to write more and more often so if you like this, please please please please review it! Anyways, enjoy! Thanks for reading!
The girl hoists herself up onto the ledge, smiling sinisterly as she looks down at her blood stained fingers. She bites her lip, lowering her arms down and looking down at the city below her. The wind blows her hair in every direction, blurring her vision momentarily as she lifts herself higher. Her foot crushes the cement, sending her on top of the roof with an echoed click. She carefully makes it across the entire surface, crouching down to slip into a window. With nimble feet, Sara's down in the small apartment. She grins to herself, stumbling to the door at the end of the hallway. She twists the knob with sharp intent. As the door opens, she's met with Tegan Quin's Swiss Army Knife, ready to cause damage. Sara giggles, licking her lips and tasting the sweet tang of blood.
"Sara Murphy?" asks Tegan's quivering voice.
Sara takes another step towards Tegan, who keeps the blade held high. Sara cups Tegan's face, smearing the warm blood over her smooth cheeks. Sara can feel Tegan's heart racing against hers and she likes it. In a single beat, Sara's lips crash into Tegan's. Music plays loud, surrounding them and wrapping its smooth melody around their petite waists. Tegan drops the knife, her arms following suit and soon, retracting up to hold Sara's hips. Sara falls back onto Tegan's unmade bed and pulls Tegan right along with her. The kiss becomes instantly heated and Tegan's hands are all over the younger girl's body. Tegan squeezes at Sara's breasts, eliciting a gasp from the girls mouth. She feels Tegan smile against her lips and she whispers something so powerful, it's hard for Sara to comprehend it.
"I've been waiting my whole life for this."
Sara smiles at the phrase and leans in to kiss Tegan again. Except this kiss, isn't as powerful and it doesn't feel right. Sara opens her eyes and sees her pastel yellow pillow staring back at her. She sighed, laying back and listening to the annoying squeal of her alarm clock. She lifts her head for a split second to check the time. Once she realizes it's too late to shower, she hoists her body up. In quick attempts to make herself look at least half decent, she rushes to the bathroom and washes her face. While in a trance-like state, Sara mechanically prepares for the day: washing her face, combing her hair into a high ponytail and picking out her outfit. The attire of the day consists of jeans and a Southland High Cheer t-shirt. She yawns, collectively as she looks into the reflection staring back at her. Is this like any other day? She lets herself think so. Her mind is somewhere else today, perhaps on her boyfriend or perhaps on the Spring Formal. If Sara were to be completely honest with herself, she was thinking about her dream. She was thinking about Tegan Quin. She often dreamt of the stout girl, in different situations. Each one ended the same way; with Tegan's tongue down her throat. It never went further than kissing and fondling, much to Sara's dismay. Many times, she'd see Tegan in the hallways and fantasize about holding her hand or kissing her fiercely against the lockers. Sara would never actually let any of these ideas happen. God no! She had a reputation to think about and people to impress. She couldn't ever admit to being attracted to another girl; not to anyone, not even herself. However, her subconscious spoke otherwise.
"Sara Kiersten Murphy! You'll be late if you don't hurry up!" she hears her mother call out, just as she's finished brushing mascara on her already elongated eyelashes. '
She grabs her backpack from the floor and swings it over her shoulder as she exits her room. She immediately drops the backpack and heads into the room again to make her bed. She smiles to herself, satisfied as she re-exits her bedroom. When she walks into her mother's impeccable kitchen, she's offered an apple like every single morning. She takes it, smiling to her mother as the pair walk to the car.
"Don't forget, I've got cheer practice after school," Sara reminds her mother for the umpteenth time since the previous morning.
She chuckles and nods, used to her daughters need of control. Sara glances up at her mother, taking a bite out of her apple. Her mother keeps her eyes on the road as she drives the three and a half minutes it takes from their house to Southlands wide campus. As Sara's mother pulls into the parking lot, she sees a girl with a mullet exiting the CityFare bus and walking across the street. The girls backpack has all kinds of patches sewn on, paired with safety pins that hold the material together and she holds a pack of Marlboro Reds in her hand. Sara's mother looks at the girl with confusion while Sara looks at her with attentiveness.
"Now, that girl is something…" Sara's mother trails off. Her daughter simply nods as she climbs out of her mother's van and grabs her bright pink backpack. She's suddenly embarrassed as she spots Tegan sitting at the curb with a cigarette pressed between her lips. Usually, Sara's disgusted at the thought of those cancer sticks, but something about it being in Tegan's mouth composes her want to taste it. She glances down at her mother as she tells her goodbye and shuts the door. She licks her lips, glancing from Tegan to her mother's van as if she needs to pick between them. It takes her what feels like a century to move. She keeps glancing back at Tegan as she walks up to the doors. She's immediately brought back to herself once she's hit with the smell of her school. It's a variety of scents, mostly consisted of cleanliness. She was proud of that. Everything about the school she was proud about. She honestly felt responsible for how great it was. Her father's company funded most of the programs and events. She of course, had to pitch to him why the sponsorship was important and how it could boost his company's sales. Her father was a huge on business and making Sara work for what she wanted.
Sara walks into her first class of the day: US History. She was the only sophomore in the class but everyone enjoyed Sara's company. She had taken High School by storm. Her freshman year was spent trying to please everyone. She'd joined the Student Council and tried out for almost every sport she could. She recalled seeing Tegan and being confused of her gender, until the two had gym together. Then, Sara knew she was a girl but hadn't ever seen a girl who looked so much like a boy. Her family was gender oppressive and her father, homophobic. Her mother had a pretty simple idea on homosexuality: "Whatever makes them happy". However, Sara knew her mother would be disappointed if any of her kids were gay.
As Sara takes a seat, she mentally goes over her schedule, as she did every day. First period: US History. Second period: Geometry. Third period: English. Fourth Period: Office Aide. Lunch. Fifth Period: Chemistry. Sixth Period: PE. And lastly, seventh period: Art. Art was Sara's favorite class but every day, she looked forward sixth period. PE was the class she had with Tegan, the second year in the row. She often felt bad for Tegan when the class needed partners because she didn't have a friend in the class. Or friends at all for all that Sara knew. She always saw Tegan, alone walking down to the gas station with a cigarette in hand when she and her friends drove down to Taco Bell. Anyways, Sara felt bad when mean comments were made about her sexuality in the class. Though, Sara almost always snuck a look at Tegan. She'd look up and down her slender body, stopping at her larger thighs for a second but only to continue to her skinny ankles and bony feet. Tegan's body confused Sara in that way. Her breasts were large, her stomach flat, her hips and thighs wide and then her skinny calves and feet. Another thing was that with clothes on, Tegan appeared to have small breasts, almost nonexistent. Sara's body was petite, though toned from cheer, soccer and softball. Her breasts were a subtle 32B but she guessed Tegan was well into a C or even a D.
"Uh, Sara?" Stephanie Cortez's voice interrupts Sara's thoughts.
Sara looks up with a big smile, trying to act like she wasn't just thinking about Tegan Quin's body. "Hey! Hi!"
Stephanie takes her seat as the bell rings and asks Sara, "So, has he asked you?"
"Has who asked me what?" Sara asks, tightening her ponytail and looking at Stephanie quizzically.
"Nick. Did Nick ask you to Spring Formal?"
Nick is Sara's boyfriend. He's tall, smart and attractive. He doesn't play sports and he secretly likes poetry. Like Sara, everybody likes him. He's a senior and when he kisses Sara, he gets his sticky saliva all over her cheeks. When Sara sucks his dick, she hates it and when he returns the favor, she imagines Tegan is the one with her face between Sara's thighs. The two haven't gotten farther than oral sex, but Nick has plans before he graduates. He makes a horrible grunting noise when Sara pleasures him and often, Sara imagines Nick on the toilet making those same noises. It disgusts her entirely.
"No," Sara says, he never asks me.
Stephanie frowns with pretend sympathy, "I'm sure he'll ask soon."
"He doesn't need to. It's assumed that we're going together."
"Still," Stephanie says, "it's his job as your boyfriend to ask you."
Sara shrugs, she doesn't really like Nick but he's gotten her in a good place with the seniors at Southland and she doesn't want to give that up. This is how Sara's mind operates, how can she improve herself? How can she make people like her?
The rest of US History goes smoothly with Sara's mind only straying to her dream six times instead of the usual eighteen. Her classes all repeat almost the exact same. A friend asks her about the dance and Sara responds politely. She fakes being excited to go with Nick and even lies, saying he had asked her with a rose. It was cheesy, but it needed to be done. She couldn't have people being suspicious of her relationship when she was constantly thinking about a particular girl. She tried to make everyone thinking she was normal and she succeeded. Everybody had liked her and she got along with every kind of clique. So she thought.
Cliques- the word provoked a lot of confusion and thoughts about Tegan. Tegan was a total loner and why did Sara feel bad for her? Maybe Tegan enjoyed the solitude. Sara, however, enjoyed other company because she didn't have to think so much. She could just talk about the vapid things her so-called friends always talked about: the most recent parties (which Sara had attended for barely an hour), their classes and their hobbies. Sara almost always talked about sports or homework. Her friends probably thought there was no depth to her and she was fine with that because the depth of her was her obsession with Tegan Quin and it was pathetic and weird. Surely, Tegan had to have girls left and right. That's how lesbians work, right? They had a lot of sex, right? That's all Sara had ever heard about them: is that they were really sexual. Of course, girls often accused Tegan of looking at them in the locker room. Tegan generally came back with snide and witty remarks.
Sara looked at the clock, feeling upset with herself that she wasn't focused on her classes today. She was too focused on her dream from the night before. It was insane. She was covered in blood and she had like, superhuman powers. She was also bold. Sara liked that she had made the move on Tegan in her dream. Usually, it was Tegan who made the moves. For example, Sara had a dream not long ago where Tegan had kidnapped her and proceeded to confess her ultimate love for Sara. Then they made out and it was blissful to Sara. When she woke up, she'd made a mess of her panties. That was the first time she'd offered to do the laundry, afraid her mom would notice.
The bell rang loudly, every single student rising and grabbing their backpacks. Sara stayed in her seat for as long as she could because she knew that her next class always went by fast. It wasn't a class really. She was an office aide. She answered phones, helped sign kids out and walked to classes to hand out passes or give important messages. Sometimes, it would drag on if she didn't have anything to do. Sara grabbed her bag and rose from her seat. She walked slowly to the office, slipping behind the desk and tucking her backpack away. She sat down, tapping along the desk almost impatiently. The bell rang and Sara quickly pulled out her homework, having nothing else to do. She was working through a Pythagorean Theorem problem when she heard someone clear their throat. She looked up and dropped her pencil at the sight of Tegan. Again, in Sara's head, music played as the two locked eyes. Sara remembers their previous encounter and blushes a deep crimson.
"Uh, h-hi," Sara stutters as she looks at Tegan's shirt which displayed silhouettes of naked girls in neon colors. Sara could clearly see the breasts of the girls on Tegan's shirt. This totally violated the dress code. Already, Tegan violated the no piercings rule the school had in place. She had her lip pierced, directly in the center but instead of its normal placement, the piercing was lower than usual. Sara simply had her ears pierced, twice on both ears. It was accepted by the school. Tegan played with said piercing, tugging on it with her teeth. It made Sara nervous. She wondered what kissing Tegan would feel like with the stud on her lips. Would it feel good? Sara looked down at her pink, polished nails and then back up at Tegan.
Tegan cleared her throat again, "I'm an office aide, I guess?"
Sara could feel her face begin to fever. Tegan Quin would be an office aide with Sara. They would have to do things together, every day. Sara had to force herself to smile, despite feeling foolish and embarrassed. "Oh, well, come on in."
Tegan passed through the door and into the office, still gripping tightly to her backpack. She sat down next to Sara. There was an awkward silence that filled the room. They were alone- completely alone together and little Sara know, but Tegan wanted to touch her and well, Sara wanted to touch Tegan. Thankfully, someone walked up to the desk and Sara sprung up to help them.
"Hi, what did you need?" Sara asked cheerfully.
She sounded too excited, she thought. When compared to Tegan's neutral tone and careless demeanor. The person was Charlie Karen's mother and she was picking him up for a doctor's appointment. Sara glanced back at Tegan, figuring she needed to show Tegan what to do. "Come here," she said.
Tegan awkwardly stood up, heaving a sigh and walking to the desk. Sara dialed Mr. Lineager's phone and handed it to Tegan.
"Tell Mr. Lineager that Charlie Karen's mother is here to pick him up," Sara instructs and to her surprise, Tegan complies. Sara smiles, biting her lip as Tegan hangs up. That smooth voice makes Sara's fingers tingle and her stomach to flip. She wants to hear the voice at night when she's lying in bed, close to sleep. She wants to hear that voice tell her good morning. Most of all, Sara desires to hear that voice say I love you, Sara Kiersten Murphy, with all my heart.
Sara looks back to Charlie Karen's mother and smiles. "I'll write up a street pass," she says as she turns and grabs the stack of passes and carries them back to the desk. She sets them down and starts to write down all the information, then hands it to Charlie's mother. "Just have his doctor sign this and have him bring it into the office tomorrow," Sara tells her with a smile.
After Charlie and his mom walk off, Sara turns and catches Tegan looking at the stack of passes with a huge grin plastered on her face. Sara grabs the passes and tucks them away. "Don't even think about it," she says to Tegan, sternly.
Tegan laughs and sits up on the desk, smiling. The sound of Tegan's laughter sends shivers down Sara's spine and her heart beats a second or two faster. Tegan's eyes are the prettiest toffee brown, Sara decides she wants to stare into them for as long as she can, maybe her whole life. Sara sits back in her seat and looks up at Tegan for an explanation.
"Oh come on, you're telling me you've never thought about it?" she challenges Sara with an eyebrow raised. Sara simply shakes her head.
"Never," Sara says, "I'm loyal to this school."
Tegan nods slowly, pursing her lips as she thinks. Sara wants to kiss her lips, she imagines their soft and taste slightly of nicotine and slightly of something sugary. The times she'd seen Tegan eat, it was always something unhealthy- like a donut, a candy bar or a cookie. Sara was on top of what she ate, though she was allowed a daily lunch of Taco Bell or McDonalds. It was usually small anyways and Sara always worked off the calories. Tegan, luckily, could eat whatever the hell she pleased without gaining a pound. Maybe Sara was just a control freak.
"You're like the president of the school or some shit, right?" Tegan asked and Sara's heart skipped a beat.
"Vice President of Student Council," she corrected Tegan, who simply nodded.
Tegan looked at Sara, "You're like never in trouble, huh?"
Sara shook her head, giving Tegan what she hoped was a naive look. She had heard from her father that gay people often preyed on innocent people. She wanted Tegan to prey on her. She wanted to be taken advantage of and by Tegan. She wanted to get really drunk and she wanted Tegan to take her somewhere and have sex with her. She heard that happened a lot.
Tegan nodded slowly, "I can't remember a time when I wasn't in trouble."
"Doesn't that get annoying?" Sara asks.
"Doesn't being so good get boring?" Tegan contradicts.
Sara smiles and shrugs, "I mean, I guess, but I've got things to do, places to go, people to see. I can't mess that up by ditching class."
"You're headed for university, eh?"
Sara sheepishly nods, "Columbia or Brown."
"Look at you, Mrs. College-bound," Tegan teases, worsening Sara's flushed cheeks.
Fortunately, Sara's saved by Ms. Vanger walking up and handing them a handful of papers. They're passes to distribute to classes. Sara looks at Tegan, "Come on."
The pair walks through the empty halls, holding the stack of passes. Occasionally, they awkwardly disrupt classes to hand out the notes. Eventually, they run out of passes and find themselves in an empty bathroom in the freshmen hallway. They're standing at the sinks, washing their hands and looking at themselves in the mirror. Sara feels a stride of confidence and turns to Tegan, looking at her face. She looks long and hard, memorizing every detail. Tegan looks back at Sara, awkwardly chewing on her bottom lip. Sara looks down at Tegan's lips for a second, then up at Tegan's eyes. Her hands shook nervously.
"You're hands are shaking so that means…" Tegan starts, but trails off.
Sara nods, pressing her body against Tegan's in a swift movement. This all feels right and suddenly, they're kissing. Tegan's hands hold Sara's face in place as she swipes her tongue across Sara's wet bottom lip. Sara parts her lips, allowing Tegan's tongue to slip inside and rub against Sara's. Tegan's an expert kisser and it feels so much better than Nick. This all feels so much better than Nick. Tegan's breasts pressed against Sara's feels good and Tegan's soft hands feel nice where they are. Sara wraps her arms around Tegan and pulls her an inch closer. Tegan reaches up and pulls the hair-tie from Sara's hair, the soft brown locks shaping around her face. Tegan laces her fingers into the greasy mess of hair that Sara's got. Sara giggles when Tegan presses her against the wall and they look at each other for a second before Tegan's pushing Sara's chin up slightly so she can attach her lips to the soft skin there. Tegan is careful not to leave marks and this whole action is causing a mess in Sara's underwear. She's never felt like this. She's never felt… wet. She gasps, letting Tegan continue her raid until the ten minute PE rings. They briskly pull away and Sara takes the ponytail from Tegan's wrist and moves her hair up into a tight pony tail. She smiles shyly and Tegan grabs her waist.
"Hey," Sara whispers.
"Hi," Tegan replies, smiling big.
Sara feels awful, though she enjoyed that encounter a lot.
"I… we… we have to keep this a secret," Sara says, wrapping her arms around Tegan's neck. Tegan stays silent, looking up at Sara expectantly. "If my parents… or anyone found out… I'd… I would…"
Tegan kisses Sara, biting her bottom lip and tugging on it. Sara moans softly as Tegan says, "Sh, honey, I get it."
Then, the two of them walk back to the office silently. They secretly exchange phone numbers and Tegan rubs Sara's back carefully before taking her backpack and leaving before the bell rings. Sara smiles widely, watching Tegan walk away. It tasted exactly how she wanted, like how she expected except maybe more cigarettes. When the bell rings, Sara's immediately met with her boyfriend and when he goes to kiss her, she turns away and he ends up kissing her cheek. Sara looks at him apologetically,
"I didn't brush my teeth this morning," she lies.
Nick believes her, they find their friends and they climb in their cars. Sara sees Tegan walking down the street. She gets a warm feeling in the pit of her stomach and she knows it was the right thing to do.
