Life as an Asura is difficult.
Not that it's a harsh life or anything. I have plenty of food and everything I could ever need in Rata Sum. I have to admit if I wasn't so small I would probably be going overboard with my eating. Years on the road, traipsing through deserts and shadowy dimensions, along with living in the ruins of Ascalon for several years left me with a particular love of food.
No, food was not the problem. The main issue is just...
I'm so fucking SMALL!
Never in my past life did I get to see a little Progeny, so I had no idea the diminutive asura were EVEN BLOODY SMALLER as children than adults!
And to make matters even worse, I am the smallest in my class.
Yes. I know. It is horrid.
In my past life I wasn't a mountain of muscle like Koss, but I was still a frickin respectable height! I don't think I would reach of to me knee! MY KNEE!
MY GLICHING KNEE!
Speaking of glitches. School is fun. Ascalon didn't exactly have schools for most things beyond fighting. The Guild Wars and Charr saw that pretty much everything was focused on war, so I don't have much to compare it too.
But I have to humbly admit, I'm pretty smart.
A genius even.
But enough of that. Did you know, the entire world is ending?
I know. Big surprise for me too. Especially considering I ALREADY SAVED THE THING SEVEN TIMES!?
Am I cursed? My entire life was dedicated to stopping annoyingly powerful forces from whipping out everything, and as soon as I... die? Vanish? Things just get worse?
WORSE!?
HOW COULD IT BE WORSE THAN A COALITION OF EVIL GODS HELLBENT ON ANNIHILATING ALL LIFE ON TYRIA YOU ASK!?
Dragons!
And not some wimpy dragons like Kuunavang or Glint. Honest to Grenth, big enough to wipe out a city, wings can start hurricanes, dragons.
Honestly, I'm a little surprised the world isn't over already. It's hard to believe there somehow managed to be almost a thousand years of relatively "Apocalypse free" time between the exodus of the gods and the gods coming back to kill us all.
Those 900 years sound pretty damn pleasant. Why couldn't I have been born in one of those?
Maybe it was only 90 years. I never did much studying on History. Most of my knowledge comes from Mhenlo. He never could shut up with his overly detailed explanations.
What a nerd!
Come to think of it he might have been the only one of us to have gone to any kind of school when we killed the lich.
Which does not lend itself well to the idea of required schooling.
Although I personally am enjoying it. I never would have expected school to include making G.O.L.E.M. arrays. Shame no one uses the spells out version of the name anymore though. I really enjoyed using the full name in conversation to annoy people.
Mostly Vekk.
But that's not important.
What is important is that I don't know what school to apply too.
I have three inventions (my little babies) that I have made to apply to college. But I'm not sure which one I should use. Or which college to apply to at all. I am a very motivated student. I just want to LEARN!
LEARN EVERYTHING!
WHY DO THEY MAKE US CHOOSE WHICH THINGS TO LEARN!?
Those... stupid... ignoramuses!
I'm fairly certain that is a word.
It might not be.
BUT!
My inventions are a Val-A golem. It's pretty much just a small golem I designed and build to carry my things. The sucker was too small for me to ride around on though so I still have to walk around.
I know. It sucks.
EVER WALK A MILE WITH A GATE THAT'S ONLY A FOOT LONG!?
What was I talking about?
My SECOND invention is a doohickey that lets me see alternate universes. It's more a proof of concept than anything else because it would require "thaumanova reactor" levels of power to work properly.
Unfortunately, the reactor exploded quite spectacularly.
It was not my fault. I don't know what you are talking about.
AND MY FINAL INVENTION!
Is... a... weather ball?
Yeah that sounds about right. It probably changed the weather or something. I built it in an afternoon when it was raining and I didn't want to look for a umbrella.
Can you believe no one has built a better version of a telescoping umbrella?
It's a travesty!
I should invent a magic umbrella! You could probably just use a spell array and flow some air magic in it to displace the air without actually spending too much energy and the extranio-
Shush brain. I am busy.
I need to get into a college soon. Those annoying goons from... er... what are they called?
Equestrians? No. Asura don't care about centaurs.
INQUEST!
Yeah, those red clad morons. They keep coming around when I am busy INVENTING MY BABIES and trying to get me to join their stupid club. As if someone of my immense GENIUS would wallow in mediocrity with those fools. They spend all their time being sneaky instead of inventing and piss off everyone they come across. Don't they realize unnecessary confrontations only make things more difficult in the long run?
Although dissecting those plant golems was interesting. They almost look human, even on the inside.
I almost felt sorry for them until one of them mentioned Ventari. I hate that stupid centaur. He was ABSOLUTLLEY NO FRAKKING HELP WHATSOEVER!
If Ventari's Refuge is still around I plan on setting the damned thing on fire the first chance I get.
