It's been about five years since I wrote this fic. In that time, I've had various people say that they don't get it, or that they're not sure who won. I thought at first that there was no point explaining, because much of the joy in a complex story (for me, anyway) is ferreting out the meaning for oneself. But part of the reason I write fanfic is to communicate ideas about the characters, and if people don't get the meaning of the fanfic, then it's lost on them. I've been replaying Suikoden III lately, and although it might be an author's little self-indulgence, I still want to explain my ideas.

Who won the argument? --Caesar, without a doubt. He's caught Apple in a contradiction. Earlier on, she's told him that if someone was once so close to you as to be family, then that still means something and it's not a matter you can just discard and ignore. However, she is insistent that she doesn't have family, although she has an ex-husband (presumed here to be Sheena) that she seems to be writing out of her life completely. Caesar has pointed out the contradiction-- that she's writing off her ex-husband while simultaneously insisting that no one can write off their family. He insinuates that if she believes as she does, she'll have to go to Gregminster to see her ex-husband, from which derives the punning title of the fic. When she realises the double-standard she's setting, she's embarrassed and defensive, but all she can do is shout ineffectively because she's already lost.

To me, this is notable because it shows that through the years between Suikoden II and Suikoden III, Apple has grown beyond her lack of confidence into a person who is willing to stand her ground in an argument. She's willing to give social advice, to assert herself as Caesar's elder, and to pass judgment on her ex-husband as being someone she doesn't want in her life. She's confident enough that when she loses an argument, she's surprised and a bit put out, rather than crushed. Yet she does know when she's lost; she's not smugly deluding herself that Caesar doesn't understand, but rather accepting that, frustrating though it may be, he's got a point.

Caesar, by contrast, is the same as we've always seen him act in the game: casual and cool. Caesar-from-the-game and Caesar-from-the-manga seem like two entirely different people to me, and I can't imagine manga!Caesar taunting Apple, even with good will-- he's too earnest for that. But game!Caesar seems to relate in just that way: he's laid-back and teases her about being a bookworm. He hasn't had much opportunity to change since then, so it's Apple who is the most striking in this fic.

Anyway, I hope that this explanation clears things up a bit. I've received various comments on this fic over the years, and I get excited over every one. I'm just glad that people are enjoying it and thinking more about the characters in new ways. These characters are always important to me; even though it's been a long time since I wrote the fic, the fire still burns.

Thanks for reading, and I wish you well on your journeys.