5 years later
Jake and I handled the rest of our divorce through our attorney's. I didn't ask for anything, so it was fairly quick. I did continue with the DNA test, just to be sure and have solid proof, so he didn't try to come back later on and try to claim my baby, when I wasn't expecting it.
I named him Edward Jasper after his real father and the one man, who I knew I could count on. We called him EJ for short. The only people who knew I had given him his father's name were Alice and Jasper. He was the spitting image of Edward. It was almost hard to look at him and not cry sometimes. I loved my child more than anything, but seeing the face of Edward every day, only made me miss him even more.
Over the last five years, I'd contemplated trying to contact him. But some way or another I'd always talk myself out of it. I was probably the last person he wanted to see and he definitely would not want to find out he had a child I hid from him for five years.
"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," EJ yelled, jumping on my bed. "Get up, we need to go."
"Monkey, give mommy a few more minutes," I whined.
"But mom, you promised," he reminded.
"I know," I sighed. "Let me take a quick shower and I'll be ready."
"Okay," he agreed. He jumped off my bed and ran across the room for the door. He truly was a monkey. As soon as he learned to walk, he was jumping and climbing. I couldn't contain him half the time. Thankfully, Jasper was quite the animal himself. He spent many days and nights playing with him and wearing him out. Jasper, Alice, my mom and Phil, helped me out tremendously with him. Once I went back to work, they all took turns watching him for me. I was able to switch my work hours to mornings, so it wasn't so hard on all of them watching him. I couldn't have done it without them. They all loved him and spoiled him rotten.
EJ was five years old now and just about to start kindergarten. I had promised him I would take him school shopping today after we got him registered at the school. He was so excited to start school. We even began counting down days until the first day of school.
After I got ready for the day, I walked out into the kitchen where Alice was making breakfast for her and EJ. I grabbed a coffee cup off the shelf and poured myself a cup.
"So, today's the big day, huh?" she asked. "Today the little monkey boy, gets registered for kindergarten. She ruffled his hair and placed a plate of pancakes in front of him. He smiled and grabbed his fork.
"Auntie Alice, are you coming with us today?" he wondered.
"You expect me to pass up a day of shopping?" she questioned with a grin on her face. She looked over in my direction, making sure it was okay first. I smiled at her and nodded my head. It would be nice for all of us to get out of the house for the day.
I got EJ ready and packed up all the paperwork I needed for registration. He was jumping off the walls with excitement.
"Come on, Mommy," he whined.
"I'm coming." I walked out the door and helped him into his seat. Alice walked out shortly after me and climbed in the passenger seat of my new car. With all the money I had saved in preparation for a custody battle and didn't use, I bought myself a newer car. It was only a simple Volvo, but it worked for us.
We drove across town to the elementary school. EJ looked up at the school in amazement. For the first time in a long time, he didn't talk or jump around. Alice and I gave each other a knowing smile.
We walked in and noticed many other kids with their parent's registering for school. EJ seemed to study each and every one of them closely. He always seemed to study people. It reminded me of his father. The way Edward looked at a person and practically knew their life story was exactly what my son did. There was no denying he was Edward's son. I imagined his hyperactivity was a trait he inherited from his father, too.
I got all the paperwork filled out and we even got to go to his soon to be classroom and meet his teacher, Emily Young. His teacher was so sweet to him and even sat with him for a moment to talk about school and what he was most excited about.
After we left, we went over to the mall and shopped for some new school clothes. Alice picked most of his stuff out and of course everything she showed him, he wanted. For whatever reason, he had a connection to Alice and thought she was the coolest person in the world. He wanted to do everything she was doing.
We stopped in the food court, for a late lunch, after we had shopped most of the day.
"Mommy, can I go play some video games?" he asked.
"Not until you're done eating."
"Auntie Alice, will you come with me?" he begged, giving her his best pouty look.
"You know I can never say no to that face," she gave in.
"Finish eating, first," I ordered.
We finished eating and walked EJ over to the video game store. He found an open game and started playing. It amazed me how kids as young as he was, could play these games with such ease. When I tried to play a game, I ended up lost in the world we were playing in. I was not good at video games at all and it seemed like many times EJ was trying to teach me how to play. He would get so frustrated with me when I didn't go in the right direction or find something I was supposed to find.
Alice and I stood a ways behind him and watched.
"So," Alice began. I could hear the hopeful, serious, tone in her voice. I turned in her direction, waiting for whatever it was she was about to say. "Jasper said he'd watch EJ this Friday night. I thought maybe we could go to a club or something."
Great, I thought to myself. This was yet another one of her attempts of trying to find me a guy. Through the years she had tried to set me up with at least a dozen guys. Some of them were really nice, but I wasn't looking for anyone.
"Alice," I whined.
"Bella, come on. It's been what, almost six years? I know you still have this thing for EJ's father, but since you refuse to contact him, you need to get out there and find another guy. Don't you think EJ deserves to have a father figure in his life? Don't you think you deserve a man in your life? I mean, Bella, how long has it been since… you know," she insinuated. I blushed at her question. I was thankful she didn't say anything out loud considering the amount of kids, including mine, who were surrounding us. However, I wished she wouldn't ask me personal questions like this at all, especially not in a public place.
"My life revolves around my child. He's all that matters to me. I don't need anything else. And he has enough male role models in his life with Jasper and Phil around. They're both great with him and will teach him everything he needs to know about being a boy."
"But he needs a dad," she argued.
"Lots of kids don't have dads. They grow up just fine."
She sighed. "Fine, will you at least go to a club with me and have a couple drinks?"
"I'm too old to go to clubs. I'm almost thirty-one Alice," I laughed.
"And who says your thirties are too old to go out and have fun?" she added.
"I'm going to drop these bags off at the book store." I changed the subject, knowing I was never going to win this argument with her. "They're getting heavy and we still have a lot more shopping to do. I'm sure Mr. Caius will let me store them in the back and we can pick them up when we're done."
"Great way of changing the subject, Bella," Alice accused.
I smiled sheepishly. "Can you watch him for a minute? I'll be right back." She nodded her head. The look on her face told me she was far from done with the conversation.
I walked over to the book store and met Mr. Caius at the front desk.
"Hi, Bella," he greeted. "What are you doing here on your day off?"
"I took EJ to get registered for kindergarten this morning. Now we're doing some school shopping." I held up the bags so he could see.
"Well, where is he?" he asked, looking around. "I haven't seen him in quite a while."
"He's over at the video game store with Alice," I explained. His shoulders dropped in disappointment.
"Oh. I knew I should have started a video arcade instead of a book store. That's where all the money is."
I laughed at his comment. "Would it be okay if I stored these bags in the back so I don't have to carry them around with me all day?" I asked.
"Of course, it's no problem. As long as you bring little EJ by after you're done shopping. I have a gift for him," he bargained.
"You are just as bad as his grandparent's and Alice and Jasper," I accused with a giggle.
"It's just a new book I thought he might like to check out. I know how much he likes dinosaurs and this book is perfect for him. He's going to love it. Besides, any kid who loves to read just as much as he loves to play video games, deserves a little special treat every once in a while," he defended, with a smile.
I shook my head, laughing at his way of justifying him spoiling my son. I walked to the back and placed the bags against the wall. I told Mr. Caius goodbye and walked back out into the mall. I walked slowly, giving EJ a little more time to play and in an attempt to avoid any more conversation with Alice.
I walked around the corner and bumped into someone. "Oh, sorry," we both apologized, simultaneously. I looked up at who it was, and there standing directly in front of me, was Edward. The man I hadn't seen in years. I blinked my eyes over and over. I was sure he was just my imagination playing tricks on me. My heart stopped beating and I felt like I couldn't breathe, when he didn't turn into something else. He was still right there, staring back at me with the same shocked and dumbfounded look on his face. Neither of us said a word.
"Mommy, Mommy, guess what?" I gasped in fear when I heard EJ call. I turned my head and saw him running towards me with a video game waving in his hands.
"EJ, wait for me," Alice yelled. "Edward Jasper Swan, you wait for me."
"Guess what, Mommy?" he asked, coming to a screeching halt in front of me. "Auntie Alice bought me a new video game." I smiled down at him. I felt like my entire body was shaking. I knew my heart was going to punch through my chest at any moment.
I dared a glance up at Edward. He was staring at my child with a gaping mouth and a furrowed brow. I knew he could tell. He slowly leaned down to EJ.
"You're name's Edward?" he asked politely. EJ nodded his head happily. If he only knew who he was talking to right now, I thought. "My name's Edward, too. It's a pretty cool name, huh?" EJ smiled at him with agreement.
"Oh shit," Alice gasped, finally reaching up to us. She knew. I looked at her with wide eyes, pleading with her for some sort of help. I didn't know what to do.
"What game did you get?" Edward asked. EJ held out the game and explained everything about it and what all the characters names were. I couldn't register anything he said though. All I knew was I was in a huge mess and I didn't know how to get out of it.
Edward glanced up at me with confusion and anger in his eyes. My head dropped in shame. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.
"You know what," Alice announced. "I'm in the mood for some ice cream. EJ would you like to get some ice cream with me?" He jumped up and down with excitement. She reached out her hand for his, giving me a quick look of encouragement. I forced a smile, thanking her for taking him.
I slowly raised my eyes to Edward's, biting my bottom lip. He was still watching my child, his child, walk away. As soon as he was out of sight, he turned his attention back on me. He stared at me like he was waiting for some sort of explanation. However, nothing I could possibly say would make any of this better.
"I can explain," I cried. I…"
"He's mine isn't he?" he asked, interrupting me. Tears began falling down my face. I nodded my head to answer him. He let out a long breath, and ran his fingers through his hair, thinking things over.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean…"
"I have to go to a meeting," he interrupted again. "I only stopped here for a minute to pick up a new shirt." I waited for him to say something more. I assumed he'd be mad and demand answers. "Will you meet with me later? Please?" I took a deep breath and nodded my head in agreement. He told me to meet him at a place called Eleven South at eight. He seemed like he wanted to say so much more, but he kept looking at his watch and sighing. He left, and I took a minute to catch my breath, before walking over to where Alice and EJ were.
Alice looked at me with concern in her eyes. EJ was oblivious to anything going on.
"So, what happened? she asked.
"He wants me to meet him later. He said he had to get to a meeting," I answered.
"Does he know?"
"Yes," I cried. She reached out her hand for mine, in an attempt to comfort me. "What if he tries to take him? I can't handle it again."
"Bella, just tell him the truth. Hopefully everything will work out and it won't end up being a bad thing," she assured.
"Mommy, why are you sad?" EJ asked.
"Nothing baby, I'm fine." I smiled down at him and rubbed his back. I leaned down and kissed the top of his head, while he ate his ice cream.
I wasn't in the mood to do any more shopping, but we kept going. Alice made sure to help EJ with everything, so I wouldn't have to. I had so many thoughts running through my head. I couldn't believe I ran into him after all these years. He looked exactly the same as I remembered him. He had definitely grown up and was much more sophisticated now. My biggest fear was he would want to take my baby away from me. He could try to fight me in court for him. I knew if he demanded a DNA test like Jake had, all those years ago, it would come up a positive match. I couldn't afford a court battle. I knew I should have never spent the money I had saved the first time, on a car. I should have been preparing for this possibility all along.
Later that night, after I got EJ settled down for the night and he was watching cartoons with Jasper in the living room, Alice helped me get ready. She treated this like it was some sort of a date. She picked out revealing dresses and caked on the make-up. I finally had to tell her to take it easy. She seemed perturbed I was asking her to calm down, but she did. I picked out a light grey spaghetti strap dress. It hit just below the knees and wasn't too revealing or flashy. It was simple. I wanted simple for this. Alice of course scoffed at the dress and thought I needed to wear something a little nicer, but I wouldn't budge on what I picked out. I took off all the make-up she had caked on my face and added just a touch of lip gloss. I left my hair down, only blow-drying it for a little volume. This wasn't a date, so I didn't need to dress like it was. I was sure I'd probably end up crying at some point in the night anyway, so what was the point of getting all dolled up?
I kissed the top of EJ's head and hugged him goodbye. Alice and Jasper assured me he would be fine and they'd get him to bed for me.
I drove across town and pulled into the parking lot. I wanted to cry before I even got out of the car. I had no idea what to expect.
I walked up to the doors and was greeted by the hostess. "Good evening."
"Hi, I'm here to meet Edward, uh… Cullen." I had to pause for a second to remember what his last name was.
"Of course, you must be Bella? Mr. Cullen has asked me to tell you he's running a little late from his meeting and asks if you'll wait for him. I can show you to your table and start you off with a drink, if you'd like?"
"That'll be fine." I followed her through the crowd to a secluded table in the corner. I quickly looked over the drink menu and ordered a pomegranate martini. I thought maybe the alcohol would calm my nerves a little.
I waited for nearly forty-five minutes for him to show up. I kept telling myself five more minutes and I'm leaving. However, I couldn't go through with it. So, I continued to wait. When he finally showed up, he looked frazzled and irritated. I knew this wasn't going to be good.
"I'm sorry I'm late. I had no idea my meeting was going to take so long," he apologized.
"It's fine," I assured.
"Did you order something to eat already?" he asked.
I shook my head. "I'm not hungry."
"Are you sure? It's my treat."
"No, thank you."
"Okay," he said, letting it go.
I took a deep breath knowing I needed to get this over with. "I'm sure you want answers."
"It would be nice," he agreed.
"Is there anything specific you want to know?" I asked, looking down at the table. I was having a hard time looking him in the face without feeling guilty.
"Why didn't you tell me? You knew how to find me. You knew where my family lived. You knew where I was going to school. Why didn't you come find me?" he wondered.
"The last time I saw you, you were running away to nowhere specific, because you hated school and you got in a huge fight with your dad. How was I supposed to know you went back to school or were even talking to your parents?"
"You didn't even try, Bella," he accused. "You told me to go back and I did. I did it for you. You couldn't even give me the courtesy of letting me know I had a child?" I could hear the anger and frustration in his voice.
"I'm sorry. I thought it would be better this way. I didn't want to ruin your life with a child you probably didn't want."
"So, you decided what you thought was best for everyone. You didn't stop to think how this would affect me or affect him? You didn't consider my feelings in any of this. Are you that selfish you couldn't even give me the decency of letting me decide for myself whether or not I wanted to be involved? This is really fucked up, Bella."
"I'm sorry," I cried. There wasn't much else I could say. He was right about everything.
He sat back in his chair and sighed, heavily. "Where is he now?"
"He's with my roommate and her boyfriend. They're family to him. He's known them since he was born and he's safe with them." I wanted to assure him EJ was happy and healthy and well taken care of.
He laughed, shaking his head. "It's really screwed up, that he sees your roommate as family and doesn't even know who his father is," he insinuated. I felt horrible. I didn't know what he wanted me to do. "I want to see him. I have a right to be his father."
My eyes shot up to his. "You can't. Please Edward, he's all I have. He's everything to me. I already had to go through a custody battle. I can't do it again. You can't take him from me," I pleaded, beginning to cry. He reached out his hand for mine and took it in his, in a comforting way.
"I didn't say anything about taking him from you," he assured. "I just want to get to know him. I want to be a father to him."
"So, you don't plan to sue for custody?" I asked, making sure, that's what he meant.
"Not unless you refuse to let me see him."
I sighed in relief. "Okay, we can work something out." He nodded his head in agreement and slid his hand back across the table. I put mine back in my lap and sat back.
"How did it happen?" he asked. I gave him a questioning look. How could he not know how it happened? "I mean, I know how it happened. But… during the uh… well you said it was okay. I assumed you were on birth control or something."
"No," I answered, embarrassed. "I thought you were just worried about hurting me. I wasn't really thinking at the time. The day before, I found out the in vitro fertilization my ex-husband and I had tried, failed. I guess I just assumed I couldn't get pregnant. I thought it was a lost cause and the farthest thing from my mind that night."
We sat silently for a few minutes. I glanced up at him periodically. He was staring at me intently. I knew what he was doing, he was studying me. It made me uncomfortable.
"So, how did you end up in Jacksonville Florida?" he wondered.
"My mom and step-dad live here. I'm happy here. I have friends. I have a good job. EJ is well taken of and has lots of people who love him. He's starting school in just a couple weeks." I smiled at the thought of him. "He's so excited. We had to register him today and he got to meet his teacher and see his classroom."
"Will I be able to meet his teachers every year?" he asked.
"I guess it all depends on what you want. I'm not asking you to be a part of his life if you don't want to. I won't ever ask for child support or anything else. We're fine the way we are. He's happy and well taken care of."
"You keep saying he's well taken care of. Do you think I'm going to doubt your abilities as a mother?" he questioned.
"My ex did. He thought I was crazy. Even before he was born I was already going through a custody battle. My ex didn't believe I had cheated on him and he assumed I was lying to get out of going back to him. He threatened to take EJ away from me and I'd never see him again. He made me feel like I wasn't good enough to be a mom. All the way to the end, I had to endure his presence in my life. Even at the birth, he was there."
"But once he saw my eyes and not his own, he knew," Edward finished. I glanced up at him and nodded my head in agreement. "It's the first thing I noticed. He has my eyes."
"He has everything from you. It was so hard to look at him sometimes. I always saw you."
"Do you hate me that much you can't even look at me?" he wondered, with a hurt expression.
"No… it's not… I just…," I stumbled over my words, but nothing I could say would come out right. "I just felt guilty for what I did."
"What did you do?"
I scoffed at his question. "I cheated on my husband. And not only did I cheat, but I did it with someone who was only a child. I left you stranded in a hotel room. I didn't tell you about your son. I didn't think about your feelings in any of this. I just thought I was doing the right thing by not telling you. I wanted you to have a better life. I didn't want you tied down to me or a child you didn't want. But I guess I was wrong."
"What makes you think I didn't want to be tied down to you or that I wouldn't want a child?" he asked. "And for the record, I wasn't a child. I was eighteen and fully aware of what I was doing. It's not like you took advantage of me."
I was lost for words. I didn't know how to respond to him. I swiped at my eyes with my finger. There was no way I could fix any of this.
"So, where do we go from here?" he asked.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I guess if you want to see him, we can set a time and place and I'll bring him. My only request is you don't tell him you're his father, yet. I don't want to confuse him. I need to ease him into this." He nodded in agreement even though I could tell he wasn't happy about it.
"Why did you name him Edward?" he asked.
"I wanted to give him his father's name. He was you." He watched me closely once again. I wanted to leave so bad.
"Does he like going to the park?" he asked.
I rolled my eyes and tilted my head. "What five year old doesn't like going to the park?" I asked sarcastically.
He grinned, shyly. "Can you meet me at a park tomorrow, so I can play with him? We can have lunch afterwards or something."
"Okay," I agreed. I gave him the name of a park near our house and told him what time to meet us. He said he'd be there. He paid for my drink, leaving a rather large tip on top of it. He walked me out to my car and we said our goodbyes.
I cried all the way home. I was thankful, at least for now, he wasn't going to try to take my child away from me. But the closer they got and the more he got to know his son, the more he was going to want. I didn't know if he lived in the area or if he was just here for a short time. I guessed I should have asked him more questions, but I was too nervous to ask anything.
All night long, I sat on the edge of EJ's bed, contemplating what I should do. I thought maybe I needed to contact an attorney again, just to be prepared. But I didn't want to keep Edward from his son. He deserved a chance to get to know him. He deserved a chance to be a father. As hard as it may be for me to let him go, I had to give him this. My child deserved to know his father too. It would be wrong of me to keep him from his father.
I watched as the sun rose outside and a beam of light hit EJ's face. I gently pushed a strand of hair behind his ear. He opened his eyes and grinned up at me. He had the same grin Edward had last night.
"Morning, Mommy," he said.
I smiled down at him. "Good morning, baby. What would you like to do today?"
"Play my video game," he answered.
I nodded my head. "For a little while you can. We're going to the park around lunch time to meet an old friend of mine."
"We're going to the park?" he asked, excitedly. "Who are we meeting?"
"Do you remember the man you met at the mall, yesterday?"
"The man, who had the same name as me," he clarified.
"Yes, that man. We're going to meet him. He wants to play with you and take us to lunch."
"Are you going to be there, too?" he wondered.
"Of course, I am. I wouldn't leave you there with someone you don't know very well. But I want you to have fun today with him, okay?"
"Mommy?" he asked. I hummed in response. "Why does he have the same name as me?"
"There's lots of Edward's in this world. There's lots of Bella and Alice's. Just like there are lots of mommies in the world. Edward is a popular name. Now get up and let's go play that video game." He crawled out of bed and ran down the hall to the living room. We sat down on the couch and played the game together for a long time. Alice and Jasper eventually got out of bed and joined us in the living room. Jasper took over my controller and Alice motioned for me to follow her to the kitchen.
"So, what happened?" she asked.
"He wants to see him. He asked me to meet him at the park today and bring EJ with me. I'm so scared, Alice. I didn't sleep at all. He said he wouldn't take him away from me, but if he gets close to him, he's going to want more and more time with him. It's only a matter of time before he wants him permanently."
"Bella, you're jumping to conclusions. You have no way of knowing that. I'm sure something can be worked out. Divorced couples make it work every day."
"But we're not divorced, Alice. I kept his son from him out of my own possessiveness. I didn't want to share him. He was really angry last night."
"Well, all I can say is you need to make it work somehow. I'll fight for you and EJ if it comes to a custody battle and so will Jasper. But I think he needs his father in his life, so I hope you can work something out with him."
"I need to take a shower. I'll be right back," I announced.
"Of course you do. You always have to do something when we're in the middle of a serious conversation," she accused. I knew I always changed the subject or found some sort of an excuse when we were in conversations I didn't want to discuss with her. But I didn't like serious conversations. I always seemed to get in trouble when I did.
I went to the bathroom and got in the shower letting myself cry once again. This was becoming too much to handle. I thought dealing with Jake was bad, but this seemed so much worse. This was real. I couldn't hand over a DNA test and say get out of my life. I had to face what happened and the choices I made and learn how to live with them for the sake of my child.
Around eleven, I had EJ take a bath and I picked out a nice outfit for him. He begged to wear his new school clothes, but I knew he'd end up getting them filthy, so I made him wear something else. I combed his hair and put on his shoes.
I dressed in a simple blue blouse with a pair of jeans and sandals.
I told EJ he could bring his bucket and shovel and a couple of his trucks to play in the sand. He was so excited. He had a permanent grin on his face and skipped all the way to the park. We didn't live far, so we walked.
I spotted Edward standing near the playground, waiting for us. As soon as he saw us he walked over, meeting us half way. He leaned down to EJ's level and smiled at him.
"Hi, EJ," he greeted. "I see you brought some toys to play in the sand. Would you mind if I played with you?"
He glanced up at me, asking for permission. I nodded my head and let go of his hand. Edward held out his hand for him and he took it. I watched as they walked together over to the sand pit and sat down. I found a bench nearby and collapsed against it. I laid my head in my hands and cried. I knew I had to do this, but it was hard.
After a while, I felt someone sit down next to me and rub my back. I shot up and came face to face with Edward. I wiped my tears away and sniffled.
"Can I ask why you're crying?"
I shook my head. "It's nothing."
"Bella, I'm not going to take him from you. I would never hurt you like that. You're a good mom. I can tell just by the way he interacts with me. He's so smart. He even asked me if I was his dad. He already knows."
"What did you tell him?" I asked, panicked he may have broke our agreement.
"I told him he needed to talk to you. I didn't know what else to say. But he knows Bella, and I want him to know."
"Then I need to ask you some questions," I informed.
"Okay, shoot."
"Where do you live?"
"Seattle."
"What do you do for a living?"
"I'm an engineer. I work with my brother-in-law, Emmett."
"Are you married or do you have a girlfriend?" He paused, looking at me with questioning eyes. "I need to know if he's going to have a step-mom or some other mother figure in his life. I want to know they aren't going to resent him or be mean to him in any way if he ever spends time with you when I'm not around."
"No, Bella. I'm not married and I don't have a girlfriend. The only people he may have contact with would be my family. I called them last night and told them. My dad's skeptical and wants a DNA test done, but my mom and sister are thrilled and can't wait to meet him."
"If, and this is a big if, I was ever to let him go to Seattle to visit you, I don't want him in Forks. I know it's where your parents live, but I can't risk him being seen by my ex. I don't know if he would even know it was him or if he'd do anything, but I don't trust him."
"Who's your ex?" he wondered.
"Jacob Black," I answered. He started to laugh.
"Well, you don't need to worry about him then. He lost his shop after the police found out he was using hot parts. Apparently, the rumor is, he was also running drugs on the side."
"Are you serious?" I asked. I was shocked and had no idea.
"Yeah, he lost everything. He's serving time in prison for what he did."
"I always wondered where he got all his money. It seemed a little odd to make so much, just from a small town mechanic shop," I admitted.
"So, Jake's the one who hurt you and put you through hell throughout the pregnancy?" I nodded my head to answer him.
"Bella, I promise you, I won't ever hurt you. All I want is to be a part of his life. I'll even move here if it makes things easier."
"You'll move here? What about your job?" I wondered.
"Well, Emmett's been thinking, of branching out in the company. So, I just found the best sales pitch to get him to agree. I need to be down here for a few months anyway because of a job. I'll just make it permanent. I can start up a business here and I can spend time with EJ. And you." He said the last part so quietly, I could barely hear him. I wasn't sure what he meant by it.
"Mommy," EJ called. "Come see what I made." I stood to my feet and walked over to the sand box. He had made tracks in the sand for his trucks and a huge hill the trucks had to climb up. Edward stood next to me and listened intently to him tell us all about what he made.
We stayed a little longer, letting EJ play in the sand. Edward took him over to the swing for a while too and they chased each other through the climbing structure. For the first time, I smiled as I watched them play. Maybe this could work out. He seemed sincere in what he was saying.
"Mommy, I'm hungry," EJ said when they both came over to where I was sitting.
"I saw a burger place around the corner. We could go there for lunch," Edward offered.
I agreed and the three of us walked over to the restaurant. It was a place we'd been before. We walked in and found a booth. EJ grabbed the crayons on the table and started coloring his paper.
"Can I help you?" the waitress asked.
Edward gestured for me to go first. "He'll have the kids chicken strip basket with a chocolate shake and I'll have the cheeseburger basket with a chocolate shake."
"And for you sir?" she asked.
He grinned, looking across the table at me. "I'll have the same."
We watched EJ color, silently.
When the food came a little while later, I made EJ put his coloring away, so he could eat.
"So, do you still dip your French fries in your shake?" Edward asked.
I looked up at him and smiled. I was sure I was blushing too. I grabbed a fry and dipped it in my shake, and popped it in my mouth, answering his question. He laughed.
He grabbed one of his French fries and dipped it in his own shake. I raised an eyebrow at him. He shrugged his shoulders. "Once I was introduced to it, I couldn't stop." I laughed at him. "Does EJ dip his fries in his shake too?" he wondered.
"No," I replied, grabbing the ketchup. "Like I said, he's exactly like you." I squirted the ketchup on his plate and he started eating them. I didn't realize my slip up, until I noticed Edward staring at me.
"Are you going to tell him?" he asked.
"I already know," EJ cut in, surprising us both. He looked up at me. "He's my dad. I heard you and Auntie Alice talking about how I was named after my dad. His name is Edward, my name is Edward. He's my dad."
"What do you think about him being your dad?" I asked.
He shrugged his shoulders. "I like him. He's fun." Edward smiled from across the table.
"Would you like it if I was around more?" Edward asked him.
"Yeah," he expressed, excitedly.
"Good, because I plan to be around for a long time," Edward informed.
We finished eating our food and left the place. EJ was so adamant about his new dad coming back to meet his Auntie Alice and Uncle Jasper. He was hesitant at first, but I assured him it was fine. We walked the few blocks back to the condo and walked inside. Jasper and Alice were in the living room. Jasper was watching TV while Alice was painting a new picture at her easel.
They both turned their heads, glancing back and forth between me and Edward.
"Auntie Alice, Uncle Jasper, guess what?" EJ shouted, jumping on the couch. "Edward is my dad."
"Is that so?" Jasper asked.
"Yep and he's going to come visit me and take me to cool places and play video games with me." He paused for a minute and turned back to Edward. "Can you stay and play video games with me right now?" he asked.
"Sure," Edward agreed, with a smile.
"Um, Edward this is my roommate and best friend, Alice and her boyfriend, Jasper," I introduced. He walked across the room and shook both of their hands politely.
"Come on, dad," EJ demanded. I noticed Edward smile hugely when EJ called him dad.
I walked over to Alice's side. "Well, it looks like all of you have taken to this new development rather well," she observed.
"I think things are going to be okay. I don't know what the future holds, but for now I think we'll all be okay."
Edward stayed for the rest of the day. He played video games with EJ and talked to Jasper quite a bit. Jasper, always the protective one, was overly curious about who this guy was and what his intentions were.
Alice invited him to stay for dinner and he accepted gladly. After dinner, he helped give EJ a bath and lied with him on his bed and read him the dinosaur book Mr. Caius had given him the day before. Everything seemed to be going just fine. I was actually feeling really good about Edward being around.
Once EJ had fallen asleep, he slipped out from under him and walked out to the hall, where I was standing and watching. He motioned for me to follow him with a serious look on his face. It concerned me. What was going to happen now?
I followed him outside and down to the parking lot. I forgot we had walked here, meaning he didn't have a car. If he did have a car, he left it at the park.
"Would you like me to give you a ride over to your car?" I asked.
"No, its fine, I can walk. I don't want you to have to leave him."
"He's with Jasper and Alice. He's fine," I assured. I didn't want him to start questioning their abilities with him. Jasper and Alice have always been great with him.
"I know. I would rather you stay though," he explained. "Look, I have to fly home in the morning. I don't want to leave, but I need to be back for work. I'm going to look into moving down here as soon as I can. I want to be able to call him every day, if it's okay."
"Sure," I agreed. "He starts school in a couple weeks though. So, there may be times he won't be available. If you want to call around his bedtime every night…"
"Would you be opposed to moving in with me when I move down here?" he interrupted.
"Excuse me?" I asked, lost for words.
"I don't want to miss anymore of his life. I've already missed five years because of you. The least you could do is let me have as much time as possible with him from now on. He needs a room of his own anyway. He needs his own space. I could give him that," he insisted.
"In other words, you want to take him from me, because you don't think I can provide for him what he needs," I added. "This is exactly what I thought would happen. I knew you were going to try to take him."
"Did you not hear the part where I said I wanted you to live with me, too?" he asked. "I don't want to take him from you. All I want is what I've missed all these years. I want to be able to be a father. Not someone who comes in every other weekend to take him somewhere and spend time with him. I want to be a part of every little thing. I want to be there when he's sick or scared. I want to be there for soccer practice or music recitals. I want to be able to read him a book every night before bed. Do you have any idea how great it felt to have him call me dad earlier? But, at the same time, it killed me because I missed out on all of it for five years."
"I'm sorry. I don't know how many more times I can say, I'm sorry. What do you want me to do to make up for it?"
"I want you to agree to move in with me. I'll start looking for a three bedroom apartment or maybe even a house with a backyard. I'll take care of all living expenses, if you just agree to let me have him in my life permanently."
"It would be awkward living together and you know that," I worried. "How would it work for us? How would we make it work?"
"I'll give you your space. I won't interfere in anything you do. I just want to be involved in EJ's life and I want us to be able to make decisions together where he's concerned," he informed.
I sighed. "I can't give you an answer right now. I'll have to think about it and let you know."
"I figured you would. I'll uh, be in touch and hopefully back here in a few weeks, if not sooner."
"Alright," I said.
He stared at me for a few seconds, before quickly moving closer to me and kissing me lightly on the cheek. "Thank you for today. This has definitely been one of the best days of my life." He smiled and walked away to head back to his car.
The following weeks, he called every night at exactly six pm. He talked to EJ for usually about fifteen minutes. EJ had to tell him everything about each day and let him know how many more days until he started school. Every night he'd ask if Edward was going to be back in time to take him to school on the first day. Edward assured him he'd be back. At the end of their conversations, EJ would hand me the phone and Edward would ask me how he was doing and if there was anything new going on he should know about. Then he'd ask if I'd given any more thought to moving in with him. I'd thought about it every day since he suggested it and as much as I wanted to make up for what I did to him, I didn't feel right about living with him. So I would always tell him I was considering my options and we'd discuss it more when he was back. He never seemed to like my answer, though.
On EJ's first day of school, just like he promised, Edward showed up at our door to drive EJ to school. EJ was jumping off the walls with excitement. He couldn't wait to see his classroom.
Edward drove us to the school. We walked EJ into his classroom and helped him get his stuff put away. We walked over to the teacher and she talked to EJ for a few minutes, telling him how excited she was to see him and how she hopes he enjoys school. Then, she asked us to pose for a family photo for a scrapbook she would put together for each child at the end of the year. I glanced at Edward, nervously. EJ of course, didn't see anything wrong with this and grabbed both of our hands, dragging us over to where the camera was. He crawled up on the stool and Edward and I stood behind him. We both placed a hand on each of his shoulders and Edward placed his other hand on the small of my back. I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat. This was odd. We weren't like all the other happy families in the classroom. We smiled for the picture and I quickly moved away from Edward as soon as the camera flashed. He seemed stunned I moved away so fast.
After a few more minutes of making sure EJ was comfortable in his class, we left. The drive back home was awkward. Neither of us said a thing. He pulled into the parking lot and I opened the door to get out.
"Have you made a decision yet?" he asked.
I paused at the door and sat back down in the seat. He didn't look at me. He stared at the steering wheel, waiting for an answer.
"No," I answered. "I'm not ready to make that big of a move, at least not yet. I think it would be confusing for EJ and I don't want to overwhelm him. I mean, he's only had a father for a few weeks."
"And whose fault is that?" he countered, angrily.
"See, this is why it would never work living together. Every day you would find some way to remind me of how I hurt you. I can't live like that. I know I hurt you and I feel horrible about it. But how many more times do you expect me to say I'm sorry?"
"I don't expect you to say anything. What I want is for you to make this better. I want this to work for all of us."
"I'm not saying, no. I'm just saying, not yet," I argued.
He sighed heavily. "Fine," he agreed. "I'd like to talk to an attorney…"
"What?" I shouted. "You promised."
"Calm down and let me finish," he requested. "All I want is to have my name put on his birth certificate, so I can legally be his father and have some rights. I think it'll require a DNA test, so I hope that's okay. My dad suggested I do this anyway. I know he's mine. I don't need the DNA test to know he's mine. But I just want it official and documented. I'm not doing it for any other reason."
"Okay, fine." I climbed out of the car and watched him pull out of the parking lot angrily. I knew he was upset, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't live with him and pretend everything was perfect. Nothing about this situation was perfect or remotely tolerable.
I walked towards the stairs to head up to the condo. When suddenly I heard a car, come to a screeching halt behind me. I turned around to see Edward jumping out of his car and walking towards me quickly. It scared me. I wanted to run.
"Do you have any idea how fucked up this is?" he shouted. "I'm the one making all the sacrifices to be a part of his life. I'm the one who is changing my entire life around and trying to do everything possible to make this situation work for you. Yet you aren't even trying to make any effort to let me be a part of his life. I was the one hurt in this situation or did you forget that? Have you even thought about what's going to happen if he ever asks why I wasn't there for him the first five years of his life? How am I supposed to answer him? How am I supposed to tell him, your mother didn't tell me about you? Don't you think it might cause him to have a little resentment towards you? You're so worried about me going to court to fight for custody and I'm starting to wonder if I need to. You aren't the victim here. EJ and I are the victims. You are the one who caused us to be the victims. You should be the one doing everything possible to make this right." He shook his head angrily and walked back to his car, without letting me say a word in response. I let out a shaky breath once he was gone and slowly walked back up the condo.
Alice greeted me as soon as I walked in. "So, how did it go? Did he have any anxiety about his first day?"
"He did fine." I answered. My voice was shaking when I said it.
"Bella, what's wrong?" she asked, with a serious expression. She sat me down on the couch and I told her what happened with Edward and even about his offer, since I hadn't told her about it, yet. She listened intently to everything I was saying before she commented on any of it.
"Bella, I know you're probably not going to like me for saying this, but he's right. You need to stop looking at him as the enemy and start working together. As much as I'd hate for you and EJ to move out, I really think it might benefit both of you to move in with him. EJ needs a father and he seems really happy to have Edward in his life. Let him have that, without feeling like its wrong. I know it's going to be hard at first, but I think things will work out for the better in the long run. You need to think about what's best for EJ, not how hard it's going to be for you."
"So, you're saying I'm selfish too," I complained.
"I'm not saying your selfish, Bella. You give up everything for EJ. You make huge sacrifices for him every day. But right now, honestly, I think you're afraid of what you feel for Edward still and you're afraid of being hurt. He's mad at you and it's hard for you to take in. I also think you're worried EJ might want to be with Edward more than you." I hated her for being right. I knew it had a lot to do with my decision. I couldn't live with him, knowing I still had feelings for him. It was hard enough being in the same vicinity as him.
"I need to get ready for work," I said, changing the subject. She rolled her eyes and sighed. I knew I'd changed the subject again and she was irritated with me for it. But I really did need to get ready.
I was distracted all day and barely got any work done. I had to figure out how to make it work. He was right. He was making all the sacrifices and I wasn't giving him much. He needed to have more time with EJ. But I was terrified to live with him.
I got off in time to pick up EJ, but I knew Edward would be there and it scared me to have to face him again. I pulled into the parking lot and walked over to where all the parent's were standing to wait for their kids. I saw Edward instantly. He saw me and slowly began walking towards me.
"I'm sorry about this morning. I shouldn't have yelled at you like I did," he apologized.
"No, you were right," I argued. "I haven't been fair to you at all. You are making a lot of sacrifices and actually being amazingly understanding through all of this. I need to be more supportive of you and EJ's relationship and give you more time with him. I'm not ready to move in with you, but I'll give you more time with him."
"You will?" he questioned.
"Yeah, as much time as you need," I agreed.
"Thank you," he accepted. I nodded my head. We both turned when we heard the kids coming out the doors. We watched for EJ and as soon as he saw us, he came running with a huge grin on his face.
"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," he yelled. He jumped up into my arms and hugged me tightly. It made me feel good. I was still the first one he came to. "Guess what? I made friends today and we made art projects and we got to put a puzzle together and we played on the playground. I had the best day, today." He was so excited about telling me everything, he wouldn't stop.
"I'm glad you had a good day, today. Do you like your teacher and all your classmates?" I asked, still holding him in my arms.
"Yep," he replied. "And guess what else? Tomorrow we get to go to the library and check out books. I told my teacher I already have lots of books because my mommy works at a bookstore, but she said I still get to check one out. Isn't that exciting?"
"It is exciting. I can't wait to see what you pick out for us to read together," I answered.
"Maybe sometime you and I can read together, too," Edward suggested. EJ turned in his direction and smiled at him.
"You'll read to me too, dad?" he asked.
"Absolutely," he answered, putting his hands out for EJ. EJ leaped into his arms and gave him a huge hug. "I'll read to you anytime you want me too." Edward held him close and breathed him in. For the first time, I began to think Edward may end up being a really good father to EJ. I just needed to give him the chance.
"So, what are we doing today?" EJ asked.
"Well, I am moving into my new house. My brother-in-law is supposed to be driving in later today with my stuff. I came early so I didn't miss your first day of school. Maybe in a couple days, once I get everything set up, you can come over and spend the night. I'm going to have an entire room set up, just for you," Edward informed.
EJ smiled. "Really? Just for me?"
"Just for you," he agreed, chuckling at EJ's enthusiasm. "So, the rest of this week, I'm going to be pretty busy. I'll still come every day to take you to school and pick you up, if you'd like. But I really want to get my house set up, so you can come over. I was thinking maybe this weekend I could take you and your mom to the zoo. Would you like that?"
EJ shook his head excitedly. "Mom, can we?"
"Sure," I agreed, with a smile.
I let EJ ride back to the condo with Edward. He stayed a few minutes more, while EJ told him every detail about his day at school. When he finally did leave, EJ seemed sad. I hated seeing him upset. I knew I needed to make this right, not only for Edward but for EJ too.
Edward and I agreed I would drop EJ off at school and he would pick him up after school and hang out with him for a little while, until I got off work. It seemed to work out well and EJ definitely enjoyed the extra time with Edward.
On Saturday, EJ was up bright and early, so we could get ready to go to the zoo. I knew Edward planned to take us over to his house after the zoo and I figured he'd want EJ to stay the night. So, I packed him a bag of clothes and his favorite book and stuffed animal, just in case.
Edward picked us up at nine in the morning and we drove to the zoo. Edward insisted on paying the admission cost and even for lunch. I told him he didn't have to. I didn't want him to think he needed to take care of me. But he insisted the zoo was his idea, so he was paying.
We walked around the park and looked at all the animals. EJ especially liked the elephants and the lions. They had a train there as well and EJ begged to ride on it. He really enjoyed the train ride through all the exhibits.
After we had gone through every exhibit and looked at all the animals, we went into the gift shop. Edward bought EJ a T-shirt, a couple stuffed animals, a new book all about elephants, a poster with lions on it, and a few little trinket toys to play with. I thought everyone else was bad about spoiling him. Edward was worse.
"Mommy, guess what?" EJ shouted as they walked out of the gift shop with their hands loaded with stuff. "Look what me and daddy got for you." He held out a stuffed monkey in his hands. I smiled and took it from his hands. "You always say I'm your monkey, so we got you a monkey." I hugged him and thanked him for the gift. I looked up at Edward mouthing the words thank you. He nodded his head and smiled.
Like I expected, Edward asked if we wanted to go back to his house and check it out. EJ was extremely thrilled to see his room. It turned out he didn't live very far from where we lived currently and it was still in the same school district. He pulled up in front of a decent sized house with a nice front yard. He helped EJ out and carried all of his stuff. We walked in and instantly I felt at home. It was decorated in warm, inviting colors. There was a huge kitchen, which I liked. Through the dining room was a nice sized backyard with a small fenced in pool. EJ noticed the swing set and sand box in the back yard almost immediately. He jumped up and down with excitement to try it out. But first Edward wanted to show him his room.
We walked down the hallway and Edward pointed out the bathroom and where his room was and the extra room, which I assumed would be mine if I chose to move in here with him. At the far end of the hall was EJ's room. On the outside of the door was EJ's name painted on it. EJ was smiling from ear to ear and jumping with anticipation. I didn't think he could handle the wait any longer. Edward and I were both laughing at him. Finally, the door swung open and EJ walked in, followed by me and Edward. EJ gasped as he looked around. He had a twin size bed with a dinosaur bedspread and sheets. There was a shelf full of books and board games. A toy box, full of toys, sat in the corner. One whole wall had a mural of a dinosaur scene painted on it. There was a closet full of new clothes. EJ was lost for words, which was a first for him.
"Do you like it?" Edward asked. He nodded his head as he continued to look around the room and take it all in. "My mom and my sister were here to help decorate, while my brother-in-law and I unpacked the moving truck. I told them how much you liked dinosaurs and they made it happen."
EJ turned around and hugged Edward tightly. "It's perfect, dad. I love it."
"I thought maybe if it's okay with your mom, you could stay tonight," Edward suggested.
"Can I, Mom?" he asked looking up at me with pleading eyes.
"Of course you can, baby. If you want to stay, you can."
After the excitement wore off a little, Edward ordered a pizza for dinner and made ice cream sundaes for dessert. We sat out in the living room and watched a movie, until EJ got tired. Edward carried him back to his bedroom and helped him get his pajamas on and read him a story before he fell asleep. I stayed out in the living room and waited. I just wanted to be sure he would be okay, before I left for the night.
After about twenty minutes, Edward walked back out into the living room and sat down next to me on the couch.
"He's asleep," he announced. "He's worried about you being all alone tonight. I assured him you would be okay and you had Alice there. I think he may have been a little scared all alone in the room."
"He's used to me being right there with him, when he sleeps."
"I'm sure he'll be fine," he assured.
"I know. I'm not saying you won't be able to take care of him. He just might wake up in the middle of the night and start crying. You should be aware of that," I warned.
"Okay," he accepted. "Thank you for this. It means a lot to me, that you're letting him stay."
"Yeah."
We were quiet for a few seconds. I knew I should probably leave, but still was not quite ready to leave him.
"So, you said your sister and your mom were in town. Did they not want to meet him?" I wondered.
"They do. Believe me, they do. I just suggested right now might not be the best time. He's still getting used to me being his dad. I don't want to overwhelm him with new people. Plus, I was worried how you would take it."
"I'm trying, Edward. This is hard for me to let go. He's all I have."
"I know," he reassured, rubbing my shoulder for comfort. "I'm grateful you're giving me a chance. I know it's hard and I know it's going to continue to be hard for all of us. But I'm willing to do whatever I have to do to make this work.
"I know you hate me for what I did to you. But I truly do feel bad about it. I wanted to find you ever since the minute I found out. But I was a chicken. I wasn't sure how you would take the news. I didn't know if you would want to be a father or if you would try to do what Jake did to me. I wish I knew then what I know now."
"It's hard to hate someone, when you love them. Even when I want to hate you, and I probably have every right to hate you, I can't." My eyes shot up to his. What was he saying? He stared deep into my eyes. He made me nervous to feel what I was feeling.
I looked away and sat up on the edge of the couch. "I should go. It's getting late and I don't have any reason to be here anymore, if he's asleep." I stood to my feet and walked towards the door. "I'll call in the morning. If he needs anything during the night you can call me. I'll have my phone next to me." I really didn't think I'd sleep at all anyway.
I grabbed my stuff and reached for the doorknob. Edward put his hand out and stopped the door from opening up.
"You don't have to go," he offered. I turned around to face him. My breathing began to pick up. "I don't want you to go." He slowly raised his eyes to meet mine. I was frozen in place.
He moved closer to me and brushed his lips across mine. It was odd and almost uncomfortable. I didn't know what he was trying to do. I pulled my head away, to look at him. He stepped back, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.
"We can't do this, Edward. It's not right," I pleaded.
"Bella, don't tell me you didn't feel a connection to me that night. I know I did to you. I'd never felt more alive than I did when I was with you. I was devastated when I woke up and you were gone. I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I searched for you, for years. I even knew about Jake being your ex-husband. To tell you the truth, I'm the one who made sure he got caught for what he was doing. I wanted him to pay for taking you away from me. If he hadn't have scared you and made you feel like you had no choice but to run, we could have been together. None of this would have happened."
"I'm not the same person I was then," I informed.
"To me, you are still the same person I fell in love with. I never got over you, Bella."
"What do you see when you look at me now?" I asked. "Because what I see is a thirty-one year old, divorced, single mom, who has nothing to offer anyone. Why would you want me? You're still young, Edward. You're not even twenty-five years old. You're extremely good looking. You could probably have anyone you want. Why would you want an old woman like me?"
"First of all, you aren't old, Bella. Second, I don't want anyone else. I haven't wanted anyone else for nearly six years. No one has ever been able to compare to you. I don't care how old or young either of us are. All I know is you are who I can't get over. And third, what I see when I look at you, is a woman who finally has something to live for and fight for. Which I admire greatly, because what she's fighting for is my son. I see a woman, who still cares about others and wants the best for them, even if sometimes what she thinks is the best, really isn't. But in her heart, she thinks she's doing the right thing. She's still the strongest and most determined person I've ever met and she keeps surprising me with how strong she truly is. She's still beautiful and will always be beautiful in my eyes, no matter how old she gets. And I want to be her king."
I was speechless. My mouth hung open in astonishment. I had relived those words a thousand times in my dreams. I couldn't believe he still remembered them after all this time.
"I love you, Bella. I want you to stay here with me. I want us to be a family; a real family. Please, Bella," he begged, cupping my face in his hands. "I can't bear loosing you again."
I looked up into his eyes and knew everything he was saying was the truth. My face was stained with tears. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down to me, pressing my lips to his. I kissed him hard and long. I missed kissing. I missed feeling like a woman. I missed feeling desired by a man. I missed him.
"Will you stay with me?" he asked, breaking the kiss and wiping my tears away. I nodded my head, but the fear of what would happen next, overwhelmed me.
He took my things out of my hand, placing them back on the chair next to the door. His fingers traced a line down my arm and took my hand in his. He led me back to his bedroom and locked the door behind us. I looked up at him nervously. He brushed the hair off my shoulder and leaned down to kiss my neck. I tilted my head to give him better access. I closed my eyes, reveling in the feeling. His lips were tender against my skin. His hot breath against my neck, sent chills down my spine.
He slowly lifted my shirt over my head and unsnapped my bra, letting both fall to the ground. His hands rubbed across my back and pulled me close to him.
"Edward," I breathed as he continued to kiss my neck and shoulders. He hummed in response. "I don't know if I can do this. I haven't in almost six years."
He stopped, pulling back and looked in my eyes with concern. "It's been six years? You mean the last time… was you and I? You haven't even… you know… on your own?"
"No," I replied bashfully. "I share a room with our son. It doesn't exactly allow for things like that." He smirked and chuckled under his breath.
"I don't think it's something you forget how to do, Bella." He leaned in close to my mouth and barely touched his lips to mine. "I'll be gentle. I'll take good care of you." He kissed me fully on the lips before picking me up in his arms and carrying me to the bed. He gently laid me on the bed and removed my shoes and pants. He removed his clothes before crawling up on the bed next to me.
I was trembling with fear. I wanted this, but I was so scared of messing it up. What if I wasn't able to have sex after all this time? What if we tried to be together and things didn't work out? Where would that leave EJ?
"Edward," I cried. He sighed, falling to the side of the bed. "Are we doing the right thing? What if EJ wakes up? What if he hears us?"
"Bella, we don't have to do anything you aren't ready for. I don't want you to feel scared. You're shaking and it's making me nervous."
"I want to, Edward. I really do. I just haven't done this in a long time and I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up. I screw everything up."
He leaned up on his elbow, looking down at me. "Just be here in the morning and you won't screw anything up." I laughed lightly. He brushed the hair away from my face and looked down at me seriously. "I love you, Bella. I always have. And I want to be with you for as long as you'll have me."
How could I not love him in return, after saying what he just did? I have always loved him, in my own way. It was just time to give in to my feelings for him. I leaned up on my elbow and grabbed his neck to kiss him. I brought him down on top of me and continued to kiss him. He smiled against my lips. I could feel his hands and lips all over my body, leaving trails of fire. I wanted him so badly.
He slowly inched his way between my legs, positioning himself perfectly. I wrapped my legs around him and grabbed his face with my hands. I kissed him long and hard, trying to let go of my fear and just enjoy what we were doing.
He broke the kiss suddenly and leaned over to the side of the bed. He opened the drawer and pulled out a condom.
"I think we should use one of these this time," he teased, playfully. I laughed as he opened the package and rolled it on. He fell forward over top of me and kissed me again. I felt him rub up against me and slowly begin making his way inside of me. I sucked in a shaky breath through my teeth. "Damn Bella, you're so tight. I'm going to hurt you. Maybe we shouldn't."
"No," I begged. "Please, Edward. I want to." He eased his way further in. I screamed as he slowly inched his way in. I had to cover my mouth with my hand. Again, Edward asked me if I wanted him to stop, but I shook my head no. He continued on, starting out a slow and steady pace. As soon as I got over the initial shock, I let go of my tension and tried to enjoy it. I wrapped my arms around his neck, bringing him down so I could kiss him. I arched my hips to feel him even deeper inside of me. My eyes rolled and I moaned loudly as the orgasm built. Edward laughed and shushed me. The only thing keeping me from screaming out in ecstasy was his lips against mine. I could hear him groaning into my mouth, as he got closer. I wanted to shout how great it felt. I'd forgotten how much I needed this. It felt like six years of built up tension was being released all at once. It was the most liberating feeling I'd ever felt. I laid there completely spent as he finished.
He rolled over on his back. We were both panting from exhaustion. Suddenly Edward began chuckling. I turned my head towards him, staring at him curiously.
"What are you laughing about?" I wondered.
"All this time, I questioned whether you were real or not. Sometimes, I wondered if I'd imagined it all." He turned to face me, brushing my cheek with his knuckles. "But this just proved to me finally, that I didn't imagine it. You are real and what we had that one night, was so much more than real. It was magic." I smiled at him and placed my hand on his cheek. He closed his eyes and leaned into my hand. His hand rested against my stomach and I eased my way closer to him. We laid wrapped in each other's arms, as we fell asleep.
A few hours later, I woke up and Edward wasn't in the bed. I rubbed my eyes, trying to see where he was. I leaned over and turned on the lamp. I crawled out of the bed, throwing on Edward's t-shirt and quietly walked out into the dark hallway. I glanced in both directions and spotted him at the end of the hallway, standing in the doorway of EJ's room. I walked down the hall towards him and rubbed my hand across his back. He sucked in a long breath and turned in my direction.
"What are you doing up?" I asked.
He shrugged his shoulders. I wanted to check on him and make sure he was okay. I got mesmerized by his breathing. It's so peaceful and innocent. I wanted to listen to him breathe and know he's real."
I wrapped my arms around his middle and leaned against his chest, looking in on EJ sleeping. "When he was a baby, I used to do the same thing. Listening to him breathe while he slept, was the most relaxing sound. I'd watch him for hours." I smiled at the memory. I looked up at Edward, who had the saddest look on his face. He almost looked like he wanted to cry.
I realized what a huge mistake I'd made. I should have kept my mouth shut. I took that experience away from him for five years. I lowered my head and loosened my grip around him. "I'm sorry."
He took in a deep breath and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, rubbing my arm. "Don't be. I want to know it all. Every memory, every experience you had with him, I want you to tell me. I don't want you to leave anything out." I nodded my head in agreement. "We should get some sleep. I imagine he'll be up in a few hours."
Edward shut the door and led us back down the hall to his room. We crawled back in bed and I rested my head against Edward's chest.
"Can I ask you something?" I wondered. He hummed in response.
"If I hadn't left that night, would you have stayed with me? Or would you have gone back to school?" I waited a few seconds for him to answer. I got the impression he was thinking it over.
He squeezed my arm gently. "I would have followed you anywhere, Bella."
"But you went back to school and finished, right?"
"Yeah, I did. You asked me to in the letter you left me. I always imagined once I finished college you would come back, somehow." He chuckled. "I was pretty naïve wasn't I?"
"So, if you finished college, then in a way, maybe what I did, by leaving you, was a good thing?" I wondered.
"I guess it depends on how you look at it," he answered. "I didn't really need college. I would have been fine without it. I might not have the career I do now, but I would have been fine as long as I got to be with you. I could have protected you from Jake. I could have given you the life you deserve. I could have been the father EJ deserved to have from the very beginning. But everything happens for a reason, right? Maybe there was a really good reason for all of this happening. I'm not sure what, but there's got to be something."
"Maybe it'll just make all of us stronger and we won't take things for granted," I theorized.
"Maybe," he replied. I didn't say anymore. I didn't want to upset him more and I was starting to think I was making things worse.
In the morning, I was curled up on the edge of the bed. I felt Edward roll over and moan in my ear. He wrapped an arm around my stomach, pulling me closer to him. "This is what I wanted to wake up to all those years ago. I want to wake up with you in my arms every day, for the rest of my life." I smiled at his words. He left small, tender kisses all along my neck and shoulders. It felt so good. I didn't want him to stop.
"Mommy, Mommy, Mommy," EJ shouted, bursting through the door. I pulled the covers up around me. Edward pulled away from me, pulling the covers around him too.
"What's wrong, Baby?" I asked, breathlessly. I was sure my face was bright red from embarrassment.
He jumped on the bed with us. "I was scared. I couldn't find anyone. I didn't know where I was."
"It's okay, Buddy," Edward assured, rubbing his back. "Remember, you stayed over at my house last night? You got to sleep in your own room."
"Did you spend the night too, Mommy? Why are you in dad's bed?" he asked. I glanced over at Edward, nervously. He had a sheepish grin on his face.
"Why don't I get you some breakfast?" Edward suggested, changing the subject.
EJ smiled and jumped off the bed. He headed for the door, but stopped right at the entrance and turned around.
"Are you coming, Daddy?" he asked. I watched Edward's face light up with pride.
"I'll be right there," he assured. EJ left the room, skipping down the hallway.
We both let out a relieved sigh. Edward turned in my direction. "I'll take care of breakfast. You can sleep in as long as you like." He leaned in giving me a sweet kiss on the lips.
"He likes pancakes," I informed.
"Pancakes I can do," he assured, with a chuckle. I grabbed his face and kissed him again. He crawled out of bed and threw on a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt. He left the room, closing the door behind him. After a few minutes, I could hear them laughing and making a lot of noise, as they made pancakes together. The sounds of them spending time together, made me smile. Edward had only known EJ for a few weeks and already I could see just how wonderful of a father he is. I should have given him the chance to be a father. It was time for me to give that back to him and let him be who he was meant to be.
I got out of bed and put on my clothes from yesterday. I walked out into the kitchen and saw Edward standing over the stove cooking, while EJ sat at the bar eating a plate full of pancakes.
"You were supposed to be sleeping in," Edward reminded, once he noticed me come in the kitchen.
I walked straight over to him, without hesitation and wrapped my arms around his neck. I leaned up on my tippy toes and kissed him hard and full.
"What was that for?" he asked when the kiss broke.
"I love you," I admitted, sincerely. "And if you still want us to move in here with you, I'd really like to."
His lips grew into a wide smile. He wrapped his arms around me, picking me up and swinging me around, excitedly. I giggled at his excitement.
"This is the best day of my life," he expressed. "I love you, so much, Bella. I promise I'll always love you and take care of both you and EJ."
"I know you will," I assured.
"Did you hear that, EJ?" Edward asked. "You and your mom are going to live here permanently. Now, we can always be together." Edward walked over to EJ and picked him up off the stool and swung him around too. EJ was squealing with joy. I couldn't help but giggle at both of them. They were both going to benefit from this.
Later in the week we moved all of our stuff into the house with Edward. We'd been there every night since I agreed to live with him, and each day it seemed as if Edward's and my relationship only got stronger, which, in return, made EJ and Edward's, relationship stronger. Everything seemed to be working out perfectly.
Alice was sad to see us go, but she knew it was for the best and was happy for all of us. We got together as much as we could and she constantly reminded me how I've never looked happier. I was happy. I know Edwards' and my relationship wasn't perfect. He still had a lot of resentment towards me and I carried a ton of guilt on my shoulders. But we were working on it and trying to get past all that happened and focused on making things right, for EJ's sake.
Edward had successfully started up his engineer business and was beginning to pull in a lot of work. He still made a point to be there for EJ every day after school, until I got off and to be there for him at bedtime. It became their nightly ritual to read a book together. Sometimes I'd join in and listen to the story being told. But most nights, I let them have that time. I'd had that time with EJ since he was born and I needed to let Edward have it too.
I hid my moving in with Edward from my mother as long as I could. I just had a really bad feeling she wouldn't be thrilled with my decision. Unfortunately, EJ let it slip one day, while he visited them, how we had moved in with his dad. My mom was concerned at first. She assumed Edward was some random guy I had met and moved in with suddenly. She thought I was taking things too fast and would only end up hurting EJ in the long run, especially since he was calling him dad already.
Once I sat my mom down and explained everything to her, she was a little more relaxed about what we did, but she still wanted to meet him and give him her approval.
She invited us over for Thanksgiving dinner. Edward was so nervous meeting them. I had told him what my mom was like and how she can be a little hard to read at times. Although for Edward, it was easy. He knew exactly what to say and how to behave to get her to like him. Phil really liked him too and we stayed an extra two hours longer than we had planned, so they could talk football.
I walked into the kitchen to help my mom with the dishes while they talked.
"So, what do you think?" I asked. "Are you still concerned for me and EJ's wellbeing?"
"Oh, Bella," she gasped. "He's exactly what I always wanted for you. I thought Jake was going to good for you and he'd love you the way you deserved to be loved. But Edward's love for you can't even compare to what I saw from Jake. I can see how much he loves you and EJ. I can see how perfect the two of you are for each other."
"You aren't concerned about him being younger than me?" I asked.
"Bella, have you looked at Phil?" She asked sarcastically. "He's quite a bit younger than me. There's a bigger age difference between me and Phil than there is between you and Edward. Age doesn't mean anything when it comes to matters of the heart. I can see how much you love him. And I truly couldn't be happier for you." I let out a relieved sigh and hugged her. I was glad my mom like him and was so accepting of my relationship with him.
Everything was going as perfectly as it possibly could. Until Edward dropped a bomb, and told me he'd invited his family down for Christmas. I almost broke a plate when he told me. I still hadn't met any of his family. I was so scared of what they may think of me. What if they didn't like me or want Edward to be with me, because I was older than him? It was always something I thought about in the back of my mind. I always worried what people would think when they saw us together. I was sure it was so obvious when people looked at us. It never seemed to bother Edward, though. He didn't care about the age difference and never seemed to even notice there was one.
I was in the kitchen, on Christmas Eve, preparing the dinner. Edward was supposed to pick up his family from the airport in about an hour. I was a ball of nerves. I couldn't stop shaking. My stomach was queasy. I felt like any minute I was going to puke or pass-out.
I was busy putting a pie together, when I suddenly smelled smoke. I turned around and saw smoke rising from the oven. I rushed over, remembering the cookies I put in, before I started working on the pie. I opened the oven door and saw black, crumpled up sugar cookies on the tray.
"Damn it," I shouted. I was so mad at myself for burning them. Now not only did the house smell like smoke, but I was going to have to start all over.
I could hear Edward chuckling at the entrance of the kitchen. I turned around and glared at him. I turned back to the cookies and scraped them into the sink. Edward walked over to me and slipped his arms around my waist, kissing my neck.
"Why are you so nervous?" he asked, against my skin.
"You're family is going to hate me. Their son moved across the country to be with the girl who kept their grandchild and nephew away from them."
"They aren't going to hate you, Bella. I promise. They'll love you, because I love you. And they're going to adore EJ. I can't even tell you how excited they are to meet both of you."
I sighed, not really buying his reassurance.
He kissed my cheek and let go of me. "Do you need any help, before I have to go get them?" he asked.
"I need to make up another batch of sugar cookies. EJ needs something to decorate. It's tradition."
"Point me to the recipe and I'll make it happen." He rolled up his sleeves and went to the sink to wash his hands.
He helped me in the kitchen for the rest of the day, before he had to go to the airport. When he left, I rushed around the house, making sure everything was in order. I had a prime rib roast in the oven. There was steamed red potatoes with butter and chives, a green bean casserole, along with homemade macaroni and cheese and dinner rolls. I'd also made an apple pie and Edward made the sugar cookies. I had a red wine chilling in the freezer. I just hoped none of them were vegetarian. I hadn't really thought to ask Edward. Although, he did know what I was making and he didn't say anything about it being wrong.
I peaked in on EJ who was playing with his Legos. I quickly ran to the bathroom to take a shower and freshen up.
Not only was Edward's family coming tonight, but I'd also invited my Mom and Phil, as well as Alice and Jasper. They weren't supposed to get here until later tonight for dinner though. I had to meet his family alone.
After my shower, I dressed in a dark blue, spaghetti strap, short dress, with a flower pattern at the bottom in black beading. I clipped up the sides of my hair, to keep it out of my face and let the rest hang down my back. I put on a touch of mascara and lip gloss, calling it good. I walked back out and checked in on EJ one more time. I told him our guests were going to be here in just a few minutes, so he needed to pick up his toys. I could tell he was nervous too. Probably my nervousness was making him have those same feelings too.
"Mommy," he began, climbing up on the stool in the kitchen. "Are they going to like me?"
"Why wouldn't like you, Baby? Everyone likes you," I responded. "You don't need to worry about it, okay. Your dad has told them all about you and they can't wait to meet you. I'm sure they're going to be so excited to play with you." He smiled, accepting my answer. I knew they would love him. Everyone always loved him. On the other hand, I might be a different story. I had a really bad feeling about all of this. I worried they were going to be mad at me, as much as Edward was when he first found out. They have known since Edward found out and had time to adjust to it, but I still have never talked to any of them and I'm sure they had things they'd like to say to me.
I patted EJ's arm and smiled at him reassuringly.
"Bella," Edward called. I felt my stomach turn. I knew I was probably as white as a ghost.
I looked down at EJ, who had somehow jumped off the stool and ran over to me, hiding behind my leg.
"It's going to be okay," I reassured. I rubbed his back and led him out into the living room. We reached the living room just as everyone was walking in. Edward had the biggest grin on his face, as he walked over to me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.
"Bella, this is my mom, Esme." He pointed to the woman with long chestnut colored hair. She was petite and had a heart shaped face with a pleasant smile. "And that's my dad, Carlisle." I turned to the man standing next to Esme. He was tall and very handsome. His hair was bright blonde and he had piercing blue eyes. "And that is my sister, Rosalie and her husband, Emmett." I looked to the other couple standing in our doorway. Rosalie was gorgeous. I'd never seen anyone as beautiful as she was. She had long wavy blonde hair with the same shape face as Esme. Her eyes were bright blue with a hint of almost violet. Emmett was tall and well built. He had dark hair with a slight curl to it. His eyes were dark and when he smiled, he had a single dimple on his cheek.
"Everyone this is Bella and EJ," Edward introduced.
"It's nice to finally meet all of you," I greeted. I was trying really hard to speak without my voice shaking, but I failed.
"Oh," Esme gasped. She walked across the room and wrapped me in her arms. "I'm so happy to finally meet you, Bella. I've been waiting for this day for so long." She sort of shocked me with her excitement. She pulled away, holding me at arm's length and looking me over. "Edward described you perfectly. I can see why he loves you so." I glanced up at Edward, who had a bashful smile on his face.
"And you, mister EJ," she said, leaning down to his level. He cowered behind my skirt a little more. "I've been so excited to meet my only grandson. I hope you like presents, because your grandpa and I brought you tons of gifts for Christmas. Maybe we can let you open one up tonight, before you go to bed." EJ inched his way out from around me and smiled. "Could I have a hug?" He looked up at me, making sure it was okay. I smiled and nodded my head. He came out from behind me and put his hands out to her. She hugged him tightly and rubbed his head. I could see tears of joy forming in her eyes.
Carlisle walked over to them and looked him over. "He looks exactly like you, Son," Carlisle observed.
"I know he does. You'll be shocked at how many similarities there are between us, after you spend some time with him," Edward revealed.
"Something sure smells good," Emmett announced. "What are you cooking, Bella?"
"It's a prime rib roast."
"Mmm," he expressed, rubbing his belly. "When do we eat?"
Rose slapped his arm. "Emmett, can't you ever think of anything but your stomach? We're in the middle of an emotional and heartfelt moment. Don't you even want to meet your nephew?"
"Ah, Rose, I do. But I'm starving. It was a long flight," he complained. I giggled at his statement. Edward rubbed my back and laughed lightly, himself.
The afternoon went rather well. Edward showed them to their rooms and let them get their stuff put away. When they were done they all gathered in the living room and talked amongst themselves and watched EJ play. Esme couldn't stay away from EJ. She sat on the floor and played his game with him. She had a permanent smile on her face.
I busied myself in the kitchen, preparing the dinner. There wasn't a lot I needed to do, but I felt like I needed to stay away and give them time alone.
After a while, Alice and Jasper showed up, making things a little easier on me. It was nice having a familiar face in the house. My mom and Phil showed up right before we were to begin eating.
Everyone sat down at the table and chatted pleasantly. It all seemed to be going really well. I was surprised how nice everyone was being and how well they seemed to be getting along. Throughout the dinner, Edward would periodically rub my back or massage my shoulder. I'd pat his knee just so he knew I was okay. I knew he was worried about me being nervous. I was nervous and most likely everyone could tell, since I hadn't eaten much or said a lot during the conversations.
After dinner everyone congregated in the living room again. They all expressed how wonderful the food was. I was so thankful it all turned out nice. The burnt cookies from this morning, made me worry about the rest of the meal.
I carried out a platter of cookies and the bags with the decorating icing for EJ to decorate at the coffee table. Emmett and Edward kneeled down on the floor to decorate cookies with him. After a while, even Alice and Jasper joined in on decorating the cookies.
I went to the kitchen to wash the dishes. I was just about done, loading the dishwasher and washing down the counters when Esme walked in.
"You made a wonderful dinner, Bella," she expressed.
"Thank you. I'm glad everyone enjoyed it."
"I just wanted to tell you how happy I am to see you and Edward together taking care of EJ. I've never seen Edward so happy."
"I was worried you wouldn't like me because of what I did and because I'm quite a bit older than Edward."
"Oh, honey," she expressed. "Age doesn't mean anything when it comes to matters of the heart." It was funny how my mom and Esme were alike. My mom had said the exact same thing to me only a month ago. "I know how much he loves you. He's always loved you. It took us a long time to get through to him. He was really messed up when he came back home. He went back to school and completely lost himself there. He very rarely talked to anyone or did anything. He's been gone emotionally for a long time.
"Then out of the blue he calls us up and tells us he found you and he has a son. For the first time in a long time, he was back. He was happy and exuberant again. If you make him happy, then I don't care how old you are. He obviously doesn't care about your age difference. As for what happened in the past, I think you're both getting over and dealing with what happened and moving forward. I respect that. I think you both are doing a really great thing, and I'm happy for both of you." She smiled, hugging me tightly. I had tears in my eyes from her words. I had no idea she would be so understanding and welcoming.
"Come on. I'd like you to join us in the living room. We have some gifts for EJ and we'd like you to be there when he opens them." She put her arm through mine and guided me out to the living room. Edward smiled when he saw me walking out with his mom. I walked over to him and sat down on the chair next to him.
He grabbed my hand and kissed the back of it. "Is everything okay?" He asked.
I smiled and nodded my head. "Everything is perfect."
"Good. I'm glad to hear that. I'm hoping to make things even more perfect here in a few minutes."
"What do you mean?" I asked confused by what he said.
"Alright EJ," Esme interrupted. "I think it's time for some presents, don't you?" EJ jumped up and down. "Edward, could you come help me carry some things from the bedroom?" He got up and followed her back to the bedroom. A few minutes later they both came out, carrying an arm load of presents. EJ's eyes were huge with excitement.
Esme passed presents around the room for each person. She even had something for my mom and Phil, as well as Alice and Jasper, even though she didn't know them until today. Edward handed me a medium sized square box and sat down on the arm of the chair next to me.
"So, back home we always open one gift on Christmas Eve," Esme explained. "We each take turns opening our gift, while everyone else watches. If it's okay with you, Bella, I'd like to continue that tradition here."
"Of course," I agreed. "It sounds like a great idea."
EJ went first and got a brand new train set. It was huge and he wanted to put it together immediately. Edward said he needed to wait until everyone was done. He was upset about it, but he listened. Each and every person took their turn opening a gift from Esme and Carlisle.
I was the last to go. I didn't like being the center of attention and I sort of hoped maybe they'd forget about me and I could just open the present later on when no one was watching. However, Edward made sure to remind me to open it, while everyone watched. I was sure I was as red as a tomato, while everyone stared at me.
I carefully ripped off the wrapping and opened up the box, only to find another, smaller box inside. I looked up, confused by what I saw.
"Just keep opening them," Edward demanded. I smiled, and took the next box out. I un-wrapped the next box, and, again saw another box inside. Emmett laughed, boisterously. I was so embarrassed.
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Keep going. You'll get to the gift eventually," Edward urged.
"Can I help, Mommy?" EJ asked.
"Sure," I accepted. He came over and helped me take off the next layer of wrapping. EJ laughed when he saw another box inside.
"Okay EJ, your mom needs to open this box on her own," Edward ordered. EJ sat down next to me, watching the box with amazement. I think he wanted to know what was inside more than I did.
Once again, I ripped off the wrapping and opened the lid to the box, seeing a small black jewelry box inside. I gasped when I saw it. My hand instantly came up to my mouth, covering it to cover my sobs. I couldn't take my eyes off the box. I hadn't even opened it yet and I was already crying. I slowly opened up the box and saw a beautiful diamond ring inside. It was a square cut diamond with an antiqued band. There were small inset diamonds all along the edge of the band as well. It was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I was afraid to touch it.
"Bella," Edward began, getting my attention. I looked up, noticing through my blurred vision he was kneeled in front of me. He took the box from my hand and pulled the ring out. I was shaking so hard. "I know we've been through a lot in the past few months. But I know I'm never going to love anyone as much as I love you. Will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?"
I couldn't talk. Tears were streaming down my face. All I could do was nod my head. He smiled, taking my shaky hand in his and slipped the ring on my finger. I let out a long, cleansing breath. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. I had forgotten there were people watching us, until I heard everyone clapping and cheering. Edward didn't seem to notice them either. He looked me deep in the eyes and wiped the tears off my cheeks. "I love you, Bella. I always will." He kissed me on the lips and held me close to him.
"I love you, too," I cried.
Everyone was overjoyed with our engagement. My mom and Alice were already talking wedding plans. Edward explained that the ring was his great grandmothers and his mom was holding on to it for him, until he found the right girl to marry. She had the idea of wrapping it up in numerous boxes, just to throw me off and make it more exciting.
I think for the rest of the night I continued to shake. I couldn't believe he'd asked me to marry him. We had never really talked about getting married. We were, for the most part, comfortable with the way we were now. We already lived like a family. But Edward said he wanted it to be official and complete.
That night, while we lied in bed together, I kept staring up at the ring. I loved the way it felt on my finger. I loved how it caught the light and sparkled.
"This is the best day of my life," I expressed.
He held me close to him and smiled. "This is definitely one of my best days too."
"Just one?" I teased. "How many best days do you have?"
"I'll tell you someday."
I scoffed, slapping him playfully on the chest. "Someday?"
He laughed. "Yes, someday." I sighed, perturbed by his response. "On our wedding day, I'll tell you what they are. I promise."
"I'm holding you to that," I warned.
He chuckled, pulling me closer to him. We didn't say anything more on the subject. I was curious, but I didn't want to push him into telling me anything.
The following months were spent planning for the wedding. I didn't want anything big. I wanted it to be simple and elegant. I didn't want a lot of guests or too much frills. To me this was my first and only true wedding, but I still didn't want it to be extravagant. The only people, who mattered, were Edward, EJ, and me. Those were the only ones who truly needed to be there.
On the morning of August thirteenth, I was awoken by Alice. She was in charge of getting me ready for the wedding. I took a shower and wrapped up in a bathrobe. Alice worked on my hair and make-up. When she was done, I looked at myself in the mirror. She had pulled my hair back along the sides, pinning it up in loose curls. She pinned two orchids along one side of my head. The make-up was sheer and highlighted my natural tones. I was amazed at how she transformed me. She truly was an artist, even at makeup and hair, she did amazing work.
"Thank you, Alice," I expressed, with tears in my eyes.
"No crying, Bella. I don't want you ruining what I just did." I took a deep breath, and waved my face with my hands, to prevent from crying.
She helped me slip on my dress, which was a soft chiffon, ivory, gown, with rhinestone spaghetti straps. It was slim and elegant with a light drape cutaway at the front, making it flow. I didn't want a big ballroom gown, especially since we were having a beach wedding. I put on my flip flops, just for the drive to the beach. I was planning on going barefoot once we got there.
Alice handed me my orchid bouquet and we walked out to the car. I called Edward, just to check in on how things were going. He said he was ready and so was EJ. They were waiting down on the beach and greeting all the guests.
Edward and I had rented a beach house to have the reception in and in the back on the beach was where we would get married. Everything still seemed so surreal. How did I get so lucky to go from nothing, to having everything I could have ever dreamed of? I had the most wonderful and forgiving man, who loved me despite everything I'd put him through and I had the most beautiful little boy. Everything was perfect.
Esme and Rosalie met us in the front of the house, beaming with joy when they saw me get out of the car. They both gave me hugs and congratulated me. I loved Edward's family. All of them were so kind and accepting of me into the family. It felt good to have them in my life.
"Rose, I wanted to tell you something. I should have told you a long time ago," I explained.
"What, Bella."
"I wanted to tell you, thank you. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't have left my ex-husband and I would have never met Edward."
"What are you talking about?" She asked confused by what I said.
"The night before I left my husband, I called Dr. Rose and she told me I needed to leave my husband. At first, I didn't think I could go through with it. But you gave me the courage to do it, and the next night I left and that's when I met Edward."
She stared at me, with bulging eyes. "He told you I was Dr. Rose?" she asked. "I'm going to kill him. He knows better than to tell anyone. Who else knows? Who have you told?"
I laughed. "Rose, I've never told anyone. And I won't, either. I just wanted you to know how thankful I am, you took my call that night. I'm sure you don't even remember the call. I just wanted you to know, even though you aren't a real doctor, you gave me the greatest advice anyone could have possibly given me."
She smiled, and wrapped her arms around my shoulders. "I'm so glad you're joining this family. I was hesitant of the idea at first. But I know my brother loves you and I can't imagine anyone else better for him. And to know I had a little part in you two meeting, makes it even sweeter."
We both giggled at the thought as we walked up the steps to the house. Within minutes, I was walking out to the beach to marry the man of my dreams. It was a perfect day. There was a cool breeze blowing and the sun was in a perfect position so it didn't blind any of our guests. I looked out into the crowd, who were all seated in white chairs lined up along the beach. I spotted Edward at the end of the aisle with EJ in his arms. I imagined EJ couldn't see, so Edward picked him up so he could. I walked down the aisle of white and blush rose petals, meeting Edward and EJ at the end.
Edward couldn't take his eyes off of me. His face was glowing and he kept smiling, even when he was trying to be serious when saying his vows.
"Isabella Swan, do you take Edward to be you husband, from this day forward?" the officiate asked.
"I do," I whispered. I had every intention of saying it louder, but it came out as nothing more than a whisper.
"Edward Cullen, do you take Isabella to be your wife, from this day forward?"
"I absolutely do," he boisterously answered. All of our family and friends, laughed.
"By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife." Edward turned his head toward the officiate, waiting for him to say the next words. The officiate chuckled. "You may now kiss your bride." Edward turned back to me. He took my face in his hands and pressed his lips to mine. For some reason, this kiss seemed magical. It was the beginning of something amazing and something real. It was home.
At the reception, everyone congratulated us and told us how cute we were and how happy they were for us. It was basically the same thing over and over. All I really wanted was to be alone with Edward and EJ.
Finally, our photographer took us away for some photos. We walked back out on the beach and took a few shots of just me and Edward, then some of me and EJ. He took some adorable pictures of EJ with Edward. And finally he took some of all three of us together. Those were the best ones in my opinion. EJ, of course, hammed it up for camera. He even had our photographer laughing.
After he was done, we stayed on the beach for a little while longer, letting EJ play in the water.
"This is the best day of my life," I expressed.
"I think I've heard you say that a few times," he teased.
"I probably have. But I do remember someone telling me he was going to tell me his favorite days today," I reminded.
"I did say that, didn't I?"
"Yes, you did, Mr. Cullen. So, spill it," I ordered.
"Well, I have five best days, which are all equally important. The first, being the day I met you. The second was the first day I spent with EJ and he called me dad. The third was the day you agreed to move in with me and you said you loved me. The forth, of course, was the day you agreed to marry me. And the number one best day of my entire life, is this day right here. The day you became my wife and I got everything I always wanted. I have the most beautiful woman in the entire world and I have my son. What more could I ever ask for?"
I smiled, and stood up on my tippy-toes to give him a kiss. "I bet I could make this day even better," I challenged.
"I doubt that. Why try to add more when this day has already been perfect?" he countered.
"I think I could."
He laughed. "Okay, Mrs. Cullen, how are you going to make this day even better?"
I smiled, and raised my eyebrow at him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down so my lips were at his ear. "I'm pregnant," I whispered.
He pulled away suddenly, staring at me with wide eyes. His lips slowly raised into a pleasing smile. He chuckled, picking me up in his arms and swinging me around.
"Really," he asked, breathlessly. "We're going to have another baby?" I nodded my head excitedly.
He cupped my face with his hands. "I love you, so much, Bella."
"I love you, too." He slowly leaned in and kissed my lips.
"Mom, Dad, come see what I can do," EJ called. We broke the kiss and looked out onto the beach to watch EJ doing cartwheels in the sand.
It was the ending of a perfect day, and just the beginning of a perfect life together.
The End
As I said at the beginning of this story I wrote this for cherieblossum. She's recently began writing a multi-chapter story of her own called 1 800 Sparkle Stick. It's one of the funniest stories I've ever read. I just wanted to give her a shout-out so if anyone is interested in reading her story they can look it up. Check it out!
