-alarm rings-

Yuki: zzzzzz

Zero: -yawn-

-Kitaisuru ni Gaara turns off alarm-

Kitaisuru ni Gaara: WAKE THE HELL UP!

Yuki:AHH!

Zero: -.-

Yuki: Disclaimer? OK LETS DO IT ZERO!

Zero: -.-

Yuki: -.-

Kitaisuru ni Gaara: I do not own Vampire Knights or Harry Potter

Yuki: The Awesome Matsuri Hino and J.K. Rowling do!


Yuki and Zero waited outside the door on their schedules which had said; defense against the dark arts. They didn't speak much each in their own world thinking about the Sorting Hat. Because it had also whispered a little more in their ears than listed afore, not a lot, just enough to send the cogs in their brains whirling a thousand miles and hour. A sharp bell rang and they slipped in sitting side by side near the back along with Harry and Hermione, and Ron.

The lady known as Umbridge entered the class room in a hot pink cardigan with a black bow in her hair.

"Well, good afternoon!" she greeted when everyone stopped staring at the Zero and Yuki, including herself. A few people mumbled, "Good afternoon," in reply. Yuki smiled brightly while on the inside severely p-oed. Zero rolled his eyes and was on the cusp of a glare. Her voice really grated on his nerves.

"Tut, tut." Umbridge said in a falsely sweet voice that made Harry want to gag. "That won't do," she added, "Now will it? I would like you to reply 'Good afternoon, Professor Umbridge'." Zero gave Yuki the look 'is she for real, because if she is she is from hell', look. Yuki didn't even bother to scold him for using that eye movement.

"One more time please. Good afternoon class!" The toad lady finished to have everyone reply, except Zero. He was too annoyed with affairs in general for that.

"There now," Umbridge said even more sweetly making Zero roll his eyes again.

"That wasn't too difficult was it? Wands away and quills out, please." The 'Zero and Yuki looked at each other remembering that Kurosu had only intended for Zero to come. He had a wand at least he thought it was a wand and the school supplies. But Yuki was a little sunk.

Zero took out a couple quills and two ink pots passing one of each to Yuki. Yuki tossed an experimental shy glance around the room and noticed people looked glum. Yuki understood, as a flash back of math rang through her brain. Umbridge took out a wand shorter than Yuki. That being a favorite expression of Zero's meant it was tiny. Writing appeared on the board clearly saying;

Defense Against the Dark Arts

A return to basic principles

"Well now, your teaching in this subjects has been rather disrupted and fragmented, hasn't it?" stated Professor Umbridge, turning to face the class with her hands clasped neatly in front of her.

"The constant changing of teachers, many of whom do not seem to have followed and Ministry-approved curriculum has unfortunately resulted in your being far below the standard we would expect to see in your OW.L. year." Yuki winced slightly hoping that she could worm a few tips out of this,

"You will be pleased to know, however these problems are now too rectified. We will be following a carefully structured, theory-centered, Ministry-approved course of defensive magic this year. Copy down the following, please." Hermione felt an inkling of understanding in her brilliant brain.

Umbridge had rapped the black board again the text appearing.

Course Aims:

1. Understand the principles underlying defensive magic.

2. Learning to recognize situations in which defensive magic can legally be used

3. Placing the use of defensive magic in a context for practical use

"Has everybody got a cop of Defensive Magical Theory By Wilber Slinkhard?" There was a dull murmur of assent through out the room. Zero checked his bag and nodded, but Yuki didn't/ "I think we'll try that again," Said Umbridge earning herself a 'What the hell?' look from Zero. She obviously ignored him and continued.

"When I ask you a question, I should like you to reply 'Yes Professor Umbridge,' or 'No Professor Umbridge.' So, has everyone got a copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?"

"Yes, Professor Umbridge," rang through the room. But a lone 'No Professor Umbridge was in the midst of the chorus.' She ignored Yuki and continued on.

"Good," The toad said. "I should like you to turn to page five and read chapter one, 'Basics for Beginners.' There will be no need to talk."

Zero read his book jotting down the more important parts down with his quill, not wanting to give Yuki an excuse for not studying.

Yuki however looked up and saw Ron staring at him; she shot him a questioning glance. Ron did some moving his eyes around really fast thing. Yuki followed the basic direction of his eyes and saw Hermione with her hand in the air. She only recognized her because she shared a dorm with her. She had her hand high in the air with a look of strained patience on her face. She was staring in the direction of Umbridge who was thoroughly ignoring her. Zero looked up to find Yuki staring in that direction and then joined. They both were curious at what she was up too.

A person sitting near them soon joined in the staring contest, along with a lot of the class.

"Did you want to ask something about the chapter, dear?" Umbridge asked the brunette she added dear as though it almost strained her.

"Not about the chapter, no," said the brunette calmly.

"Well, we're reading just now," Umbridge said, with a smile that showed off her small pointy teeth. The Zero prevented his laughter from being heard. It was quite clear to him that no one was reading.

"I have a query about your course aims." Said the brunette who looked a bit tried.

Umbridge raised her eyebrows.

"And your name is--?"

"Hermione Granger," said the brunette.

"Well, Miss Granger, I think the course aims are perfectly clear if you read them through carefully," said Umbridge. Her voice once again sickly sweet.

"Well, I don't," said Hermione bluntly.

They noticed that the rest of the class turned there heads to frown at the three course aims.

"Using defensive spells?" Umbridge repeated with a little laugh. That little laugh earned her an eye narrowing from Hinata. "Why I can't imagine a situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class?"

"We're not going to use magic?" Ron ejaculated loudly.

"Students raise there hands when they wish to speak in my class, MR.--"

"Weasley," said Ron, thrusting his hand in the air at a height to rival Hermione's earlier one.

What are they playing at? Zero thought glaring at the Maggoty Haggis.

Umbridge smiled widely she turned her back on him. Harry and Hermione raised there hands, Umbridge's pouchy eyes lingering on Harry in a way the person sitting beside Zero and Yuki didn't like.

"Yes, Miss Granger? You wanted to ask something else?"

"Yes," said Hermione. "Surely the whole point of Defense Against the Dark Arts is to practice defensive spells?

"Are you a Ministry-trained educational expert, Miss Granger?" Asked Umbridge again in a false sweet way. Zero found a sudden longing for blood, then not, he figured it'd taste too much like fake syrup for his taste

"No but-"

"Well then, I'm afraid you are not qualified to decide what the 'whole point' of any class is. Wizards much older and cleverer than you have devised our new program of study. You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way--"

"What use is that?" said Harry loudly. "If we're going to be attacked it won't be in a--"

"Hand, Mr. Potter!" Sang Umbridge.

Harry thrust his fist in the air. Umbridge promptly turned away from him again, but now several other people had their hands up too.

"And your name is?" Umbridge asked a black boy.

"Dean Thomas."

"Well, MR. Thomas?"

"Well it's like Harry said, isn't it?" said Dean. "If we're going to be attacked it won't be risk-free--"

"I repeat," said the awful toad, smiling in a fashion that made Harry's blood boil.

"Do you expect to be attacked during my classes?"

"No, but--"

Umbridge talked over him.

"I do not wish to criticize the way things have been run in this school," toady said with an unconvincing smile across her face.'

"But you have been exposed to some very irresponsible wizards in this class, very irresponsible indeed. Not to mention," she gave a nasty little laugh that made Neji flex his fists.

"Extremely dangerous half-breeds."

"If you mean Professor Lupin," piped up Dean angrily, "he was the best we ever--"

"Hand, Mr. Thomas! AS I was saying—you have been introduced to spells that have complex, inappropriate to your age group, and potentially lethal. You have been frightened into believing that you are likely to meet Dark attacks every other day--"

"No we haven't," Hermione said, "we just--"

"Your hand is not up, Miss Granger!"

Hermione put up her hand, Umbridge turned away from her.

"It is my understanding that my predecessor not only performed illegal curses in front of you, he actually performed them on you.--"

"Well he turned out to be a maniac, didn't he?" said Dean hotly. "Mind you, we still learned loads--"'

"Your hand is not up, Mr. Thomas!" trilled Umbridge.

"Now it is the view of the Ministry that a theoretical knowledge will be sufficient to get you through your examination, which after all is what school is all about. And your name is?" she added staring at an Indian looking girl.

"Parvarti Patil, isn't there a practical bit in our Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.? Aren't we supposed to show we can actually do the counter curses and things?"

"AS long s you have studied the theory hard enough, there is no reason why you should not be able to perform the spells under carefully controlled examination conditions." Said Froggy dismissively.

"Without ever practicing them before?" said Parvarti incredulously.

"Are you telling us that the first time we'll get to do the spells will be during our exam?"

That's horrible, this system is whacked, Zero thought glaring at Toad. Yuki shamelessly thought along the lines of that, knowing she'd feel semi-guilty later.

"I repeat, as long as you have studied the theory hard enough--"

"And what good's the theory going to be in the real world?" said Harry loudly, his fist in the air again.

Toad-face looked up.

"This is school, Mr. Potter, not the real world," she said softly.

"It won't always be," Some random person interjected raising their hand.

"So we're not supposed to be prepared for what's waiting out there?"

"There is nothing waiting out here, Mr. Potter."

"Oh yeah?" said Harry you could tell he was pissed.

"Who do you imagine wants to attack children like yourselves?"

"Hmm let me think, Lord Voldemort?" Ron gasped, a girl with brown hair uttered a little scream; Neville fell off his stool. Umbridge did not flinch; she looked grimly satisfied and bored.

"Ten points from Gryffindor Mr. Potter"

The classroom was silent. Everyone was staring at Harry, and Umbridge.

"Now let me make a few things quite plain."

Umbridge stood up and leaned towards them her stubby fingers splayed across the desk in a manner that reminded the authoress of an angry Tsunade... (she's in Naruto only resemblance I can think of)

"You have been told that a certain Dark wizard has returned from the dead--"

"He wasn't dead," Harry said angrily," But he is back."

"Shut up, Mr. Potter, You little liar."

"But I'm not!" Harry defended himself.

"Detention Mr. Potter!" Toadsie said triumphantly.

"Tomorrow evening 5 o' clock my office. I repeat this is a lie. The Ministry of Magic guarantees that you are not in danger of any dark wizard. If someone is alarming you with fibs about reborn dark wizards--"

"But there not fibs!" Harry shouted angrily.

"DETENTION!"

Zero had been about to interject into the line of fire... but hearing the final note and watching Harry leave the room made him decide against it.


A/N:

Hey! I got a few reviews. Glad people liked it! wasn't sure it'd be so popular.. Also, I think I have a more firm number to place my line in the crossover of number 6-8 or VK HP. Pure coolness.

--

Ok and also most of this is what I typed up from Naruto/HP Crossover so if I missed a few ninja names in the swapping process tell me. I just wanted what happened in the next class up and out of the way.

Zero/Yuki fluff coming up... or Hermione finding out.. or something like that... I need my book around to write more really and I just lost it again. -.-