Alright everyone. Here's Chapter 1 to my story. I hope you guys like it. So, read and review please:)
Disclaimer = I don't own Twilight!!!
Chapter 1
Empty heart
Bella's Point of View
Life used to be amazing.
Loving father, neurotic mother away from me, great friends and… wonderful boyfriend.
How can two out of those four things disappear in less than a year? Life used to be much easier when my heart was complete. But now, all I feel is nothing. Absolute darkness fills my heart, my now empty pained heart. Why must things be so complicated? Can't life just let things be easy and joyful? There's a simple answer to that. No. Life has to hurt in the excruciating way possible.
Every waking moment, my mind replays the exact words that broke my heart. Even in my dreams, it just keeps on haunting me. Every effort I gave in the past months has apparently gone down the drain. Charlie, my hard-working father, can't even stand to be in the same room as me. Apparently, my zombie mood has been going around the house. I tried so hard to keep my mood under control. Again, a wasted effort.
How could I have been so blind? Someone like him could never love someone like me, a mere weakling. I was never a part of that world. The magical world is exceptionally different from the normal world. It's different from the normal world I live in right now.
Since that day, I have changed.
My emotions had gotten the better of me. I let myself get carried away into thinking that I could spend the rest of my life with that angel. Of course, my misguided human eyes must have deceived me.
My movements were mechanical. This is my routine: eat breakfast without a word to Charlie; go to school; don't say a word in class; go home and do my homework; make supper for Charlie and go to bed. Quite the zombie life, isn't it?
But then again, every now and then, my best friend would come to pay a visit or call me so I could visit him. He was my ray of sunshine. But… shouldn't the sun warm you up and give you happiness? I guess Jacob wasn't the kind of sun I needed.
"So Bella, have you heard a word I said?" Charlie's voice rang through my head but didn't make any sense. My head shot up slowly to gaze at my father.
"I'm sorry Dad, what were you saying?" I asked, lifeless as usual. My dad didn't have to suffer with me.
"Bells, I don't know what to do with you. I should probably send you to your mom's or something. You need some excitement." Charlie implied as he placed his large hand on his forehead in defeat.
Confusion crossed my features. "What are you talking about? There's plenty of excitement here."
"Bella, you've been lifeless for months now."
"I'm trying to handle it."
"I know honey. I'm not saying anything about that. But… I want my Bells back." He wasn't being subtle, that's for sure. My hand went limp and dropped my spoon into the cereal bowl. I ran my fingers through my hair and my elbows slammed into the table.
"Dad, I'm trying as hard as I can. It's not easy for me. You have to understand that I'm not leaving. You've tried this before, remember?" My voice exclaimed lifelessly. I grabbed my cereal bowl, placed it in the sink and walked towards the door. If I didn't leave soon, I'd probably be late for school. "I've got to go to school. I'll see you tonight." Of what I can remember, this is probably the longest conversation I've had with Charlie for weeks.
"Alright, have a good day at school." Charlie tried to say but his voice was muffled in the house. I had closed the door before he could finish his sentence. Since when did I act this way with Charlie?
I entered my run-down car and drove down the empty cold street. Tears ran down my cheeks as I drove. Of course, my vision was started to blur as more tears made their way down my face and into my lap. I stopped on the side of the road and wiped my tears away. My forehead fell on the steering wheel and more tears filled the corner of my eyes.
I changed so much in the last few months. He changed me so much since he left. My depression had gotten everyone upset. Unbelievable… I was never the type of person to go into such a depression but of course, there's a first for everything. I needed to do something. Maybe I should go to my mother's for a while. She was always one for adventure, new hobbies almost every month. It kept her occupied and it would probably change my mood for the better. And it would help Charlie if I got away from this place for a while.
Come on Bella, pull yourself together, I thought as my tears just kept coming and coming. It has been a while since I cried this much. The tears had to stop. The first school bell would be ringing soon and I couldn't be late for school. Well, especially not today. I wiped the tears away and started driving once more.
The drive to school didn't take that long. Of course, I only had five minutes to get to class. For a klutz such as myself; running wasn't the best thing to do at this moment since I did fall a lot. I grabbed my books from my locker and headed to class right when the bell rang. Mr. Berty, my English teacher, didn't even notice that I was seconds late for his class. He had already started his lesson and didn't need anybody disturbing him.
My seat was at the far end of the class, where nobody could stare at my back and insult me. But what made this class pleasant was the fact that I sat beside Angela Weber, my best friend. She helped me through the tough months of depression. "What's the matter? You're never late." Angela whispered as I took my normal seat. I turned my attention to her and saw that she looked quite worried, but I wasn't sure why she was.
"Um… nothing. Just took it slow this morning."
"Are you alright? Your eyes are red." Oh, so that was why she was worried. My tired eyes still had the red ringlets under my eyes. She knew I had cried.
"Yeah… I just… I'll explain at Lunch, alright?" I whispered back. She nodded and turned her attention back to Mr. Berty's lecture. Class definitely dragged on. As usual, I couldn't pay attention. My mind had wandered off again. And when that usually happened, my fingers found my pen and just started scribbling across my notebook. Just another way of distracting me from my misery.
Lunch came soon afterwards. Angela met me at my locker right after class. "So, what happened?" Angela asked as I grabbed my Lunch money and headed towards the cafeteria with her by my side.
"Um… I guess you could call it a mental breakdown. I talked with Charlie and he tried to convince me to go to Florida and stay with my mom." I explained quickly. It didn't make me uneasy to talk about this kind of thing with Angela. She had been there for me ever since that dreadful night. So, how could I not open up to her?
"And what did you tell him?"
"I told him the same thing I told him a few weeks ago. It's a definite no. But…"
"Oh no. There's a but." She mocked with a smile, trying to cheer me up. It most definitely worked. I giggled all the way to the Lunch table. Since Mike and Jessica finally decided to leave our little group during my depression stage, Angela and I only ate with Ben.
"Very funny Ang, but I was thinking that maybe I should leave for a while. Maybe get some sun and get my mind off of things." She looked so sad when I finished explaining. I didn't want to leave but… it would probably be better for everyone, including me. "Maybe for a week or two over there would do me some good…" I finished sadly as I poked the plastic fork into my salad.
"You don't have to go. We'll be right here to help you get through this." Ben assured me, rubbing his gigantic hand across my arm.
"We're here for you Bella." Angela assured with her lovable smile. I gave her the best smile I could until someone behind me started screaming.
"Hey Swan! Throw out the garbage!" A guy screamed at me before throwing something extremely hard at my head.
I knew that guy. He used to be one of my friends, until he left me. Since that horrid night not too long after my dreaded birthday party, a lot of things have changed. Mike Newton—one of my best friends since I moved to Forks—tried to get me to go out with him. Yes, Mike tried to cheat Jessica Stanley—one of my ex-best friends—with me, the plain Jane. Once he got the hint that I didn't want to go out with him, he started to bully me. And then, to top it all off, Jessica turned against me and started bullying me along with Mike and mostly half the school.
Even Eric Yorkie and Tyler Crowley joined her! I see everyone is deserting me.
Mike's half-bitten apple hit me right across the head and rebounded onto the floor. It hurt, but it can only bruise my head, not my pride. I didn't care what anyone thought of me. I had to keep my dignity intact if I could keep my sanity.
After the apple incident, everyone joined in the laugh. They threw me anything they could get their hands on. Juice boxes; apples; banana peals; even the occasional pop cans. I didn't do anything, just ate my salad in peace as they threw their lunches at my back and head.
"Bella, you can't let this go on." Angela admitted sadly. Ben started to get out of his chair but I just grabbed his arm roughly and yanked him back into his seat.
"Don't. They'll just start bullying you, Ben. Let them get their anger out on me, not you guys." I assured them as others threw their garbage at me. What else could I do? This has been going on for months now. Ever since… I can't keep thinking about this! "I don't mind the bullying. Builds character, I guess."
"Trust me, you've got enough character for ten people here." Ben said as he sipped his Coke slowly and leaned into his chair.
I chuckled once. "Yeah, you might be right…" I added with a sad voice. I lifted my head to look outside but something caught my eye by the entrance door. There were a few people coming in the cafeteria. My eyes grew wide as I looked the teenagers over. I remembered them…
Oh god.
So, what did you guys think? I hope you liked my first chapter. Kinda had a little writer's block on it but here it is:)
PS: Next chapter will be in Bella's Point of View so, expect something hard and sad. But it'll be good, trust me.
REVIEW!!!
Bellacullenswan17
8
