Welcome to my second entry of my collection, Among the Many!
I saw Endgame for the second time a couple days ago and I'm blown away, still. I WANT CLINT WHUMP FICS! I decided to write some myself, and I have some good ideas... :D
Anyway, this one-shot CONTAINS ENDGAME SPOILERS of course.
SPOILERS BELOW.
When the team returns from the Quantum Realm, I love how they all were talking amongst themselves before Clint stomps on the ground with the most emotional, scarred, saddest expression of dread on his face. But I started thinking, what if this reaction and Clint's internal reaction afterward went a different way? This is what this one-shot is about. I basically rewrote Nat's...well, the Vormir scene, in my own words from Clint's memory. I cried while writing this partly because I was listening to Endgame music while I was writing it, and partly because I wrote it the night I saw Endgame for the second time. Everything was still very very fresh.
If you want to listen to the same music I cried to while writing it, then the tracks are Totally Fine and Not Good.
Enjoy!
Disclaimer:
I do not own the Avengers movies, the Marvel franchise, or any of the characters. That all belongs to Marvel Studios. Everything to Marvel Studios. Any added dialogue, plots, or characters are mine, but nothing else. I don't own it.
One-Shot: An Alternate, Longer Reaction to Natasha Not Returning
Title: We Fought To Die
The blazing colors of the Quantum Realm zip into the past as the team warps back to the present. At once, excited chatter explodes into being as helmets fold back and curiosity demands answers. Every word fades into background as I lift my right hand and curl open my fingers. The soft, orange glow of the Soul Stone reflects back at me, sitting so innocently in the palm of my gloved hand. The world blurs as tears sting in my eyes. With every beat of my heart, the Soul Stone seems to pulse in response.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
The tears spill from my gaze. Cold air swirls around me as if I'm back on Vormir, against at the bloody sunset as the two of us fight to die:
I knock Natasha over, pinning her down.
"Tell my family I love them."
Legs tripping mine. Disarmed. On the ground. Nat's standing over me, arm poised.
"Tell them yourself."
Her wrist flashes blue and a shock of electricity crackles through my bones. I snap back against the ground, crying out.
Then Nat's gone and, by her footsteps, she's running.
I jump to my feet and fire an arrow. A small explosion disables her.
Now's my chance.
Now I'm running, the snow dropping in slow motion. Closer, closer, closer– NOW.
I rocket off the ledge, leaping into the sunset.
Time. Stands. Still.
Natasha's body rams into mine and we both hurtle off the edge.
We're falling, fading, together.
Nat fires a grappling hook onto the wall and we jolt to a stop. Pain cracks along my arm as we slam against the stone. Gritting my teeth, I shoot a glance at the hook holding our weight. The wire's caught on my belt, restricting movement and suspending…me…in one position. Natasha's gripping my wrist like a vice as gravity battles for dominance. Straining, I reach for her hand with my free one and our fingers come within mere inches of each other. The pain from the earlier collision stabs through my muscles and I withdraw with a grunt.
Natasha blinks at me, her emerald eyes flooded with a gentle acceptance. Her lips twitch into a gentle smile.
The snow, the cold, the pain, none of that registers anymore. My actions restricted, our positions locked by the hook, Nat at gravity's mercy…
No. She can't.
I shake my head, my eyes welling up. "No."
Natasha's whisper floats on the wind. "Let me go."
My heartbeat surges. No. Please, no. She can't, she can't, she can't.
Snow catches on her eyelashes."It's okay."
Tears pour from my gaze, my stomach churning. "Please…"
One last grin touches her face. Then she kicks off the wall and slips from my grasp.
"NO!" I twist to catch her, but she's pushed herself out of my reach.
Natasha's body plummets, smaller, smaller, smaller, her red pigtail flying beside her.
Shaking with incoming sobs, I squeeze my eyes shut, unable to watch.
One second. Two seconds. Three seconds. Four–
A thud sounds from far below, as well as the distant crack of bones.
Hanging, suspended, dangling from a grappling hook, I melt into tears.
The clouds above part and circle upward into a spiral, throbbing with blue veins of light.
I tilt my head back. A flare of lightning blinds me and–
I blink a couple times to bring myself back to the present. I'm trembling so hard that I'm vaguely surprised I've been able to hold on to the Soul Stone. But something's different around me.
Everyone's fallen silent. Staring at me, no doubt.
I drag my chin up, latching my gaze on the person nearest.
Steve.
He steps toward me, swallowing hard. "Clint?"
Bruce's green frame shifts. "Where's Nat?"
"A thud sounds from far below, as well as the distant crack of bones."
My muscles go limp and the Soul Stone clatters to the floor.
She's gone, she's gone, she's gone.
A hand squeezes my shoulder. Steve's intense eyes carve into my own, one thousand questions swimming in the blue depths. "Clint?" The single murmured word presses on the truth, which freezes like ice in my veins. The words die on on my lips. Instead, I twitch my head from side to side, wordlessly confirming their suspicions.
Somewhere far away, Bruce pounds a fist on the floor.
I crumple to my knees, the Soul Stone sitting between my hands.
No…
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Clint whump!
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