ALEX'S POV
"Novak," I breathe out, running a hand through my hair in exasperation. "Are you trying to get fired?"
I had a headache before; now I have a migraine.
Ten minutes ago I foolishly thought I had a moment's free time. I opened my laptop in an attempt to answer some long overdue emails, only to have my phone ring and Arthur Branch ask me to clean up Casey Novak's latest mess.
So here I am, standing in her office.
"You know better than to shoot your mouth off. I know Branch has talked to you before. That defense attorney that you went off on? Do you know who his father is?"
Casey glares at me, sitting back in her chair and crossing her arms in front of her chest in a defensive posture. "No, but I bet I am about to find out."
"His father is on the board of the State Bar," I tell her. "And he called Branch and gave him an earful about your conduct. As you can imagine, Branch isn't interested in having someone on the State Bar board be angry with him."
"So he went and tattled to daddy, and daddy fought his battle for him?" Casey sneers. "Charming."
I sigh. "I need you to take this seriously."
"Aren't you even going to ask me what happened? Hear my side of it?" Casey demands.
She's so worked up. I can tell she's upset and angry. And as angry as I am, a part of me can't help but be turned on by how worked up she is right now.
She's beautiful even when she's angry. Maybe even more beautiful than usual. She gets a slight blush on her cheeks, and I've noticed the way she chews her bottom lip subtly.
I shake my head, shaking away the I inappropriate thoughts. I'm Casey's superior; I can't be thinking about her this way.
"Okay. Why did you go off on him?" I humor her.
"Because guys like him think they can say whatever they want. We're women and we have to put up with it. Well, we don't and I won't. He kept making comments to me about my looks and I kept blowing it off and ignoring it. That's nothing new; you know how it is. But it went too far when he asked of my seat were comfortable enough or if I would like to sit on his lap. I let him know what a disgusting pig he was, and I make no apologies for it."
I'm suddenly not angry anymore; I'm enraged, and not at Casey.
"That's disgusting. I am sure his father neglected to mention that to Branch." I know I shouldn't say what comes to mind next, but I say it anyway. "I'm glad you let him have it; no one has a right to talk to you that way. Good for you."
Casey looks downright shocked that I am taking her side. She states at me for a moment, and then says, "You're condoning it?"
"Well not exactly. You do have to practice care with what you say. But I'm glad you stuck up for yourself."
Casey is smiling now. She has such a lovely smile. I wish she would wear it more often.
"How big is the pile of shit I stepped in? Do i need to go see Branch?" Casey asks.
Leave it to her to put it that way.
All my anger is gone now. Casey has a way of doing that to me like no one else can. She gets under my skin and stays there and I find myself easily swayed.
"No. Lucky for you, I have family on the board as well. I'll take care of it." Casey smiles at me. "But look, you really need to be careful. You're a great prosecuter and I would hate to see you jeopardize that. Just please, once in awhile, use a filter."
She looks at me, and then draws a halo around her head in the air. It's so cute and endearing that I almost blush. But somehow I'm able to keep my composure.
I say goodbye to Casey and head back to my office. It's a busy day and as focused as I try to be, thoughts of Casey just keep creeping in.
.2
A couple hours later there is a knock on my closed office door. A closed door means i am busy, and I sigh and ask who is there.
Instead of answering, the door opens and Casey steps inside, holding something behind her back. Without a word she approaches my desk and sets down a brown paper bag.
"What is this?" I ask. I raise an eyebrow and cross my arms in front of my chest. I look at the brown paper bags as if they are radioactive.
Casey smiles at me. "An apology. It's from that Chinese place that you like."
I stare at Casey. God, she's beautiful. I hope she knows that; I hope she has someone tell her that every day.
I had been so angry at her just a couple hours ago. And now, seeing her smile and looking at those subtle freckles on her nose, all the anger melts away and is replaced with a feeling I haven't felt in awhile.
"I know it won't make up for what I did," Casey says. "I'm sorry that Branch made you deal with it. All I can do is say I'm sorry and offer you this delicious food. I hope you will accept my apology."
If it were anyone else I would toss them out of my office. But Casey brings out all my weaknesses and as strong and stern as I want to be, I can't be.
I find myself smiling back at her and I motion at the bags. "Let's see what you got."
Casey opens the bags. She got rice and orange chicken and two egg rolls. How she knew orange chicken is my favorite I don't know.
Casey watches me hopefully. "Is it okay?"
I raise my eyes to meet hers. She smiles again and that's enough to make me melt into a puddle under my desk. Her smile goes all the way to her eyes.
I pretend to be disinterested in the food and casually say, "Well I am hungry and this saves me a trip, so...apology accepted."
Casey seems relieved. I swear her eyes actually twinkle at me. She thanks me and turns to leave my office.
I suddenly don't want her to go. Having her here makes my stress melt away. I think of nothing but her and what it would be like to kiss her.
"Stay and join me," I say, effectively stopping her in her tracks. She turns around and looks at me. "There's enough for two. Stay and have lunch with me. Unless you have somewhere you have to be?"
CASEY'S POV
Alex Cabot wants me to stay and eat lunch with her. She's looking at me hopefully and her blue eyes reflect warmth.
"Casey? Do you have somewhere you have to be?" she asks again, snapping me out of my trance.
If I did I would immediately shrug it off to have lunch with the most beautiful woman in the world.
I have liked Alex for a long time. She's strikingly beautiful but that's not the reason I have developed feelings for her. She's fiercely intelligent and confident and passionate for her job. Yes sometimes she can be cold but I have always thought it was a tactic to detach herself from her job.
And now she's asking me to have lunch with her in her office. Her eyes have almost a pleading look to them and I sit down in the chair in front of her desk without a word.
She smiles, and it lights up her whole face. I don't see her smile often and the sight almost takes my breath away. It makes her much more beautiful, if that were even possible.
She smiles again and sets one of the containers of orange chicken on the desk in front of me. She opens the bag as if looking for something, frowning. "Didn't you get chopsticks?"
I laugh. "Seriously, Alex? I'm too clumsy to eat with those."
She does kind of a half smile half frown and it's the cutest thing in the world. "Well I'm graceful."
Don't I know it.
Alex eyes me and opens the top drawer of her desk. I watch as she places two packs of sealed plastic forks on the desk. "You're lucky I'm prepared, Casey, or you'd be going back for chopsticks."
Casey. She called me Casey. My heart skips a beat. She usually always addresses me as Novak. Hearing her say my name has a ring of familiarity to it.
I mentally scold myself for overthinking this. She asked me to stay for lunch and she's trying to be friendly; that's all.
"How are you doing?" Alex asks, sinking her fork into a peice of chicken and taking a bite.
It's such a normal, casual thing to ask someone. Small talk, usually. But the way she said it - and the way she is looking in my eyes - feels like she actually cares.
I wish I could tell her; I long to tell her. I want to tell her I'm lonely and long for someone to come home to. Someone to vent my frustrations to that will understand. Someone to put their arms around me and tell me we will face the world together. Someone to fall asleep with.
I haven't been on even a date in over a year. I'm always working. Anyone I've dated in the past has been scared away by my job.
I wonder if Alex dates, and if so, what kind of man - or woman; wishful thinking - would she be interested in? It would have to be someone as smart and gorgeous as she is. I'm neither of those, and she's way out of my league.
I need to stop torturing myself with these thoughts.
Alex Cabot will never feel the same way about me.
