A/N: Thank you so, so much for all of the reviews! They mean the world, and keep me motivated to write.
I want to apologize for my absence. Life has been rather chaotic. It's my plan and intention to post much more regularly.
There was never any mention of Cora's middle name before she married Robert, so the middle name I have given her here is my own headcanon.
Cora had rushed out onto the gravel, her feet stumbling slightly as the uneven ground shifted beneath her. She'd not even taken the time to grab her coat or gloves, instantly regretting the decision as the icy wind whipped around her. Her agitated breath came out in small puffs as she walked further from the abbey, realizing as she crossed the lawn that she had no idea where she was going, nor any idea of how to get back once she got there.
It was all going wrong; all of it. Everything she suggested-everything she wanted for her wedding-was quickly dismissed in favor of something "more suitable". She had quickly lost control of the situation, and the event being planned now was beginning to look like someone else's wedding-not the event that she had been daydreaming of since Robert had asked for her hand. She wondered briefly if all of the fuss was worth it. Was this life she had chosen worth the headache that it had already become? Was she making the right decision; leaving everything she had ever known behind to marry a man whom, though she loved him, was still basically a stranger?
Her thoughts were spinning wildly, overwhelming her as she made her way to a small bench that sat under a tree not far from the house. She had only just sat down when she heard a voice calling from behind her.
"Cora!"
Cora groaned, her head falling forward slightly as her mother's voice reached her ears. Despite the tone of aggravation she could detect in Martha's voice, she didn't answer.
"Cora Margaret!"
Slowly rising to her feet Cora turned, her face blanching as she took in her mother's stern expression. 'Mother?"
"What do you mean, storming out like that?" Martha's ire was palpable.
"I only-"
"You know that woman already thinks us to be heathens. Are you trying to prove her to be correct in her assumptions?"
"Of course not! But-"
"Listen to me, Cora." Martha drew in a long breath before continuing. "It should come as no great surprise to you that Lady Grantham acts the way she does. We are new money, and that is frowned upon here almost as much as it is at home. It should also come as no surprise the reason Robert is marrying you."
Cora hung her head at her mother's words. Though Robert had always made every effort to make her feel comfortable, though he was kind and thoughtful, Cora did indeed know the primary reason her fiancé had pursued her. It was the same reason every other man had looked at her over the course of the Season. Her money.
"But, I love him, Mother," Cora spoke quietly. "I know that the main reason he pursued me was for my money. But, I love him."
"I know you do, my dear," Martha sighed, taking her hand. "And it worries me to no end to think of you ending up hurt."
"Does it?" The bitterness in Cora's voice as she jerked her hand away was surprising even to her own ears. "When this whole thing was your idea in the first place? 'We need to better the family name, Cora.'" She watched as her mother's nostrils flared in indignation at her mockery, but she continued. "'I'm taking you to London to find a husband.' Well, Mother, I have fulfilled your wishes. I will one day be the Countess of Grantham. You can brag to your friends and the New York elite that your daughter is now an English aristocrat."
"You make me sound very callous and cruel, Cora." Pain registered on Martha's face. "I only ever want what's best for you; you know that. I know you love Robert. And I'm thankful that he intends to be kind to you, and to make you happy. But, my dear, do not allow your emotions to fool you into believing that Robert feels the same for you. We all know that his family needs your father's money to keep up the estate. I just don't want you to set up unrealistic expectations for this marriage. I don't want you to believe it to be more than it is."
"You're supposed to be on my side, Mother." Cora couldn't hide the disappointment in her voice as she listened to her mother almost parrot the words of her mother-in-law-to-be.
"I am on your side, Cora. I'll always be on your side. But part of a mother's responsibility, which you'll learn soon enough, is to protect her children. In a few weeks, your father, brother, and I will be back on the other side of the Atlantic." Cora swallowed and looked away. "We won't be here to protect you at every turn, my dear. You're strong, Cora, and I want to know that you won't let your heart get ahead of your brain."
Cora pressed her lips together, and turned once again toward Martha. "It's a bit late for that. I chose Robert because I love him. Not for this grand estate, not for the eventual title of Countess, not because it will afford me a prominent position in society. You know that I was sought after by men with higher titles. But I didn't love them. I could never spend the rest of my life with someone I didn't love. I know you think I'm foolish—"
"I never said that."
"Haven't you? Isn't that what this entire conversation has been about?" That seemed to silence her mother. "I know what I've gotten myself into," she lied. She didn't; not really. Though she had only been back in England for a handful of weeks, it was becoming increasingly obvious that she had bitten off quite a bit more than she could chew when it came to many things. She'd underestimated the outright contempt of her soon-to-be mother-in-law, as well as the extensive and intricate code of etiquette to which she would be expected to adhere. Most things about this country were either archaic or bewildering to her American sensibilities, and she worried that she would never be able to fully wrap her mind around them all. But, she was determined to try.
She was also determined to make a good life with Robert. She'd heard tell of the average aristocratic marriage, how cold and bitter they ofttimes became. However, she was determined that theirs would not be amongst them. She was aware that Robert did not love her; however, he did like her a great deal—had even told her as much after dinner the previous evening—and she felt that, over time, he would come to genuinely love her.
"Mother." Her voice was calm and steady. "I know I have a long and difficult road ahead of me. I am under no illusion that any of this will be easy. If Lady Grantham is this obstinate and unyielding during the engagement period, I can only imagine how she'll be once Robert and I are married. But, Mother, I do love him so very much, and I'm willing to do whatever I must to make this work."
"Well," Martha narrowed her eyes, "It's good that I raised a fighter. Heaven knows your going to be engaged in one after the other with a mother-in-law like that."
