A/N: Hope you are all still with us. And remember, that Demyx went with Roxas to London for a month. Any questions, feel free to PM us and we'll clear it ALLLLL up:D
Zexion - a month later
I wasn't happy. There was something missing in my life and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I wasn't okay with my daily regular routine any longer, constantly feeling the need for something more. I'd tried changing the fruit I ate for breakfast, eating berries instead of apples, juice instead of milk. Bread with butter instead of without. It had been daring, but it hadn't made much of a change in the way I was feeling.
When the food change hadn't worked, I'd decided to try and change my appearance, tucking my shirt in properly, buying a black vest and pants instead of my regular dark grey. Dark grey was less obvious than black, black although dark, was elegant, being elegant instantly led you to pop out in the crowd, I'd always wanted to avoid this... I'd tried and apparently I'd been wrong, I hadn't felt more on the spot with a black suit instead of a dark grey one. Shirt tucked in or out didn't make much of a difference either... So, I'd tried to go to the barber, finally taking my father's advice to get my hair cut, but being able to hide being that lock... It was a security I couldn't seem to give up, so I'd let it be, not getting it cut in the end.
Since food and appearance hadn't done the trick, I'd tried to stop reading the romance genre, but that just made my heart ache and I missed the fairy tale heroes so much so, I hadn't been able to keep it up for very long.
I'd gotten drunk for the first time in my life, assuming such an experience would open my eyes, but it quite honestly only made me feel sick... I hadn't been very happy that following morning, either.
Then I'd assumed it must be because of that... feeling. The ones that had been given to me by a special someone. Someone I'd chased away for reasons I wasn't quite sure I could figure out. I'd doubted myself, thinking that maybe kissing a woman would make everything fall right into place. It had been nasty and I'd made sure it hadn't lasted longer than a few seconds, feeling guilty.
Of course, after a while of wallowing in that guilt because I'd felt like I'd cheated that special someone, I'd gotten angry. I had nothing to feel guilty about. He'd gone without telling me what I'd done wrong. After the anger had faded, I'd felt sad because I didn't like feeling angry.
So in the end I'd decided it had nothing to do with what I ate, looked like or how I felt about that someone or people in general... it had to be the store.
Detaching my eyes off the ground, I nodded at my surroundings, crossing my arms as I smiled in satisfaction at the many piles of books. I'd decided to move the furniture around, not opening the store today to be able to make the changes. The counter was still in place, as was my armchair and side table. I'd contemplated moving those, but I knew I wouldn't be able to carry through the winter without being able to sit down behind the counter and enjoy the warm fire at the same time. So that had stayed put.
But the shelves! I'd moved those all around so I could create a seating spot in front of the store's window. Two big armchairs I'd gotten for a fair price with a low coffee table. I'd always wanted my customers to have the option to sit down with a book, read a couple of pages, order a coffee. I didn't know how to do the service though, so I wouldn't be making coffee and tea available in my store just yet, but I'd decided to grab some courage and maybe learn how to do this. For now, the customers could simply sit down with a book and... not drink yet.
Sighing heavily, I smiled at my handiwork, happy with the new furniture arrangement. All I had to do now was put the books back in the shelves and I'd be done with my big achievement of today. I heard a scraping at the window, but when I turned to look there was nothing there. Suddenly, there was a quiet knock on the door.
Frowning, I wondered who it could be as I'd made sure to turn the sign and show everyone the store was closed for today. I was about to make my way open, but was surrounded by many book shaped islands.
"C-come in!" I allowed all the while carefully making my way out between the piles.
"Sure." I heard a muffled voice respond and the knob turned and the door opened. Demyx walked in, glancing around and furrowing his brow. "Zexion? What's going on?"
"Wh-what- De- I- Y-you..." Swallowing nervously, I figured speech wouldn't be the most available option at the moment as my eyes were glued on Demyx. He'd gone! Why was he back? I hadn't expected him to come back... Was he no longer upset with me? Why had he been upset so much so, it had made him leave for so long? My body frozen, I heard a pile off books fall over, but right now I was too busy staring at the man I felt many, many feelings for, so busy in fact, I barely registered as a second tower keeled over. "I-I'm-" I breathed deeply. "I thought you'd gone f-for good."
"No, I...Zexion, I'm sorry. I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry for what I did to you." Shutting the door behind him, he took a hesitant step forward before wincing and standing still. "I just wanted to stop by and see you." He closed his mouth and shuffled his feet, looking extremely uncomfortable.
I frowned in confusion. "I d-don't understand. What it is y-you did wrong?" Except maybe for leaving without explaining why, that had been relatively hard to process. Still. "Why did you l-leave?" I asked, wincing as the hurt was audible in my voice.
"I thought that...you wanted me to leave." His voice was surprised and this time he did take a step forward. "You just ran into the other room after I kissed you. I figured that I'd taken advantage of you." Licking his lips he glanced around at the piles of books. "You're not...moving, are you?"
My eyes widened at the memory of why I'd left the room so quickly, feeling my cheeks burn with warmth. "N-no... I'm just changing the furniture." I told him first, looking down at the ground. "You didn't t-take advantage of me. I... I was-" Blinking, I looked at him somewhat sheepishly. "was feeling too much." I muttered, hoping I wouldn't have to spell it out for him to understand. I stared at him, thinking how silly it was that I'd spent this last month believing he'd left for that reason, or something other, I hadn't been sure... While he'd been thinking I'd wanted him to leave.
"Oh." His face turned red and his eyes swept over my body. "Sorry. I guess that this is, er, a misunderstanding then? Although I did want to tell you that I've been stuck in London for a month with my lord." Running his fingers through his hair sheepishly, he smiled at me.
My lips parted and I took a small step closer. "S-so you didn't stay away b-because you didn't want to see me?" I asked uncertainly, needing to make sure. "I'd thought about coming to f-find you, talk to you, b-but I'm not very brave..." I really had thought about that for a split second. "And I d-don't know where you reside..." I gave him a tentative smile, feeling a small bubble of excitement settle in the pit of my stomach.
"I did want to see you. I regretted ever walking away that day." Smiling now, he looked relaxed. "I am sorry for making you upset. And for future reference, I reside at the O'Malley estate. If you ever need to find me."
"I-I remembered the name of your employee, I could have f-found the estate, i-it's just better for their reputation not to be seen around a J-Joy." I murmured, taking in a shaky breath as I took another step closer towards him. "I... I think I've missed you."
"A Joy? What do you mean?" Walking over to me, he took a deep breath and stopped just a few inches away. "And...I know I missed you. Would you like to sit down?" He motioned his hand at the chairs.
I gulped, my body flushing with a flash of heat at the close proximity. "My p-parents are Lord and Lady Joy who g-gave up their title and used t-their fortune to create a business." I wondered how I'd managed to say that so clearly while my brain was foggy. "Demyx..." I breathed, my eyes hooding over as I placed a hand lightly against his cheek. I thought I'd successfully put all those feelings I'd felt for Demyx away, but I guess I'd just put them on hold, letting them go on now that he was here.
His breathe hitched at my touch and I felt his body tremble, but he didn't move away. Simply staring into my eyes for a moment before taking a deep breath and decisively leaning forward and kissing me. One hand was suddenly cupping my cheek while his lips pressed firmly against mine.
Making sure he couldn't get away, I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my body against him, a shiver running down my spine in a very delightful way. Moaning softly against his mouth, I ignored the heat rushing through me, not allowing myself to get embarrassed by my excitement this time. I gently traced his bottom lip with the tip of my tongue, needing him to kiss me like I knew he wanted to, but didn't for some reason. Opening his mouth, his tongue came out to meet mine, gently touching and licking at it. Moaning back at me, his arm came around and pulled me to him, his hand on my cheek tilting my head to the side so he could deepen the kiss even more.
Dear lord. I- "D-demyx.." I moaned out in a stutter, kissing him back feverishly, hoping I was doing an okay job at this. Letting my hands slide down his sides, I gripped his hips, steadying myself as my knees felt a bit weak. This couldn't get any better...
Sliding the hand that had been on my cheek down my neck and around my shoulder, he let it circle my back to hold me even harder against him, while his other slid down to cup my ass and push it into his hips. "Zexion..." He breathed, and his mouth broke away from mine and kissed along my jawline, trailing down to my neck where he sucked and nibbled for a moment before returning to my lips.
I was wrong, things could get better... My hands shot up into his hair, eyes rolling into the back of my head, "Oh god..." I groaned loudly, my knees buckling. Losing balance, I fell backwards, crashing into a pile of books and onto the ground, Demyx right there with me as he collapsed on top of me. Breathing ragged and heavy, I lay there, sprawled and dazed, wondering what else he'd show me that felt this incredible... After recovering from the fall.
Demyx
"Ow..." I winced as my side was currently being poked by the corner of several books. I couldn't imagine what Zexion was feeling. He'd landed on them with his back. Lifting myself up on my elbows, I looked down at him. "Are you all right? Hurt at all?"
"I'm okay..." He said breathlessly, sitting up so he wasn't lying on them anymore. "That was v-very nice." I'm sure he was talking of the kiss and not the crashing down to the floor part. He smiled at me with swollen lips and flushed cheeks. "I'm glad y-you're back." Unable to resist him, I leaned my head forward and kissed him once more quickly. Pulling away before I let myself get carried away, I stood up and put out my hand for him to grab.
Giving me a grateful smile, he got back up onto his feet with my help. "Would you l-like to help put the books back?" He asked softly. "You can talk with me. It looks like y-you wish to talk."
Giving him a grateful smile, I nodded. Yes, something to distract myself from his delicious taste and amazing mouth. Anything to help me regain my focus..."Yes, I would love to help you with your bookstore. I've got the evening off, so you can count on me. And," I paused and licked my lips, "I was hoping that I could get to know you better..." I raised my eyebrows hopefully.
He nodded, smiling, "I'd like that." Reaching up, he ruffled his hair, trying to straighten it without much success. He touched his lips softly, blushing as he caught me looking. "Those f-four piles are the children books, y-you can do those while I shelf the... romance genre." He murmured, a small grin playing on his lips as he moved over to a pile of books I assumed were the romance genre. "It's my f-favorite type. That is something n-nobody knows."
Chuckling, I made my way over to the stacks of books he'd pointed at. "Your favorite? Really? Is that why you're such a good kisser? You've read all the techniques and have mastered them?"
He blushed, but looked very pleased. "I wasn't b-bad then?" When I gave him a look, he grinned, putting some books up in shelves. "What more would y-you like to know, Demyx?"
"Tell me about you. What's your favorite color? Book? Music? Food?" I laughed at how fast I'd named everything, not giving him a chance to even respond. "Do your parents help you run the store, or are there more than just this one? Anything. You can ask me questions too." I started shelving the stack closest to me, grinning when I recognized some of the titles.
"Gold, A-austen, a-accordion-" He breathed carefully, taking a small break in the stutters. "Chocolate c-covered strawberries." He answered the first blurt of questions as fast as he could manage. "This is the o-only store. They built it together f-from scratch, giving up the J-joy title and responsibilities tied to it. They gave it t-to me when they decided to travel around the world." He smiled at me over his shoulder, shrugging. "I have n-no idea where they are right now. They c-could be making a stop in France, or be all the w-way in India." He cleared his throat then. "I've always s-stuttered and am n-not very good making friends and such." He moved over to another shelf, starting on another pile. "What are your f-favorites? Do y-you think you'll always work for the O'Malley's?"
"Your favorite color is gold?" That was kind of odd. "And yum, to chocolate covered strawberries. Umm, my favorite color is blue, I don't have a favorite author yet, piano, and I love sweet rolls." Starting another pile quickly, hopefully we could get done soon and be comfortable. Thinking a bit about his question, I nodded. "I suppose I will stay on as long as the O'Malley's need me. It's a very nice position and I don't have any other skills. It's very hard to get accepted into a new family without an introduction."
"Don't you have a d-dream job? Something you'd l-love to do?" He asked, hugging a book against his stomach as he looked at me, giving me a shy smile then. "Your hair looks gold when the s-sunlight shines on it..." Blushing, he looked away and continued to shelf more books.
I self consciously touched my hair and felt my face warm. Shaking my head, I smiled as I continued shelving. "I've only ever known being a manservant. And, in a way, it gives me a reason to get up every morning; I've never thought about something else. What I have thought about is learning more. Maybe taking a try at cooking, or even doing more of the mending. Roxas is sometimes hard on his clothes. I can't make all the repairs myself, but I would like to be able to."
"Roxas is Lord O'Malley?" He asked curiously. "D-do you have many friends?" And then before I could answer he added, "H-have you had many l-lovers?"
My jaw dropped. He wanted to know how many lovers I'd had? Dear lord..."Um, yeah. Sometimes I slip and call him that lately. But only at his insistence. My only real friend is Axel. He and Roxas...well, they are involved in a way." I didn't know if I should really tell him about my experience.
"I-I'm sorry, Demyx, I didn't mean to p-pry..." He said apologetically, looking embarrassed and concentrating on the shelves.
"No, no. It's okay. You just surprised me is all. Are you sure you want to know?" He may have just been asking to know, but unless he really thought about it, he might not want to.
"Well..." He murmured. "Maybe just reassure me y-you know what we're doing, because I s-sure don't." He chuckled, moving over to the back of the store, but then faltered in his step, realizing he'd already shelved there, so he turned, joining me to help.
"I've had two lovers and a small something with Axel when I was seventeen. It lasted about thirty minutes and we were quite drunk." I wanted him to know that I didn't have any sort of feelings for Axel and maybe, deep down, I could hope that he wasn't just experimenting with his feelings for me because they were new. I didn't believe that was the case...but I couldn't rule it out. It was a scary thought.
"He likes Roxas, y-yes?" He asked and when I nodded, he nodded. "Then I d-don't have to feel that jealously feeling."
Putting my hand over his as he reached for another pile of books, I smiled. "I'd be lying if I said I wish you wouldn't get jealous." Releasing his hand, I grabbed the stack and stood back up to shelve it.
He frowned, "I heard it's an unpleasant f-feeling." Looking at me he smiled. "But I'm s-sure I'll feel it if..." He trailed off, his brows knitting in slight confusion. "How does this w-work, Demyx? Men court women so they c-can marry and live their lives t-together." Turning, he put the book he was holding down, stepping closer to me so he could touch my cheek lightly. "What are we g-going to have?" He asked softly.
It hurt, that thought. Trying to think it through, I realized that there was not something positive that I could tell him about being together with a man. Truthfully? There was nothing that could be done. I could hope and wish all I wanted and even tell others that it would all work out, but that didn't mean it could actually happen. Turning away from him, I went to grab the last pile for shelves. Stopping so that my back was turned, I simply told it to him. "It doesn't work this way, Zexion. We don't marry, and we don't get to live our lives together. Unfortunately for people like us, there really isn't a happily ever after waiting. That's why I'm hoping that you really understand what you are getting into."
"B-but... We're together now and I'm very happy." He ducked under my arms so he could appear in front of me, wiggling himself in between my arms and the shelves behind him. "I-I've never felt the way I feel about you. When you were away for the m-month? I felt very alone and empty all of a s-sudden. I tried very hard to d-do something about it, but it didn't work." Placing his hands on my shoulders, he looked down at the ground, blushing lightly. "I d-don't feel that way when you're here." He murmured. "I missed you very much. I'd rather you n-not leave again."
I sighed and let my hands rest on his hips. He didn't seem to understand that this wasn't really a romance novel where the hero sweeps the damsel off her feet and they lived happily ever after. I'd seen a lot in my time, and I didn't really see a whole lot of happy endings for men. But I didn't want to give him up.
"I'll be here as long as you want me. I usually have my evenings free with Sundays being my entire day off. I'd be happy to spend them with you, if you'll let me." Giving him a soft smile, I tried very hard not crush him to my chest and roll him back among the books. He certainly brought out the lust in me, that's for sure.
He leaned in, placing a shy and soft kiss on my cheek. "You are welcome here any t-time, Demyx." He murmured, pulling back and looking at me curiously. "How old are y-you?"
"Twenty-five. And you, my fine young friend, how old are you?" I squeezed his hips, rubbing circles along his hipbone with my thumbs.
"Twenty-one." Looking around the store, he shrugged, "We c-could take a break?"
Glancing at the clock he had up in the corner, I nodded. "Okay. But may I have one more kiss, please?" I couldn't keep the pleading out of my voice. I was a sucker for him already. Chuckling he nodded while snaking his arms around my neck, stepping closer and giving me the kiss I wanted.
Zexion - a week or so later
"Welcome to Joy's bookshop, y-you may browse around and I'll be right here to g-give you assistance, should you need it." I murmured absently at the customer who'd walked in, the tinkling of the bell slowly fading. Standing behind the counter, I was looking at the floor plan of my shop, wondering how I would fit at least five tables in the conservatory... With some squeezing I could do it, but I would want them to be comfortable.
I needed a minimum of five tables to open up a tea house, expanding my bookshop into two running businesses. I'd gone to a small pastry restaurant up town, and the lady who owned the place had been very kind and patient, explaining the few rules that came along with food service. Five tables at the least, fresh products always and a wash room available to the customers. There were more, but those three were the ones that worried me.
I couldn't fit five tables into my conservatory and the only wash room I had, was the one in my living quarters. I didn't want customers to come into my living quarters... As for fresh products. I had to run the bookshop every day. I'm not quite sure I could get fresh products every morning. It would be too much to handle.
Sighing, I leaned over the floor plan, hanging my head. If only I could have the apartment above my shop. I could move my living quarters there and then use the space that was my bedroom as an extension to my conservatory, effectively fitting more than five tables, including a wash room available to the customers. Of course that left the issue of having to obtain fresh products every morning, but I suppose I could hire... someone...
Oh dear, having to interact with a person on such a friendly and daily basis? I'm not quite sure I could do that. I couldn't be the boss over someone, their employee... I could be my own boss and owner of the store, but I liked running it by myself since then I didn't have to worry about instructing someone on how to do things.
The only options I had left were to somehow find courage and talk to my neighbor, the mean bully butcher and convince him it was a splendid idea to sell the apartment above my store to me... Or, give up the idea of the shop expansion. I suppose the latter seemed more likely...
"Good day!" Blinking up, I gave the customer a smile as he left the store after having looked around. Sighing heavily again, I grimaced at the floor plan, running my hands through my hair. Father always told me to think big in life, I wouldn't get anywhere unless I thought big. I'd never done this so far and now that I was... it wasn't working.
The door opened again and I glanced up and saw Demyx walking into the store, a small smile on his face as he glanced around. "Good afternoon, Zexion."
I smiled widely, so very glad to see him. "Hello, D-demyx." I murmured, waving him over while I looked at the clock. Frowning, I asked, "Aren't y-you normally on duty at this hour?"
He winced and nodded. "Yeah, I would be on duty normally." Sighing, he walked over to me and glanced at the floor plans. "What's this? Are you thinking of expanding?"
I nodded, "Y-yes, but I don't think it will b-be possible." Pushing them away, I looked at him curiously. "Are you n-not okay?"
"I'm fine, just really...thrown for a loop. Something I didn't expect happened today. And it's been rather interesting. Why don't we sit down and I'll tell you." Giving me a small smile, he came closer and grabbed my hand leading me over to one of the chairs.
Sitting in the other one, he looked over at me. "Roxas has renounced his title as the future Lord O'Malley."
My eyebrows shot up, and I gingerly sat down in the armchair before my store window opposite from his. "That is... Y-yes, quite interesting and s-surprising. I- Well, why?" I suppose I was just a tad happy, secretly... He worked quite a lot of hours and I didn't get to see him very often. Maybe now that his main duty was no longer there, he would be here.
He turned to stare out of the window, a wistful look on his face. "In a word, Axel. Roxas gave up his title to move to a little cottage on the outskirts with Axel. They moved away this morning. I...I said goodbye and asked for the afternoon off. My lord hasn't needed me for quite some time and granted it." Shaking his head, he looked back at me. "I guess I might have some free time now that Roxas and Axel are gone."
Looking around the shop and particularly the door, I made sure no one was there before reaching out and gently placing my hand on his, giving him a sympathetic smile. "I-I'm sorry you won't get to s-see them as much. It is good they've f-found one another though." Clearing my throat and feeling a bit bad for being happy he could spend more time with me, I supposed I should distract him. "I... I wish to expand the b-bookshop into a tea house, have p-places for customers to s-sit, drink and eat while reading." I sighed, "I d-don't have the space, s-skills or time for it though and even if I did have the skill and t-time, I wouldn't be able to convince my neighbor," I grimaced at the thought of the mean butcher, "to sell m-me the apartment above."
Giving me a smile, he put his other hand on top of mine. "Thank you." Patting it once, he moved it to rest on his leg. "And what do you mean you won't be able to convince your neighbor? What's the problem and maybe I can help." Sighing and looking at me eagerly he said, "It is a welcome distraction and I want to help you if you need it."
I smiled at him, eagerly willing to share my ideas with him as well as the issues that were forming into obstacles to stop me from realizing the idea. "C-come on." I stood, gesturing for him to follow me across the shop and through the door beside the chimney. Stepping inside the conservatory, I winced at the jungle it had become... I'd feared the plants and flowers would die cause of my neglect, instead they'd retaliated by growing endlessly...
"It would b-be a very nice place to set some tables and s-serve tea and pastries. But I n-need a minimum of five tables and that d-doesn't fit in here, clearly." Turning around to look at him, I shrugged, "There's an apartment above the s-store, owned by my neighbor, the b-bu-buut-" I grimaced. "He's a b-butcher and terrifies me down to my very core." I muttered out. "If I c-could own the place upstairs, I could live there and use my b-bedroom as an extra space to s-serve lunch, including a washroom available to the customers. But..." I pressed my lips tightly together, hoping he saw the clear problem.
His eyebrows furrowed and he glanced at the wall that connected me to the butcher. "He won't sell to you? Why? Does he live up there or anything?"
Oh, yes, I'd forgotten the reason. "N-no. It is empty. My parents wished to buy it, b-but he wanted to sell it to them for m-more money as although they gave up their t-title, they still had the fortune. My parents didn't think it fair for him to raise the amount, and so they g-got in an argument." I sighed, "Since that fight, the b-butcher has never changed his mind."
He scowled and shook is head. "That's entirely unreasonable."
I nodded, agreeing, "Yes, m-most certainly unreasonable." I chuckled then, stepping closer to him, quickly peeking over his shoulder to make sure nobody was there still before placing my hands on his chest, playing with his vest buttons, "R-rumors have it that he used to be 'mistress' to a Lady and the a-apartment was their get away, but she broke his heart and left. When he found out my parents used to have a t-title, he then became unreasonable b-because of his lingering pain over his Lady." I reached up, and touched Demyx's lips softly, smiling before stepping away. "I d-don't know how I'd convince him to sell."
Stepping closer to me, he raised a hand to push the hair out of my face only to watch it fall back. Smiling gently at me, he rested his hand against my cheek. "Perhaps I could speak with him. I'll just buy it for you. I won't even tell him that I'm buying it for you. Maybe that will help him sell at a reasonable price. I bet it's hurting him to keep a hold of it."
Leaning into his palm, I appreciated the way it made me feel to be near him for a moment before answering. "That may j-just work. But there is still the issue of running two b-businesses at once while being just on my own." I murmured. "B-but I will let you do this f-for me once I've figured out how to make this idea work."
"You'll figure it out." He smiled. "And I will be eagerly awaiting the chance to drink tea with you in your shop. But, maybe I could give you a kiss right now as I can't seem to think of anything else." Licking his lips he leaned forward, stopping a few inches from my face.
I smiled, about to give him the kiss, but then quickly stepped away and pulled him with me towards the kitchen on our left when I'd heard the front entrance bell ring. "C-customer." I whispered. "I think we c-can only allow ourselves to touch after c-closing time." I gave him a sad look, quickly peeking out of the door to see the customer browsing the shelves, not able to see us.
"Yes, you are correct. Well," Glancing around while stepping back, he licked his lips. "How about I give you a hand today? I think your plants are trying to tell you 'hello, please prune us.'"
Glancing at the customer again, I nodded as he still couldn't see and then returned my attention to Demyx, leaning in to give him a soft kiss. "Hmmm... Y-yes, I'd be very grateful." I murmured, stepping back.
Giving me an exaggerated frown, he said, "I'll be here until you close then. Just for a real kiss from you." Smiling, I nodded my head happily at that suggestion, touching his cheek softly before moving away and back into the store so I could offer my assistance to the customer.
Demyx - a week or so later
"Yes, my lord." I bowed and excused myself from Lord O'Malley's presence, careful to keep my emotions to myself until I was out of his view. I'd been hearing rumors amongst the servants that the Lord and Lady seemed dissatisfied with the manor and estate lately and had been thinking of spending more time in London. Which would be hard, as the constant moving between here and there would take time and be quite expensive.
My lord had just informed me that instead of simply visiting London, he would now like to move there permanently. I'd listened as he told me and the other servants, and nodded along with the others. We understood that now we'd be moving from the place where we had always served them.
I listened to the idle and excited chatter of my coworkers and I tried not to think about what would happen to my time I spent with Zexion. It hurt too much. Making sure that the cook had my lord's order for what he wanted for dinner, I made the excuse of mending something and retreated to my room. Closing the door behind myself, I bit my lip and tried not to focus on it. I knew it. I'd told him. It wasn't going to work. I'd maybe see him a few times a year, if that. And the idea that we could somehow continue our love affair, if it could be called that, with me miles away in London was laughable.
And not a good kind of laughable, the bad kind. The kind that made me look at what Axel and Roxas had together with barely concealed envy. In fact, neither one was in this room with me and when I plopped onto my bed falling onto my back, I let my face drop it's mask. Those lucky fools. Lucky enough to be what they were and who they were.
I took a few deep breaths and tried to get a hold of myself. How was I going to tell Zexion? I was afraid of hurting him. He was too good to be hurt and I hated myself for being the one to do it. Before I left, I would have to make sure that I bought that property from the butcher for him. I'd actually spoken to the guy and mentioned that I was looking for a place in town to move to. Nothing much had happened, but I could do it. Better now than later. I figured we had a week or less to pack up the house and it was much more likely that I would be taken to London before everyone to help coordinate the household that they were moving to. I didn't have much time and he deserved better from me than to have me drag it out just to protect myself. Jumping up and grabbing my coat, tried to stop my heart from hurting as I went to Zexion's bookstore.
I knocked on the door and waited for him to answer, shuffling my feet and trying to at least look happy to be here. From the small window in the door I could see him appear through the bedroom door, looking passed the counter and when he saw me, he smiled widely, quickly rushing over so he could unlock and open the door for me.
"Demyx!" Taking my hand he quickly pulled me inside of the store, closing the door and then pulling the curtain that ran along the wall to conceal the door and window from the outside world. Once he was done, he moved close to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders, pressing his face into my neck.
I couldn't not put my arms around his waist and hold him against me. Maybe I could just take a moment to breath him in and remember him. "Hello, Zexion. I...am glad to see you." Giving the side of his head a kiss, I inhaled the smell of old books. I'd miss it, so very much. Squeezing him to me, I didn't move. I couldn't really let him go.
"I-I'm very happy to see you too." His lips moved against my neck as he said that, his hair tickling my chin. "It is l-later than usual, though..." He remarked, pulling his head back so he could look at me, but not moving out of my arms. "Is everything o-okay?" He asked, reaching up so he could try and smooth the frown from my forehead gently.
"No. It's not okay." I couldn't hold it in, I should have just bitten my tongue, but I couldn't stand it. "The O'Malley's are moving the estate to London." Hoping that he could understand without me having to spell it out, I still refused to remove my arms from around him.
I suppose he did understand as he stiffened, his eyes widening. "B-but-" Breathing in shakily, his fingers clutched my vest. "D-do you have to leave? When?"
"Within a week. As the manservant, it falls to me to prepare everything that my Lord will need when he arrives. I...I'm sorry. I wish I could stay." Releasing my arms from around him was probably the hardest thing I'd ever had to do. Taking a step back and bumping into the door, I grimaced. "I should go. This is hard enough and I just wanted to let you know." It wasn't fair of my to run away, but it just hurt too much.
"Now?" He exclaimed in surprised, looking shocked. "B-but there's a week- I. No!" He stamped his foot into the ground, looking angry before he moved towards me, making sure I couldn't slip out and away by pulling the key out of the lock and throwing it across the room. His glare faded into a soft and sad look before he quickly moved back into my arms, lips trailing numerous kisses down my neck. "I don't want y-you to leave."
"Zexion, I don't want to leave." Wrapping my arms back around him, I used one hand to push his face roughly upwards so that I could cover his lips with mine. This wasn't fair, but I didn't care. I wanted him and I know he wanted me. Just for now, just this moment...it was going to be okay for us to be together. No more thinking about London, no more knowing that I'd have to say goodbye. Just Zexion.
His hands gripped my vest, tugging while he kissed me back fiercely. Pressing his body as close as he could against mine, he moaned softly into my mouth, his fingers slipping beneath the layers of fabric so he could touch my back, tracing the skin lightly.
"Bedroom. Now." Running my hands down to his butt, I lifted him to me and slowly started moving towards the door to his bedroom. I wasn't thinking of anything but him now, of his tongue in my mouth and mine tracing his in return. Finally in the room, I settled us onto the bed, hovering over him, breaking the kiss momentarily to see if he was okay with this considering how inexperienced and-
"You're so beautiful..." He murmured without a stutter, his right hand still under my shirt and his left now touching my cheek. He didn't look uncertain at all what with the way he looked at me, clearly comfortable lying beneath me on bed.
"I used to watch for you, you know?" Kissing him and running my hands to his shirt to lift it over his stomach, I stroked his soft and warm skin. "I even followed you to this bookstore because I could not keep my eyes off of you." Opening the buttons on his shirt, I pushed it open so that I could trail kisses across his chest.
"Truly?" Panting, he let his fingers slip into my hair, massaging my scalp gently, while his other hand slipped down between our bodies, shakily undoing some of my own buttons. "I c-could never stop thinking of you, even if we barely talked f-first time you came into the shop." He whispered, pushing my shirt off and over my shoulders.
Moving my fingers to his trouser buttons, I quickly undid them while paying special attention to the place where his neck met his shoulders. Laying over him on my knees, I used one hand to prop myself up and the other to work his clothes off. I would not take him, no, that would be cruel. Tonight would just be about pleasure. Releasing the buttons, I pushed his pants down his hips and gently massaged his hips, moving back to his lips because I was not ready to see his naked flesh yet.
"It seems that I was lucky to find you. You are incredible."
"I-I wish you could keep me..." He murmured, kissing me back softly, a sad little frown playing between his eyebrows. "Y-you remember when we talked of jealousy?" I nodded against his mouth, his hands now slowly pushing my pants down. "I'm jealous of L-London."
Closing my eyes, not wanting him to see what I was pretty sure were tears starting now, I just kissed him desperately. Moving slowly so that I was now laying next to him, my dick resting against his bare leg, I lowered my hand to gently wrap around his length. Just holding it, hoping that he would not be alarmed.
His body trembled and he inhaled shakily, his mouth stilling the kiss as he moaned softly, tongue slipping out to wet his lips and mine as well since they were right there. His dick hardened in my hand, his hand on my hip squeezing.
"Why have we never done this b-before?" He breathed, moaning again as I moved my fingers up his length once tentatively.
"I did not want to push you. But I've wanted this for so long..." Breathing deeply, I massaged and squeezed his length, enjoying the warmth that I could feel coming from it. Despite my experience, I had never had the opportunity to really get to know my lovers before. They were usually affairs of opportunity, quick releases designed to satisfy for the moment. This...was something beyond that.
"Demyx..." His eyes closed, mouth parted as he panted against my cheek. I was sure he wasn't aware that he was moving his hips, pushing up into my hand, seeking more friction. I would have grinned at the impatient need he was displaying, but suddenly his hand wrapped around me, his fingers hesitant at first but then he seemed determined, rubbing and squeezing me, following my lead as he picked up the same speed I was working him in.
"Zexion...gods..." I panted and sped up my movements, knowing that I was the first to see him like this and loving that thought. Not only was it stimulating to have his hand around me, but hearing his breathy moans close to my ears was sending my desire through the roof. Moving my body closer to his, I grasped the tip of his cock in every stroke, knowing that would send him over in no time.
He mimicked my actions, them becoming somewhat sloppy as his body started to strain and tremble lightly, telling me he was very near which was most likely making it hard for him to concentrate. Seeking out my lips, he kissed me feverishly, his teeth nibbling gently on the bottom one before releasing and moaning loudly into my mouth. His hips jerked forward rapidly, the warmth of his spill covering my hand and his stomach. His hand on me froze like his body had, but knowing I would have to leave, I decided to be greedy, quickly moving my hand off him the moment he softened and wrapping them around his hand on my length, encouraging him to continue. He instantly reacted, picking up the speed he'd left off at, pressing himself closer against me, his lips dragging over my lips.
"Hmm... so g-good Demyx, amazing." His words spiked my heart and I released, spilling over both our hands and onto our skin. I moaned out his name as I came, and the open mouth kiss I gave him was hard and demanding. It had never felt like this before. My heart didn't want to stop racing, didn't want to think about leaving and my body would certainly never stop yearning for his. Especially now.
"Zexion, you may keep my heart." I whipsered, choking back the words as they were in that moment, silently killing me. Moving so he was settled partly on top, his naked body spread out over mine, he kissed me soft and long, a sweet kiss just because.
"I'll take very good care of it." He murmured.
Zexion
Tugging the robe around myself more tightly, I padded after Demyx who, after having gotten dressed, was making his way out of the store slowly. We'd lain together on my bed for a while longer, appreciating each other with soft touches and caresses, the occasional sweet kiss and murmured words.
But now he had to leave... and although he would be here another week before having moved to London officially, we'd- he'd... I? Both of us, I suppose, had reluctantly agreed it would be best if we not see each other again even if he was in town for a couple of more days. It would just make things harder by dragging out the goodbye that was inevitable.
I wanted to tell him again that I didn't want him to leave, but I knew it would make it harder for him to do anyway. Sighing as he reached the door, he turned to face me and I couldn't help but quickly step into his arms again, kissing him desperately.
"I'll miss you..." I said against his lips, frowning in pain and feeling the edge of my eyes water.
"I'll be yours forever." And I felt moisture against my cheek as he kissed me gently back, his hand stroking my hair back out of my face. He pulled away and gave me a forced smile. "Goodbye, Zexion."
Vision watery and blurry, I returned the smile weakly. "B-bye." I choked out, quickly reaching up to touch his face, stroking his cheeks. "I only want y-you." I'd be his forever as well, I did hope he knew this...
Surging forward to kiss me, I didn't have any time to respond before he'd pulled away. "I...I have to go." And with that he was out the door and gone into the darkness.
THE END.
Feel free to review and tell us what you think of us...*wink*
