Chapter Three

It had been a week since their kiss and Alex was just confused. She couldn't figure out for the life of her why he would just "feel" like kissing her. The idiot had called and called and called but she refused to give herself even a sliver of hope. Yes, she was a coward for avoiding him but if she didn't talk to him he wouldn't get a chance to tell her that he was sorry and that it had all been a mistake. She just felt tired and sad and ridiculous for admitting all her girly feelings to him. Figuring she needed to get out of her rut she got of her ass and decided to do something productive with her time. She took a shower and cooked herself some breakfast, after wards she tied her hair in a messy bun cranked up the music and began painting. Suddenly she heard soft knocking on her door and closed her eyes as she listened to a voice she had been missing for a week.

"Alex, please open the door. Its been a week, I miss you. Please talk to me. I know you're in there" To which she responded by cranking the music even higher and loosing herself in her art.

After about an hour in which his patience and tenderness had apparently disappeared he started yelling and banging on her door. "Alex Come on! I know you're there so stop being a bitch and just open the fucking door"

When silence filled the air Alex thought he had given up and left, but she had misjudged Jack's determination, he was not going away that easily. He spoke to her landlord, and he let him climb up the fire escape that led right into her bedroom window. He found Alex sitting on her couch a brush in her hand looking like she was lost. He watched her for a while, unsure of how to approach her without scaring her too much, taking in her messy bun and everything from the lope of her neck to the darkness under her eyes. He tapped her lightly on her shoulder and saw as her body tensed in fear.

"Alex its me."

"How the hell did you get in here?"

"Fire Escape" He said shrugging. She sat with her back slightly turned towards him, trying to hide her face, and he waited, calm as ever, for her to be ready to turn.

"What do you want Jack? What are you doing here?" she said resigned.

"I came here to talk to you" With that he jumped over the back of the couch and sat beside her.

"Talk about what Jack?"

"Well, maybe about the fact that you've been avoiding me for a week now!"

"I haven't been avoiding..."

"Yeah right Alex! We haven't spent a day without talking to each other since we met"

"What is there to say Jack?"

"Well, how bout school? Work? Music?"

"Don't try to be funny"

"I'm not joking Alex, I miss you"

"So what? You want me to pretend like Friday night never happened?"

"No, not at all. Actually I was going to ask you to grab some coffee with me"

"What?"

"Yeah, let's go on a date"

"I don't think that's such a good idea"

"Why not?"

"Well, because I-I..."

"Exactly, let's go"

"No, Jack no. It's not... I... we shouldn't do this"

"Why not?"

"Because your just asking me out cause you feel sorry for me"

"Is that really what you think?" A tone of sadness in his voice giving away his feelings.

"Yes"

"Well then,- he sighed and rumpled his hair, like he always did when he was nervous and confused- you don't know me as well as I thought you did" It took Jack a while to organize his thoughts and stop the urge to shake her. "Alex I meant everything that I said"

For the first time in a week Alex looked into Jack's eyes, his beautiful blue eyes. He could see the pain and sadness she had hidden so long ago. "Are you sure?" He couldn't help but think she looked like a wounded puppy begging to be saved. Smirking he said "Of course I'm sure Alex" He took her hand in his and stroked it lightly with his thumb sending shivers down her spine.

"I...I'm...I'm sorry...I just...it seems so surreal!" Jack couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah that happens" he answered her so sincerely she ended up chuckling right along with him, they both sat in silence for a while, each absorbed in their own thoughts, their hands intertwined providing each with a sense of security and fullness.

"I should clean this place up"Alex murmured looking at the mess of food and clothes all around, thinking back Jack couldn't remember ever seeing her apartment messy before.

"Not yet"

"What? Why not?"

"'cause I gotta do this first"

She looked at him with curiosity as he took her face into his hands, pushing away whatever hair had fallen to her eyes. He cradled her body in his arms as he came down brushing her lips with his, she could feel the warmth of his breath and smell traces of the cigarettes he loved. He pulled away right before the kiss and looked into her eyes.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Jack...I...Yes"

With that small admonition he tilted his head down, and kissed her passionately...

When they finally came apart, after what seemed like hours, they sat staring at each other for a while.

"Jack I've got to be honest with you"

"Ok, What?"

"There are things in my past, things I've never said"

"Alex, we've all got a past, you can tell me anything and I swear I'll understand."

She didn't know what gave her the urge to tell him, she only knew she had to, so that he could decide if he really wanted to be with a wreck like her.

"When I was about seven my mom died of Lupus, about the time she got sick my dad had started drinking, but after her death he would drink a lot, at first he just locked himself in his room, after a couple of months he started getting drunk and he would get really mad at any little thing, so he would beat the crap out of me about twice a week." She paused taking a deep breath pondering on those things she knew she had to say, hating every minute of her memories. Jack continued to listen and watched her as she thought, he could understand fully how hard talking and thinking about one's past could be. Seeing as he didn't have such a happy childhood, well not until Evelyn that is. "On my thirteenth birthday he raped me for the first time and continued doing it until I left home to come here"

"Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I did, they investigated numerous times, but my dad is a very powerful lawyer in Chicago Jack, the investigations were light and always ended up with my dad paying or doing favors, and the judge ruling that I needed psychiatric help..."

They spent the rest of the afternoon getting to know one another, each telling the other about the terrors of their past and reaching a mutual understanding.

They were both surprised at how easy it came to trust each other, how natural it felt to sit hand in hand telling stories.

That night they promised each other that no one would ever hurt them again.