Chapter two: Breaking

He walked; Kate still tucked in his arms, out of the cage and towards the enclosure, the only direction he knew- to where they had been working for the past few days. His thoughts immediately darted to the day he had kissed her, how he hadn't been able to stop himself, how he had just needed to feel her skin under his, her lips pressed firmly onto his own, and his hands on her. Watching her raise the pick once more he had seen how damaged she was. She had looked so lost, so exhausted.

He looked at the broken form in his arms, just like now. Stopping his determined march he stared at her for a few more seconds. They couldn't go on like this. He quickly scouted out for a place to rest, they needed to be undercover- jack had guaranteed them an hour but what was he really gonna do? He was in a theatre, and you couldn't second guess these bastards.

Finally Sawyer spotted a cluster of branches hanging firmly from the trunk of an elderly tree; all intertwined creating a semi covered cave-type structure, like the one on their island. 'Oh' sawyer thought with remembrance, he'd almost forgotten that they were on their very own Alcatraz for a minute there. And how the hell was he going to get them off? Could they find a boat, a sub?

That could wait he told himself, all that mattered was snapping Kate out of this trance. She needed to see that what she did was right. Necessary for survival. He tried to put her on the ground, remove her arms from his neck but she had them locked in place. A death grip. She had her body on the floor now, but still she was clinging to him refusing to loosen her grip.

"You tranna choke me freckles?" Sawyer drawled trying to put up the visage of mischief; instead he must have come across as accusing he thought, because she dropped her arms almost immediately.

"Well if you wanna keep your hands on me-"

"Sorry" she interrupted him, shrugging his comment off, turning her back on him and facing the foliage surrounding their newly found 'shelter'.

"You ain't got anything to be sorry for. You can wrap your pretty little self around me any time you like" he smirked, trying desperately now to lighten her mood. Nervously he sat next to her laying form staring at her back willing her to face him. He'd do anything to see her flicker a smile, to know that she hadn't completely fallen apart. That she was still in there. That the Kate he had come to love wasn't gone forever- not to save him.

Not because of him.

Kate didn't want to let go. Ever. She was happy in his arms, moving through the jungle. With her head on his chest she could hear his heart beat and that was the only thing she needed. Not water, not rest, not the psycho-analysis she knew she was in for; just to know that he was still with her. That neither of them had run. Only he had hadn't he, he was going to DIE. And in the end that's the ultimate running, running from life itself. He was willing to leave her here completely alone and it angered her more than anything. She knew why he'd done it; he wanted to keep her safe, keep her alive and living but if he couldn't see that without him that she couldn't handle this, then he was blinder than she thought. How dare he contemplate leaving her. She dropped her arms from his neck.

"You tranna choke me freckles?" He'd like that wouldn't he.

Sawyer couldn't take this any more. It was driving him insane. She was just lying there, she hadn't moved - she wasn't asleep he could tell that from her breathing, but still she just laid there. He stood and made his way to the edge of the enclosure, looking out; needing a new view. Then she spoke. Just a few words, and barely above a whisper, but she spoke. She's not completely broken then Sawyer thought with the highest feelings of relief.

"I thought I lost you"

"Told ya before feckless, I ain't going anywhere" he spoke equally as soft, soothing her with his words but also wanting her to know that he was here for her. No matter what.

"That right?" she said with her disbelief visible as she slowly raised herself to his level from the earth.

"I said it didn't I"

"Oh. Yea, course. And YOU; you're just so trustworthy" She said mockingly "So how were you planning to stay when you were dead?" She was pissed. He looked in her eyes and saw hurt. He didn't understand this "I told you sawyer. Not to give in, to fight." Tears threatened to spill in her eyes "how could you do that to me?"

"What was I supposed to do? Let him kill you? That wasn't gonna happen sweetheart" he moved closer to her, close enough to reach out, touch her. But she'd reject him- he knew it. And he wasn't sure if he could take that.

"What and to watch you die was better was it?" she was almost shouting. She'd moved her body closer to his. He could feel her warm breath on his face, teasing. A reminder of the happiness shared only hours ago "was it?"

"Of course it was. It came down to a simple choice; you or me, live or die. And hell, that was no choice at all" he looked her in the eyes, trying to gage a response but she was unreadable, breaking eye contact she moved over to the trunk of the tree looking at the ground. "What's this about freckles?" How could she be so ungrateful? He had shown her how much he felt for her. He was going to pay the highest price for her life. And he paid it gladly; so long as he knew she'd be able to get free once he was done and he did- he did know. Cause he had faith in her. He'd always known what she was from the moment he met her; strong, fierce, wild and filled to the brim with passion. "I've known girls like you"- that was a lie. He'd never known anyone like her. Now he knew her though, knew her spirit and he had faith in that. Apparently she had non in him though. And that broke his heart, he had thought for the first time that he had found the one who would understand him, be able to look past his self hatred and pain and see his inner humanity and his loyalties, to show him how to feel without hate. He thought she was that one. Now he knew he was wrong.

"Look Kate, last night –"she spun round at this, still avoiding eye contact "It happened, how about we just leave it at that", so that's how he really felt? Despite everything he wasn't willing to open his heart to her. Could he not see why she was angry? That the thought of a life without him, just wasn't life at all. That he was her reason for being, her reason to stay. We'll she'd be damned if she was gonna force him.

"Well that's that then"

"Yeah"

A memory that had seemed so distant stirred in both now, another exchange where together so much was left unsaid because neither was brave enough. So they both stayed put. Simply sitting there; separated, regretting- heartbroken.