A girl with the color hair that was seemingly the intermediate shade between red and blue set the blender in its slot and pressed the button for crushing ice angrily. The constricting coffee scent around them was almost palpable with her irritation, the bangs that covered the purple eye swinging as she swiveled her body to stare the artificial half-ghoul in the face.
"Stop bringing her up. It's obnoxious!"
Her eye is convulsing in aggravation, glaring strikingly at the lean dark-haired boy with the preference of wearing those plaid vests. She'd known him since she arrived at Anteiku, and even then Kaneki thought she's never looked this irritated.
Kaneki couldn't help but pounce back a bit with reverberation, greyish-green olive eyes wide with shock. What was she talking about..? He'd just asked her if Hinami and him could go to the library together to get a new book.
"Touka-chan?.."
Touka revolves back around to the noisy contraption, jamming the button mercilessly for it to stop. She removes the full blender from its place and begins making a frappe for an awaiting customer. Her voice is thunderous with a hint of hidden jealousy, resulting in purloining some attention from nearby patrons. Looks like they had some sort of audience.
"Rize or whatever. You wouldn't stop muttering the damn name! I'm not ready for vexatious things like that this early. Who is that, anyway?"
Kaneki freezed, paling. His mouth opened to say something, forming around a failed reply. Nothing. He promptly looked away, bemused. He didn't understand, as if his brain short-circuited and needed to be rebooted. He'd been muttering that...?
The half-ghoul pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes until he saw nothing but sparkles, one hand falling onto the table limply. Touka catches his fingers twitching out of the corner of her eye and swivels her hips to give him a questioning glance. "Kaneki?"
He reflected on his mortal life, knowing that it would all be gone soon. Ever since he found out he was a ghoul.. He was born that way. And his sister, his damn sister didn't even tell him!
He never understood as a child why he had to wear hoodies all the time, an eye patch, dare not eat in public. They never stopped at those cool restaurants Hide suggested and the boy never knew why. Until Yoshimura admitted the fact to him at age seven.
"Kaneki, you are not like the other kids. You don't eat what they do. You eat them. We must, Kaneki. We are ghouls. We kill to live."
He remembers the old man's words, how he didn't want to believe it. He couldn't understand. Of course, how could he have? Someone telling you that your sister including yourself were ghouls. Monsters. Oh, yeah, to make things better, everyone at this coffee shop is a ghoul! Don't worry though, they digest only human flesh, just like you!
His pulse augments, thrumming in his veins, burning. His head began to pound.
Rize.. Why did you leave me all alone? I missed you.. I hate being alone...
Overcome by a sudden flood of emotion, he somehow tunes out his hearing in a way. The only thing his eardrums could make out was a haunting ringing and all the phantom thoughts jogging through his head. The blank, emotionless expression swept over his face as the realization of the moment gradually seeped in.
The unforeseen emptiness seemed to rise behind his eyes, carving him into a hollow shell. Like a caged animal, he sat there, twitching uncontrollably. Paralyzed by the tragic feeling of isolation, he slammed his eyes shut and gazed into fields of nothingness. He gently whispered to himself, "Rize-san.."
Suddenly a mirage of memories come out of the floodgates. Some black and white, others the colors of crushed flowers. He's hidden all the hurt of his family's sudden death so well; until now. He hunches over slightly, possessing a sense of loss so powerful that his mind couldn't cooperate. A tightening of his throat and short intake of breath forecast the explosion of emotion about to make an appearance.
The image of a future shared with a loving sister not to come was too strapping to be kept in check; the tearing at his heart was too compelling and energetic to be accommodated. The vision Kaneki had began to swim in front of him as his eyes filled with hot tears. The water seeps out of his eyes.
In that moment, all the pent-up hysteria and dread of loss was let loose in a paroxysm of choking and sobbing, so solid in it's intensity that it physically disturbed his shoulders in hefty tremors.
A various number of heads turn and goggle muddled at the weeping dark-haired boy, leaving Touka wide-eyed and frozen in place. She stops making the cold drink, the blender full of beige liquid slamming onto the counter. It was obvious that she's hit a nerve. A big one.
In fact, no one's seen Kaneki like this. He's always looked so happy, a beatific vibe seeping from his pores whenever everyone was around. No one, not even Touka thought that he could be in pain, too. His entire family was dead, after all.
A large wave of guilt sweeps over the blue-haired girl and she has to dig her heels into the tiles to keep from moving with its tide. Kaneki, the shyest boy she's known, was now crying in a café full of people. He was sobbing so hard that he couldn't even excuse himself, and from the looks of it, Kaneki was embarrassed.
And it was all because of her.
She had made made the only person at Anteiku with the personality resembling warm hot chocolate and marshmallows on a cold day cry. The person who is sincerely interested in what you are doing and what you have to say, a person who makes time for friends, who puts others first all the time. She could always feel his warmth when she were alone with Kaneki. Heck, he always made people feel welcome and wanted, and never once complained about his life while she herself whined about everything.
And all Touka could do was stand there and watch.
All of a sudden Nishiki pelts through the room from the door in the corner of the room reserved for only the workers, glaring at the girl as he makes his way to Kaneki. He spits at her angrily, "What the hell are you doing, woman? He's having a damn panic attack! Everyone could hear it from the back room."
Hinami, peeks her head out of the threshold of the doorway. There should never be such a harsh look of worry and displeasure on a young child's face.
And yet she still stands there. Everyone's looking now.
Nishiki grabs Kaneki by the shoulder, pulling on it.
"Oi, Kaneki, can you hear me? Let's go."
Kaneki doesn't respond. It only gets worse, really. He's taking in constant long abundances of deep thrashing breathes, inconsolably wracked with the pain of unanswered dreams and painful times. He's hyperventilating.
"God damn it, he's going to pass out if he keeps this up!" The orange-haired male's chin raises to Touka, blaring with indignation. "Don't just stand there!"
And then the black-haired boy stops. His crying silents to small whimpers, breathes melting into sighs of exhaustion. Then he pushes himself back from the table, standing to his feet wobbly. Ignoring Nishiki and Touka who were looking at him in shock, he swipes at his eyes with the back of his hand and runs out of the shop.
