Disclaimer – I own nothing as always.

Warning – Mentions of drugs.

This isn't Love

Chapter 2

Ivan's fist smashed into my jaw. I fell backwards and hit my head on one of the walls of the classroom. I could taste the gushing blood in my mouth. My jaw was stinging and my vision went blurry. I felt a kick in my stomach. Blood sprayed out of my mouth and dripped down my Prussia blue jumper. I felt another blow to my face before I lost consciousness. When I was unconscious I dreamt of a life I never had. I saw my mum and dad happily laughing. I saw my sister playing with her dolls. And I saw myself surrounded by lots and lots of people, friends. I saw myself unharmed, not a single scratch or bruise on me. The people around me were laughing too. But this time not at me, this time people were laughing with me. The sky above me was a bright blue. There wasn't a single cloud and the sun shone brightly. The grass beneath my feet was a deep shade of green, a green I never new even existed. Before I knew it, I was in bed with my little sister. My mum and dad were also by my side. We were happy, sleeping all together as the family we never were. I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to stay in this world forever. Reality was worse than the things we dream, but a dream wasn't forever unlike reality. So I awoke back to the life I knew.

I found myself on a bed with light pink sheets. I looked around this strange new room. There was a big arched window right above my bed which had a pink and blue blind on it. To my right was a bedside table with my phone, house keys and wallet. In front of the desk was my school bag. The walls of the room were a baby pink and were outlined in a pastel blue. There was a mirror right in front of the bed and I saw that my jaw had a purple bruise on it. There were a few cuts on it which looked as if it had been bleeding. Someone must have cleaned it up. I found an icepack to my right; it must have fallen off of my head or something. Suddenly, I felt a sharp sting something from my waist. I lifted up my blood stained top to find a bandage wrapped around that area. The bandage had a red blotch on it. I figured it had been bleeding. I tried to get out of the bed to find out exactly were I was, but I stopped when I saw a certain picture on the table next to me. It was of Liz and Feliks. Feliks was in his girl attire and Liz was wearing a long black dress that fit her figure perfectly. I thought it was Liz's room at first, but then I remembered Feliks' love for girls' things. So maybe it's his room? My question was answered shortly after.

The door to the room opened and Liz and Feliks stood there with a bowl of water and a cloth. They looked surprised to see me there. Almost as surprised when I woke up to find myself lying there.

Feliks smiled and said, "We, like, thought you'd never wake up!"

I looked around, trying to find a clock. I remembered my phone and got it to see the time. It was 5:49. School finished two and 49 minutes ago, and I was asleep the whole time.

"We were so worried when we found you all battered and bruised!" Liz told me, "We couldn't just leave you so Feliks and I brought you to his house"

So it was Feliks's room.

They explained to me that when I didn't show up were we normally met to walk home they got worried. After a while they decided to look for me. Feliks had told Liz that Ivan bullied me and so when she saw him and his cronies coming out of an unused classroom, laughing and wiping blood of his knuckles, she got a bad feeling. She ran in to the classroom to find me unconscious, lying there, bleeding heavily. Liz called Feliks and he ran to the scene. Liz thought of taking me back to my house, but then decided against it since she didn't want to worry my mum and Daina. Feliks suggested taking me back to his place and get me sorted out, so that's what they did. Feliks, pretending to be me, had texted my mum using my phone telling her that I was staying around Feliks's. When they got to his house, Liz offered to stay and help and so they both put my in his bed and got to work. Feliks's dad wasn't home and his mother had died from cervical cancer, so he was home alone. While I was unconscious they did all this for me and I was so grateful that I ended up crying. I had never really experienced this feeling before. No ones ever done so much for me that it felt like a moment worth crying for. Though they took it the wrong way.

"Does you're cuts still hurt?" asked Liz with a worried expression.

I shook my head and fell back on the bed. Feliks laughed at me and then said "Hey, so I guess you're, like, staying round mine tonight"

I looked up at Feliks. He was smiling happily. I forgot that he had told my mum that I was sleeping round his. I guess it was for the best, it'd worry her if she saw me in this state.

"But, like, I'm totally taking the bed. You can so sleep on the floor, yeah?" Feliks pointed at the pink carpet coated floor. Typical Feliks, when someone was dying right besides him, he'd still come first. Liz put her hands on her hips and told Feliks that I should get the bed. She scolded him for being selfish and made him apologise to me. He pouted for a while and fell silent.

There was an awkward silence and I took the time to observe my surroundings. There was a large blue wardrobe on the wall were the mirror was. I wondered what kinds of clothes hid in there. We didn't have a school uniform so we could come in whatever we wanted. Feliks came in wearing something different every time. He didn't always were dresses, but 60% of the time it was some item of girls clothing. There were probably more dresses and costumes in that wardrobe. To the left of the wardrobe was a silver shoe rack. It held a pair of blue high top converses and a pair of pink converse boots. There were a few heels on there and some warn out trainers too. On the walls were pictures that he drew, each one signed with a decorate F for Feliks. The drawings consisted mostly of women wearing a unique dress deigned by Feliks. He had told me a week ago that he wanted to become a fashion designer. He was actually really good. Liz had told me she wanted to work with kids. She wanted to walk in a nursery or something.

It was about half past six in the evening and Feliks had finished making dinner. He often had to make dinner for himself since his dad normally didn't come back until very late. Feliks usually spent this time alone playing some Final Fantasy game on his PS3 or drawing new designs. It must have been quite lonesome for him. I had Daina with me and mum usually came back from work around five. Feliks had told me after his mum died his father become unstable. He'd usually go out to 'work' and end up coming back at 4 in the morning with an alcoholic aroma around him. According to Feliks, his father was getting better. He used to get angry and start shouting a lot at Feliks with no real reason and then ended up breaking down into tears in front of Feliks's feet and say he was sorry. To make himself feel better he'd go out with his friends, most likely to the local pub, and not come back for hours. When he did come back, he was usually around some guys shoulders absolutely wasted. Another thing that Feliks's father did was cook. Not just cook a meal for dinner or something normal, no, he's cook for the whole day, none stop, chugging down cans of vodka. Feliks said he tried to eat it all, so they weren't wasting the food, but there was always too much and so most of it ended up in the bin. When Feliks didn't eat it his father would usually start crying again and drinking too. But as time went by, these habits stopped. The only thing he does now is drink. But Feliks was worried that there was more to just drinking.

"He, like, randomly stopped his habits" Feliks said to me over dinner. I was expecting some traditional Polish dish, but he was in the mood for Italian, so we had spaghetti Bolognese instead. "You, like, totally don't just stop. It takes time"

I nodded and said "I see" with a fork full of spaghetti in my mouth. Honestly, I didn't see where he was going with this story. Maybe his dad was getting through this, maybe Feliks just didn't notice. But Feliks was a very blunt person and usually came to the worst conclusions when it came to these things, so I didn't know why this surprised me so much.

"I think he's on crack"

I chocked on my food. How on earth did Feliks get the idea that his father was doing drugs? Surely that wasn't the case. From what I heard, his father was a respectable man who would never go near anything of the sort. Before Feliks's mother died, his father was always cautious of smokers, drinkers and drug abusers. Feliks's father also looked very well. Well, I couldn't really say that since I've never actually met the man, only seen pictures. Once I stopped choking I looked up at Feliks. I was expecting some worried face that was nearly in tears or something. I was certainly not expecting a chill, bored expression. The way he looked and said the phrase was so nonchalant that it didn't seam human.

"What makes you think that?" was the question I asked. I asked it casually and calmly. Truthfully, I was shouting and lecturing Feliks in my head.

"Well, like, he smells different and his nose is whiter" was the Pole's answer.

He smells different and his nose is whiter. Really Feliks? There are so many other possibilities… well I think there is. His father couldn't be on cocaine. For some reason I was taking it harder than Feliks was. I looked at Feliks again. He had that same bored expression.

"You can't honestly think he's on cocaine?" I asked him, worried what he might reply.

He didn't reply. Feliks sat there for a while, chewing his fork. He had barely touched his food. The fork seemed to be what he was more interested in eating. Feliks looked up at the ceiling and poked his cheek. He sighed then got up taking his plate and glass to the kitchen. We were sitting in the dining room which was straight through the kitchen and you could see the sink from where I was sitting. I saw Feliks put his food in the bin then start washing his dishes. I decided that I had had enough and decided to help Feliks clear up. He told me I didn't need to help, but I insisted, you know, being a good friend and all. But Feliks was Feliks, so I ended up doing most of the work.

After dinner we decided to finish some of our homework. I had finished off my homework yesterday so I didn't have anything to do. Feliks told me I could watch T.V or go on his laptop, but I decided to help him on his media studies homework instead. He had to right down about what is currently popular now and how it's changed due time. It was due in the next day and Feliks hadn't even started.

"Like, this is totally boring" he whined.

I sighed as I watched him roll on his back and start pouting. His arms were crossed on his chest and his legs were bent upwards. He was wearing a crimson tank top and blue jean shorts along with pink leggings. He also wore a button-less pink cardigan and fluffy pink bunny slippers that finished off his outfit. I laughed at him. He looked so innocent and cute pouting on the floor like that. He kind of reminded me of Daina. When we, no, when I finished Feliks's homework we decided to spend the rest of the time on his laptop. It was eight, so we had plenty of time before bed. Feliks usually went to bed at around 10. He said that if he got less than eight hours of sleep, he get's really cranky. That was okay with me since I went to sleep around the same time. The next to hours were spent on YouTube looking at random stuff. The two hours went by pretty fast. Feliks got changed into his pyjamas, actually, he wore a baby blue nightdress. I suddenly realised that I didn't have my clothes or tooth brush along with me, other than my school uniform. I told Feliks this and he laughed. He told me not to worry and he had it all sorted. I could borrow one of his pyjamas and he had lots of spare toothbrushes. I looked at what Feliks was wearing, wondering if I had to wear that too. I was pretty relived when he handed me normal male pyjamas. I got changed and washed up. When I got to Feliks's room, I saw a mattress on the floor with sheets and two pillows on it. Feliks was also sitting on it along with the book 'To Kill a Mockingbird'. He smiled at me and winked at me, beckoning me to his side. I walked slowly to him. Feliks pointed to his bed and said that I was to sleep there. I smiled and thanked him for all he's done. Feliks brushed it off as though I was normal for him to invite and look after injured people. After a while he fell asleep. This was the quietist he'd ever been and was quite unnatural for him. It seemed quite strange for there to be silence. I watched him for a while sleeping. He looked so sweet and childlike that I couldn't help smiling. I soon got tired and fell asleep. When I was asleep, I had that dream again. The one were I lived a life of joy and bliss. But this time, I wanted to wake up; I wanted to see the people in the real world, because there were people in the real world that wanted to see me.

At about 4 in the morning I heard a strange thudding noise. It was coming from the front door. I heard a gruff, deep voice coming from downstairs. There was a smashing noise and a lot of swearing. It must have been Feliks's dad. I didn't think much of it since Feliks said this was normal. So I went back to sleep. A few moments later, or what felt like a few moments, I felt something next to me. I looked to my left and saw a certain blonde boy next to me. I wandered what he was doing there. He turned to me and I saw that he was crying. I asked him what was wrong. After a minute he replied.

"I don't like being alone"

I cuddled up next to him and he silently wept into the pillow. And that's all I could remember of that night.

"I don't like being alone either Feliks".

That's it for Chapter 2, please review:)