Although the entire notion of a host club appeared to be morally deviant, Masami gradually grew accustomed to the idea. Accustomed perhaps was not the term that best illustrated her feelings, sunk better described her perspective on the matter. The lack of scruples in the idea of a host club had merely sunk to the depths of her triage. What worried her more were the hosts themselves, their ever so shocking dispositions and unconventional ways.
For example it irked Masami the way Tamaki assaulted Haruhi on an hourly basis, sexual or otherwise, how Honey stuffed himself on cake and still maintained the figure of a prepubescent child and even the fact Mori hardly spoke a word, as if some ominous lurking sociopath. Although possibly Masami was just passing judgment too quickly, maybe physical harassment in Tamaki's and Haruhi's case was the basis on which their relationship was developed, maybe Honey merely had a high metabolism, even though he ate more than half his weight in baked goods daily, and perhaps Mori could just have a lack of social skills…perhaps? Masami shook her head to rid of the thoughts and made her way to the abandoned music room, as she did everyday after school. The large pearly doors creaked as she opened them.
"Welcome our new best friend!" hollered Tamaki as she entered the room.
He leapt across the marble floors to embrace Masami. "Come here you!"
His arms tightly wrapped around her body, squeezing her as a boa constrictor does to slay it next meal.
"Gah, gah." Cried Masami as she gasped for precious air. She calculated if she did not get a breath of air in the next minute she would die of hypoxia. In an act of desperation Masami then ardently kicked Tamaki in his nut sack, the most vulnerable region on a man. She had watched more than her share of action films and had executed the defense move to pristine ninja perfection, but something felt wrong. Conceivably it was the fact she didn't take into account that it was lethal and possibly could affect Tamaki senpai's potential to reproduce offspring one day.
"Ahhgggggg!" screeched Tamaki. He then rolled about on the floor screaming, in fervent spurts of agony. Masami in shock ran out the doors to flee from the doomed situation. Her rapid strides could be heard down the seemingly echoic hallway.
The host club then meandered to the spectacle.
"Well, it was inevitable I guess." observed Karou.
"Yeah, I mean he had it coming to him." replied Hikarou scratching his head.
"Who's going to help Tamaki?" questioned Honey.
"How about you Karou?" suggested Mori.
"No way! I'm not going to fondle his balls until they magically feel better! Who knows where they've been?" he yelled.
"Hey stop it you demonic doppelganger! My balls are perfectly clean! I'll have you know they haven't been anywhere!" retorted Tamaki, laying helpless on the floor.
"So you're a virgin." observed Karou.
"Nooooo! Am not am not!" shouted Tamaki. He shook he pounded the floor in frustration.
Suddenly Kyoya interjected. "I think this matter is over Tamaki and Karou. Karou you don't have to touch Tamaki's scrotum."
Karou looked in relief and sighed.
Kyoya continued. "However the choice is obvious…Haruhi must fulfill her entitled duties as his girlfriend, and well how shall I put this…touch it." He smiled to decrease the tension.
Haruhi looked at Kyoya in horror.
"What? No I'm not going to- No I can't it's too-I mean." Replied Haruhi embarrassed. Her face twisted into a bright red.
"Aww! Harhui you look just like a strawberry!" squeaked Honey. Haruhi put her hand in Honey's face as if to say "not right now."
"Just be gentle Haruhi…" replied Tamaki sensitively. His hand flopped onto this forehead dramatically.
"It's appears it's the only option Harhui. If we go to the nurse she'll suspect something and report to the administrators, some of which include the likes of Tamaki's father. Inevitably the Host Club will be discontinued with your debt still unpaid. It's really your decision. However you will be rewarded for your efforts if you do decide, which will include an offer to exempt a third of your debt if you do the deed. I always keep my promises," replied Kyoya coolly.
Haruhi realizing her doomed the nature of the decision, approached the suffering Tamaki. The walk towards his writhing body was hesitant and unhurried. Haruhi then knelt before him and gradually shifted her hand nearer and nearer towards his scrotal region. She closed her eyes as if to dampen te overall experience of the issue. Her shaking hands nearly brushed over the slight bulge of fabric when Masami quickly shouted.
"Don't Haruhi! He isn't actually hurt!"
The Host club looked at the resurfaced presence of Masami.
"What do you mean not hurt?" said a slightly stunned Haruhi kneeling above the lying body of Tamaki. She slowly glanced at Tamaki suspiciously.
"He has a-a jock strap on! He may have felt initial pain but nothing to the extent he is reciprocating." reasoned Masami.
"What! You don't know, you-you don't even have proof!" shouted Tamaki.
In a small plastic bag Masami revealed a white torn jockstrap.
"I spotted it 10 minutes after I left the room to apologize; it was near the entrance of the room. Custodians usually make 15 minute rounds to check on the hygiene of the school hallways, that jock strap must have been freshly discarded. That's when I strung the evidence together that you must have took it off during your quite convincing episode. and succumbed to the conclusion it was yours! I did some simple forensics tests to verify my hypothesis and now the only thing I'm sorry for is that I ever was!" bellowed Masami.
Haruhi looked at Tamaki in rage. The look was truly terrifying and embraced the very object of contempt.
"Haruhi…don't look at me like that…" winced Tamaki
"YOU PERVERT!" yelled Haruhi abruptly!
Tamaki then quickly got off the ground and ran for his life out into the halls. The host club could have sworn the sound of cracked bones and spilt blood.
"You know as much as the host club seems unusual and all…I think I've somehow grown truly accustomed to all your abnormal antics. I guess that's the first time I've ever sort of had fun…" spoke Masami. (The chase between Tamaki and Haruhi had stopped hours ago)
She reached over to sip tea that had been prepared. "I'm sorry that sort of just slipped out. I mean it wasn't fun but it was fun," she said awkwardly.
"Ha. It mean sort of takes awhile to get used to, but in the end it's really…worth it. What they do may seem weird and all, but down to the core their good people," smiled Harhui.
"I guess we could learn to live with you too Masami…just kidding!" shouted Karou and Hikarou.
Kyoya shifted in his seat and blushed as he picked at his cake.
"Masami and Harhui will you please forgive me?" pleaded Tamaki. He entered the room meekly. (as he had just returned from changing his uniform)
Masami looked absently down into her cup of steaming tea and Harhui continued to eat her strawberry cake. A broken look crossed Tamaki's face.
"Only if you'll accept our punishment." replied Masami after the brief pause.
"Of course."
Masami and Harhui whispered quickly into each other's ears and shook their heads when they had reached a conclusion. They then began to run towards him quickly and tightly squeezed Tamaki as hard as possible.
"GAH." Squeaked Tamaki.
