2.
Danny awoke the next morning and smelt something like vanillia. Eyes still closed he broke into a huge smile, as he remembered.
Hed knocked on her door, with his heart in his mouth, and when she finally opened the door, shed thrown him a very hostile look.
"I´m not in the mood for another argument, Danny."
"I´m not here to argue."
"Youre so better not," shed mumbled as she walked away, leaving it to him to close the door.
He sat down on the couch next to her. The same couch everything had started some months ago.
Both were staring at the ground, like schoolkids on a first date.
"Listen, I´m sorry.."
"Huh?" Lindsay looked up in surprise.
"I´m sorry," he repeated, but kept avoiding her eyes. To apologize had never been easy for him.
"I´m sorry, that I was such a yerk, I never meant to freak out, about what you did. But I was scared."
"Its my job, Danny. But I.."
"I know," he interrupted her, "I know. It was just.. I was just.. I was afraid. I just.. I felt helpless, Linds."
He looked up again, and met brown eyes that were touched and furious in equal measures.
"Youre not used to it, isnt it? I´m sorry, but I´m so not one of those girl you used to date before.
I dont need you, to protect my. I can look after myself very well."
"Sure," Danny felt a new wave of anger rush in ," And thats why you had to go in there, an nearly got yourself killed. To prove that Lindsay Monroe from Montana is tough."
Lindsay remained calm. She took a deep breath and walked over to the window.
"Okay Messer, "she said in a calm but trembling voice," I was a plain officer, in Bozeman, back then. I was the youngest within the team, the rookie, so to say. One day someone tried and failed to rob one of the banks. They raised an alarm and he had to fled. He tried to hide in the local kindergarten and took serval kids for hostage. The girl, that was meant to look after them, suffered a mental breakdown, and he asked for a replacement. To keep those kids quiet and all. A woman from Helena was flown in with a helicopter. Someone whod done this before, someone who was trained, you know. Over a wire we could hear what was happening inside. As soon, as she steped in, one of the kids freaked out, because, she wasnt the person shed been annouced for. We could hear shots and screaming and went in.
Five children were dead by then, two more died in the hospital. A lot of them got badly injured. That woman from Helena, well, we found her on the floor, a single shot straight in the head.
One of the kids that died that day, was the daughter of a friend of mine. I thought that I should be the one to pass the sad news to her. She was so eerie quiet and all. Later that night, the local priest let her into the church, because she told him, she wanted to pray. He was the last to see her alive, while she was kneeling in front of the altar. After he left her alone, she broke into the belfry, climbed the stairs and jumbed."
Her voice had gotten more and more heavy with tears, while shed been speaking. Danny stood right behind her, and when he felt, that shed finished her story, he pulled her into his arms.
"Theres no day," she went on, "when I´m not thinking, that it should have been me. The one that walked in there, you know. They were used to me, I taught them traffic lessons. They would have trusted me."
"But that wasnt your decision," he placed a little kiss on the top of her head, "So, thats the reason."
She nodded silently.
"It´s okay, but no more secrets."
She nodded again and turned around to rest her head at his chest.
"This is serious Lindsay, serious to me. I want to be with you and I want to be part of your life. With all the good and bad that means."
"What makes you so sure," she mumbled against his chest.
"Mac."
Lindsay looked at him thunderstruck.
"Mac?"
"He took me to Ground Zero tonight. He gave me a speech about notworshipping what I have. I think it was the first time since 9/11 that he talked to me about Claire."
"You met her?"
This time it was his turn to nod silently.
"Danny, " Lindsay said with a sigh, "I dont need you, to protect me.."
His eyes met hers, she could see fright in them.
"..but I do need you to love me."
And now, he was here. Eyes still closed and with her curled up on his side again.
He opened his eyes very slowly.
"Montana?"
"Wa-na-sleep" she grumbled and pulled the blanket a bit tighter arround herself.
"Montana?!"
"Thats unfair!"
Finally she gave in and opened her eyes just a little bit.
Danny smiled.
"Whats unfair."
"First you keep me up all night, and believe me,I can feel every single muscle, and it hurts. And now youre waking me at .."she looked arround in the still dark room,"..arrgh..even before dawn!"
She tried to looked pissed, but could barely hide a little smile.
"Just need to tell you something."
"Well, lets hope its something good," she mumbled and closed her eyes again.
She snuggled a bit deeper into his embrace.
"I love you."
She smiled.
"Love you,too... And now, for Gods sake, let me sleep!"
