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Chapter 2

Love is for Losers

I came back into the restaurant, trying to hold back my tears as I went back to the booth to find Rube sitting by his lonesome, the rest of my happy little family had left.

"You're going to be late for work," he said as I slid in across from him.

"Looks that way," I replied as I lowered my head to the table.

"You want to talk about it?" Rube asked and I looked up to try and gauge the expression on his face. He didn't seem mad, just concerned.

"There's nothing to talk about – it's a done deal."

"What is?" He asked.

"That thing with what's his face, it was a mistake from the beginning."

"Well, now you know…" He reached across the table and handed me the bill and some money. "Now go pay these nice people and get to that job of yours."

I nodded, took the cash and stood.

"Yeah, I better go… later Rube."

He gave me a jaunty wave.

"Smile a little will you, peanut…peach of morning."

"Peach of a morning," I grumbled as I set off for another day at Happy Times.

I was in a foul mood most of the day, in fact, I was even more snippy with my co-workers then usual.

What was the point of my life, unlife – whatever the powers that might be would call it. Whatever, it was it sucked.

It was after lunch and my patience as well as whatever sunny good mood, I had been trying desperately to cling to were wearing quite thin.

I was standing in the break room, making some green tea and trying to think Zen thoughts when Deloris, my ever cheerful ever so loopy boss made her entrance.

"I need to talk with you, Millie," she said as I turned to greet her.

"What's up," I replied absently as I turned back to my tea.

"Are you alright, you seem well – wound up."

"Bad weekend, I guess," I said discarding my tea bag.

"You're just not yourself today," she said, inwardly I thought, yeah no shit.

To her, "Gee – I don't know Deloris, I-…"

I was sure if I played my cards right I could get the rest of the day out of her.

"Is it a boy?" she said nailing it.

I grimaced and nodded.

"Yeah, well it's a long story and –"

She shushed me with a finger and then pulled me into her perfume heavy bosom.

"I know – how it is, oh Millie – it's nothing but a flesh market out there – and men, well there butchers, you know – just butchers," she shuddered at the word.

She pulled me back by the shoulders and shook her head.

"You go home…"

"Deloris," I started protesting but she was hearing none of it.

"No – no I insist, go home – pamper yourself…you deserve it."

"Thanks Deloris," I said as I tossed my green tea in the trash, I mean who needed Zen when you had a free afternoon off of work.

"Don't mention it," she said waving me off.

I was at the door when she called back to me.

"Millie."

"Yes, Deloris?"

"Stay strong," she said by way of goodbye, her fist clenched righteously.

I forced a grin.

"You know it," I said as I beat a hasty retreat to my desk, where grabbing my bag and shutting down my computer monitor, I made a mad dash out of the office and to the start of my Trip- free afternoon or so I wanted to convince myself.

Yet, I spent my bus ride home thinking of nothing but… boys, I could choke the whole lot of them.

I got home to find Mason happily lying on the couch, watching some inane game show and shouting out nothing but wrong answers.

I threw my purse on the couch and sat down next to him. There was a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels on the table.

"Your home early," he said.

"Yeah, well it's been a shitty day," I replied, throwing my head back against the couch with an exasperated sigh.

Mason reached over and handed me the bottle, nudged my hand with it.

"Well, then have a drink with me?"

I shook my head.

"Suit yourself," he said, taking a nice healthy slug for himself.

"Jesus, it's only three in the afternoon," I said shaking my head at him.

"Its 5 o'clock somewhere," he answered, taking another sip and putting the bottle back on the coffee table.

"Mason," I started… wondering why in the hell I was asking him of all people for anything.

"I need some help," I finally said and he looked at me and saw that I was fighting back tears.

"It's that Trip person, isn't it?"

I nodded and started to cry feeling like a big fucking loser but Mason was sweet when he wanted to be.

"Oh, shit – don't cry Georgie, men – the whole bloody lot of us – were awful things…"

He gave me a hug and I hugged back, sometimes Mason was the only guy worth knowing as far as I was concerned. He may be a drunk and a bit of a fuck up but he was always there for me.

"I don't know what to do," I told him as I pulled away from him and wiped both tears and snot from my face.

He handed me the bottle and this time, I took a nice big slug of it – gulped it down and took another.

I handed it back to him.

"Shit, that tastes awful… what is it fucking piss?"

"Good old J.D," he said with a grin.

"It still tastes like piss," I said and with a grimace added, "or worse."

Mason was genuinely curious, "What's worse then drinking piss?"

"Men," I said bitterly, a pause.

"He asked me out Mason, came and apologized and said all this fucking shit and I don't know what to do… what should I do?"

He was at a loss.

"Fuck sake, Georgie girl – I know fuck all when it comes to relationships and all that – but if you like, I will kick his ass… I kick righteous ass if I do say so myself…"

I smiled and gave his shoulder a little rub.

"That's sweet but no – I need some real advice… should I see him again?"

"Did he like really apologize?" Mason asked and I nodded.

"He seemed sincere but what good does any of this do – I mean fucking seriously… it's not like were going to get married and have babies and all that shit."

Mason nodded.

"Yeah," he said thoughtfully.

I reached for the bottle again and took another sip… I was starting to feel a little drunk.

"I got an idea," he said after a moment and another sip from the bottle that the two of us were managing to finish quite nicely.

"What?" I said.

"You should talk to Daisy about this?"
I nearly gagged.

"Why in the fuck would I talk to her about anything?"

"Well, she knows a lot about these thing – you know men and all…"

"That's because she's a slut, Mason…"

Mason turned kind of red.

"Aw, Georgie don't say that – she isn't ya know…"

"A slut," I said.

"Yeah, that – okay, besides I think she can help."

I knew that Mason had a thing for Daisy – a big, bad thing, so I shut up.

"You're right; I didn't mean to sound like an asshole," I offered and he brightened.

"Come on," He said grabbing my hand and pulling me off the couch.

"Let's go…"

"Where the fuck are we going?" I said as I tried to get my bearings, I was a little dizzy and more then a bit inebriated.

"To talk to Daisy…"

"Mason, how are we even going to find her?"

"I know where she is – she's always there, she should like bloody move in."

He was pulling me towards the door.

I dug my feet in and refused to budge.

"You follow her, don't you?" I said and there was a heavy pause.

He took a deep breath and then nodded.

"Sometimes," he finally answered rather sheepishly.

"Oh Mason," I said feeling sorry for him.

"Don't oh Mason me," He said exasperated.

"Just come on… I think she can figure this out for you…"

We were a pair the two of us…drunk and stupid with love for idiot people.

Love really was for losers.

"Oh fuck it – okay but if she says one snotty thing, I am going to haul off and hit her in her self-righteous face, got it?"

"Booze makes you mean," he said kind of amused.

"Fucking right," I said and smiled.

"Let's go," he chided and I nodded and followed him on our drunken sojourn to find Daisy and whatever little pearls of wisdom she had to offer.