I don't own Red vs Blue or Fallout. All are owned by Rooster Teeth and Bethesda Software
Simmons & Grif
Chapter 2: the Not so Lonesome Road
Simmons?
Yeah?
Ever wonder what we're doing out here in this wasteland?
Grif, I told you a dozen times, this is the adventure setting we've picked. We're doing the events of Fallout New Vegas, Fallout 3 and Fallout 4
Great. And afterwards, we head home right?
Wrong. Afterwards the readers will vote on what game crossover will be next.
Sighs, ok fine. Let's get this over with
That's better! Ok, uh, I think our first Fallout journey is… Lonesome Road
Huh? You're gonna leave me out there with man eating animals, weird creatures, madmen and exploding bombs?
No, dumbass, I'm going with you
But-but that defeats the purpose of why its called Lonesome Road
Well, that's the power of FanFiction Grif. You can basically break all the rules with writing!
Yeah, I guess. Well I know I'm gonna regret this but… let's go in
…
Well, so much for my anticipation
Yeah, I know. Nothing here but sand, wrecked cars, bombs, all kinds of useless lousy junk
Hey-hey, tha-that's a Deathclaw!
You sure? It looks like someone mixed one of the monsters from Gremlins with a big dumb animal
…I think you made it mad Grif
Pfft, yeah right? What's he gonna… AAAAAHHHHH
GRIF! YOU CANT GO BACK! WE GOTTA DO THE WHOLE THING!
SCREW THE WHOLE THING! I WANNA LIVE!
There! See, the thing's dead.
Really?
No, it's still breathing and it's very hungry for an orange flavored Grif nugget
That wasn't even close to being funny
Oh come on Grif, I'm messing with you, like always
Sure you are. Ok let's keep moving
Hey, check it out! The Deathclaw has new guns!
Wow! I immediately take back all my criticisms about this place
….
OK I CHANGED MY MIND I HATE IT HERE
Grif, it's alright! The Tunnelers are dead
Ok, then what the hell are all those squashed shells?
I dunno. Must've been their breeding eggs
Ok, seriously man, NOT funny.
…
Grif?
mmmm….oh yeah Joana, gimme some
Grif?
Ohhh yeah… that's the spot. Right in the Grifball
GRIF YOU LAZY BASTARD GET UP
AAAAAHHH! SARGE! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE?
Surprised? I just made my first of many cameos in this here story! Adios muchachos! And Simmons?
Yes, sir?
Be sure to keep messing with Grif. Oh and next time, make him run through that river up to the Fort bare naked
Ohhh you GOT it, sir.
I can still hear you guys, you know that…
LALALALALLAALA WE'RRREEEEE NOOOOTTTT LIIIISSSTEEENNNINNNNG
….
Ok, we're finally out and now… WHAT THE CRAP?
I think this must be where Ulysses wanted us to go to.
A silo? What the hell's a freaking silo doin way out in the middle of this bum-fudged land?
Seems like Ulysses built it to nuke either the NCR, the Legion or maybe…
What?
…
Simmons, come on what?
US
….ok that was obvious
Yeah, it sure sounded that way
Ok enough monkeying about, we got work to do
Whoa whoa whoa, hold on Grif
What?
You said monkeying about
I did. What's the big importance?
You remember when we got sent into the future and where you, me and Sarge had a secret meeting and…
Mm-hmm. I remember. I also recall you tricking me into investigating on the Blues and that bowling ball
EXCUSE ME? DO I EVEN LOOK LIKE A BOWLING BALL TO YOU KNUCKLEHEADS?
…Andy?
Yes, I'm BACK, beaches! I inhabited ED-E's body so I can "help" you two morons into getting outta here
Great. What do we get?
…you'll see. Now get the lead out, Ulysses doesn't like to be kept waiting
Simmons?
Yeah, man?
Why do I get the feeling we're being followed?
Grif, don't be ridiculous. There's positively NO WAY those natives could've tracked us all the way to Ulysses' temple
Tune into Chapter 3 when we see that for the first time GRIF WAS RIGHT!
