Chapter 2

Olivia lay in bed staring at the ceiling. She didn't know it was possible to simultaneously be amped and exhausted, but here she was too wired to relax and desperate for sleep. Business was thriving and the demand for her attention had been constant and overwhelming. She usually thrived when she was being pulled in multiple directions, but tonight she needed some time to just be and was hoping to get through the night without an emergency call. She'd just started to relax a little when her cell phone began vibrating on her nightstand.

"What?" she answered hastily, frustrated that the sleep she longed for would have to wait.

"Did I wake you?" a familiar, but unwelcome, velvety baritone asked.

Following the evening they'd shared six weeks ago, she was confident he would call or try to see her. She'd been like a teenage girl, flushed with excitement every time her phone rang or someone knocked on her door, but he never called nor did he show up. He made no attempt to contact her outside of their professional interactions. Business had led to her return to the White House, but, even then, their interactions were stilted. He was polite, even warm, but there was a formal tone that had never been present before, even when they were keeping their relationship a secret. A perfect example of this was his insistence on calling her Olivia, never Liv or the far more endearing Livvie. She was concerned at first, but brushed it off, assuming that his changed demeanor was a show for Cyrus and Abby. As the weeks passed, her concern turned to irritation and eventually, unfortunately for him in this moment, she became angry.

"No, I was up," she responded flatly.

"Are you alone?"

"What do you want Fitz?" she spat angrily. It was none of his business if she was alone or not. He forfeited his right to ask that question when he started dating Grace.

"I saw you on TV..."

"You saw me on TV?" she interrupted.

"Yes, the Senator Cunningham press conference."

"Oh, that, I thought I was out of the frame."

"You missed by about 8 inches," he teased. He paused briefly for her response, but all he heard was silence.

He was a little unsettled by Olivia's seemingly cool reception and debated hanging up, but he'd called and she'd answered so he decided to keep talking, hoping to eventually engage her.

"Anyway, I feel a little foolish now, but I saw you on TV and gave into the urge to call."

Olivia understood. It was always a danger for her when she watched the news. She never knew when she would encounter his image or what the media would capture him doing. It was never easy for her to watch him when they were apart, but it was more difficult for her now than it had been when he was married. Seeing him now almost always caused her to physically ache from longing and, more than once, had tempted her to call him.

"I understand," she replied in a whisper.

"You do?"

"Yes, that night, the night I met with Cyrus, I saw you on TV with Grace."

"Oh," he replied, grateful that she couldn't see him when his skin flushed red as the memories of the things they'd done to each that night washed over him. "I wondered what inspired the change."

"You never asked," she remarked snidely, jolting him out of his happy memory.

"What?"

"After that night, you never called, never tried to see me, nothing."

Leave it to Olivia to immediately attack him where he was most vulnerable. After the night they shared, he was full of hope about the positives from their encounter, but as time passed he was overcome by his insecurities about the negatives. Yes, she had openly communicated her love and desire for him, but she also expressed her doubts about their ability to change and opted to leave rather than spend the night with him. Generally, he was the first to reach out to her after a separation, the one to persuade her that they were worth the forgiveness and sacrifice needed to move forward. This time she came to him, but he was uncertain if their reunion was the first step toward reconciliation or her temporarily giving into her physical desires. When she returned to the White House, he searched her words and actions for any indication that she was open to him being part of her life in any way, but, throughout their interactions, she presented as professional and distant. So, he responded to her in kind. Now, he wondered if he read her wrong, if she was simply protecting herself until she was certain of his intentions.

"Liv..."

"It's Liv now? After weeks of only calling me Olivia or not calling me at all?"

He let out an exasperated sigh. This conversation was headed in the wrong direction fast. He didn't call to upset her. Actually, he wasn't fully sure why he called or what he expected from her. He just knew that he missed her and her image on his television reminded him how much he wanted, needed her. So, he gave into weakness and called, a decision he was starting to regret. Eager to change the direction of the phone call and bolstered by her anger about his failure to reach out to her, he decided to be bold and see how she responded.

"Have dinner with me?" he asked.

Olivia physically recoiled from the phone in shock and stared at it in disbelief. She hadn't heard from him in six weeks and, out of the blue, he picks up the phone and asks her to dinner. She didn't know how to respond. She wanted to see him, but not if it was going to be like this, them coming together in a moment of weakness only to retreat to their separate worlds when the moment passed. She didn't have time for random hook-ups, not even with the man she loved. She placed the phone back to her ear, deciding to stall until she understood the motivation behind his invitation.

"What?"

"Have dinner with me."

"What about the press and Grace?"

"Grace is a wonderful woman and she will make someone very happy, but…"

"Someone?" she interrupted again.

"Yes, someone. I only plan to date her for about six months," he stated matter-of-factly.

"Why? Does she know this?"

"Do you really have to ask that question?"

"Am I supposed to know the answer?"

"Liv…"

"Fitz…"

She hoped she knew the answer, but was overcome with a sudden need to hear him say in his voice, his words, that he hadn't given up on her, given up on them. She knew that they were currently in a bad place, that she'd once again left him, but they'd fought their way back to each other through worse, and she needed to know that he believed they could do it again.

"Because I'm unavailable, at least to her. I'm in love with another woman."

"Fitz," she replied, her voice cracking with emotion.

"Let me finish," he continued. "I'm in love with another woman and, although we're not, can't be, together, I'm not ready to date other people."

"Then why are you dating her?"

"Cyrus and Abby pushed me to date her. They said that it looks weak for the President to stay single for too long after being dumped by his very public girlfriend."

Olivia felt a twinge of anger that Abby was encouraging Fitz to move on. She'd suspected that Cyrus was behind the well-orchestrated publicity of Fitz and Grace's relationship, but she didn't expect Abby to support Cyrus's position. She understood that Abby was now professionally tied to Fitz, but couldn't help but feel betrayed by her friend's actions.

"You weren't dumped. We tried…"

"Did we?" he interrupted, his words barely audible. "That night," he paused, trying to decide where to start the conversation about that night. There was so much to say and he had so many questions, but getting Olivia to communicate was always a struggle and he wasn't sure how to proceed without causing her to flee further away from him.

"I understand. You don't have to say it."

"Do you? Because I don't. I don't understand how we became those people. People who could say those things to each other. What changed? How did we become the Fitz and Olivia that stood in that room hurling the worst at each other until there was no way to forgive, no way to stay together?"

Olivia sat in stunned silence. Did he really feel that they couldn't forgive each other for the words exchanged during that fight? He'd once told her there was nothing she could do that he wouldn't forgive. Was that no longer true? The words she angrily spat at him were cruel, but they didn't compare to all he lost that night. She wondered if he would be on the phone with her now if he knew the truth.

The ten seconds of silence that followed his questions were excruciating for Fitz. He knew he shouldn't have pushed her, but he couldn't stop himself. He wanted so badly to understand what happened to them, what led them to this place, and her immediate dismissal of the conversation frustrated him. He knew her well, well enough to know that there was more to that fight than what she expressed. He spent many hours in the months since she moved out analyzing every second of that moment from every angle and he was confident there was something else, something she wasn't telling him and that terrified him. What could be so terrible she couldn't share it with him, even now when she had considerably less to lose? They survived Defiance, Operation Remington, Jerry's death, her kidnapping, and her father. They always found their way back to each other. What could she possibly be holding back now? He loved her, he would always love her. She had to know that, had to understand that he didn't place conditions on his love for her. Still, he knew she was keeping something from him and that worried him.

"You still haven't answered my question."

She knew if she ever wanted to have a future relationship with Fitz, they needed to have this conversation, but she hadn't decided how much of the truth to disclose and she was ill prepared to make that decision now. This wasn't a conversation she wanted to have on the phone, but she was reluctant to push him away when it had taken him so long to reach out to her.

"What question?" she asked tentatively.

Silently conceding defeat, he asked, "Will you have dinner with me?"

Olivia exhaled a breath she didn't realize she was holding, relieved that he'd changed the subject.

"What about Cyrus and the press? I'm sure he doesn't want media coverage of you having dinner with your ex-girlfriend."

He cringed at her use of the phrase ex-girlfriend. It sounded so final and, for him, their relationship wasn't over, their circumstances may have changed, but he never planned to be over Olivia Carolyn Pope.

"Let me worry about Cyrus. We can eat in the residence. If you agree, I'll ask the chef to make the mac and cheese you like."

"The double dutch mac and cheese?" she replied beaming into the phone, her mouth watering at the memory of the first time she shared that dish with Fitz.

"Yes, the double dutch mac and cheese," he responded as he smiled into the phone recalling her very vocal, almost erotic, response to the chef's dish. "Well, will you come?"

"I'm not sure it's a good idea."

"It's a terrible idea, but you should come anyway."

"Fitz…" With that single word, she pleaded with him to stop his pursuit of her and silently willed herself to be strong. They weren't ready, the past five minutes were evidence of this. Still, they both knew she was coming to dinner, the only question was how long would it take for him to wear down her resolve.

"Stop thinking so much. Do you want to have dinner with me? Just dinner, some food, wine, and me. No pressure, just two friends having a quiet dinner."

"Two friends?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows, forgetting for a moment that he couldn't see her.

"Yes or no, Liv?"

"Yes." She hated the control he had over her, the way her heart and mouth betrayed her mind and so eagerly gave into him.

"Yes?"

She laughed softly at his surprise. "Did you want me to say no?"

He loved the sound of her laugh, it was uniquely hers and not something her normally guarded persona displayed easily. It was a symbol that she was letting her walls down, just a little. He knew they could overcome whatever it was between them and believed that her agreeing to dinner was her taking a step toward him.

"No, but I didn't expect you to agree so easily."

"I can withdraw my acceptance if you prefer."

"No, don't, I'll take the yes."

"It's only because you tempted me with the mac and cheese," she teased.

"I would have led with that if I knew it would be so persuasive. I'll check with Charlotte and call you tomorrow to find a date."

"OK," she replied before a loud yawn escaped her lips.

"I should let you go."

"It's getting late."

"One more thing," he said before pausing for dramatic effect.

"Yes?"

"If you plan to make it to dessert, you should wear something a little," he paused to clear his throat, "friendlier than what you wore the last time I saw you."

She delightfully recalled his response when she showed up to Cyrus's office in a black mini-dress, pressing her legs together to quell her body's response to the memory of his touch. "The last time you saw me was in the Oval with Cyrus and Abby," she teased.

"You know what I'm talking about."

"I do," she grinned wickedly, "and I'll try to find something a little more appropriate for our friendly dinner."

He could feel her smiling through the phone and decided to push things just a little.

"I hate it when you're appropriate."

"Mr. President" she replied, tempting him with her sultry tone. "What happened to friends?" she asked in a demure voice, usually reserved for their playtimes.

Fitz flushed at the sound of her voice and groaned as his body began to respond to her teasing. She knew exactly how to push his buttons and he didn't anticipate her sudden change from the cool and cautious Olivia Pope to sexy minx that was toying with him now.

"If you want to keep things friendly, you should hang up now. I won't be responsible for what happens if you continue."

"It was your idea to be friends. Are you changing your mind? Don't want to be my friend anymore?" she pouted into the phone.

"Liv, seriously, stop or I'm coming over."

"Is your little threat supposed to encourage or discourage me?"

"We both know there's nothing little about me and that I don't make threats. Last chance Livvie, hang up now or I won't stop until you're begging me not to stop."

The phone went silent as Olivia contemplated what to do. She knew she should hang up the phone. They were good at distracting each other with sex, ignoring their reality as they lost themselves in each other. They didn't need to be distracted now, not when they had so much ahead of them if they wanted to find their way back to each other. Yes, she started this with her teasing, but she didn't expect him to respond so strongly. On the other hand, she couldn't ignore how her body was responding to his voice. They'd only just started and she could already feel the dampness pooling between her thighs.

"Well, Livvie, what do you want?" he questioned, disrupting her thoughts. "Do you want to sleep or do you want to cum?" he asked in a sexy baritone.

Who was she kidding with her attempts at resistance, she was too wound up now to sleep. The only way she was relaxing tonight was to find her release. The unanswered question was if she was going to let him join her or not.

"Touch yourself for me Livvie."

"I can't," she whined softly, desperately trying to resist him.

"You can. You want to. I can hear it in your voice."

"Fitz, please," she begged.

"You can do it or I'll do it for you. Is that what you want? Do you want me to touch you?"

"I want…"

"What do you want Livvie?" he asked, his voice dripping with sex.

How many times had he asked her this question? It was simple enough for him to ask, but far more difficult for her to answer. She knew what he wanted her to say, and it wouldn't but a dishonest response, but this question was much easier to ask than answer because the range of potential answers were infinite. She paused, seriously contemplating how to respond. There were so many ways to answer that question, some more honest than others.

"I want to feel you inside me," she blurted out.

"You can Livvie. Reach in your top nightstand drawer and get your vibrator."

She smiled, realizing that he'd been snooping in her bedroom. They didn't spend a lot of time at her apartment, and when they were there together she was too distracted by him to worry about him finding her vibrator.

"Don't turn it on yet. Just get it for me."

She pulled opened her drawer and retrieved the vibrator as instructed. She traced the bulbous tip with her fingernail before running her fingers along the protruding silicone vein, wishing it was Fitz's pulsing member in her hand.

"I have it," she responded in a softy, breathy voice, signaling her surrender to him.

"That's a good girl," he cooed. "Now, just relax and let me take care of you."

She swiftly removed her pajamas and underwear, sighing softly as she settled back on her pillow, getting comfortable.

He waited patiently for her to get settled, listening closely for her breathing to slow down, signaling she was ready for him. When he sensed she was ready he said, "I want you naked for me so I can study every inch of your sexy, perfect body."

Olivia's body flushed with heat as she closed her eyes and allowed the memories of the intensity of his gaze to wash over her. She never felt sexier or more desired than she did when he paused his worship of her body to appreciate her physical form.

"My God, you are beautiful. Can you feel my fingers gliding across your skin, as I drag them softy along your thighs, headed up toward you stomach, working my way slowly to your breasts?"

Olivia sighed as she allowed his voice to guide her hands along her body, ignoring the all too familiar ache building between her legs.

"Do you feel my breath on your nipples as I draw one and then the other into my mouth? Do you like it when I lick…suck…and bite your nipples roughly with my teeth?"

Olivia moaned her agreement as her fingers became Fitz's tongue following his instruction to worship her breast, massaging the small globes before twisting and pulling her nipples until were tight little buds.

Fitz listened as Olivia's breathing became ragged with arousal. He could tell she wasn't in the mood for his teasing and suspected she would race forward without him if he didn't move things along.

"Spread your legs for me baby."

Olivia did as he commanded and slowly began to trail her fingers from her breast to her throbbing center.

"I want to taste your pussy. Will you let me taste you?"

"Yes."

"Yes what Olivia?"

"Fuck, Fitz. I want you to lick my pussy."

"Can you feel my tongue drawing little circles on your clit? Pulling your clit into my mouth roughly, flicking your clit with my tongue just the way you like."

Olivia's left hand found her center and easily glided through her moist folds as she slowly massaged her clit. Her breath hitched when the cool metal of the ring that adorned her index finger came in contact with her clit. She moaned loudly with pleasure, wanting Fitz to hear the effect his words were having on her body.

"I'm going to slide a finger inside you. Now two fingers. Are you fucking my hand while I suck on your clit?"

Surrendering completely to his voice, Olivia slowly inserted first one, then another finger into her drenched core.

"I'm so wet. All for you, only for you. You make me feel so fucking good," she panted as she quickened her pace eager to finally find her release.

"Don't cum yet baby, wait for me."

"Fitz," she whined, "Don't stop. I'm so close."

"Patience, baby. I'm going to get you there," he responding, savoring every moment of her pleasure. "God, you taste so fucking good. Do you want to taste yourself? Put your fingers in your mouth, baby. I want to hear you sucking on your fingers."

At this moment, she was so aroused that she would have done anything he asked. She swiftly, but reluctantly removed her fingers from her core and placed them in mouth, exaggerating her movements to make as much noise as possible, painting a picture for Fitz with her sounds.

"Damn, you are so fucking sexy. I want to be inside you when you cum."

Olivia knew immediately what he wanted and reached for her vibrator. She turned it to her favorite setting and held it near the phone so Fitz could hear the buzzing.

"I'm ready baby, are you?" he asked, signaling for her to proceed.

She reached between her legs and slowly inserted the toy, moaning loudly when the base made contact with her clit.

"God, you feel so good. You have the tightest pussy. I can feel your walls grabbing me and pulling me back into you."

Olivia thrust the toy deep inside her before pulling it nearly out and repeating the motion. It wasn't long until her hips were thrashing wildly as her orgasm approached.

"Louder baby. I can't hear you. I want to hear you scream," he softly encouraged her. Sensing she was close, he commanded, "Let go Olivia. Cum for me," hoping to push her over the edge.

She was so close and Fitz's words had pushed her right to the edge. Desperate for friction she needed to find her release, she slid her left hand between her legs and roughly massaged her clit.

"Fuck, Fitz. Shit, I'm coming," she screamed, dropping the phone as the intensity of her orgasm overwhelmed her.

Fitz fell silent and listened to her breathing as she struggled to recover from her orgasm. He wished he could be there with her, claiming her pleasure with his body instead of his words, but knew that their situation was precarious and was grateful for any opening she allowed.

Fully spent and finally relaxed enough to fall asleep, Olivia pulled the covers over her naked body and snuggled down in bed. Suddenly remembering that Fitz was still on the phone, she felt around her bed until she found her phone.

"Goodnight Fitz," she whispered sleepily into the phone.

He smiled brightly, once again amused by how quickly she transitioning to sleep following an orgasm. "Goodnight Liv. I'll call you tomorrow." He held on the line until he heard her snoring softly and added, "I love you," before disconnecting the call.