Chapter 2
A few weeks had gone by since Connie had joined the team for a few drinks and she had barely given Cal a moment to speak to her. He had no idea where he stood with her, all he did know was that he wasn't giving up that quickly.
It was the anniversary of Jeff's death and the whole department were finding it hard today, even Connie. She hadn't spoken about that day much, but instead chose to ignore it completely. The day was dragging by slowly with nobody really being happy. "Right guys, who says that tonight we all ditch this place and have a few drinks… For Jeff?" Everyone looked up and smiled in agreement to Cal's suggestion. He wasn't at the accident, but everyone was involved in this one way or another. For that reason he found himself wandering over towards Connie's office and knocking on the door.
It was a particularly hard day for Dixie who appeared to be taking it out on Iain slightly. "Everything alright Dix? You know we're here for you right." She nodded before jumping back into the ambulance preparing to go to another shout.
Zoe was in her office with Max and Rita. "Have you seen Connie today? You'd think she would show her face a little more, today of all days." Rita was annoyed at the state of the department and lack of management today from the clinical lead but she wasn't about to start an argument over it… not today. "No, I'm going to go check on her in a bit. I think it's affecting her more than she'll admit too."
In the staffroom Charlie, Tess, Robyn and Lofty were sitting down with a cup of tea each. "You know it's hard to believe it's already been a year." Tess looked across at Robyn whose voice shook when she spoke. She rested her hand on top of the younger nurses smiling as they all went quiet again.
Lily had been distracting herself with patients all morning and was refusing to take much of a break. Ethan had noticed and was trying to speak to her. "You know you should really have a break… Just five minutes, clear your head a bit." She looked up but continued on "Thank you but I don't need to clear my head. I'm fine." Ethan shrugged before speaking again. "You know I'm not fine. I don't think Mrs Beauchamp is fine. Dixie and Iain haven't been fine all day, it's okay to not be okay Lily. It was difficult for all of us, especially when we were in the middle of it all."
He could see the tears beginning to form in Lily's eyes. He took the patient notes from her hands. "Go to the staffroom with the other, I'll take over this one for you." She just nodded and smiled a little before leaving for the staffroom.
Cal knocked on the office door quietly before opening it and stepping inside. He walked in and noticed Connie look away wiping at her eyes. "Hey, is everything alright?" Cal closed the door behind him gently before wandering towards her desk. "Everything's fine why wouldn't it be Dr Knight?" She sat at the desk biting at her nail while avoiding eye contact with Cal. He stood the other side of the desk just looking before sitting down opposite her.
"Well, seeing as everything's alright we're all going for a drink tonight-" "I'm not coming out Cal just because you think that something will happen between-" "It's for Jeff. I know you might not care but some of us do and want to remember him." Cal stood up and went for the door not stopping when Connie tried to speak again. "Oh god, I'm sor… Cal… I'm sorry." It didn't matter he had already left the office and closed the door leaving her sitting on her own once again.
The rest of the shift passed slowly before people began finishing and meeting outside the ED. "Are we waiting for anyone else?" Max looked around and was about to answer when Cal walked outside. "Alright guys. Head over, I'll wait here for the others-" Before he finished speaking Ethan walked out with Lily and Tess. Close behind them Connie strolled outside too. "First rounds on me tonight… It's the least I can do to thank everyone after today." Everyone turned and smiled towards the clinical lead before walking towards the pub.
Cal had walked off ahead slightly leaving Connie with Zoe. "I've been meaning to catch you all day, are you alright? It's just I know that it affected you more than you'd like us to think." They walked in silence after this until they got to the entrance of the pub. "Jeff was a good guy and a brilliant paramedic… What happened… I… If I could change it I would in a heartbeat." Zoe rested her hand on Connie's arm offering a warm smile before entering inside.
Everyone raised a glass and toasted to Jeff before settling down at tables and having smaller conversations. Iain was sitting up at the bar when Rita walked up and ordered herself a drink. "Lime and soda please…" she glanced sideways and noticed Iain smiling towards her. "Not like you to be drinking on your own." He smiled and had another mouthful of his drink before ordering another one. "Yet here I am hey."
Iain handed over the money for both his and Rita's drinks. "You didn't have to-" "It's alright I dare say I wanted to." Rita sat down at the bar next to Iain and sat there contently in silence for a while. Connie was sitting at a table by the window on her own while everyone else was grouped together. Cal walked away from the group towards the bar and grabbed himself a drink. He noticed his boss sitting alone staring aimlessly out of the window.
Connie was too engrossed in the window to realise someone walk up to the table. He placed a drink down in-front of her before sitting opposite. "You look like you need it." She turned back to face the man sitting with her before thanking him for the drink. "You know, everyone's been hurting today… For one reason or another and I know you're no different." Connie looked at the older man before having a sip of wine. "Charlie, Jeff should never have died… He did saving us, me. How is that right?"
"You know we could ditch this place…" Rita looked over her glass towards the paramedic sitting inches away from her. This wasn't the first time Rita felt butterflies in her stomach whilst with him, but she was refusing to give into them. "I don't think that would be a good idea right now-" "But it is an idea though." The pair were quiet for a while before Rita made her excuses to leave and head home. It didn't take Iain long to stand up and walk out after her.
"Rita, wait!" She turned around to see Iain walking towards her. "Come on, I mean don't tell me you haven't thought about it." She looked down, her cheeks flushing red. Iain stepped closer moving a strand of hair behind her ear. Rita looked up into his face before she felt herself moving backwards towards the wall. She felt the cold brick against the back of her shirt and before she knew it her hands moved around his neck as he leant in and kissed her.
The music changed quietly in the background making Connie pick up her bags to leave. The day had been long and it was beginning to get too much for the clinical lead. Before she had the opportunity to leave Cal approached the table. "Look, I know you're the cold-hearted boss who doesn't associate with us, but try it sometime… You know we have some brain cells and would understand if things were affecting you too." Connie stopped for a second before picking her bag up and heading to the door. Cal sighed ready to head back to the others when Connie spoke again.
"I'll probably regret this, but are you coming? I don't really fancy sitting round here any longer." Cal picked up his jacket before leaving after Connie. Outside Connie took a deep breath as Cal walked behind her. "Hey, what's wrong?" They began walking before Connie finally spoke. "It should have been me." Cal was lost but when he looked over at Connie and saw the tears in her eyes he knew what she had meant. He stopped and held onto her hands. "Don't ever say that again. What about your job? We all need you, I need you around as annoying as you are. What about your daughter? What would she have done without a mother?"
They sat on a bench for a while and as people passed by Connie just stared blankly on. "Connie, I know you don't particularly like me, that's clear but I am here if you ever need to talk to someone." There was a faint glimpse of a smile on her lips but it soon faded. "You're freezing, put this on." Cal took off his coat and put it around her shoulders before standing up. "Come on, let's get you home." He offered his hand towards Connie to help her up and to his surprise she took it.
They started walking again as Connie reached towards Cal's hand again. He held onto her as they walked the distance towards her house. It was beginning to get dark again and with every minute it got colder. Cal gently wrapped his arm around Connie's shoulders in an attempt to keep her warm. He walked her the whole way turning to face her once they were there. "I meant it earlier, I'm here for you." Connie stood in front of Cal looking up at him. He bent down and placed a kiss on top of her head as she hugged him tight.
"Wait, Cal…" she walked down the steps towards him and through her arms around his neck leaning forward. Her lips collided with his and her returned the kiss. "Not that I'm complaining about what just happened, but I'm going to go because I'll only end up hated even more. You need to get some sleep… I'll see you tomorrow Mrs B." He walked away backwards smiling at her as he went. Connie watched as he walked away, realising she was still in his coat. "Cal, what about your coat-" "I'll get it tomorrow, night!" She turned back to the door smiling and unlocking it before going in and up to bed. All of a sudden she realised just how worn out she was after today.
