HIIIIII

Soda's eyes widened in horror. His own little brother. Jesus, the world is a fucked up place huh? You can't trust anybody. Ponyboy shifted away from everyone very nervously and uncomfortably. He didn't know if they would turn him down or help him through it, he just didn't want to look at them all. When he looked at their faces he saw hate, and guilt, and sadness.

Ponyboy felt like he had made everything worse, and now they hate him. He could mainly tell just by their body movements. Dally looked angry, and he kept fidgeting, and Soda left the room before he started bawling. Ponyboy just didn't care anymore about the rape he just had no clue how his friends would treat him now, he really needed their support. " Why were you on the South side?" Darry asked. He tried to hide the harsh tone but if you really listened which Ponyboy did, you could hear it. But he knew Darry would do this to him it's all he cares about is himself and how bad Ponyboy makes him only one that could be there for him was Johnny. He turned over and looked at Johnny who looked as uncomfortable as himself. " C'mon I can't take this let's go to the lot..." Ponyboy stated walking out quickly. Just before Johnny turned to go with him Darry tugged on his sleeve.

" Just keep an eye on him okay?" Johnny nodded and went after him. Ponyboy hoped he wouldn't run into any socs along the way but, anything was better than staying at home right now. " Hey Johnny, you gotta smoke?" Ponyboy asked grimly. Johnny pulled out his pack and handed it to Ponyboy. "Here keep it.

You need it more than I do.." " Thanks Johnny." When they sat down at the lot Johnny kinda looked a little dour. He bit his tongue for as long as he could but he had to ask. " Hey Pony? You don't have to answer but I just wanna know. What was it like?" Johnny asked looking away suddenly. Ponyboy smiled. " It's fine. Well at that point it felt like he was ripping away everything i rebuilt with Darry and you guys and after my parents.

They only think about themselves. I felt gross. I could feel HIM inside, and I just felt like dying of embarrassment. I tried to be more manly and tough it up, and I tried fighting but, I couldn't move from the position he had me in. The only thing that kept me from crying was thinking of you. I don't know I just thought of you and it somehow made everything easier to deal with, and it still is." Ponyboy finished, leaving off on the biggest non bleak look.

He felt proud of it. " Thanks I guess..." Johnny was a bit creeped out but, at the same time happy he couldn't put his finger on it. He liked the idea of Ponyboy thinking of him while he was having sex, I mean sure it was rape but still. " C'mon Pone I don't think we should be out here for long. If they find you.." Johnny, trailed off. " We just got here though I wanna cool off away from everyone." " And get raped again? Okay fine...Look Pone I just can't stand to see you hurt you're very important to me. Not to mention you're brothers." Johnny had thought he said something smart. Ponyboy smirked. " Right Darry caring? That's funny. He's a selfish bastard is what he is. He cares about himself only." Johnny never knew why Ponyboy and Darry always fought. I guess their just always stressed out, Johnny thought.

Johnny had made Ponyboy agree to go home with him, but again he still avoided everyone's gaze because he kept seeing that same look, Sadness, Anger, doubt, guilt, pain. Ponyboy ran to the bathroom and grabbed a razor, and thought about it for a minute. Death, never seeing Darry Soda Johnny anyone ever again. Was it worth it to escape some pain that would fade away over time? No. So he just slept it off, thinking he'd feel better in the morning. But things just gradually got worse. At school people were giving him dirty looks.

Everyone knows. People were pointing and laughing and whispering. They ALL know now. He felt like shit. Literally a big pile of shit. And that's how people thought of him. He suddenly couldn't breathe anymore, his chest was heaving. He could't get enough oxygen, he felt like he was going to die from oxygen loss. He went to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face taking deep breathes, When he heard the bathroom door slam. " Well well well... Lookie here. It's Bob's little bitch, that stupid little weasel, Curtis." He had , had enough. He plunged at the guy who mocked him and slammed his head against the sink, and his body stiffened. His body lied there lifeless looking. The other guys had run off leaving Ponyboy to the mess. Ponyboy bent over and poked the guy but he just stayed still. He felt his neck for a pulse but, could feel none. Oh SHIT! He was freaking out. He'd just killed someone. Well it kinda felt good. It gave him the exhilarating sensation he needed if he was going to kill Bob too. Bob had taken his relationships with his friends and family away he deserved a lot worse than death. And Ponyboy stood laughing softly, looking straight at the wall, planning his revenge for Bob the soc. XXXXXXXXXXXX

Srry this one was more than likely boring but, I mean I couldn't really think of anything to do, but, I've planned out my next chapter now and it should be more interesting now that he wants Bob dead. PONYBOY THE NEW DEXTER YYYYAAAYYYYY! UPDATE SOON