I heard screams but I was unsure where they were coming from and I couldn't recognize the voice. The only vision I had was blackness but I felt like I had my eyes open but I couldn't be too sure about it, I wasn't sure about anything anymore. It was like I was feeling my body but I couldn't feel it at the same time. Am I dying? That question kept popping up in my head between attacks of a painful burn coursing through me. Then the screams returned and I tried to look beyond the darkness but I couldn't see, I only burned. That's when I felt it, a hand on my arm and I was sure I wasn't dying but the arm was ice cold compared to the burning I felt throughout my entire body. Voices? I heard voices whispering something but I couldn't make out what they were saying. More pain and more burning then more screams. I wasn't sure where I was or even what was happening but I was sure that I was either dying or dreaming but since I should've woken up I was convinced I was dying. But there was so much I had to do and people I had to see and to speak to but I also needed to apologize to my parents for leaving; leaving, that's right. Forks, Alexandra. I couldn't keep my thoughts in a straight line for a moment to even reason what was happening to me. What's this? Another hand but this time it feels warm and not ice cold. Where am I? Is this heaven? Blackness and confusion or am I in Hell? It seemed more like Hell than anything because of the burning and endless pain. What's happening? Then I heard voice again, clearer this time, calling to me. Calling my name. Asking if I'm okay? Why wouldn't I be okay? What happened?
At that moment I tried to speak but nothing came out of my throat, I only heard screams again. Was that me screaming? It couldn't be, that didn't sound like my voice or was it my voice? I'm so confused. I tried to open my eyes again and this time I was able to see but not see, everything was so brilliant and the colors were more vibrate than I have ever seen before in my life. Yep, I'm dead. I tried to force my arm up but it wouldn't move because I still felt a slight burning in my body but my head was now clear from the pain. I looked around the room while I felt like a pig in an oven, I didn't recognize the room and I was sure it wasn't a hospital; it looked more like a house. I closed my eyes once more to see if I could wake up from the dream but when I reopened them it was the same scene.
I more cautiously tried to move my arm and was in shock when it actually moved but the feeling was different, much different. I couldn't understand what was happening but my vision seemed to pick up every single detail of the ceiling I was looking at to the wooden frame where I could see all the splinters and grooves of the wood. I even noticed if I focused I could see the dust floating in the air. When I caught sound of birds and other various animals behind me I turned to note the glass covered wall behind me then I heard sounds of voices coming from below me, at least six of them I heard. It sounded like there were two males talking then four females but I had never heard the voices before so I couldn't make out who the owners were. I sat there for a moment wondering why I felt so different and what in the world had happened, then through a fuzzy haze I remembered the three bullets that entered and exited through my body; suddenly I reached down and lifted the pale color shirt I was wearing but there were no holes, not even a scar like it had never happened or was it just a dream? I was just about to stand up before I was greeted with eight different faces staring at me from the doorway.
"Hello, Courtney." A blonde man spoke first stepping out of the group and walking towards me, "I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen." He introduced himself but the name Cullen rung a distant bell that was locked behind a haze that I couldn't break through.
"I
suppose you would like to know what's happened…" he spoke
softly to me but I was more interested in why this man had a white
light around him, as if someone took a picture and painted a thick
white line around him and it seemed to shimmer as well. I glared at
him for moment before bringing my attention to the other people
standing behind me, I noted the way each body had a different color
around it. There was red, purple, blue, another white, green, black
and silver; I was trying to figure out why I was feeling so calm when
I should be screaming but I pushed that thought aside to focus on the
color and strangely enough I realized I felt like these people
standing before me wanted nothing but good.
Pulling my attention
back to the doctor, I stared at him wide-eyed unsure how to speak in
that moment, I knew something was different but I couldn't think of
a logical thought to piece together, "Yes, please." I sang out
then was shocked when my voice didn't even sound right; it was
beautiful as if I was singing.
"I promise you, everything will
be okay." He assured me before he went on with the explanation to
why I was in their house and why I was seeing colors. "You're not
human anymore, "he spoke carefully but still I was calm, "You
were shot three times and I had found you outside of the store
bleeding to death." He stated as he continued to watch my face for
some sort of reaction; on the inside I was screaming and yelling but
on the outside I was calm due to some strange force.
"I died?"
I asked.
"Well, only half way. You are undead, so to speak."
He paused again watching me, "You are now a vampire." He finally
spit out seeing the confusion across my face.
"Um, vampire?"
then I laughed getting up but I was having a hard time figuring out
my own body so I ended up a little off balance, the doctor came
closer to me and put out his hand in offer to help but I did not pay
him attention. A smaller girl left the room for a moment then
returned holding a huge mirror, almost twice the size of her. She set
it down and looked at me, as if to show me some sort of proof of me
being anything but human, I was completely convinced that I was dead
and some sort of higher power was playing a trick on me. But I was
curious to look anyway, maybe I wouldn't have a reflection and that
would disarray the illusion; so I took a step forward and gazed into
the mirror, nothing was too different. My body was pretty much the
same though it was a little thinner than it was before but I was
still a little bit chunky had I always been, my skin was paler almost
white then I got to my eyes and that's when it happened. I looked
at the red eyes staring back at me and I have to admit it scared me
deeply, I had no clue what was going on and now I was even more
confused than before but when I took a closer look I noticed that it
was my face framing those eyes.
I heard gasps and footsteps on
the floor before I heard the shattering of glass and a loud thud but
I was dazed. The only thing I knew was that I was staring at my face
but now I'm staring up into the grey sky, I was pretty sure that I
had just fell out the window but I didn't feel any pain whatsoever.
The people who were in the room were now in my sight, all crowded
around me on the same ground I was laying on. One of the men, a man
with bronze hair and golden eyes bent down and helped me sit up, "Are
you okay?" he asked in his velvet voice and I nodded slightly then
I looked up at him
"I just fell out of a glass window and it didn't hurt me." I said in mass confusion. The doctor stepped up again and smiled at me, "Vampire." He stated simply as if I was to believe him now.
"They aren't real. Those are stories and mass media garbage." I stated to him as if I was to sway his opinion.
"You were the one who just stated that the fall didn't hurt you." The man sitting next to me stated.
"But I-"I attempted before I was cut off.
"Courtney, it's usually hard to accept it. But feel for your pulse and you have no heartbeat and yet you're still living, are you not?" he raised an eyebrow to me and I focused in on his face and yet, somewhere deep inside of me I knew he was telling the truth and I actually started to believe him for a moment.
"Where am I?" I asked trying to avoid the topic of vampires.
"Forks, Washington." A blonde girl from the group commented, for a second I was taken aback by her beauty but then realized that Forks had a meaning to it. I lived there.
"That's right, I live here! I need to go home…" I stated standing up again but the bronze haired guy stopped me again.
"Your friend thinks you're dead." The one named Carlisle stated. I glanced up at him suddenly remembering my best friend, Alexandra and then I remembered the move to Forks about five short months ago.
I went speechless as they all looked at me. A medium height woman stepped to me, she was beautiful as well but she had more of a motherly look to her. "I'm Esme, and these are Carlisle and I's children for public proposes," she stated turning to point out each of her children as she called them,"That is Rosalie" the blonde, beautiful one. "That is Alice," the small fairy looking girl, "That is Jasper," the dirty blonde who looked like he was focusing really hard, "That is Emmett" the tall, happy looking one, "There is Bella," the quiet one who was in the background "and this," she said putting her hand on the man's arm, "this is Edward." I nodded to her and looked around to them all trying to keep their face with name so I would be able to remember it.
"So, this is real?" I asked looking around to all their faces trying to search out some sort of joke or lie but I couldn't find anything. Edward placed his hand on my shoulder and nodded to me with an apology in his eyes.
"Yes. Welcome to our family." Carlisle had spoken breaking my eye contact away from Edward.
"What about Alexandra?" I asked, I felt like crying at the thought of Alexandra being alone in Forks without me, it was our promise and I felt like I broke it in some crazy way.
"She'll be okay." Esme muttered in her motherly tone but somehow I was not convinced with that theory. I glanced at the family around me feeling alone somehow and a slight burn started in the back of my throat but I ignored it for the moment, I had to get answers.
"So…." I started but was unsure how to ask, "What's going to happen?" I finally asked not even sure if I understood my own question.
"Well,
come inside and try to stay away from the windows, "Carlisle
laughed, "we'll explain everything to you." He placed his hand
on my back and ushered me to the door and then to the dining room
where we all sat, Alice and Jasper were clearly a couple as was
Carlisle and Esme but everyone else kept their distance from one
another like normal siblings would do. I started to analyze the
family and to my shock I read into them more than I thought I would
be able to.
"We'll go on a hunt later on today; you must be
thirsty being a new vampire." Carlisle spoke cutting Alice and
Jasper's small conversation off quickly.
"Hunt? As in kill people?" I asked unsure still searching my fuzzy memory of what knowledge I had of vampires. Carlisle just shook his head and looked to Edward like he didn't want to explain it to me.
"Well, we're different from other vampires; we only feed off the blood of animals. We like to call ourselves 'vegetarians'" he said with a warm smile on his face. Carlisle nodded as if to prove Edward's point but with the word blood ringing my head the burn returned with force.
"What's this burn that I'm feeling?" I asked bringing my hand to my throat and rubbing it a little bit. Rosalie grinned and answered before anyone, "Thirst."
"I said we'd go hunting later." Carlisle said again giving me comfort then continued, "We have a code of secrecy and we can't go out in the sun, we tend to…sparkle." He shuddered a bit but with an amusement on his face.
"I thought vampires die in the sunlight?" I asked pulling more memories from the haze.
"Myth" Edward said coldly, "So is, coffins and sleep." He winked.
I was a little confused with this Edward character, the color around him was black and that sent up a red flag to me that something wasn't right about him but I wasn't even sure why I was seeing colors. "Vampires don't sleep?" I asked a bit confused.
"No, never." He commented, "Our sleep is sort of like hunting, the blood we get is like the energy a human would get from a full night sleep." He explained. I nodded slowly taking all of this in.
"And the colors? " I asked. Everyone looked at me confused by my question but I just looked at them expecting an answer. Edward was the only one who seemed to understand when he spoke to Carlisle, "She is seeing people's auras." He told him. I looked over at Edward in shock.
"Oh, sometimes people have special abilities that are brought to their attention if they're turned into a vampire...Like Alice, she can see the future. And Edward can read minds." He grinned. I started to look through my mind to see what I was thinking for a moment, I hoped that Edward would give me privacy; for the first moment since I woke up I actually felt uncomfortable.
"I'll try and give you privacy as I do with all of them." He answered my worry with a smug look. "Jasper can change emotions." he nodded towards Jasper who continued to look deep in thought.
"Oh, so I am seeing people's auras…." I repeated more to myself than to anyone else. "That is weird. So like, I can read people's personalities and stuff?" I asked again a little more confused.
Edward nodded a bit, "Yeah, sort of. You'll have to discover a little bit more about it though, not all abilities are the same."
I nodded and the rest of the time was spent telling me about how my body works and other vampire rules that I would need to know, such as secrecy and the treaty with the werewolves and every single bit of information I would ever need. I truly couldn't help but stare at Edward, there was something about him that was interesting me deeply but I could not figure it out. He was the only one of the Cullens that had a dark color around him and he was the only one who seemed to be extremely sullen most of the time.
Edward and Carlisle were the ones who accompanied me on the hunt, teaching me how to let go and use my senses and how to use my strength for a meal. Edward had challenged me to a race since being a 'newborn vampire' makes you a little stronger and faster than older vampires, he was curious to see if he'd be able to beat me. Though, I won without even trying he took it with stride and said that one day he'd find a 'newborn' that he could beat. I just shrugged not truly understanding the life of a vampire yet. I did note one thing, the burn after my first hunt didn't truly go away and when I asked I was shocked to find that I was actually craving human blood but they said it would pass and I then wouldn't have a problem with the burning. I kept thinking about why I should stay with the Cullens, if they created me does that mean they have a claim over me? Or could I be free to do what I wish? I was so unsure of the laws and limitations I had with my own freedom, were vampires allowed to be free if they kept out of human sight and knowledge?
I sat by the window getting used to my new vision and testing it out in the night sky, I spotted a bird flying through the trees then an owl sitting there. When I looked to the ground I saw a small field mouse run across the wooded ground and it truly fascinated me to be able to see things I was missing before.
I was shocked when Edward walked up behind me to look at the view I was looking at, "It truly never really gets boring." He muttered taking a step closer to me. I didn't look at him when I responded; I just kept my eyes on the forest.
"Really? I would imagine it would." I said softly. My mind continued to wind with questions.
"You know, you're driving me crazy." He said, frustrated. I turned and looked at him a bit confused.
"I'm sorry?" I was unsure if I should apologize or punch him, I was leaning more towards punching him. I thought that was really rude to someone who was extremely new and shocked to find out she's a vampire leaving all the people she loved behind, especially Alexandra who now had to take care of an apartment by herself along with bills then having to deal with her best friend's 'death'. I glared at him.
"Take it easy!" he said holding his hands up in surrender. "I meant, you have so many questions that you're not asking." He said politely holding onto his charm so that I wouldn't attack him, I guess one thing that came with the 'newborn' vampire trait is that you have an uncontrollable anger and I was figuring that out slowly.
"Oh," I muttered before turning back to the forest's view. "I thought you were going to give me privacy."
"Sorry, it's just you have so many questions and I would like to help you." He said moving a little bit closer to the window and to me. "You're free to do what you like within the laws of the Volturi of course, but we don't have any claims or rights over you. Carlisle and Esme took you in to help and since we're the only vampires around here it would be only right for you to join our family." He explained, answering some of my questions.
"Oh, thank you." I glanced over and gave him a small smile. I was truly grateful for ability at that point because some answers I would never ask.
"Don't feel forced to stay here though." He insisted, his voice caught my attention fully and I turned to look at him, watching the color around him. A word popped into my head randomly and I was unsure why but every time I focused in on his color the same word, 'depression' popped into my mind. "I would like you to stay..." he admitted softly. I knew he was reading what I was thinking and what I was seeing about the color but he didn't comment on it.
"I
will stay" I smiled to him still focusing in on his color but then
he started to get uncomfortable and moved away quickly then
disappeared up the stairs. I heard his door shut and then heard the
soft hum of music from his room. I thought about going up there and
apologizing but I wasn't sure if it was right just yet, but it was
sort of like we were even. I evaded his privacy as he did mine. Alice
bounced into the room with a huge smile on her face, "Hello,
Courtney!" she chirped.
"Hi," I greeted back to her. She
bounced over to my side and looked out into the night, "What are
you looking at?" she asked.
"Just getting used to the new
vision," I responded. She giggled a small giggle then stepped close
to the window coming into my view. I focused in on her color which
was a vibrant purple and the word 'feminine and happy' came into
my mind then with a smile I saw nothing but good in her and that made
me feel comfortable. She stood there for a moment before looking over
at me, "Do you want to go shopping sometime? Get you some clothes
and other items you might need?" she asked whole-heartedly.
"But
I have no money or anything…" I muttered feeling more alone than
I had before. She shook her head then smiled.
"Money is nothing
to us, you're a Cullen now and therefore you are entitled to the
Cullen fortune." She stated happily then I looked over to Carlisle
a little confused and he nodded in agreement with Alice. "Jasper is
out getting your paperwork right now." He added then the confusion
really hit me.
"What do you mean?" I asked not turning my
full attention to her. She just kept her smile and bounced a little
bit with excitement.
"Well, you're getting your new driver's
license, passport, birth certificate and bank account information."
She stated bouncing with excitement.
"Aren't I dead though?
To the humans at least," I was even more confused with the whole
thing now and I was getting more frustrated.
"Well, yes. But
you are not Courtney Guidry anymore." She paused looking at my
reaction, "You're now Courtney Cullen and your funeral will be
held here and no one else knows about your death yet. It was said
that your friend Alexandra that lived with you is going to tell your
family after your burial." She informed me. I looked at her with a
grim look on my face.
"I love how I am having a funeral but all
my family doesn't live here." I snarled. She gave me a
sympathetic look. I turned my face to the forest again trying to
block out reality.
"The state is doing it for the victims for
free." She pulled back a little bit and turned when Jasper walked
through the door. He held an overstuffed folder in his hands but
Alice took it from him before he even got a chance to take a step
over to me. I glanced up at him and his color was green, 'noble'
popped into my head and I felt comfortable with him as well, it
seemed like the only one I didn't really feel comfortable with was
Edward and yet I had to figure that out but before I could give it
another thought, Alice bounced to me and handed me the folder.
"Welcome, Ms. Courtney Cullen." She smiled a huge smile before
bringing me into a hug. I smiled at her and felt like I should cry in
that moment but yet again, nothing. I looked around me and suddenly
all the Cullens were standing looking at me, Carlisle and Esme stood
there proud at their new 'daughter' I suppose, they both had a
white aura and the word 'gentle' came to mind and I smiled at
them with a thank you lingering in my eyes, I felt like I owed
Carlisle everything in that moment. An immortal life is better than
nothing. I looked over to Rosalie who was red with the word "intense"
and she gave me a small smile and I smiled back, Bella was silver but
no word came to mind; I guessed that I was going to have to focus in
more on non-common colors. I looked towards Emmett who was blue and
'energy' popped into my mind then each one came up to hug me
tightly and each welcomed me into the family aside from Edward, who
stood more to the side, I figured it was probably still feeling a
little uncomfortable from me reading into his aura and what seemed to
be a secret.
After
the big welcoming, I went up the room that was put together for me; I
was promised that Esme and Alice would do a huge shopping trip for me
to decorate the room that was now mine and for clothes since I had
none at that current moment in time. I was grateful for this family;
they were like my guardian angels but in vampire form. And now I was
one of them, I was a Cullen but more than that I was a vampire. That
brief thought about immortality kind of excited me for a moment
before I heard someone walk to my door then knocked softly. I stood
up and opened the door thinking it was Alice for a moment I was
shocked to find Edward's face on the other side of my door. I
started at him for a moment before moving aside letting him into the
room, "I am sorry for shocking you." He let a small smile creep
across his face but kept it more hidden than out in the open.
"It's
okay. Alice has just been all over me since we got back from
hunting." I stated sitting back down where I was before the knock
disturbed my thoughts. He smirked and nodded softly, "Yeah, she's
like that."
"So… What are you up to?" I asked trying not
look at him, I wanted to avoid looking at his color, the last thing I
needed was an enemy within the only people I would be allowed to see
for the next year or so. Edward sat down to my surprise again; he
seemed a lot more comfortable to be around me in that moment.
"I
must say I am sorry for my reaction early, no one has really thought
or even spoke about my depression other than Esme but I just block
her out." He muttered not making eye contact with me, like that
would matter, I wouldn't look up at him either.
"Its fine, I
know that must feel like you have no privacy." I risked a glance
over at him and he looked up as well in that moment then I darted my
eyes away quickly.
"No, it's just painful to be reminded of
the state I'm in." Another glance and again, I was
caught.
"Well, I am sorry either way. I didn't mean to offend
you." I looked down at the floor and again was taken aback by the
detail I was able to pick out of the carpet.
"You didn't
offend me, I offended myself." He stated. I looked up at him again
now curious to why he was so depressed. This time I focused in on his
color again, I felt guilty for it but it was hard to resist. This
time another word shown itself inside of my head; 'lonely' and
with that I stopped and pulled my attention elsewhere. He looked up
quickly as if he didn't want me to stop.
"No, it's okay. I
truly don't mind." He said quickly, "It's true I have been
lonely for decades. That's why I am the way I am. It's hard to
deal with. I watch Alice and Jasper so happy then Carlisle and Esme…
I guess I'm just a sucker for love." He spoke with such a great
sadness I wanted to hug him for a moment before I snapped myself back
into reality; he was now my adopted brother and no more. I had to
figure out why I was so interested in this man sitting across from
me. Edward's eyes met mine again and he smiled against his own
will. "Sorry, I didn't mean to lie this on you. You have had a
hard time lately and here I am, telling you my problems." He stated
as he stood up but I stopped him by grabbing his arm.
"No,
it's fine! Believe me; I am grateful for Carlisle and all of you…
I truly am. I can't thank any of you enough for this. It means the
world to me." I chanted quickly so he wouldn't get the wrong
impression of me. Edward nodded slowly not taking his eyes off of
mine
"It's nice to have a new addition to the family. It's
a new person for me to talk to." He smiled a brilliant smile before
leaving my room leaving my door open; I looked over and noticed his
room was right across the hall from mine.
A few moments later I
heard Alice's high pitched laugh then Edward's growl at her, I
was almost tempted to go downstairs to see what the issue was but I
wanted to be alone for a few more moments to get my thoughts and
emotions together. Then I heard Edward's growl again and Alice's
laugh, "It's great, Edward" I heard her hands clapping together
and the floor squeak beneath her as she bounced, I smiled and
wondered what they were talking about again. But it seemed like a
private conversation with their minds since there were no other words
before Alice's that were spoken. I assumed that Alice saw a vision
that made Edward upset but Alice seemed happy over it. The curiosity
grew for a moment before I turned my thoughts back to Alexandra and
how she was holding up.
