My Inner Demon –FMA
Chapter Two: Hearing Voices
"Edward, Alphonse, it's good to see you boys. Been a while since I've heard from you." Pinako put her hands on her hips as she looked up at the boys in front of her on the porch of the Rockbell home. She first made eye contact with Al, who chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his metal neck. She then met Ed's dull, golden eyes. He only looked at her a moment before looking away, concerning her before she could ask what was going on. His face was pale and dark bags were under his eyes. He reminded her of the walking dead. She could see why the military sent him away to get some rest.
"Edward…you're looking shorter…" She mused, hoping to rouse him in any way. He twitched, a vein popping on his forehead, but merely grunted in response before pushing past her to get into the house. She couldn't help but let her jaw drop. Al watched him in surprise as well, unsure of what to say. They followed him in, picking up his suitcase he had left behind. Al sighed and whispered to the old woman,
"He's been like this for almost a month now. I don't know what's happening."
"Don't worry, Al. We'll get him screaming at us again in a few days."
"Ed, Al!" Winry appeared at the top of the stairs, gleaming down at them with star-filled eyes. She ran down, first hugging Al and then rounding on her love. She bounced into his arms and hugged him warmly, bringing a touch of color to his cheeks. "Ed, I missed you." She said into his ear. He brought his arms around her and hugged her back, staring at the wall in front of him.
"I missed you, too Winry." He replied tiredly. She pulled back and gave him a kiss before surveying his face. When she did, a frown spread across her own.
"Ed, what's wrong?" He glanced back at his brother and Pinako and shrugged his shoulders.
"I think I just need to get some sleep. Long ride. Long week." He shuffled past her and went up the stairs, in search of a bed and shut-eye. She let her eyes follow him until he disappeared in his makeshift room, the door closing behind him. She looked back at the others and nodded her head towards the living room.
As they all sat down, Alphonse began to speak. "He's been having a lot of night terrors. He screams something awful when he finally falls asleep. When he wakes up, he's shaking all over and covered in sweat. On the train, he kept grabbing at his chest and wincing like it hurt and he couldn't even stand! All he told me was he had a nightmare."
"How much stress has he been under?" Pinako asked.
"He's been kept in the city on small assignments for a few weeks now because of his declining health. Even the Colonel was afraid to send him out somewhere. His temper was increasing, too. He even started yelling at Lieutenant Hawkeye's dog…"
"When did it all start?" Winry asked next. Alphonse stayed quiet for a moment, thinking about the mission that left Edward in pieces…
. . .
Edward rested his head on the soft pillow and closed his eyes, exhaustion setting in. He pulled the blankets up over his chin and nestled in on himself, trying to curl up as tight as he could. He felt uncomfortable in his own skin, like there wasn't enough room in his body, and he began to toss and turn, gritting his teeth. The darkness behind his closed eyelids began to swirl, turning into a blood red. A shadow appeared, staring at him with devious eyes and a startling smile. It looked as though it had just finished ripping someone apart, its hands dripping with what he presumed to be blood. It cackled, making his skin crawl.
"Edward, dear boy. I'm afraid you've let yourself fall into poor health."
"Shut up." Ed replied. He had been seeing the shadow every night now, and he hated him with everything he had.
"It makes me swell with happiness inside to see you suffering so early in the process." Ed felt his hands suddenly bound behind him and he fell to his knees, everything growing dim around him. He tried to free himself, but the grip was painfully tight and he let slip a small shriek of panic. Footsteps came closer to him and he turned his head away.
"Get away from me, you bastard!"
"I'm not going anywhere. Not as long as I have you." The shadow laughed happily. It reached out to Ed, its sharpened talons scratching his chest and exposing his muscle. Blood poured freely down his body, as well as splattering all over his face and shoulders. He screamed, unable to think beyond the torture he was going through yet again. Another swipe, and bones stuck out from what was left of his flesh. Another swipe, he could feel air hitting his now exposed organs. Another swipe, and another. His body was being torn apart, pieces of himself scattered around him until finally he could see his own mangled heart sitting in front of him, no longer beating. He gave out one final screech of terror before the darkness consumed him.
Ed's eyes opened with a start and he flew out of the bed, the room as dark as the vision that played inside his head. He began to panic, reaching out for something, anything to tell him he was gone from that place. He frantically crawled about the bed, whimpering as he searched, his heart beating rapidly in his chest, flooding out any sounds that might be around him. Without warning, a hand wrapped around his flesh arm and he shrieked, expecting the shadow. "NO!" He shouted, yanking himself free and falling onto the floor with a loud thud.
"Edward! Ed, shhh, its ok!" A calming voice filled his pounding ears and he froze, his mind clinging to the familiar, sweet sound. This time, arms gently wrapped around his chest and a chin nestled in the nape of his neck. He inhaled, the sweet scent of his Winry bring him back to reality. He brought his arms around her and pulled her down to the floor with him, tears leaking out from his eyes. She held him as he silently cried, his body shaking and unable to move. She slowly rocked him, frightened at how vulnerable he was. This isn't the Ed I know. What is happening to him?
"Don't let him rip me apart! Don't let him kill me!" He cried into her ear as his hands tangled themselves in her hair. She held his face in her hands and rested her forehead on his, alarmed at the feverish temperature.
"There's no one else here, Ed. Only me." She reassured him. He continued to cry until he lost consciousness, fatigue overtaking him. She felt him go limp and her own tears spilled over as the door cracked open and Pinako peered in, a horrified look on her face. Winry kissed his forehead. "Granny, help me." She whispered. The old woman came in and took hold of the alchemist's feet and together they hoisted him back on the bed and under the covers. Winry climbed under with him and wrapped her arms around him. Pinako scowled at her, but she ignored her grandmother, only worrying about the terrified Elric. "I'm here, Ed. I'm not going anywhere."
. . .
Ed awoke slowly the next morning, heavily groggy and parched. He lay in the bed with his eyes only half open, trying to figure out where he was. He didn't recognize the wall he was staring at…he blinked, this time focusing more. I'm in Resembool…This is…my room. He felt arms around him and a chest against his back. Winry… He rolled over to face her and studied her face. She was still asleep, her face soft and innocent. Carefully, he reached up to her cheek with his flesh hand, caressing it lovingly. Her blue orbs flitted open and she stretched.
"Ed, you're awake." She yawned. He kept his eyes on hers, feeling strange.
"Yeah." He wanted to hold her close to him and have his way with her, but he didn't understand why. He was too tired for such an act, and he respected her choice in the matter. But a part of him wanted to hold her head down in the mattress as he rode her as hard as he could….
"Ed?" He snapped out of his thoughts and saw her looking at him with a question in her expression. "You ok?"
"I'm ok. What happened last night?" He asked, not remembering her ever coming into the room. She frowned a moment, but quickly replaced it with a smile.
"Nothing. I just wanted to sleep with you." He gave a half-hearted smile for a response and rested his head on her chest.
"Ok." He said. She let her smile falter a moment.
"Why did you get sent here by the military, Edward?" He glared at the pillow her head rested on.
"Damn it, Al." He met her eyes again. "I just…I don't really feel good is all. Nothing that couldn't be fixed in the dorm for a while."
"Don't lie to me, Ed." She stated firmly. He looked at her cross, but backed off at the ferocity she gave off. "Tell me what's going on."
"I-"
Don't say a fucking word. He froze at the sound of the voice in his head, unable to think. Winry caressed his face.
"Well?"
If you speak, I will make you bite off your own tongue. Ed pushed Winry away from him, a coughing fit getting the best of his words. He clutched his throat and choked on air, wheezing and desperately trying to breathe. Winry was at his side in an instant, her hands on his back as she began to panic. He gave one last, large cough, throwing up all over the floor and his arms before becoming dizzy and falling on his stomach. He felt Winry's hands pushing him on his side and holding him in the position. She was calling out for help and he could hear footsteps pounding into the room. His nose picked up the foul scent of the vomit and he wanted to turn away and get out, but he couldn't move. He fought to open his eyes again, pushing towards the light through the darkness that constantly wanted to drag him down, but he didn't want to go back. He didn't want to face the shadow, nor the evil laughter that filled his head.
His eyes flew open once more, but this time he was propped up in a hospital bed downstairs in the automail recovery room. Winry and Pinako were at his side, Alphonse in the corner of the room. He jumped up at the sight of his brother awake and came to his side as well. "Brother, are you ok?" Ed blinked slowly, feeling an IV stuck in his arm.
"I'm a real mess, aren't I?" He croaked, the nasty taste of vomit still in his mouth. Pinako held up a cup of water with a straw to his mouth and he took a drink, thankful to wash away the taste.
"You collapsed this morning. We thought you were gonna choke to death on your own bile. You haven't been eating enough." The old one lectured.
"Not hungry."
"You, not hungry? What kind of virus did you catch?" She snorted. Al put a hand on Ed's automail shoulder.
"Brother, we have to get you better. You can't keep going like this."
"Sorry, Al." He said softly. He looked at Winry and noticed her cheeks were puffy. She had been crying. He sighed, ashamed at the shape he was in. "I haven't been able to eat or feel right since that mission." He announced. Winry and Pinako looked at Al and back at him. Al leaned his head down, as if sad at the thought. Winry licked her lips.
"What happened, Al?" Ed nodded at his brother, not wanting to talk much. His throat hurt and he felt like he would get sick again if he kept at it. Al let out a hollow breath inside the armor and glanced out the window.
"There was a little boy and his father in the west…"
The father was a preacher, and a notable one in the small town where they resided. He had contacted Central HQ for some sort of military assistance, saying it was urgent. Mustang sent out Edward and his brother to check it out, telling them he was unaware of the details, but they were needed immediately. Ed and Al met with the preacher in the church, asking him questions as to why they were brought out there.
"Something is happening to the people of the town. One by one they die after a great sickness."
"What are we supposed to do? We aren't doctors!" Ed retorted, obviously annoyed. Al looked at the preacher with sadness.
"Why did you contact the military for this? Why not find a good doctor?"
"I needed someone who was familiar with alchemy. I was hoping you could combine it with the ways of this book to free them." Ed furrowed his brows, not understanding.
"What do you mean, old man? How can we cure a sickness with alchemy and a bible?"
"This is no mere sickness, you fools! These are demons we are talking about! They are possessing my people and killing them one by one!" He looked back at his little boy and cringed. The boy was playing in a pew, bashing his action figure's head against it repeatedly. "I fear my own child has become infected. Soon, he will come down with the sickness and be taken from me. I've tried exorcisms, I've tried doctors and drugs. Nothing will work. I dreaded the idea of science, but I am desperate."
"You're full of shit, man." Edward stood and stretched, ready to leave and get out of the town. Al watched the little boy and jumped back as he smiled at him, his eyes turning coal black.
"Brother, maybe we should hear him out."
"This is ridiculous, Al! There is no such thing as demons or angels or God or any of them! It's all just made up!" He ranted, storming out of the church. Al apologized to the preacher and ran after him, leaving the churchman to weep over his bible.
The brothers were to head out of town that night, but instead of making it to the train station, they were directed back towards the church by the sound of a blood-curdling scream. Edward had made it to the church first and busted down the door to find the preacher dead, his own son standing over him, caked with blood. The boy's eyes met his and Ed found himself thrown up against the wall. The little boy watched him slide down in a heap on the floor and walked over to him, straddling him and leaning down so that his lips were mere inches from Ed's. "An atheist, yes. I see now. You have a strong soul, but your fear will consume you in the end." The boy held up his hand and slammed it down on Ed's chest, making him scream. "I will take you down with me and my brethren!"
Edward had set aside the fact that the one attacking him was a 9 year old boy and protected himself, stabbing him through the heart with his automail. The boy fell down and died with a smile, laughing with his dying breath. Al helped Edward up and the oldest Elric shivered, feeling extremely cold. His chest ached and his head hurt as he watched the blood of the child soak at his feet. He tilted his head back and cried out his frustrations, never having thought he would have to kill a 9 year old boy.
"You did what you had to; he was going to kill you."
"No. He couldn't have. But something scared me so bad I just reacted. I can't get what happened out of my head." He admitted…but he wasn't telling them everything. He couldn't. Maybe I should have myself evaluated…I'm hearing voices, feeling urges that aren't me…Something isn't right at all. But I can't even tell my own brother.
You know what's wrong with you, Edward Elric. Ed felt his face drain of color, gaining the attention of everyone surrounding him. His heart began to pound in his ears and he stifled his breath. Say it, I dare you. You remember what I told you before. He gagged, putting a hand over his mouth. Pinako and Winry were up and their hands on his shoulders, but he pushed them back, closing his eyes and taking slow, deep breaths. "I'm ok." He opened his eyes back up and looked at Al, who seemed to know he was holding something back. The armored boy stood and looked at the two women in the room.
"Could I talk to Ed alone for a minute?" Pinako pulled out her pipe and prepared it for a smoke, nodding her head. Winry hesitated, watching her grandmother leave the room before stepping back from Ed, whom kept his eyes on her. She looked back at him and suddenly he found himself smiling. But it wasn't his smile. It was one full of malice and disturbance. Winry shivered and left the room. Edward shook his head and wiped the grin off his face, facing his brother afterward.
"What is it, Al?"
"Tell me what you really think, brother." Ed shook his head, surprised when he looked down and saw that he was continuously scratching at his flesh arm.
"I can't do that, Al."
"Why?" He scratched faster, wanting to stop, but feeling he had to keep going. Al grabbed his automail hand and stopped him, making him jerk back.
"Don't!" Ed shouted, seeing that his skin was bright red and very raw. "Don't…touch me."
. . . .
End Chapter two. Next chapter, Edward will begin to lose himself and Winry and Al will start to question whether it is a question of science or faith. Review!
