A/n: so chapter 1 is finally here. A special thanks to Dustwriter for helping me and encouraging me. i couldn't have done it without you. Feel free to pm me if you have questions about district Twelve's tradition or anything you can't wrap your head around.

Please bear with me, I'm new to all this and writing is so overwhelming!

I don't own the hunger games! Suzanne Collin's does!

Eighty-two days before...

My last day at the seam turns out harder than I expected it to. Who knew saying goodbye would be so arduous? Effie excused me from all my chores for today so I had a full day to myself. I had already packed, there was not much to pack; all my stuff easily fit into a medium sized leather suitcase.

Once in my room, I go through my mini library crammed in the trunk at the foot of the bed. I'm looking for the last book I borrowed from Sae. I need to return it before I go away. I couldn't take all my books with me to Mellark's home and it would be useless to carry around extra weight onboard. Effie has promised to take care of my books while I'm away. Many a times I had thought of donating them to the one-shelf library at this community home but the idea of parting with them permanently was a bit too much for me to handle. Many of girls here didn't like to read anyway, except for Leevy. She is the only one here to whom I'd happily lend novels then we would go on and on about the books. Here in the Seam it is regarded as awaste of time to read books for fun. Who has time to read extra books when you have so many text books?, many would comment-including my mother. And some people would say, it's an unhealthy for a girl to read, it fills her head with wrong ideas. But those were the antifeminist types believing a girl should not read, just stay put at home breeding throngs of unkempt children, waiting for her husband dutifully as he fought or mined in the mountains. My father was different; He always encouraged my passion. He always got me books as presents for every occasion I can remember. For my twelfth birthday he gave me his copy of "Great Expectations" which is as sacred to me as holy book can be

I'm just putting Scott Westerfeld's "Uglies" in my satchel to return, I had borrowed it then last time I went to visit Sae at Hob. When Effie taps on my door and informs my mother has shown up to say good bye. Mymotherlooks uncomfortableand I pretend I'm not bothered. It is taking all in me not to storm out of here. She left us, me and Prim when we needed her the most. That is enough reason for me not to want her again. After exchanging an unceremonious cold hug my mother leaves mumbling something about getting back to the dispensary. I turn away not interested in her new found life- which doesn't include me.

Thatafternoon I swing my satchel across one shoulder and leave the Home. I sprint out to the meadow, where Prim and what's left of my Father wait for me. The graveyard is solemn and quiet; like its inhabitants. I lay down between Prim and Father's resting plots. This is my happy place. This is where I'm not alone. At first people thought I was under the influence of a demon: Laying next to graves, talking to myself or someone they couldn't see but soon they got over it, pitying me for a crazy girl mourning her deceased father and sister. Hazelle Hawthorne found me here many timeswhen she came here to light candles or incense sticks on her husband's grave. She would always give me disapproving looks and tell me to go home.

I turn to Prim like I always did whenever she lay next to me at night. I see a handful white rose petals scattered across her tiny headstone and wonder who might have done that.

"I'm going Prim," I tell her.

The warm breeze blows in response. I smell the rose petals, freshly scatter from Abel Hawthorne's grave. Rory or Vick or maybe his widow has visited his grave not that long ago. Maybe the put the rose petal on Prim and father's grave, which was very unlike of them. They had never done anything like this before.

"I won't be long gone; it's just a few months," I say reassuring myself instead of her "Prim, do you think they have a roller coaster where I'm going?" I ask the headstone. "Should I ride it? You always wanted to ride one."

During her stay at the hospital Prim had made a bucket list of the many things she endeavored to do after she got out of the hospital. Riding a roller coaster was one of the many silly important things. After her death I still kept that list. I was sent to community home immediately because there was no home to go back to. A year later I found that list again and without thinking I did the first thing she wanted to do; drink a full glass of water. I cried my eyes out as I gulped it, remembering how she would beg for water prior to each of her surgery. I ticked off the first thing and as strange as it may sound; I felt Prim. That was the first time I actually felt her. In an unexplainable way I wasn't alone again. It satisfied me, doing things for her like she was a part of me.

"I don't think I would. You know I'm scared of heights." I smile, imagining Prim would protest, crossing her tiny arms pouting at me saying, "It's not fair! You should…for me… please?"

"Dad, you remember when I told you I'll go to the place where Statue of Liberty is?" I turn to face my father's headstone and laugh reminiscing the day when a 5 year old katniss told her father she'd go to capitol one day. "I'm going there!"

Dad had asked me once,"Where would you like to go when you get older?" I had jumped out of his lap, grabbing the remote and mother's sewing book. I came back standing in front of father blocking his view of TV, holding the book in one hand and the remote like the torch in other, just like "Lady Liberty" does.

"I want to go to this place where the lady doing this stands!" I stated excitedly. At that time I wasn't aware I was referring to Capitol. Father smiled at my enthusiasm shaking his head "Well, good luck going there," he said, smirking. Little did I know I would be going there now but he won't be here to witness it.

Time flies as I lay there talking neither expecting nor getting a reply. It's late in the afternoon when I make my way to the Hob. Greasy Sae smiles at me when I approach her book stall. "Aren't you supposed to be on a plane right now, I thought you left already?" she wears an easy going smile.

"Well I couldn't leave without saying good bye and I had to return this." I say taking out the Uglies from my satchel.

"Right on time as always. Did you like it?" She asks, putting it back on the pile without even checking, she knows I'd never vandalize a book; it's blasphemous to me.

"It was good I guess, but I wasn't expecting it to be the way it turned out." I shrug.

No doubt Uglies was a good book but Tally becoming a pretty disappointed me. I liked Shay better then tally though.

"Maybe it'll make more sense once you read the sequels. I couldn't get my hands on them for you when the last containers unloaded here." She tells me.

Seam dirt roads are used by Capitol to transport containers caring aids and goods for Peace Keepers in district thirteen. Sometimes Rebels loot the containers. Hob is the black market where the containers merchandise is sold. The authorities have turned a blind eye to it because they can't mess with Rebels. Greasy and many like her make a living depending on looted containers.

"Oh. It's okay. I'm leaving anyway." I try to sound not too disappointed.

"But I have something even better. Got only one copy at the last unloading and I saved it for you." She ducks behind the makeshift counter rummaging till she finds what she is looking for.

"Here we go." She hands me a novel which is clearly new from the condition of its binding. "Since you like to read about dystopian worlds I reckon you'll like this."

"Thanks but I can't borrow it now;I'm leaving today and I don't think you'd lend a book for months." I study the book cover, a golden bird in a circular ring catching an arrow as if to deflect its direction, draws my attention. I want to buy it but I can't. I brought money to buy myself new second hand Boots. The pair I'm currently wearing has holes in soles.

What do I needmost Boots? I think to myself. Or this book?

Boots?

Book!

Boots!

BOOK!

Observing my inner turmoil she says, "Keep it."

"Oh I can't!" I interject politely. Though the black book cover is intriguing, taking a book for free feels wrong "THE HUNGER GAMES" reads the title.

What kind of a Book is it? Maybe it was about a dystopian world where people played a game for food, I think.

"Take this as your going away gift from my side, kid," Greasy says kindly.

"No I can't. Here," I hand her the money I was saving up to buy boots, I'll just have to avoid puddles on my way from now on.

"You are just like your father. Headstrong, never taking favors," she says softly "but it's ok sometimes to except gifts."

"But Sae…" I'm cut off by the look she gives me.

"Katniss Everdeen you are taking this book and you are taking it as a Gift and that's the end of it."

"Thank you" I mumble, not wanting to argue. I'll find another way to make it up to her.

"Now that's like a good girl…" she pats me on my shoulder.

After bidding Sae goodbye I buy a secondhand cell phone from Ripper's small shack. I walk out of the black market, stuffing my newly purchased boots into my satchel. The phone is an old keypad model which works fine; its only drawback is the right earbud of its headphone is busted. It's all I could manage to buy. I need one to keep in contact with Effie and honestly I can't buy a phone in capitol.

On my way out I hear my old nickname shouted from nearby; nobody used, that nickname anymore - except one person. My childhood friend, Gale Hawthorne. He would sneak up on me, pull my pigtails while crooning "Catnip ... Catnip" in his mocking baby voice as I would chase him down for ruining my hair. But that was when we were little; Prim and Rory weren't born yet and it was just me and Gale. He was 4 years older than me but my boyish interests eventually made us buddies. Then inseparable, best friends.

"Catnip?" I know this voice but its depth is new to me.

"Gale?" I turn and there he stands, taller them I remember with a hint of scruff on his chin. How long has it been since I saw him? 5 years? 6? Maybe more.

"It's been so long, look at you! You've grown up," he says moving to pull me in for a friendly hug like we did so easy when we were kids but stopping mid step realizing we aren't kids any more.

"Well you're not a baby yourself anymore," I smile at him, to dissipate the tension.

"Yeah I've been told that," he awkwardly smiles and rubs the back of his neck with his right hand, which makes me wonder how many girls have told him that.

I wait for him to say something.

"I visited the meadow today," he offers to start a conversation.

That explains the rose petals on Prim's grave, I speculate.

"Yeah," I shrug. There is nothing else I can say. I don't speak of Prim's death to people. They'll just tell me she is gone, that I should move on, lecturing me not to go to the graveyard. I'm not ready to hear this lecture from him too.

"So how have you been?" He sounds concerned. "I never got the chance to see you after Prim died. How are you holding up?"

His concern rubs me the wrong way. He couldn't be there when she breathed her last; he had to work in the mines. And after, all he couldn't do anything to save her "Gale I appreciate it but now is not the time to…." I fumble.

"Yeah, you're right, we don't have to talk about it but still I want to know: How you are doing?" he says, trying to revive the conversation.

"I'm doing okay," I brush him off.

"I'm very sorry I couldn't be there, Katniss, but I always asked mom about you," he offered, like it made up for all the time.

Gale was sixteen and I was eleven when our fathers died in the explosion at Town Square. Dad was walking Prim home from school that afternoon. I had to stay home that day to do laundry because Mother wasn't feeling well. Some say it was a Capitol drone; others claimed it was a suicide bomber. I would never know. All I know is that Gale lost his childhood and I lost my heart that day. He left to work in the mines at the Seam border to make a living for his siblings and mother while I begged Prim to survive her burns.

"Yeah and I'm sure she didn't have good things to say about me," I replied sarcastically. Of all people I know she hates my guts.

He defends his mother with, "No…Not really. She is just worried about you."

"Well she does seem to care about me more than my own mother," I force a laugh, and he joins in faking a grin.

"So where are you going?" he asks.

"Back to my place," I say. "Bye." I walk away.

"Wait Katniss! I'll walk you there." He joins me without my approval.

"No it's ok, please don't trouble yourself."

"I insist and besides you shouldn't be out here alone, it's not safe for a girl to be on her own," He sounds stern, but I don't take him seriously.

"Gale that's nice of you, but you know you can't be around me all the time," I say.

"Well maybe I can do something about that," he winks at me as he walks ahead, waiting for me to join him.

He can't be serious, I think. Is he really hinting about that day when our mothers had agreed to betroth us? I thought the whole deal was put behind he went away and I went fanatical (according to his mother).


It was a typical afternoon; Gale and I were playing tag in the backyard, our mothers knitting in the sun watching over us. I was 5 and he was 10 at that time. Our mothers called for us to take a time out and that was when they told us.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Gale had asked naively. Neither of us knew what 'betrothal' meant.

"It means Kitty will get to live with you," my mother enlightened him sweetly.

"Like forever?" he questioned, keyed up.

"Yes," his mother nodded.

"Katniss you hear that?" Gale took my hand, dragging me away to the tree house. "Come on …We can live together and play all the time you can stay with me in the tree house."

"Hold on Gale," his mother stopped him before he could pop my arm out of the socket, "you can't have her just now you'll have to wait."

"Why? Why can't she just come over now?" he complained.

"Because you both need to be older to get married." my mother explained lovingly.

"Married like you and daddy?" I asked astonished, horror in my eye. Gale was my best friend but he always ordered me around and I did not like that. To be married to him meant following his orders like his mother followed his father's and like my mother followed my father's "Yes like me and daddy," my mother nodded, smoothing my hair.

"Does that mean she gets to sleep in bed with me?" he questioned, thrilled like he was allowed candy for dinner. "Like you and daddy do?"

"EXACTLY… like me and daddy," his mother affirmed and broke into a laugh.

My mother joined in her laughing. I looked at Gale; their laughter was lost on me. What was so funny? He just shrugged.

"But I don't want to!" I objected, crossing my arms jutting my belly like I did every time something wasn't to my liking.

"Why, Katniss?" Hazelle asked.

"Because he pees in the bed!" I complained. And that was an honest answer. He was chronic bed wetter.

"I DO NOT!" Gale exclaimed and charged at me but I ran away. We played tag and our mothers' laughter rang in the afternoon air.


My stomach knots at his words and the obvious implication. I walk after him.

I have never been the "crushing type". I had missed Gale all this time when he was away but not the way girls miss boys they are bothered to. Becoming Gale's wife! The idea is a hard pill to swallow. I don't have a say in any of this. Our traditions don't work that way. Parents have all the legal right to marry off their children to whomever they find suitable.

"So what you got there, "he points at the book in my hand, as the possibility runs through my head.

"It's just a book," I say, wondering if he likes to read. Desperately finding myself hoping he approves of a girl reading. "What is it about?" He takes it from me.

"I don't know, I just got it," I shrug, not sure what to do with my free hands. I clasp them other keeping from shaking. Since when did I started shivering in Gale's presence? Since he reminded you he is going to marry you. I answer my own question.

"You still read these storybooks?" He holds it up in air waving it in my face, mockingly so he still remembers I used to read, he used to get impatient with me but never told me to stop it.

"Please don't tell me you're against a girl reading books now!" I say a bit too hastily.

"No, actually I believe a woman should be made to read," he reassures me. "It's just what you read should be based on…Reality. It should be intellectual." All of a sudden he sounds like my mother: "What use is it to read fiction? It's all lies!"

"It may sound weird but I think truth is buried beneath the fiction, you just have to look for it," I say as I play with the zipper of my satchel.

"You're right. You do sound weird 'cause that made no sense," he says, like calling me weird is Okay. I'm taken aback. I hate being called weird; he of all people should know that!

"So according to you reading novels is…?" I wait for him to answer, giving him a chance to retract what he just said.

"I think it's a waste of time, I mean, you should read books that make you think, about things that really matter."

"I think novels are based on things that matter too."

"Like?" he challenges.

"Friendship, true love, bravery…" I was going to argue further but he cut me off.

"Oh please, gimme a break that is all bullshit, Catnip," he rolls his eyes as he walk on "there is more to life than that; life isn't the happy ever after like in those story books. People die! Children are orphaned; the world is a dark place. There is no prince, no magic, and no fairy Godmother."

His words leave me speechless. He may be right, but I still won't concur to his point of view. For me books were more than that. I had lost myself in Wonderland with Alice with when I was 5. I had traveled the world with Phileas Fogg as I read through "Around the World in 80 days" in a boring Geography class. I swear I had tasted chocolate on my tongue as I took a stroll through Willy Wonka's chocolate factory with Charlie. There were times when I laughed, cried, hyperventilated as Harry, Ron and Hermione embarked on new adventures to destroy the Horcruxes. Books were all I had in this gray village.

I now see it, life as a miner had made him callous. Gale is a Man now. He had a point to which I couldn't disagree but I tend to see life differently than he does. I can see we don't have much in common anymore. He hate something I love dearly, books that is.

"How about we agree to disagree?" I stop in my tracks.

"Okay," he gives me a smile and shrugs. "Fine by me."

Won't be once we get married, I think.

We walk for another ten minutes and in these ten minutes I come to know Gale highly disapproves of me going to the Capitol, according to him "it's not safe out there" especiallyfor a girl.

"I can take care of myself!" I finally snap at him. It's hardly been 30 minutes since we met and we're having an argument, a heated one. Some idealistic couple we are. He stops at the gates, not coming inside asking me to be carefulin the Capitol. I turn on my heels, just when he dips his head to what seem like an attempt to kiss me. He tugs on my arm, making me face him once again.

"I get to kiss you Goodbye." He says pulling me closer.

"Gale No," I lean away "I don't do that stuff before marriage."

"It's just a kiss, besides you are my fiancé, I can kiss you. Don't you want to kiss me?" he argues but backs off. At least he is being a gentleman.

"Gale! I want to kiss you after we get married." I say to get him off my back without hurting his pride.

I want to tell him I don't consider us engaged, but right now is not the time to remind him that we aren't technically engaged. It's part of tradition, for the man to properly ask parents once again for the girl's hand in marriage when they both come of age, even if they are bothered at childhood. They're not considered engaged if the man doesn't have the approval of guardian (in my case my mother) to see his fiancé. It's after approval that the girl can wear her engagement ring.

"Well I should be going then, stay safe catnip, I'm leaving for mines tomorrow but I'll go to your mother and ask for her blessing and your hand when I come next time." He promises.

I nod giving him a peck on one cheek as a thanks for being understanding and dash away.

I still have two hours to kill before Haymitch comes to pick me for airport. I decide to go to the creek out back of the community home; a place which we aren't allowed to go to, but I found a great spot. The giant maple trees and their dangling branches hid me well from intruding eye as I sit reading for hours. I sit in the same spot; my back on the trunk of a tree. Bringing my hand up to my lips I wonder if I did the right thing, by not kissing Gale. The more I think about him the more I feel confused and so just to get him off of my mind, I open the book in my lap and begin to read...

"PART 1 THE TRIBUTES"

Two hours and 24 pages later to be exact I put the book down. Not because I need a break but because an image flashes in my mind. I'm at this part where Katina Sheen explicates Peter Malrick's appearance, out of nowhere Peeta Mellark's blue eyes sneak in the back of my mind. I picture Peeta's broad shoulders, his blonde hair when I read about Peter and the more I read on the more Peeta Mellark seem to worm his way into my thought, his eyes, his smile, his blonde hair. After three successful weeks of ignoring the blonde boy for the sake of my own virtue, I have again zapped his features in my head like I already know him.

"No! No! No! Don't you dare think about him! It's wrong!" I lecture myself.

I forbid myself for the second time not to think of him again. Wishing occlumency was real, so that I could stop him from getting into my head. I vow not be near this boy, which is a hard task given that both of us are supposed to live under a safe roof. Gale and his promise is far off of my mind.

I sigh out loud which sounds more like a groan of exasperation and get up to get ready for Haymitch to take me to the airport. He will be giving me orientation, introducing me to my sponsor, and getting me vaccinated before I'm sent off to Mellarks'.

A/n: please do review. they make me type faster. Feel free to pm me if you want to beta this fanfiction. sorry for any grammatical or spelling errors.